Monday, January 26, 2015

Leviticus 11:10- 12

Verse 10 states that any living thing that moves in the rivers or seas and does not have fins and scales are an abomination to eat. This applies to the Jews and from what I recall in the New Testament, Peter was shown all these unclean animals by God and then the Lord commanded Peter to eat. Peter was like "What? Am I dreaming?" Peter was a good Jewish boy while growing up, so why would he throw away his upbringing right then and there? It took Peter a good three times, I suppose, just like he denied the deity of Christ three times. Anyhow because of Christ in the New Testament, Peter was able to ingest these unclean animals the Lord had originally commanded the Jews to abstain from. It feels so contradictory.

Verses 11-12 state that the Jews will not eat the flesh of these creatures without fins and scales that live in the river or seas. They will also regard the carcasses of those creatures as an abomination. Furthermore, those creatures are an abomination. What I can think of off the bat are mammals like whales, seals, and dolphins. Also, I believe this would exclude frog legs as well.

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Changing Up Blog

I'm switching from personal journal to now more of something about trying to do Bible studies. I'm basically going for a complete overhaul with the structure of this blog. For my personal life, I'm going to basically keep a diary for that. This basically means that I'm going to be making a bunch of Dear Diary entrees for my eyes only and God can take a peek too whenever He wants. Imagine, I had a hard life going with a Dear Diary week and then I shared it to my teacher. Okay, I was young back then and didn't even know what I was putting there. I just fudged it and said stuff like I played basketball with my friends and learned stuff. I put stuff like I want to try really hard and study hard. 

For all of the rest of the previous posts I made, I'm just going to leave it up here. It just looks too cool for me and feels great in having made one post a day per year starting with 2010. So enjoy it because whether anybody thinks I'm crazy or not, I'm going to turn massively boring while trying to put my study of the Bible verse by verse.

Monday, January 19, 2015

Writing Out So Many Goals

The most simple goal to attain for happiness, if one ever does have it is to do nothing. Sure, he or she will have to deal with the cold or heat from lack of ventilation while also hunger and thirst, but if one can obtain true happiness from doing nothing, I'd like to hear about it! Loosely, I'm going to just as a joke point my fingers to monks who sit there and chant all day. Well, it is doing something for a living- it might be weird, but it figures if they are happy.

The lesson I'm getting from this post is that sometimes, the most important people in life are your parents and close friends you grew up with. I don't know how important the wife is yet because I haven't been married, but I learned that it is considered to be legally the most important relationship recognized by the U.S. Supreme Court.

These are my incomprehensible and hard goals that I must struggle to put together and learn to get by with, so I must apologize for any lack of inconvenience if I strike a vein. I've learned that the benefit of writing on a blog is that it helps retain information better, especially for the writer. Some people are readers, like I've been getting at least someone in the planet to browse through these. So here's my list:

  • 1. Graduate with a Master's in IT. Gain some positive experience with the career and use it to promote some good work in the corporate world and also with family and friends. 
  • 2. Workout and get a six-pac and some muscles.
  • 3. Continue to do growing taller exercises and try products, even if they don't work!
  • 4. Make my face a lot cleaner by doing eye threading and plucking out excess hair and treating my face to make the pores smaller and tighter.
  • 5. Become rich off of trading stocks and currencies.
  • 6. Be a knowledgeable and practicing Christian from studying the Bible daily.
  • 7. Play games and the piano and get better with my music and artistry skills.
  • 8. Eventually find myself a beautiful significant other to fall in love with and settle down with.
In conclusion, I am really about doing a lot of things at once and wearing myself down. I am starting to like the feeling with being consistent at something. I'm going to work at my own emotions. If I can get these stuff, then I think I'll be pretty happy in this life. 

Using Multiple Blogs

I'm using my diary and limiting on writing stuff that could put me in a serious, negative light. The problem I have figured out is that some people take things way too seriously and don't get their way with an issue and have to compromise. They don't like to be in conflict while feeling bad about they have been doing and will do knee-jerk reactions. I'm not mentioning names anymore because it really isn't the right thing to do on here.

