Monday, September 22, 2014

Getting Back To Work

I really need to stop focusing on stuff that don't matter and work on stuff that do. I'm playing too much Magic The Gathering by myself. I was whooped for the last two days by my buddy after practicing for a whole month! I ended up changing my game plan around and switching to some faster cards to do the trick. Maybe that will solve my nagging problems of getting beat up early in the game and never recovering again.

Anyhow, I'm going to lay off with Magic The Gathering (MTG). MTG is only by far the most popular trading card game in the world! It also confuses a whole heck of a lot of interested people, so they never get even started. There's this YouTube video where this guy gets angry while playing a MTG match at a tournament and then flips the table around. A buddy said that it's so lame to look at it that it's pretty interesting to watch to see how the match turns out.

I'm pretty busy with my job and I guess I'm just venting about my problems right now. I'm going to get back again to working. I'm still waiting on my supervisor to get back to me, so I might as get busy studying my line of work again.

More Dauntless

I'm not really that intimidated with the thought of getting a restraining order from anyone now. It's the worst thing anyone could do to me to make me feel bad, but now I realize I don't care and that it's not that bad. I would get a chance to talk and make fun of the person in court for like one or two minutes and then the judge would cut me off while I'm laughing so hard in front of them.

It would constitute to having done my homework of preparing what to say so I would feel proud of myself for the next amount of time, I'm not supposed to talk to them. What I learned a secret from getting one from that stupid girl is if you totally break contact with the person and they have no knowledge of where you live now, then it becomes irrelevant to the court of extending the restraining order. I learned this from being lucky and not showing up at the court hearing. This may sound contradictory but it isn't; I wasn't lucky from not showing up at court with the first hearing because it was a dude who I really wanted to be stuck in a competitive boxing match with. I would knock him out really fast after cheating. Honestly, I wouldn't care about being held back!

This is all too common with angry women, but maybe an abused woman would get her way because of strong criminal evidence on the man.

Maybe Too Intense

I've actually been the king at writing messages while angry with people and then they just give up replying back with an angry message. I think deep down inside they want to think that I'm crazy, but have a hard time still with me.

What I think truly happened now is that they violated my own values and beliefs and really ticked me off to the point of flipping my handle. I was told that I consistently acted the same with these people and that I wouldn't stop being the same way with them. I've learned that doesn't mean I'm being crazy, but they tried other things to try to get the same result of getting me to stop and failed miserably! What the others did is technically the definition of being crazy. That's really nice to know now.

Headache From Laughter

Wow, the last couple posts had a 400% audience turnout from my average. It went from 2 readers to 8! 400% is a significant improvement. I'm starting to communicate a whole heck of a lot better and getting at a positive reaction from my buddies. I think I've had some good luck charm with some enemies, too. She might be so gay, literally! I think she's turning her side of thinking around or going the opposite orientation with liking men again. It's all because of my apathetic influence.

I'm actually laughing at my own humor so much from what I'm writing. I didn't know I could have this self-possessed and selfish humor to make myself gay with humility! I'm actually full-on into women by choice because I might be so dumb. Okay, there are some excellent women out there who could do some wonderful chores while the man could just lounge around on his sofa and watch some football. Another guy would probably chuck an empty can of beer from being angry at him, but the guy wouldn't do that to his pretty wife or girlfriend.

It's lovely that the most common thing for naturalism is a man and woman to be biologically attracted to one another. The real question that poses still a consideration for society is whether attraction to the same sex can be dealt with properly.

Friday, September 19, 2014

An Inconvenient Truth

I guess I get mad sometimes and very selfish because I just want to be a person who just has to let out some steam. I've learned even in my selfish moments how to channel the energy in a way to not get overly aggressive with friends and strangers I don't know. With people who have been giving me problems, I don't really feel the need to bother them. Of course, they are going to be complaining up a storm over silly stuff like not wanting to put me on Facebook and unblocking me again of all things. Oh my gosh!

