Monday, September 29, 2014

Writing It Down And Doing It

I'm not really satisfied with how I keep forgetting to do some things from getting carried away with like watching T.V. and playing card games on my computer online with random folks. I'm going to try to limit those activities and focus on my own personal growth. I guess having a really pretty girlfriend who is sweet too would be nice, but I'm starting to view physical beauty even in females who might not be that appealing to others.

Two of my buddies were talking to me and one of them said he wouldn't care if the hot girl he dated was very bad to him; he would let her walk all over him, and he would do almost anything for her. I was like he's still being dumb and never got over his issues, and it irritated me so much. Another buddy mentioned that his one date he found on had some weight issue; that's all he ever mentioned. Wow, he's a good friend and really nice to hang out with, but man, all he can talk about with getting girls is just how pretty he wants them to be. I just don't see it like this. I too was worried about my girlfriend turning out pretty ugly but she's actually not! I'm pretty happy and okay to know that she's taller than me too now. I'm a little more secure about myself now and not going to mind mad-dogging the people who make height jokes about me!

Using a Site to Analyze Trades

I'm using to analyze and pick my stock and currency choices. By logging in with your google account, it lets you set up and personalize your own stock portfolio. It does a good job at summarizing the information in a column. Therefore, it takes me only a few minutes to figure out which ones I'm interested in.

I think I'm going to start sharing what's working for me and isn't. There's also great risk involved no matter how much money I could be making. If anyone really has the guts to trade along with me, then I would seriously appreciate their feedback. I'm basically going to open up for free on this site. Nothing comes for free literally, the reader has to sit there to read through some of my potentially confusing posts as well, so I think I'm in clear waters to share all my individualist thoughts on this blog.

I think by being honest, I actually make sense for others to catch on to and to pretty much not try screw me over because I'm going to give my own effort, and they might be scared about ending up feeling bad about it, so they won't do anything to me except maybe gossip about me at the worst.

I'm pretty much just an amateur playing in pee-wee ball when it comes to investing. I've done some huge trades that exceeded $5,000 a few times and lost them but I've never gone over $20,000 in my trading account. That's probably the amount of money I've traded so far. Therefore, I have a little experience and I'm picking up on some long term trading which I'm favoring along with trading on the trend for short term as well.

How It's Coming Along

Trading stocks is very risky business, and I think learning that edge and trying to teach it also becomes a challenge for others to catch onto. I guess being an expert at something and being able to pass on the knowledge to worthy people who get it free while being paid by someone else is great! I'm going to assume that whoever picks up something good from this blog deserves it, so I'm going to open up my analysis and be totally honest about my results. I don't think I'm going to be that good, so I don't expect any good turnout or feedback from me doing my thing on here.

I've had success in the beginning from hiring a trading manager, where I made about $10,000 profit with a starting capital of $2,000. It was not that bad. He then started doing bad, so I bailed. I then tried again with another guy and the same result happened. I did it a third time and so on and it keeps giving me the same result. Therefore, my conclusion is that those professional financial traders are not going to stay that serious and probably become more prideful in their abilities and take bigger risks as they perform better.

I've been working on honing my own skills, so I think the best way to be in this business is to trade your own funds and once you reach a certain number like a $1 million on doing your own trades then you don't really need to rely on anyone else to do the trading for you. It doesn't really hurt to invest in other people's businesses though to make a little extra money for something you have faith in. I guess at the age of 31, I'm starting to trade with an acceptable amount of money to learn to get into the bigger leagues. It's not playing at a $1/$2 blinds in a poker table with a buy-in of about $40-$200 at a time. I think ranging my trades in those areas would give me plenty of room to explore and hone in my own skills.

Opening Myself Up

I feel like an idiot from surfing the web for useless information to pump myself up. A dumb girl in the past who was probably irritated with me and had trouble communicating her feelings with me told me that knowledge puffs you up. Okay, that was a stupid comment she made and I had to just write it down on this blog.

A dumb pastor said in one of his sermons I was very unlucky to attend and listen to that comparing yourself to others makes you unhappy. I'm sure for him that it really would! He's not a very influential guy and pretty dumb because he let that stupid girl who put a restraining order on me make some decisions for him. Oh well, I'm just teasing him online and laughing it off so I won't be so mad at him anymore.