I'm going to limit the stuff that could potentially make me look bad in my own private thoughts and actions now. It's going to be more about practicing my manners for a life-long thing. I'm just trying to do the right thing at all costs, even if people think I suck at it and I get a bad taste on my mouth from doing it.

I'm realizing that from doing all of these things, I'm actually working on myself.

So Much To Try

I met up with a close female friend and technically it was a date, but more along the lines of just catching up and staying friends. Bluntly speaking, it's nothing dealing with her but I'm not really attracted to her. I'm just using her to learn new things about myself and to also discover how people perceive me.

I don't really know how, but I just like connecting with people even if they have issues with me. I believe that you have to work at things from the bottom-up because it's the experience and lessons you learn from a first-hand basis that help shape you as a person. I feel like I did something wrong, but I don't think they'll be talking about it and it won't pop up in national news to put me in a negative light because the incident isn't even that big and funny for others. Let's see if that happens the next few minutes for me.

Happy Martin Luther King Day

To me, Martin Luther King Jr. reminds of going through adversity and then being recognized nationally by the country for future generations to learn about while growing up. I honestly feel that the description of just adversity doesn't really do enough justice for what this man went through in history. While growing up, I was taught in school and encyclopedias that he was assassinated. I did have a strong interest for civil affairs as a child because I was sensitive from feeling like a weakling.

Nowadays, I'm no longer afraid of being in the middle of negative attention. I think I should be going after bigger causes though. In a way, what I have been dealing with is the small grounds and trying to keep my emotions in check. Overall, the lesson I get out of today's date is that some things are really worth losing your life over while being in peaceful protest.

Thursday, January 15, 2015

What Focus Should Be On

I see how from browsing through movie categories, the focus shouldn't really be on making people laugh. It should really be more about a strong purpose that connects well with the audience and then spread the fun even longer with some more jokes and comedy on the side. It really helps to have very likable and talented people working on something and committed to making the world a better place!

I'm going to try to just give my best then and work very hard. The peers I currently have to compete with aren't really that big on the long run. This doesn't mean that I shouldn't connect with them. It should really be about finding balance and having a purpose which is to be pleasing to the Lord. I'm not really writing this blog to entertain anyone. It's only something that I'm putting up to just share with the world and to help me overcome my own obstacles in life. I'm noticing that for myself, in order to get better I have to make personal sacrifices of temporary pleasure so that I can invest my time into a better future.

I've learned that from having exposure to something that could be bad if abused on the long run, the best way is to just cut it off right there and run away from it. It's to basically avoid it. I'm going to try to continue to make improvements in my life.

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Going Back To School

I have only a Bachelor's in Computer Science. It's really not that much, even though some people would feel a little jealous or wish they had gone to college for the experience. My best friend is not really that smart and pretty much got put on academic probation, which really sucks. He wasn't partying and drinking at frat parties like a spoiled rotten kid. He just wasn't born that very intelligent. He tries so hard to analyze situations and gets carried away into his own dream world often and will communicate how he's right and just justify by saying it sounds right. I don't really like that about him either because it gets annoying sometimes.

Anyway, I am going back to school for a Master's now in Information Technology. I'm choosing the online path with a well-accredited online school that's very affordable. For myself, I just have like this love and hate relationship with programming software. I just keep on pushing even through all of that mental stress and feeling overwhelmed by the programming task. One thing that is for certain and how another forgotten colleague agreed with me in is that finishing the coding of project and getting it working feels very good! I used to program in the last minute and stay up for an all night-er.

Imagine I had very good time management, then I would have had enough time to download answers into my brain for acing my exams! I became like a very fast pro at programming projects. It was something I put my heart and soul into and something I still do to this day. However, if I could add in better time management with my schedule; oh man, I'll be rocking with straight A's. I read from a blog of a guy with a Ph. D. that to be successful in the I.T. world, you have to be a good at coding. This is something I have down pretty well, so if I only invest my time wisely, I can be in it for the long haul.