I actually had a related restraining order from a stupid girl because of that. She looks like a twig and is so annoying! She was like do this and this or face her wraith of a restraining order! I didn't believe her so that was my funny mistake. I was really butt hurt for a long time, until I realized that she couldn't get it extended. The judge was like "Denied!" and panned his mallet in court. I wasn't there at the hearing of course, but that's how I imagine it. It was the maximum three year sentence. All I had to do was never make contact with her- fair enough, it was easy! I thought she was so lame and now I'm like messaging her again to put another one on me. She's been ignoring my messages these days and she's sort of looking like a loser in her own social circle.

She's like one of those thin girls who you want to say is hot but just isn't! Man, I can't believe a stupid girl like her got a Master's degree in clinical psychology of all things. She is so dumb and gosh, I don't even care if she wants to go for a restraining order that lasts a 100 years! I'm going to try my best to make fun of her and laugh and give it a performance that will be worth like 10 years all in front of the judge and the court audience, if she wants to go for another 3 years of a restraining order. She's like "I don't wanna talk about it" in her nagging voice! Well, she's going to have to talk about it in court or just be sitting there all angry while I give my five minute sermon about how she's a moron.

Might As Well Let Out My Problems

I read that the Asian culture, especially for a well-developed Asian country like South Korea, are now developing a suicidal mentality. That is pretty crazy because I thought it belonged only in Japan. The Japanese and Koreans haven't had too much of a loving history, where Japan was the aggressor thanks to the council of their Emperor trying to colonize a smaller and weaker country. Grrr, I feel it too! When the Koreans whoop the Japanese at sports like in the Olympics, it feels good and never gets old.

The Koreans have a history that pretty much sucked because they fought against each other and tried to have control of their smaller than average territory. Anyhow, how they have managed to fight back and now even have like an evil twin from the north, it's just amazing where it has led up too. I looked at the Korean Airlines on a map and it just skips right past North Korea and takes you to China that borders there.

I even saw this exciting show called the Deadliest Warrior, and they featured North Korea versus the U.S. Army Rangers. Being an American show, they gave a 2% edge to the Rangers and this was going to be a fight on the North Korean's turf. Looks like with their nuclear bombs, they might actually be somebody to be concerned about. They even had this blackmail thing going on with threatening to use nukes if they didn't get paid or any supplies. Anyhow, China responded by saying that the both countries are acting like silly brothers and should stop fighting one another.

Being Korean American, if I show up in South Korea I could be drafted into their army because I am of age. That's really nice to know!

Well, It's Friday Night

I'm actually just writing really fast, so I can focus at my job. I might as well just type anything to catch up as fast as I can, but it usually ends up with me creating a longer sentence like I am doing right now.

I'm probably just going to go with it and the flow. I just think it's really cool to have a routine going with this blog. Even though no one reads it or cares to comment on it, except for those people who put comments directing to their website, I'm cool with it man!

I think you really need to work a little to have some fun. It's great to reap the benefits of having fun, whether you are lucky to be born with it or not. I think when you have something people admire or desire for, then that's where the fun can begin.

Sunday, September 7, 2014

Taking Better Care Of Myself

I'm starting feel so motivated about working out and eating right, but the hard part I still have is being consistent with it all. I think what distracts me is television! I just turn it on then even though I'm bored to death or feeling moody about my past with idiots, I flip through channels and then occasionally I want to peak at something naughty on there!

This isn't the right thing to do and I think the best way to get around this is to just make the commitment to stop and do the best one could to be like that. It's all of these aggressive feelings that go against your brain waves, but if you are loyal and brave enough to hack through all of it, then you deserve to be a successful person with a beautiful and loving spouse! Otherwise, you are just a plain loser with silly pride that does nothing but pump you up and sometimes, just become depressed. One of my buddies have asked the question, what if "God made me this way?" I finally have the answer; if one is feeling unhappy about something, then it wasn't really meant to be that way by God and the person put it on himself because he's responsible for his own thoughts and actions. Maybe his thoughts have been driving him crazy and he can't come to terms with it- this isn't really God's doing but the person's fault from not working at it and it's actually something that could be laughed about with humor.