I don't really think looking at girls is very worthwhile either now. It's not giving me that same excitement I had when I was a teenager. I guess I just feel the stupidity of growing up with it and continuing the quest that has absolutely no significance. Therefore, dealing with that stuff now I'm out!

It's all a waste of time from being a useless load of time spent. I'm going to focus on educating myself and being a self-motivator and doing stuff I want to do. I'm also taking some time off from my closest buddy because I'm pretty irritated by his comments.

Doing Everything On My Own

I was pretty much given advice to trade $5000 with Apple while doing options. I'm about to lose that much for real! On the bright side, I still have money. Well, it makes me a little mad I took advice from someone because I normally wouldn't have done that. At least, I still have enough to support myself for now. I made a costly mistake which is bad for business if I keep repeating that pattern.

I thought it was going to be easy, but it looks like nothing really is and the unlikely thing that happened on the news is that the new Apple 6 products experienced some bugs and user dissatisfaction. Therefore, their shares have dropped below their expected price. I'm about to lose that much, but I still have enough to spend on other stuff and to financially support a girlfriend. The only good thing is that I didn't put on my money on that trade alone, which is good and I learned a valuable lesson! 

Friday, September 26, 2014

Okay, Gotta Just Breathe

So that stupid man got his way with a less-than good quality lady. Okay, I can live with that. The girl he dated next wasn't all that but it looks like she had some decency and sort of liked me still as a friend. She has some image issues from looking a little off, but she gets it better than me. She broke up with the guy after I told her he was once married. That was revenge for the stupid guy putting a restraining order on me!

He's like all dazed and confused around me now. He had the nerve to show up to parties I was at, while I wanted to pop him all over his body. Okay, now after making him of fun now I feel better about making up with him. He's probably like no way and to get away from him. I would be like go ahead and go for another restraining order that he failed to get extended!

He would probably just smile it off and turn around and then feel moody again about his life feeling so rotten. He's literally the jerk in what's called the jerk circle. It's where people just get lazy and start talking about gossip and start whispering, "Hey, don't let that guy know I know that he..." I was once his friend, but not anymore. I can handle being his friend again though, but I might really have aggressive periods of just making fun of him.

A Stupid Man

Okay, this stupid guy ended up with a super, smoking hot wife. He then ended up cheating on her while they were in a relationship with a less good-looking woman, and I even called him my friend at one point. Actually, that's not the real reason why I feel mad. He called me a terrorist and put a non-domestic related restraining order on me like that stupid girl did too. Basically, I had two from two different stupid individuals.

For the third time to go through though, it's been scaring a whole heck of a lot of crazy people who want to put one on me. They know those people failed to get what they want and are crazy- those people just don't know how crazy they are yet! I haven't had a third one ever since communicating how they couldn't get it extended and how I met them face-to-face after. Those people are a bunch of idiots! They blow their cover, and I know how they are going to react with me.

Luckily, I realize that I have a selfish sense-of-humor to keep myself from staying mad and can utilize it to stay professional, hard working, and nice to others most of the time. It's something that occurs naturally for me now and doesn't take me that much effort now. I expect those crazy and weird idiots are going to shutdown with me now in the future and not going to be able to do much while being depressed when I end up cornering them or something and then make fun of them while I'm mad just to get it off my chest and then go after being nice to them again just to look like I'm better than them.

Posting To Relieve My Frustrations

I'm realizing that having this blog has been very therapeutic for me in keeping me at bay. I've been opting to be an honest and professional person. Sometimes, I go off in a crazy direction to others and they want to also go nuts as well, but the good friends are able to keep themselves in check very well!

I'm becoming someone with a successful mindset more each passing day. I also like to be giving whenever it feels appropriate. Sometimes, it feels annoying when that gets brought up to me. Basically, at my work right now. I'm just going through the motions of reading and studying CMM material. The CMM I am talking about is basically called coordinate measuring machine. It has sensors that tell the computer wherever it's at on 3-D axis, so it basically uses X,Y, and Z. It can also use a more confusing three-dimensional form called polar coordinates, which is basically positioning itself while using the angle and radius of a sphere.

It really tests the limits of your brain and envisioning of moving the parts in your head while looking at a blueprint. The blueprint can't show you all the possible views, out of having to keep it in budget but gives you enough to work with. For someone like my buddy who hates to read and isn't very smart, he's going to have a hard time and just communicate something that he feels is right just to be thinking he's like someone important. It's a little irritating actually! He then ends up denying it as well, just to downplay the situation and keep himself from feeling bad. I guess I know my buddy really well now to be able to talk about these minor details about him.

