I'm starting to lighten up about how some people are in general, and I don't think it really matters if they decide to unadd me or refuse to add me on Facebook now. I mean I haven't really came across anyone so special that he or she would stand out in this world and just do that to me. However, there are also people who are cool with me too no matter what stupid act I do that would annoy them temporarily.
I believe some are refusing me as a Facebook friend because they probably feel that they don't know me well enough to put a little trust and feel like they won't be able to handle something about me and want to be selfish about it, even if it's not that big of a deal to begin with. Oh well, I guess some people don't want to get along with everyone and will blame you for the wrong reasons sometimes and try to shut you off from being too annoying to them.
What I've heard commonly from these people after trying to pursue them is that they aren't really using their social media. After all, they aren't celebrities and just wish to be closed off with me now and don't even want to reveal what issues they are dealing with. People can still genuinely do this to each other while being Facebook friends too, so I don't see what the big problem is besides feeling all messed up inside and forcing oneself to forget about it. It really comes down to communicating and I did have this natural ability to get it done in getting them to add me back because it really is stupid to begin with. I just wasn't able to maintain a deeper friendship with them after from getting burnt out with them.
There's really no need to set out on correcting everyone for having been stupid about something. Better things can really be focused on to increase in personal happiness and should be obtained through lots of hard work and some luck.
Academy of Scrappy Credible Undergraduate Desire
Thursday, January 31, 2019
Wednesday, January 30, 2019
Getting Connected
I'm on a social networking site where people can sign up for organized groups and participate in events. I have noticed that it's really fun to meet different people and even hang out with them. I've met a cool chick through this way and we're great buddies now. I was attracted to her at one point even, but I resolved to hold myself back because she has always been dating someone else. She likes me though and found like the only excuse to keep me around while getting engaged recently- she told me that she loves me and sees me as a close brother.
Just plugging myself in these fun groups, I'm being very selective about the events I join and mainly I'm looking to meet some physically attractive women. The more the merrier- I really don't mind if they are taken either; I could use some more good friends who will lead me to an available and pretty girl who is just right for me.
Yesterday, I realized that driving back home took me over an hour and then I didn't have time to drive another hour to get to my social events I signed up for. I'm a lot closer to these events if I would just go to them from work. I'm going to have to just make preparations then to have this necessity fulfilled for me.
If I can just meet the right girl for me, then I think my prayers will have been answered. Other than that, I also have a nice friendship with another girl I get attracted to and she's single. It looks like it could really work out if it happened since we have common interests and don't mind hanging out with each other to do things. The flip side is that I'm learning she's a girl and the annoying things she does are also typical things girls might do in general, so I'm trying to find maybe a more understanding chick to jump into a relationship with.
Just plugging myself in these fun groups, I'm being very selective about the events I join and mainly I'm looking to meet some physically attractive women. The more the merrier- I really don't mind if they are taken either; I could use some more good friends who will lead me to an available and pretty girl who is just right for me.
Yesterday, I realized that driving back home took me over an hour and then I didn't have time to drive another hour to get to my social events I signed up for. I'm a lot closer to these events if I would just go to them from work. I'm going to have to just make preparations then to have this necessity fulfilled for me.
If I can just meet the right girl for me, then I think my prayers will have been answered. Other than that, I also have a nice friendship with another girl I get attracted to and she's single. It looks like it could really work out if it happened since we have common interests and don't mind hanging out with each other to do things. The flip side is that I'm learning she's a girl and the annoying things she does are also typical things girls might do in general, so I'm trying to find maybe a more understanding chick to jump into a relationship with.
Tuesday, January 29, 2019
Thinking With Better Perspective
I don't really feel responsible for a friend anymore with having introduced him to an addictive strategic game. I think he wants to still turn professional with it and only by doing one casual format, if it was possible, but that's not how it is really turning out for him. He says that he just can't get tired of the game, so I believe he's just not going to stop and ignore everything else because it's so fun. Unfortunately, it's not going to pay the bills for him and he still doesn't want to stop playing it.
It really bites to be hooked on something so fun and not having any means to support oneself. This is what video games do to visually stimulated and capable guys. More recently, there has been growing support for e-gamers so there are professional gamers out there, but only so few make it to the top and draw so much sponsors and supporters. They are the superstars who made it and just like any professional sport, it's just life. A person will always be considered only ordinary, until he or she finally makes it and gets recognized by the world for it. I think a person could be pretty good at something and still not have made it there yet. It's just a matter of keeping it going and being realistic about one's ability, not about how exciting or boring something really is. It's important to make a living in some fashion and even experience personal growth.