Living With Getting Rich and Healthy In Mind

I'm actually starting to become very lenient with spending my money now. It's not really crossing my mind so much in giving to others as well. Maybe, it's just because I felt like I had a really hard time while in college from not having the money to do things that would be cool. I grew up in a working class family where my mom denied buying me some things I really wanted as a child. Pouting didn't work and then after my mom lectured me on it like an annoying person, it made me stop asking for things.

I basically suffered all those years with not having stuff to do and from having been through it, I'm actually glad that I had the experience and can make peace with it. Surely, I was selfish and know that others out there are the same as well. I have my limits even though my threshold of keeping things together is pretty high these days. One of the signs that I see for myself is that I don't use curse words in front of others! I think others no matter how much of a jerk they are being with me keep me at a level of stability.

I had some trouble with people in the past and I'm glad those experiences helped me shape up into the better person I am today.

Decision With Poker

I'm actually pretty tired with poker and don't like how I put myself in a better edge to win and then someone else gets lucky. It feels like I'm a kid getting my candy taken from by a bully! Some professionals can take the beating quite well and then adjust themselves into a genius where they become the bully and play games with others. I guess that's entertaining and I'll leave it to them to put on a show for me, but I think I'll just play poker when I'm in the mood for having a little gambling fun with some theory and skill I've been developing. I guess I'll be playing mainly to get lucky and to just to have fun for a decent purpose in life. It would only be when I'm in the mood to socialize with these folks.

So basically I'm not addicted to this game because when I lose, I play less! That's pretty good to know for me. I have a better outlet then gambling on poker when I feel the need to expend some of this energy. It's also something that fits my personality of wanting to not do much thinking now. I would like to place my focus and energy on things that are meaningful and what I'm truly passionate about developing in. I think that's going to be my main focus, so it seems like I'm never going to do drugs!

Having A Clear Mind

I think the worst thing a person could do to me is put a restraining order on me. Maybe in a freaky occasion, someone will be about torturing and then murdering me, but at least I'll feel closer to being in heaven for some reason. Having a restraining order isn't even really that bad now that I think of it; you just have to do what it says and you are good to go in life. You get to realize how much free you really are; a crazy drawback is that you aren't licensed to have firearms during that time for personal use, so might as well get into law enforcement or the military if you can work your way around it. Maybe you can still rent a gun at a gun range to practice and shoot in case the person who put it on you is trying to get your head cut off! You can even take up archery and go hunting with a air rifle maybe, or even do some javelin throwing but this is once you reach a legal age and have that fear someone is coming after you.

I've been told that I'm a smart person and most recently, a smart lover by my girlfriend. I'm happy to know that. I think I've been dealing with a few idiots because they are just plain weird from how they were brought up, but it's all good now and I'm not that frustrated with them anymore. I want to keep it that way in the future so the focus is really on me and not them, if they end up going insane because of it.

Really Taking It Easy

From having a little spending money, it's really easy for me to get carried away and then toss around my money. Overall, I guess it's really just about figuring out what works best for a person. For myself, I really do a lot of careful thinking with what makes me tick. I don't get into the mode of feeding my addictions. I feel like that's being a person with low class.

Having a buddy with a minor level of intelligence and from being completely open and honest with me, it's been great to have a second hand to tell me what's appealing and isn't. I'm sort of trying a different thing where I'm asking another person for advice on what's hip and isn't. It's just because I'm a pretty open person and a lot of things don't really get to me that easy.

I do have some temporary exchanges of personal emotions where I'll get a little mad about things, but other than that I'm not really all that into staying angry and will do my best to get those things taken cared for. I guess when it comes to people relations with those who are bad with me, it's not really about making the other person happy but more about keeping myself from getting too cranky! I, therefore, talk to them about how they can solve their issue with me and just be straight up with how I'm feeling about them; it's very important for me to not feel any hostility with them before I go after resolving something. I think that was a main worry for a few of my friends because they asked me to back off from them, knowing that I'm capable of worsening a situation.  