Very Fortunate To Have A Job

I feel really lucky to have the opportunity to work in the aerospace industry inspecting parts while programming very expensive measuring equipment to do the job. My college background is in Computer Science and I completed the 4-year program while also doing a minor in Mathematics. I guess that's why I come across as so smart to an average person sometimes.

I was really demotivated for the longest time in looking for a job after though. I applied to some jobs, and I just wouldn't fit the qualifications they were looking for. I told my mom, but she was not very understanding with me for the longest time. She would now tick me off of course, if she still acted the same way. I now have something to combat my own anger issues. It's my own selfish sense of humor. I need it so the sun won't go down, while I'm still angry. The Bible also mentions something like how having a cheerful heart helps cure the woes of a depressed person. From laughing really hard in my head, it helps me relax and be cordial and professional to others, but I have to say the mean comments that others have to hear, so they can laugh too if they want to or not if it isn't appropriate. Obviously, probably 90% of the time, a person isn't going to laugh when I am personally making fun of him but the majority listening do get a kick out of it sometimes.

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Work is Awesome

I'm just typing away at my computer so I can relieve myself of some distractions. I have a list of the things on paper I aspire to enjoy folded up and in my wallet. I'm really trying to find some work to do to keep myself busy while trying to get cured of my video gaming addiction. I like to have fun, so I'm addicted to those playful card games like Magic: The Gathering! I think I need to let go of that silly stuff for now and focus on the bigger picture because it's just kid stuff. It's making me feel embarrassed just writing about it.

There are bigger rewards to aspire for rather than limiting yourself to not so appealing qualities when dealing with others. I was like an angry bird that would hover over its enemy and then wait to drop a bathroom break on them! It's not about how it's not being nice but more about keeping my own sanity alive and still being a loving human even if it feels like those sensitive emotions are fleeting away now.

Laughing It Off to Cure the Angry Bug

There it is, one of my longest title of the month so far. I'll try not to top it with another interesting post that has a longer title. Have to always go bigger the next time because it's more fascinating like the husband giving his wife a bigger diamond on her ring every few years for anniversary!

The technique I adopted naturally on the fly with that stupid girl who put a non-domestic violence related restraining order on me is controlling the anger by just laughing it off with the funniest things you could write to satisfy yourself. After messaging something I don't remember now to that girl after she failed to get it extended at court, I just remember feeling really good from having laughed so hard and then I just deleted the sent messages because she isn't responding back to me. I feel really satisfied and on a happy mode, but she's probably really upset with me. If it's one or the other, I'd rather have it her be unhappy and I'll take the positive end.

It's an interesting technique besides going on a Roid rage which I am capable of doing from looking like a big, intimidating man even though I'm only 5'3". I'm considered to be super smart by a slightly average person, so they get scared of me! I know the process of a person's emotions now. They just get irritated, turn a little crazy and then after bumping heads and elbows with them mentally speaking, they start complying. Actually, I think they would just shut down but I think I've actually been decent enough to watch out for myself by just saying stuff to laugh it off when they are ticking me off after yelling or being verbally hostile with me. When I'm extremely laughing it off and making sense to my self in a way that makes me satisfied, it seems to be also contagious to others. I think that's a good way to let go of anger with people by just expressing yourself in a way that would just make you laugh so hard about it later. Basically, it's making fun of the punk who is yelling at you and still making more fake friends on Facebook than you.

Interesting Posts Again?

Wow, I again received a 30% increase of a reading audience. I went from 8 views to 11! That is most excellent. However, one post turned out to be probably very stupid to read and it only managed two posts which is my loyal readers. Maybe, they like me which is cool.

Yeah, I read back through my posts and I actually enjoyed what I wrote there. I wasn't in any pain of recollection whatsoever. I'll start another post to talk about a technique that I am trying and might lead to a better and more happier life.  

Free Write

I've noticed that I have amassed a pretty decent level of typing talent. I can just use a natural home keyboard and type up a storm in a matter of minutes! That reminds me, my old neighbor called me awhile ago to fix her computer. I feel like a brute from having forgotten all about her. She pays me whenever I am there like 60 bucks. I feel bad about taking the money, but I just take it and she gives me great food! I guess I'm a man who stays constantly busy about the most unimportant things in my own head.