I think graduate school is like my second chance at life with becoming a programmer. I became good at it with a Bachelor's and felt like I wasn't noticed and became burnt out from procrastinating so much and then passing the courses. I was so on it with programming and managed to make all of my projects work. I'm so happy that I was able to do that. The written exam portions, man I would just completely bomb those exams. It was from the result of poor time management and having a hard time staying awake in class and meditating on all the theories.

Possible Ideas With Blogging

Okay, I need to go wash up and take a shower after this. I put up so much ideas that I need to fondle with and get up to optimal standards with. I'm also thinking about creating an extra blog for all my investments. I'm thinking about just leaving it out there for free and for others to really read about my ideas if they are interested. I don't really care about getting paid for helping others invest while at my own convenience. In a way, I'm learning more about my personal behaviors as a trader then.

I don't plan on being ultra successful of a trader, but I'm going to stick to it with everything so I can automate a routine that I personally enjoy and then communicate about it. I'm thinking about how some traders might actually try to communicate with me, but I'm really thinking about not really saying anything back to them. I'm just going to offer an overview of what I did and do a little bit of analysis and that's that.

Building Confidence

I feel like I don't really have everything going yet and that I really need to spend some more time developing while going out more with different types of people. That's why they have for all the busy people who get rejected by common people, who don't feel it's necessary to go out and have fun.

I'm trying to get into the habit of prayer and reading the Bible daily. I feel a little stuck because I feel tied to reading the Scriptures and blogging. I actually have an idea then, I'm going to conveniently write about the Bible in order then as much as I have time, but on my own personal time, I can actually read the Bible then. Reading is way more faster than writing for me.

I'm going to get myself a membership gym then because I think I need to avoid exposure to the sun and also I can have fun breaking treadmills and exercise equipment at the expense of the gym. I have a habit of abusing equipment and breaking them with disregard for others.

I really like that idea of using a treadmill to do some trail running. I could probably hook up a tablet to also watch movies or listen to songs or whatever I have purposed in my heart to do. Maybe I could try to read a book even while exercising on the treadmill! I have so much ideas that I'm blogging about right now and thinking of trying.

I'm really thinking about combining my home and the gym to be a combination of doing some work outs. I have so much clutter in my head right now and it just shuts down when I want to be lazy and just be entertained for a short period. The entertainment feels cheap because I don't really have a family to settle down with right now. It looks like I just need to push myself and be stressed out even if I feel like I'm going to fail. I think that's how my best friend is- he feels like he's going to fail and that it's going to be hopeless after getting negative signs. He's really basing his life off of perceiving signs and wonders with his feelings of happiness or anything negative. He also likes to work against the tide and ignore everything bad, but then opts out in a positive note. Basically, he's taking a break from pursuing his goals while thinking like he's a champion. I don't really like that about him.

Things For Me To Do

I actually have an interest for playing video games still after all these years. I think it's going to be like a life-long thing. When I have a family, I'm probably not going to play that often from being busy, but yeah, playing video games are fun!

I'm taking up some golf now too. What is crazy is that I strive for excellence and greatness in everything I do. If I can't be professional with something, then I feel a little bad, but at the same time, I feel patient about developing my skills. As the day progresses, I end up doing something where I could just relax and have fun while I think about the little things I need to do to make my life more better. Those thoughts can get to me sometimes.

Now that I remember, I was actually about going out to run around right now. I'm going to try to focus on creating a diet and workout plan. I'm really thinking about doing so many things at once with so little time. I'm constantly like this and feel boggled down while also trying to find room for getting an opportunity to date someone pretty and nice.

Actually, I don't really care about the appearance, but I prefer going for dating someone I'm physically attracted to. It sounds a little contradictory because I would marry a person with an awesome personality over someone who has outer beauty and is lousy. I feel like the attraction would be helpful for me in finding the right type of girl to stay constantly motivated with. I basically weigh on the long-term scale of 90% personality and 10% looks. On the short scale, I'm taking the exact opposite. If I could find someone with both looks and personality, I'm only going to love her because of her personality because that's just how I prefer with the way of things. If this pretty girl I fell in love with became physically ugly or lost a few limbs and then became incapacitated, I wouldn't tell her she's ugly of course, but I would still passionately love her from being like my wife.