Thursday, September 4, 2014

Reaching Goals But Impatient About It

It seems like all the hard work you put into it has been fine and dandy but when the opportunity feels creeping around the corner, it gets pretty hard to wait on it to happen while you are doing something. It's like losing focus because you are so interested in obtaining something that you forget for a little bit what you are trying to achieve. This happens to me quite a bit with a lot of things I'm trying to achieve. I guess I'm smart enough to keep a decent work ethic, but every once in awhile when I feel like reaching a milestone, I just choke!

It's like sometimes you need that luck of being successful to keep something going and to feel emotionally satisfied over it. It's like playing a game of poker dealing with money. You play more when you feel like a winner and play less when you lose and have no more money! I'm starting to realize the possibilities of achieving my goals from a basic level. It's like I'm creating my own foundation again to get there in life!

A Few Little Things To Feel Complete

I'm doing a lot of fast paced activity to feel satisfied with my life of being a swing shift-er. What I mean by that is I work the second shift until late at night- the most I've gone up to is 3 am. I also did graveyard shift, which was actually quite fun but it was difficult to get rest during the day time. I was so tired all the time and then how my time gets shifted around all of a sudden, it made me even more tired. I was even falling asleep while standing up at work!

Those days after I think of a year or two have now passed and I'm a lot better with maintaining the discipline to stay awake. It's quite funny because all it requires is just alerting your mind to stay awake. It's like inserting yourself forcefully with the alpha waves of your brain cycle. I imagine it to be like drinking cold water imaginatively. Whenever you are tired and you have an ice cold drink of water, it feels like you have to be momentarily awake. I taught myself to do this whenever I am tired and need to stay awake, but I keep on doing it whenever I feel tired every five minutes or however instantaneously I need it. It's saved me from crashing my vehicle while driving on the side of the curb!

Doing Little Things While Tired

I'm noticing that with my mind going off with doing things that don't really have that much significance, I am losing a lot of valuable time. It sounds depressing that I'm aware of this situation and with how other things that feel like invading my mind, it's so easy to flip out all of a sudden! Nonetheless, I think a girl can feel like this sometimes a whole lot more than for a guy. It must be the biological makeup of the brain chemicals with the two genders. It's still interesting though to read and view some relationships regarding a guy and girl. Well, a romantic comedy/drama can sell pretty well to the mass even if the actors aren't that good looking or popular!

Anyhow, back to my topic, I realize that it's easy for me to chain off to a completely new topic after introducing it with a sentence. I'm doing this through my writing now and it hasn't really been tested out with an audience. I think my writing ability has given me at the best consistent level of an A- grade. Of course, I want to do get an A+ all the time! I had one professor hang on to a work and he gave me an A+ for the research I did. I don't recall what I put on that paper. It was mainly just cut and paste and rewording the research I did while using a short term and focused memory. I didn't really get anything excess out of that- I think I just invented a nice approach as a routine and that particular paper just happened to catch the professor's interest. He kept the report and I deleted it from my computer files!


Just Random Posting

I am still trying to catch up as best as possible. I feel really fat right now because I am sort of sick with a cold and want to work out while taking good care of myself. I guess I have to let it run its course, but eventually I'm going to have this good routine down.

Since I have a girlfriend now, I want to limit my attentions to her more better than going off in my own world. I'm going to try to prioritize and take really good care of myself, so I could just be there for her when she needs me. It seems like everything has connected a little better in my life from having met a love.

Continuing To Strive

Last night was a not so busy day at work, but nonetheless I tried to stay focused at it. A quote I just read today says that the best way to have a fulfilled day is to have activities and to do all of your objectives well and completely. I'm starting to now realize the possibility of me manning up now with a girlfriend!