I need to really fix myself up as a person man! I'm going to be taking on a pretty hot girlfriend too. I mean literally, we have been exchanging a conservation between ourselves via e-mail. We are looking to start dating and she's a pretty hot tamale! Wow, she's even taller than me and totally from a different part of the world. I guess I get a little cocky sometimes about wanting the best quality and when I get it, I tend to overlook its values sometimes.

I don't think I'm all that great looking, but those photos are what drove my other buddies to honestly tell me that's a good looking pic of me. I look really tall in my photos and pretty big even though I am short. I'm only 5'3" and weigh in about 165 pounds while running two miles in under 14 minutes. I'm totally serious, I can hack a mile in about 6:30 while running at a constant pace and not getting that tired. That's not even my best effort I'm putting forth! I never tried yet because I'm afraid of my legs falling off.

Maybe from being a short man and having slightly better than average qualities that out does a taller man, I get to contribute to the gene pool as well. Maybe being short isn't such a depressing quality that some people like me has felt. My appearance surely does though affect getting some likes on my Facebook, but honestly, it doesn't really matter and I think I just bum some people out from being such a goody two shoe or coming across so nice which I like to be even when I'm so angry at people and trying to calm down and them not liking me as a person.

Monday, September 22, 2014

Getting Back To Work

I really need to stop focusing on stuff that don't matter and work on stuff that do. I'm playing too much Magic The Gathering by myself. I was whooped for the last two days by my buddy after practicing for a whole month! I ended up changing my game plan around and switching to some faster cards to do the trick. Maybe that will solve my nagging problems of getting beat up early in the game and never recovering again.

Anyhow, I'm going to lay off with Magic The Gathering (MTG). MTG is only by far the most popular trading card game in the world! It also confuses a whole heck of a lot of interested people, so they never get even started. There's this YouTube video where this guy gets angry while playing a MTG match at a tournament and then flips the table around. A buddy said that it's so lame to look at it that it's pretty interesting to watch to see how the match turns out.

I'm pretty busy with my job and I guess I'm just venting about my problems right now. I'm going to get back again to working. I'm still waiting on my supervisor to get back to me, so I might as get busy studying my line of work again.

More Dauntless

I'm not really that intimidated with the thought of getting a restraining order from anyone now. It's the worst thing anyone could do to me to make me feel bad, but now I realize I don't care and that it's not that bad. I would get a chance to talk and make fun of the person in court for like one or two minutes and then the judge would cut me off while I'm laughing so hard in front of them.

It would constitute to having done my homework of preparing what to say so I would feel proud of myself for the next amount of time, I'm not supposed to talk to them. What I learned a secret from getting one from that stupid girl is if you totally break contact with the person and they have no knowledge of where you live now, then it becomes irrelevant to the court of extending the restraining order. I learned this from being lucky and not showing up at the court hearing. This may sound contradictory but it isn't; I wasn't lucky from not showing up at court with the first hearing because it was a dude who I really wanted to be stuck in a competitive boxing match with. I would knock him out really fast after cheating. Honestly, I wouldn't care about being held back!

This is all too common with angry women, but maybe an abused woman would get her way because of strong criminal evidence on the man.

Maybe Too Intense

I've actually been the king at writing messages while angry with people and then they just give up replying back with an angry message. I think deep down inside they want to think that I'm crazy, but have a hard time still with me.

What I think truly happened now is that they violated my own values and beliefs and really ticked me off to the point of flipping my handle. I was told that I consistently acted the same with these people and that I wouldn't stop being the same way with them. I've learned that doesn't mean I'm being crazy, but they tried other things to try to get the same result of getting me to stop and failed miserably! What the others did is technically the definition of being crazy. That's really nice to know now.

Headache From Laughter

Wow, the last couple posts had a 400% audience turnout from my average. It went from 2 readers to 8! 400% is a significant improvement. I'm starting to communicate a whole heck of a lot better and getting at a positive reaction from my buddies. I think I've had some good luck charm with some enemies, too. She might be so gay, literally! I think she's turning her side of thinking around or going the opposite orientation with liking men again. It's all because of my apathetic influence.