I notice that for myself my mind, body, and heart wants to just get lazy and relax. It's like if I have to push myself to stress out a little more as the night progresses. I then leave those thoughts on auto-pilot and then try to push it aside by doing something fun. Then, I realize that I've lost already like three hours, when I could have used that time to go to sleep from being bored with my long term goals, but at least I would have made the effort. I'm going to try to instead of just watching T.V. when I get home and falling on the couch, I'm going to try to get up and do something else now.

I've been beating my age old sin still by just avoiding the action when I'm tempted. If I view the temptation, which is pretty much the start of my sin, I just need to run away from it in my head and avoid it even more. I'm succeeding from just having this going on with me on auto-pilot.

Maybe I can avoid the small pitfalls in my life and do stuff to make myself happy. I like pursuing after very attractive women in big or small ways. I'm going to try to do it while being nice or pushed around by bigger guys. It's like I have to use time and fortune on my side to try to get that interaction going. Of course, many of those women are already going to be taken, instead of being available. It doesn't really bother me that much, and I will remain a gentleman about it even if I'm not given any credit at all from coming across as an annoying brat to people who think I'm crazy.

Anime Critique

From watching some anime, I became hooked onto those shows where all the female characters end up falling in love with the main, male character. I think it's a bunch of baloney, so I'm going to avoid watching anime because it feels like a waste of time now.

Also, I was messing around on Craigslist for dating and I realize that's not a great idea too. You have to spend a lot of time writing and sending your photo to strangers who could possibly be not that attractive or with personalities that might not be that worthwhile. Those strangers haven't really messaged me back with their photo that often. I think I'll try dating sites then because at least the women on there have photos to show. I can just message the ones I feel are attractive to me then based on their photos. It's a paid membership type of deal but I think if I work hard at it, then I might be able to find a couple quality dates.

My cousin told me about scams that go on with online dating sites, where the women will try to get you to send their money. Even if I feel some form of trust with them, I'm not sending them money. I'm not even going to pay for their food even, if I meet up with them. I can wait and have patience. I'm just about working hard now and keeping a leveled head.

Monday, January 12, 2015

Saving Energy and Not Doing Simulated Flashback

I'm wearing myself out from doing stuff to make myself happy, by looking into the past and reenacting scenes in my head. I'm getting out of my chair and looking at the mirror and rehearsing what I feel I should have done. The one thing I'm so happy about not doing was tackling my former, male friends on the ground and screaming at them and then putting them through one of my unfair military style boot camps, while putting on the hat of a nice drill instructor (one who never says a curse word, but will exaggerate the word to imply that still while using polite words and screaming and shouting at the person).

I'm also glad that when I scared a frenemy (a guy who switches around from being my friend to being against me because he's legally from taking special education courses a little retarded) who was with them and he knocked me to the floor and I got up really fast, I didn't end up punching him all over the place and kicking him below his belt continuously and then taking control of the situation and scaring all of them while putting on my nice drill instructor cap and then showing them how nice of a person I really am, which would confuse the heck out of them and mess up their sense of moral judgement with me.

I leave people very speechless with the stuff I communicate because there's really nothing like it. It's also one of those things that make you want to smile, if you are not a part of it, but later on, you would just move on if you forgot about it. I think I'm just going to sit down and release the energy in a more quiet-spirited manner and then keep pressuring myself to focus on good things like my career and investing my time with finding a beautiful woman to settle down with.