It's very fulfilling in a way to have someone to share a lovely and meaningful life with. I still need to make a few more additions along the way, but I think I'll make it there eventually. Today, I am called in to go to work a little earlier. I guess maybe there's not that much work or I might be a little more valued for the company because I work with another guy.


Wednesday, September 3, 2014

A Few Things I Could Continue To Fix

I realize that with my brain chemicals craving for some pleasure, it accounts for my private mischief. I do it so often behind closed doors and in the closet. I'm pretty much like that because I think there's a point to feel bad about it and not to let out to the whole world.

What I feel is that I think others are going to treat me like how I would treat them. The way I treat others is that I don't really pay attention to them that much. I also try to be condoning as much as possible too. Putting aside my angry considerations, I'm starting to focus more on making myself happy by going after solving those situations that just bug me.

I think it's just like lighting a candle or flipping on the switch. Sure, the world can become a place where I run out of breath and have to slow down, but I'm going on a journey and trying to improve myself better than I was before.

Have To Stay On Track

I'm starting to think that instead of writing and listing out my goals, I think the better practice would be to learn to think on my feet. I guess when it comes to managing appointments, if they get so much to handle then maybe I should buy an organizer to keep myself from getting lost keeping track of everything and to have a useful reference for an alibi in case I need it in a legal setting.

That being said I'm not really going to put down much on this blog with my personal, but I can very well say that I'm learning to manage it decently right now.

Day 246

I did a little searching on Google and noticed that today's day of the year is 246! That's pretty neat how someone already came up with that through generated software. I'm sure there's some formula as well to count the days, but I didn't feel like sitting there to figure that out. Anyhow, I'm still behind by about a month and a half to get up to date with all these blog posts.

I guess it's just a personal fun thing to do for myself. I still notice that I'm getting a very minimal amount of traffic on here. I guess it's really cool that one or two people find my writing interesting enough to look at wherever I'm at in my course of life. That's the only amount of verification I can track on this site, but the one that keeps track of visitors says that I'm getting more sometimes. It seems like there's a positive association with visitors in that the more interesting posts I make, the more readers I attract. I don't really get anybody to comment on my site, so I'm used to very quiet responses from others. These days I'm getting responses from people in person and I've actually learned to deal with it properly. I guess the only ones I'm probably not going to get too many responses from are the ones who are actually pretty weird!

Looks Nice to the Eyes

I think this blog might look beautiful with a bunch of just text and it's like so individualistic that you don't even have to read it. I guess in that respect it might seem a little weird that I'm getting a blog going just to post my thoughts and brag about how happy I am online!

One of my closest friends isn't that great of a reader. I'm not even that great of an avid reader either, but I don't know why I'm spending my days just writing on here online. I guess I'm just practicing with just being eloquent. Maybe, I'll be in a situation someday where I could genuinely care for people and try to solve a situation comfortably. I still have to work my way there though and maybe the issues I have right now just don't really matter right now.

Doing Everything Fast Paced

I realize that my personality likes to do things fast and have fun with it at the same. I'm having a pretty decent time with it these days. I guess I'm trying to stay on top of things without getting myself really hurt.

I don't really feel like writing much now, so I'm going to just leave it alone for now. This probably is the shortest two paragraphs that I am writing and leaving alone for the past couple months!

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Careful Not To Show Off

Since I actually have a legit girlfriend now, I'm going to work out and try to get some six pack abs and take better care of myself. I want to manage my lifestyle a whole lot better and sort of develop this awesome persona with energy that just goes all into being with my future wife. I posted something related to this on my Facebook page and then I was met with some skepticism by another female friend! Another female friend was happy for me, though.

I need to be careful what I post because I don't want to end up swallowing my own words. I really hate doing that. I don't like losing my cool either and then making annoying comments about people in front of their faces. It makes me feel bad for doing that. They are some weak scoundrels but it's no excuse for my smart brain that can handle the stress and figure out a solution to the problem. As long as there's people involved and I have interacted with them, I can manage to find a way to resolve the issue for my own happiness. For some reason, it's based off of people feeling good about themselves too. I just can't live like being a moron to others; it doesn't click very well for me.