I'm actually laughing at my own humor so much from what I'm writing. I didn't know I could have this self-possessed and selfish humor to make myself gay with humility! I'm actually full-on into women by choice because I might be so dumb. Okay, there are some excellent women out there who could do some wonderful chores while the man could just lounge around on his sofa and watch some football. Another guy would probably chuck an empty can of beer from being angry at him, but the guy wouldn't do that to his pretty wife or girlfriend.

It's lovely that the most common thing for naturalism is a man and woman to be biologically attracted to one another. The real question that poses still a consideration for society is whether attraction to the same sex can be dealt with properly.

Friday, September 19, 2014

An Inconvenient Truth

I guess I get mad sometimes and very selfish because I just want to be a person who just has to let out some steam. I've learned even in my selfish moments how to channel the energy in a way to not get overly aggressive with friends and strangers I don't know. With people who have been giving me problems, I don't really feel the need to bother them. Of course, they are going to be complaining up a storm over silly stuff like not wanting to put me on Facebook and unblocking me again of all things. Oh my gosh!

I actually had a related restraining order from a stupid girl because of that. She looks like a twig and is so annoying! She was like do this and this or face her wraith of a restraining order! I didn't believe her so that was my funny mistake. I was really butt hurt for a long time, until I realized that she couldn't get it extended. The judge was like "Denied!" and panned his mallet in court. I wasn't there at the hearing of course, but that's how I imagine it. It was the maximum three year sentence. All I had to do was never make contact with her- fair enough, it was easy! I thought she was so lame and now I'm like messaging her again to put another one on me. She's been ignoring my messages these days and she's sort of looking like a loser in her own social circle.

She's like one of those thin girls who you want to say is hot but just isn't! Man, I can't believe a stupid girl like her got a Master's degree in clinical psychology of all things. She is so dumb and gosh, I don't even care if she wants to go for a restraining order that lasts a 100 years! I'm going to try my best to make fun of her and laugh and give it a performance that will be worth like 10 years all in front of the judge and the court audience, if she wants to go for another 3 years of a restraining order. She's like "I don't wanna talk about it" in her nagging voice! Well, she's going to have to talk about it in court or just be sitting there all angry while I give my five minute sermon about how she's a moron.

Might As Well Let Out My Problems

I read that the Asian culture, especially for a well-developed Asian country like South Korea, are now developing a suicidal mentality. That is pretty crazy because I thought it belonged only in Japan. The Japanese and Koreans haven't had too much of a loving history, where Japan was the aggressor thanks to the council of their Emperor trying to colonize a smaller and weaker country. Grrr, I feel it too! When the Koreans whoop the Japanese at sports like in the Olympics, it feels good and never gets old.

The Koreans have a history that pretty much sucked because they fought against each other and tried to have control of their smaller than average territory. Anyhow, how they have managed to fight back and now even have like an evil twin from the north, it's just amazing where it has led up too. I looked at the Korean Airlines on a map and it just skips right past North Korea and takes you to China that borders there.

I even saw this exciting show called the Deadliest Warrior, and they featured North Korea versus the U.S. Army Rangers. Being an American show, they gave a 2% edge to the Rangers and this was going to be a fight on the North Korean's turf. Looks like with their nuclear bombs, they might actually be somebody to be concerned about. They even had this blackmail thing going on with threatening to use nukes if they didn't get paid or any supplies. Anyhow, China responded by saying that the both countries are acting like silly brothers and should stop fighting one another.

Being Korean American, if I show up in South Korea I could be drafted into their army because I am of age. That's really nice to know!

Well, It's Friday Night

I'm actually just writing really fast, so I can focus at my job. I might as well just type anything to catch up as fast as I can, but it usually ends up with me creating a longer sentence like I am doing right now.

I'm probably just going to go with it and the flow. I just think it's really cool to have a routine going with this blog. Even though no one reads it or cares to comment on it, except for those people who put comments directing to their website, I'm cool with it man!

I think you really need to work a little to have some fun. It's great to reap the benefits of having fun, whether you are lucky to be born with it or not. I think when you have something people admire or desire for, then that's where the fun can begin.

Sunday, September 7, 2014

Taking Better Care Of Myself

I'm starting feel so motivated about working out and eating right, but the hard part I still have is being consistent with it all. I think what distracts me is television! I just turn it on then even though I'm bored to death or feeling moody about my past with idiots, I flip through channels and then occasionally I want to peak at something naughty on there!