There are pretty ladies I admire and get along very well with, but they are all taken. There's this one single girl who is exceptionally friendly with me and wasn't laughing with me when another lady suggested I get with her. She has an awesome personality, but I'm not really attracted to her appearance. There's another tall girl there too who greets me with a hint of reluctance, but says it so nicely at the same time; I don't know if she likes me or is just mad at me because I was laughing and smiling at her situations quite a bit. That place is so pro-friendly with having me around. I'm not really attracted to both of their appearances, even though some guys would call me an idiot for thinking that way. Yeah, I'm very picky and so lethargic with putting my pursuits into action. I'm also a little uncomfortable with their spiritual backgrounds, even though their beliefs are so firmly rooted in Christ. Hey, now then, I don't really have anything against them now; it's probably just me being uncomfortable with putting my belief system into place and being with them. I'm just crazy and different.

How I'm Fortunate And Going For Impossible Tasks

I'm fortunate to be born into a loving family; they don't show it that much to me with open arms. I'm sure my sister has a hard time being around my parents and me sometimes. I live in a very comfortable setting currently, but I feel underneath that if I don't invest in my future now, then I'm going to heavily pay for it later on down the road. I plan on living a pretty long and healthy life right now. Nobody knows for sure, but my grandparents passed away at an old age, and they only left while they were barely around 90 years old. Barely? No, I'm just kidding.

That's pretty old, but they passed away while developing a little dementia. The symptoms of my grandparents were that they became annoying and started repetitively talking about how they wanted to die. I'm not kidding- it made me angry listening to them complaining about not passing away soon enough, while they were in so much emotional pain. My grandparents went through some type of crisis and ran out of steam in their weak and feeble minded bodies. Oh, how I wish they were here while being the same, strong and reliable people again and who I used to adore and take granted for. Man, with me being so annoyed at them during their last years, I was just being crazy and going through mentally tough challenges.

So that's a little bit of my heart I'm sharing with the world. I don't really have that much drama going on with my life; I feel like I'm not someone you would want to connect with because you would hold very high expectations with me and then get disappointed later on. I feel like I have a history of causing some mental trauma for crazy people or those who I felt messed me up pretty badly. The more I talk in a random and unscripted manner while being totally honest, the more I get away with stuff because I'm about choosing to follow the Lord no matter what!

Maybe, people don't really warm up to me because I don't really have what they are looking for. I'm not really angry about that because I do the same to others. Or maybe, people do like me during certain periods of time but I happen to not be there. I'm so different in that I don't shout out bad words to people, which I notice in common people. The common people basically for the men, who are in their twenties, want to get in on all the fun action with girls; many of them get lucky, too. The women, well, I don't know what's going on with them; they just talk, talk, and talk- some of it is good and the rest is just plain blah blah! I'm just basing off this experience from how I've been observing my own sister and close female friend. They are both not really my type either.

My type must be like an ultra fine and super loving person. I don't really care about the appearance later on with a relationship though. If she's the one for me because I was attracted to her appearance a little and then was able to hit it off, then I might as well let that happen. I think the problem for me is that I'm getting a little desperate at times.

I'm going to accept my primal urges and in turn, behave like a gentleman while trying to approach the woman I'm interested in. What I mean is that, I'm going to assume that being attracted to a woman's looks is pretty much the woman putting her best foot forward with me; whether the woman has been gifted with the beauty or not. Later on, if I fall in love with her, then the appearance won't even matter to me. I'm so smart that I can already prejudge this type of situation for myself. Basically, what I'm saying is that if I'm not interested with a woman's appearance at the moment, then I should just look to move on from her now.

I shouldn't really be wasting my time, like I have been doing with two crazy girls who used to be friendly with me. Because of their craziness, despite some tempting things about them, they are not that pretty to me anymore or never really was to begin with. I think those girls have been acting that way because it's a point of pride for them- stupid, I know. I'm not going to share how to keep them from bothering a person because that's something I believe a person should figure out on his or her own; besides, everyone's method is different. I finally figured it out after I don't know, after about four years elapsed. That's really not that bad at all, even though it feels like a lifetime ago! I no longer have to feel anger or resentment towards them because I know what to say or write to them that will make me permanently happy without getting arrested and always motivate me to not be angry with them while getting those moody feelings.