Getting On With It

I have like about ten minutes to spare. I'm realizing that the sound of my piano really sucks. I need to get it tuned or upgrade it to a better sounding instrument. I'm suffering because my parents tell me that the music is horrible. I played my song I wrote on a better sounding and well-tuned piano by myself. A group of my buddies came into the sound room and beckoned me to keep playing. I just kept playing like it was no big deal and then one of them ended up recording me on his phone. He showed it to almost everybody and for the most part, the majority of them were impressed and came up to tell me about it.

I think a well-tuned instrument sound plays a large role to putting on a good concert. If it's all cranky and sounds horrific and out of tune, there's just no well to go professional with that. You might as well just go for being broke. I think I'm going to try to invest my time with finding a good keyboard, even if it's expensive so I could find some space to deal with it. Eventually though, I want to become a proud owner of a grand piano and have fun playing all the good classics that I just become excited over.

Concentration Efforts

I did a little looking up to see if I had any ADD (attention deficit disorder). I remember a female friend of mine who is a little irritating and senseless telling me that I need to look up ADD. I wonder if she was commenting on how I might have that mental problem. Actually, now that I think of it; there's another crazy girl I was cool with in the beginning; she mentioned to me with having ADD. I never really thought that would turn into a factor, but I think because of it and how I went against her boyfriend, she's no longer interested in being friends with me.

I took the test and basically answered with "sometimes" as my answer of a few of them and otherwise, I put down "never". Like why would I lose focus if I'm having so much fun with my video games and making money? It doesn't make any sense at all. I sometimes lose focus when I'm dealing with boring stuff. I guess it's just disciplining myself as a requirement then to handle all of that stupid and boring stuff.

Exercising Discipline

I'm actually focusing on the big picture right now which is setting myself up for doing what I want to do for making a living. What I'm currently doing is so much fun and exciting and I truly enjoy it. I don't mind the setbacks that come with it that much too.

I'm going to try to limit the stuff that interests me and try to specialize on things that I want to stay consistent with and to earn a decent living with. I guess I'm pretty good on this goal of making money for myself. I'm now trying to dish in on a more healthy lifestyle.

Having Fun

So I downloaded this game called America's Army and it's pretty fun to play. It sort of gives a good idea on how to work as a team within a unit and do some tactics and strategies. I just go off and on and go for heroics in the game, which is a pretty bad idea to think of, but anyway it's still fun.

I sort of like how it gets me feeling in those simulated tight corners and an idea of how to approach it without knowing anything. I think it would be better for me to research on war tactics and then try to apply them later on. For now, I'm just trying to move alone with my career.

Monday, September 1, 2014

One More Before Breaking

Maybe, I'll be up on here at 1 am again. I don't know, but I doubt it. I might be enjoying my video games again even though I say I'm going to stop wasting my time with them. I'm a thirty-one year old still getting the fun buzz over playing games. Yeah, that's pretty old considering the audience I figure to be reading those posts.

I think being upfront like that is nice at my own personal expense because it gives a sense of non-hostile environment and something good to laugh about before reflecting on serious matters again, which people really have problems and issues over. I think my style is not meant to be really challenged aggressively or from a mean standpoint or else it will just make you feel weird to begin with.

That's probably why I'm not really stood up to that often. I actually think now that if I really put in the time and effort then I could have solved my problem with idiots back in the day. I can do it now, I suppose and I think I'll just keep my head up high with confidence.

Anything Now

I'm really taking a little bit of my time right now to write anything that's on my mind now. I'm pretty much locked in from having committed myself to put something on this blog. I think that's where the magic might happen for me. It's when I really decide to put forth a consistent effort then I'm able to experience the fruits of the labor and not really mind the hardships I went through in the past.