This isn't the right thing to do and I think the best way to get around this is to just make the commitment to stop and do the best one could to be like that. It's all of these aggressive feelings that go against your brain waves, but if you are loyal and brave enough to hack through all of it, then you deserve to be a successful person with a beautiful and loving spouse! Otherwise, you are just a plain loser with silly pride that does nothing but pump you up and sometimes, just become depressed. One of my buddies have asked the question, what if "God made me this way?" I finally have the answer; if one is feeling unhappy about something, then it wasn't really meant to be that way by God and the person put it on himself because he's responsible for his own thoughts and actions. Maybe his thoughts have been driving him crazy and he can't come to terms with it- this isn't really God's doing but the person's fault from not working at it and it's actually something that could be laughed about with humor.

Living With Getting Rich and Healthy In Mind

I'm actually starting to become very lenient with spending my money now. It's not really crossing my mind so much in giving to others as well. Maybe, it's just because I felt like I had a really hard time while in college from not having the money to do things that would be cool. I grew up in a working class family where my mom denied buying me some things I really wanted as a child. Pouting didn't work and then after my mom lectured me on it like an annoying person, it made me stop asking for things.

I basically suffered all those years with not having stuff to do and from having been through it, I'm actually glad that I had the experience and can make peace with it. Surely, I was selfish and know that others out there are the same as well. I have my limits even though my threshold of keeping things together is pretty high these days. One of the signs that I see for myself is that I don't use curse words in front of others! I think others no matter how much of a jerk they are being with me keep me at a level of stability.

I had some trouble with people in the past and I'm glad those experiences helped me shape up into the better person I am today.

Decision With Poker

I'm actually pretty tired with poker and don't like how I put myself in a better edge to win and then someone else gets lucky. It feels like I'm a kid getting my candy taken from by a bully! Some professionals can take the beating quite well and then adjust themselves into a genius where they become the bully and play games with others. I guess that's entertaining and I'll leave it to them to put on a show for me, but I think I'll just play poker when I'm in the mood for having a little gambling fun with some theory and skill I've been developing. I guess I'll be playing mainly to get lucky and to just to have fun for a decent purpose in life. It would only be when I'm in the mood to socialize with these folks.

So basically I'm not addicted to this game because when I lose, I play less! That's pretty good to know for me. I have a better outlet then gambling on poker when I feel the need to expend some of this energy. It's also something that fits my personality of wanting to not do much thinking now. I would like to place my focus and energy on things that are meaningful and what I'm truly passionate about developing in. I think that's going to be my main focus, so it seems like I'm never going to do drugs!

Having A Clear Mind

I think the worst thing a person could do to me is put a restraining order on me. Maybe in a freaky occasion, someone will be about torturing and then murdering me, but at least I'll feel closer to being in heaven for some reason. Having a restraining order isn't even really that bad now that I think of it; you just have to do what it says and you are good to go in life. You get to realize how much free you really are; a crazy drawback is that you aren't licensed to have firearms during that time for personal use, so might as well get into law enforcement or the military if you can work your way around it. Maybe you can still rent a gun at a gun range to practice and shoot in case the person who put it on you is trying to get your head cut off! You can even take up archery and go hunting with a air rifle maybe, or even do some javelin throwing but this is once you reach a legal age and have that fear someone is coming after you.

I've been told that I'm a smart person and most recently, a smart lover by my girlfriend. I'm happy to know that. I think I've been dealing with a few idiots because they are just plain weird from how they were brought up, but it's all good now and I'm not that frustrated with them anymore. I want to keep it that way in the future so the focus is really on me and not them, if they end up going insane because of it.

Really Taking It Easy

From having a little spending money, it's really easy for me to get carried away and then toss around my money. Overall, I guess it's really just about figuring out what works best for a person. For myself, I really do a lot of careful thinking with what makes me tick. I don't get into the mode of feeding my addictions. I feel like that's being a person with low class.

Having a buddy with a minor level of intelligence and from being completely open and honest with me, it's been great to have a second hand to tell me what's appealing and isn't. I'm sort of trying a different thing where I'm asking another person for advice on what's hip and isn't. It's just because I'm a pretty open person and a lot of things don't really get to me that easy.