I'm basically someone whose always looking for the big K.O. punch to score the win against people I have been in conflict with. It makes me happy, but for now, I have to be an honorable man because for some reason, I made an oath with God as my witness to not do something, until I've obtained some form of greatness. This greatness is T.M.I. (too much information), I know- I'm going for becoming wealthy on my own and getting some six pac abs. I have a lot of hard work to do to get there, and I'm not giving up even if I die trying to get there and never go back to confront that one dumb person I'm so mad at.

The other oath is easy, I promised the girl that I won't talk to her for a year. When I mention craziness, I'm not saying the person is crazy, so that means I'm not crazy to begin with at all. She has been mentioning that I'm crazy, but from doing that, she is almost setting up a mirror effect of who she really is and saying that only because she wants to be left alone and can't get me in trouble for it.

Oh My Gosh, The Mind Is Working!

I am so darn good at winning silly arguments with crazy people now. I haven't been able to confirm if it's for people with all walks of life. I have a talent and knack for getting somewhere in life. This time what I've been upgrading into my arsenal is being nice while working through personal adversity. By being able to keep a leveled head, I'm definitely being a consistent person and working my way to success!

What I'm taking on for preference is pretty much putting my best foot forward. I think by working hard at giving off a very strong and wonderful first impression, it gives me a bigger advantage of meeting more beautiful women. It then becomes about being able to work things out through differing personalities, and I guess that's where I get to find out about more of my sore spots and work at it, while breaking up with very pretty girls who I think have terrible personalities or are liars.

Being Center of Attention

I'm noticing for myself that I do like being the center of attention and getting it based off example. Yeah, I'm pretty decent with personality, but my actions are a little bit slow to perceiving and moving to doing the right thing.

I feel like I'm at a very vulnerable spot from writing about myself because if I was to become very angry and turned crazy then I could be admitting to doing some things that would be immoral. I think I'm going to work at being a more better person with a sense of style and continue to develop in the area of my health. I do have a job which is good for me.

I'm going to try to avoid experiences that have left me feeling worn out in the past for some purpose that didn't quite add up for me. For example, playing online poker for money left me feeling at a loss because I felt cheated out of my money when I worked so hard for a favorable position to gain the win. I don't really like the feeling, so I'm never going to do it again.

From also liking the idea of being the center of attention, I hate people poking and making fun of me so much in a negative way. I think others are like this also because I honestly do it to others too. I don't mean to do it often from trying to be nice, but I've done it on occasion. I guess it really doesn't matter then what people think so much about me. It only matters if I'm doing something so wrong that I would have to be placed charges for it.

Something About Myself

Man, I've been staying away from my worst sin for awhile now. I intend to keep it that way. I realize that I'm a very picky individual and have a hard time with figuring out things. Things just don't come so easy for me. I have to go out and work hard for it.

I know that I'm not really that crazy, but it feels like a few people think that way when I keep pursuing after something. I have just about the weirdest tastes in life and now I'm 31 years old. Well, it could be worse. I could still be acting a little bit like a kid at the age of 50.

From being so picky, I'm also a very different type of individual. When I go online, I'm thinking to myself that if I was to look for someone I like, then might as well go for someone I'm attracted to physically. When I do that, I don't seem to find that many. I also have room to believe that those individuals I'm attracted to wouldn't really be that into me anyway. I think I'm just going to read up on some dating and romance books to see if I can learn to maximize my chances with the relationships that I would like to attract.

Friday, January 9, 2015

Keeping My Cool

I've been learning something crazy about my faith in Jesus. It has been really changing my lifestyle around like completely upside down. Sure, I still sin like there's no yesterday, but those days feel like they are fleeing now.

I heard on the radio today that practically the gospel in a nutshell is believing upon how Jesus being God was sent down to die for our sins and will someday come back again. This makes me a Christian then because I fully believe upon him and for all that he did.

How this relates to keeping my cool is that by having this growing trust with the Lord, I feel like I don't really need to be messing around with the old stuff that actually brought me down. One of the things I heard on the radio is that by being fully honest, a lot of people will end up rejecting you. Yet, this is the type of person one should actually strive to be. However, to be able to have great friends, one really needs to make self-sacrifices and be upright.