I have this initial start-up fear of doing stuff sometimes and get overwhelmed to try new things. I don't think I should really let them debilitate me. I think bravery for me is just being upfront about a lot of stuff. Not a lot of people try that hard, so standing out might be a pain because I don't want to work that hard too. I guess it comes down to knowing what you want and having pride over some things that actually count in life.

Doing Everything On My Own

Obviously, you can't hire someone to do the work outs for you so your body becomes ripped. Likewise, it seems to feel like that when it comes to investing. It's definitely better to know what you are doing and be the one to make the comfortable decisions and do what you want to be doing.

From doing my reading, there seems to be many reigning ideas and what works best for me is the lazy and clean method instead of trying to gun for profits on a daily basis with a Type A personality-like disorder. It becomes like another 8 to 5 job which isn't what I have in mind doing for the rest of my life, no matter how good the pay is. If it's fun, then maybe I'll consider but I don't the fun might turn old and stale for me after awhile. I want to be free to adventure and roam other places. This girl I hardly know on Facebook ended up using her savings to go travel and now she's back in college mode. She's pretty funny and I like to think that she's my type but frankly, she might not be that intelligent as I would have liked.

Anyhow, I post funny stuff on her posts that make me laugh a whole lot and then I have to focus on my job after while eliminating those distracting thoughts. It's pretty hard to do, but not unbearable for me. I'm still trying to maintain a long-standing composure while being very content in life which is something that I haven't been able to establish yet. I think my answer to those problems is to live through those struggles while depending on God for support.

Happy Labor's Day

I guess I have the sense like the rest of the people on the planet who live in America and work with a pretty, decent working brain to know today is Labor's Day. I don't feel anything special over it right now. What I do want to do, however, is work out and exercise discipline now.

For disciplining myself, I'm going to try to avoid some things. I really do want to earn a lot of money comfortably and that's where I'm currently working at. I also want to have a sexy body, despite being short and having some pimple scars! I've been told that I'm pretty good looking with glasses, so yeah, I think some people just get carried away with their agenda that they don't care about another person's looks for the time being.

Sirens Don't Bother Me Now

I think I managed to get it emotionally under control now in that I don't have to feel paranoid when I hear the paramedics approach my house. It was like this daunting reminder that I had to be scared for my life because the law was out to get me for my secret acts inside my own closet.

Hey, I think there's some privacy laws intact too, so I guess I don't want to even be in the negative spotlight and that could very well be the reason why I feel so paranoid about getting caught. I never really did think it was cool to do drugs, so I never did them illegally. I don't see the point of relying on a dead plant to give you a high after lighting it up.

Where I get my high is from looking at things visually and after being tempted, I have this strong Christian belief of waiting to be married, so yeah, I never hit any home runs despite being given those offerings about five times now in my entire life. Maybe, they weren't hot enough for me; I don't know, I seem to find flaws even in the most beautiful person on the Earth, like ummmm, Cindy Crawford. She's a pretty old mom, despite having flawless looking skin.

Interesting Time To Post

I'm posting like at 1:30 in the morning. Well, it's Labor's Day so I guess it's okay to be up this late doing nothing! I'm finding that people don't really appreciate jokes that much as they do with people who are just associated with success or beauty. I guess those are the qualities that attract people more than just being funny and interestingly different.

I was told by a buddy of mine that I don't really follow the pack too often and it's true, I don't. Seriously, now I'm taking the approach of solving the problem and not anything else. Oh yeah, I need to wash my car. Man, I'm getting so ignorant because my mind is feeling so stoic now. It's like I don't really have that much emotional attachment to things anymore that I could really do something boring for the rest of my life, like working at a company that makes me the big bucks!

I still get a emotional buzz from communicating with my girlfriend right now. Yeah, I think I can say for reals that I do have a girlfriend or another significant other. We're dealing with a distant relationship right now but we do communicate via writing. Go figure, a man who used to have some anger issues, told me that my writing sucks and it's going to get me nowhere in life and that I should stop it. I think he was approaching it from the wrong angle. He was just mad because he wasn't able to control me and he felt that he was so right. Without the need of tackling him to the floor and screaming at his face and then apologizing and then repeating the process over again repetitively, I think the solution is to really reveal where he's being faulty and laugh about it underneath while showing some genuine sympathy of how he's going through a hard time and just be upfront about things.