I do have some temporary exchanges of personal emotions where I'll get a little mad about things, but other than that I'm not really all that into staying angry and will do my best to get those things taken cared for. I guess when it comes to people relations with those who are bad with me, it's not really about making the other person happy but more about keeping myself from getting too cranky! I, therefore, talk to them about how they can solve their issue with me and just be straight up with how I'm feeling about them; it's very important for me to not feel any hostility with them before I go after resolving something. I think that was a main worry for a few of my friends because they asked me to back off from them, knowing that I'm capable of worsening a situation.  

Thursday, September 4, 2014

Reaching Goals But Impatient About It

It seems like all the hard work you put into it has been fine and dandy but when the opportunity feels creeping around the corner, it gets pretty hard to wait on it to happen while you are doing something. It's like losing focus because you are so interested in obtaining something that you forget for a little bit what you are trying to achieve. This happens to me quite a bit with a lot of things I'm trying to achieve. I guess I'm smart enough to keep a decent work ethic, but every once in awhile when I feel like reaching a milestone, I just choke!

It's like sometimes you need that luck of being successful to keep something going and to feel emotionally satisfied over it. It's like playing a game of poker dealing with money. You play more when you feel like a winner and play less when you lose and have no more money! I'm starting to realize the possibilities of achieving my goals from a basic level. It's like I'm creating my own foundation again to get there in life!

A Few Little Things To Feel Complete

I'm doing a lot of fast paced activity to feel satisfied with my life of being a swing shift-er. What I mean by that is I work the second shift until late at night- the most I've gone up to is 3 am. I also did graveyard shift, which was actually quite fun but it was difficult to get rest during the day time. I was so tired all the time and then how my time gets shifted around all of a sudden, it made me even more tired. I was even falling asleep while standing up at work!

Those days after I think of a year or two have now passed and I'm a lot better with maintaining the discipline to stay awake. It's quite funny because all it requires is just alerting your mind to stay awake. It's like inserting yourself forcefully with the alpha waves of your brain cycle. I imagine it to be like drinking cold water imaginatively. Whenever you are tired and you have an ice cold drink of water, it feels like you have to be momentarily awake. I taught myself to do this whenever I am tired and need to stay awake, but I keep on doing it whenever I feel tired every five minutes or however instantaneously I need it. It's saved me from crashing my vehicle while driving on the side of the curb!

Doing Little Things While Tired

I'm noticing that with my mind going off with doing things that don't really have that much significance, I am losing a lot of valuable time. It sounds depressing that I'm aware of this situation and with how other things that feel like invading my mind, it's so easy to flip out all of a sudden! Nonetheless, I think a girl can feel like this sometimes a whole lot more than for a guy. It must be the biological makeup of the brain chemicals with the two genders. It's still interesting though to read and view some relationships regarding a guy and girl. Well, a romantic comedy/drama can sell pretty well to the mass even if the actors aren't that good looking or popular!

Anyhow, back to my topic, I realize that it's easy for me to chain off to a completely new topic after introducing it with a sentence. I'm doing this through my writing now and it hasn't really been tested out with an audience. I think my writing ability has given me at the best consistent level of an A- grade. Of course, I want to do get an A+ all the time! I had one professor hang on to a work and he gave me an A+ for the research I did. I don't recall what I put on that paper. It was mainly just cut and paste and rewording the research I did while using a short term and focused memory. I didn't really get anything excess out of that- I think I just invented a nice approach as a routine and that particular paper just happened to catch the professor's interest. He kept the report and I deleted it from my computer files!

Just Random Posting

I am still trying to catch up as best as possible. I feel really fat right now because I am sort of sick with a cold and want to work out while taking good care of myself. I guess I have to let it run its course, but eventually I'm going to have this good routine down.

Since I have a girlfriend now, I want to limit my attentions to her more better than going off in my own world. I'm going to try to prioritize and take really good care of myself, so I could just be there for her when she needs me. It seems like everything has connected a little better in my life from having met a love.

Continuing To Strive

Last night was a not so busy day at work, but nonetheless I tried to stay focused at it. A quote I just read today says that the best way to have a fulfilled day is to have activities and to do all of your objectives well and completely. I'm starting to now realize the possibility of me manning up now with a girlfriend!

It's very fulfilling in a way to have someone to share a lovely and meaningful life with. I still need to make a few more additions along the way, but I think I'll make it there eventually. Today, I am called in to go to work a little earlier. I guess maybe there's not that much work or I might be a little more valued for the company because I work with another guy.