With This Whole Posting

Last year I think it was, I ended up posting around 100 of these in a two month span and probably averaged 20 in one day! I don't really want to repeat that again, so I am definitely going to try to do the five a day approach. Like having five fruits and vegetables a day and getting at least 5 minutes of sleep a day in for the rest of my own entire existence! That's easy said and done for me- I still remember this one female friend whose now engaged to a pretty chubby guy commenting on how she feels weird from having insomnia.

She is ultra skinny by the way so I guess there's a saying that opposites might attract. Hey, I went out on a few unofficial dates with her over a few months so she thought it would be a good thing to go after me in a relationship. I was so clueless to how attractive she really is- she's just not really my type I guess. She just doesn't have that one giving attitude where I look for the most, and I'm sure other guys might be able to relate to it.

Catching Up

I'm going to try to post like five a day now. I'm just going to randomly post anything that's on my mind to try to catch up. I remember for the past couple years, I've been putting it off the last minute and I don't find that to be very comfortable for me now. I guess I felt like I had to prove something by doing other meaningless stuff before putting my time into getting the important parts done. Man, I was stupid!

Some days, it's really nice to post photos on this site and write stuff pertaining to the visual while trying to make good, clean jokes at the same time. I am definitely a real person blogging on this site with a personality that sort of likes to be a goody-two-shoe and out of trouble. I am a dude who prefers not to spat out curse words and think negatively towards others, no matter what jam I'm going through.

The trick has to have a positive association of being realistic and imagining resolving solutions. The focus is really not on how bad the person is because that's just a waste of time and puts you in a more, angrier predicament. It's really about fixing the problem while focusing on it with the imagination and having a strong spirit over it. It's like living through adversity and making proper adjustments.

I Want To Get A Six Pac

Nowadays, I figure that if I'm going to end up with a killer body, there's two ways to go about it: get surgery or do it the traditional hard way through proper nutrition and diet, exercise, and rest. I wouldn't feel right about getting surgery because I might still be carrying some unhealthy habits afterwards. The traditional way seems to be the best because of the discipline that it requires and how that could carry over with other intense activities.

I'm starting to think that maybe there is a way around a lot of my issues. One of my reasons for wanting to get a 6-PAC on my abs, not a six-pack of beer, is that it looks like I finally have a legitimate girlfriend! She's about four inches taller than me- so I'm going to try to stretch out my bones a little more and see if I could tone that down to just two inches.

Hey, if a short guy like me could do it then not everybody can do it because I sort of have an intelligent mind. I think intelligence mixed with a little bit of charismatic strength while any size will do the trick. There was this one actor who stood only three feet tall and he's married to a beautiful woman! Man, that's really standing up to the plate and getting it done.

Okay, so height doesn't matter and it feels that way only if I'm in a happy mood. I have some buddies making fun of my height which is hilarious. It's all good, and I don't really care now. I think some people still have like a short height phobia or just feel weird about being in a relationship with one because it's just plain different and others might give off this influence of how you have to follow the pack. For some reason, tallness does have this innate sense of attractiveness and emotional sense of security. What it really comes down to in the long run is really the quality of the person's heart, not their sensual body parts!

Behind Schedule

It looks like I'm spending so much way less time on this blog now. I guess I'm a lot better equipped at being an upfront person. Actually, it doesn't really matter how I go about it, as long as I'm a happy and positive person, I can manage almost anything with people. I'm going to try to keep that upbeat heart wherever I go in life now.

Basically, I used to think how some people were just making me angry from having a bad personality. Now, I don't even think that way about them. The way I see it is that it's really about managing my own personal feelings and then resolving the problem by looking at taking care of it.