My friend is making a foolish decision from not stopping because he's just having too much fun. He doesn't really have a means to turn professional with it right now. He would probably fail a high-level math class and won't even touch it to begin with but he can't logically see that it's a game of also chance and how the game isn't designed to have consistent winners at the top, regardless of skill. There is always a little luck involved and nobody has a lot of it in the professional world he wants to be so part of. He's only participating in it because he isn't bored yet and doesn't want to leave it alone. It's really his life, but compared to him, I'm over that stage of my life.
I found something better and it's that I'm working on something that I know will reap me so much benefits if I can earn it and it's also a fun thing for me to do with attempting to earn a living. I'm practically paying nothing to learn it right now, so I will keep going at it and never give up the good fight!
It really bites to be hooked on something so fun and not having any means to support oneself. This is what video games do to visually stimulated and capable guys. More recently, there has been growing support for e-gamers so there are professional gamers out there, but only so few make it to the top and draw so much sponsors and supporters. They are the superstars who made it and just like any professional sport, it's just life. A person will always be considered only ordinary, until he or she finally makes it and gets recognized by the world for it. I think a person could be pretty good at something and still not have made it there yet. It's just a matter of keeping it going and being realistic about one's ability, not about how exciting or boring something really is. It's important to make a living in some fashion and even experience personal growth.
My friend is making a foolish decision from not stopping because he's just having too much fun. He doesn't really have a means to turn professional with it right now. He would probably fail a high-level math class and won't even touch it to begin with but he can't logically see that it's a game of also chance and how the game isn't designed to have consistent winners at the top, regardless of skill. There is always a little luck involved and nobody has a lot of it in the professional world he wants to be so part of. He's only participating in it because he isn't bored yet and doesn't want to leave it alone. It's really his life, but compared to him, I'm over that stage of my life.
I found something better and it's that I'm working on something that I know will reap me so much benefits if I can earn it and it's also a fun thing for me to do with attempting to earn a living. I'm practically paying nothing to learn it right now, so I will keep going at it and never give up the good fight!
Striving To Be Hot
Trying to be a hot, short guy is impossible for nearly 80% of the human race because those people would be considered at least normal in height, along with females included too. I pretty much can try to be in that category now since I'm part of the 20% human population who are short guys. I think it will be even more rare to be labeled sexy while being in that pile. It was nice to be considered hot and told that by Asian ladies who are my friends. When I was a lot younger, I had a lady telling me that quite often when I visited her shop and I really didn't take it seriously either.
Just by being a guy and making himself look pretty good looking and from also being short, it's not really going to do much for the lady friends. I still get hit on by one or two different ladies a month on my online dating profile and I don't even read the messages because I don't want to pay for it! I just have it left up there and the site isn't taking it down for me, so I will let those random ladies interested keep on messaging me even though I won't ever know what they are writing to me about.
I don't think a guy being hot really matters for lady friends. It probably doesn't really matter for a hot guy to not do much with lady friends, too! They are after all, only friends. It's the friendship that counts so much more, if it's just going to stay there. I'm now dealing with being attracted to a lady friend so this is where it's been starting to feel a little different. From my experiences I have been gaining, it's really about being the guy who is pursuing after something. I don't know if it's just a coincidence but a few single ladies have invited me out to end up only hanging out with them. I haven't really figured that out yet because I haven't felt like things were so right for me to just ask. I think that day is coming sooner or later, and I'm just not really worrying so much about it.
Just by being a guy and making himself look pretty good looking and from also being short, it's not really going to do much for the lady friends. I still get hit on by one or two different ladies a month on my online dating profile and I don't even read the messages because I don't want to pay for it! I just have it left up there and the site isn't taking it down for me, so I will let those random ladies interested keep on messaging me even though I won't ever know what they are writing to me about.
I don't think a guy being hot really matters for lady friends. It probably doesn't really matter for a hot guy to not do much with lady friends, too! They are after all, only friends. It's the friendship that counts so much more, if it's just going to stay there. I'm now dealing with being attracted to a lady friend so this is where it's been starting to feel a little different. From my experiences I have been gaining, it's really about being the guy who is pursuing after something. I don't know if it's just a coincidence but a few single ladies have invited me out to end up only hanging out with them. I haven't really figured that out yet because I haven't felt like things were so right for me to just ask. I think that day is coming sooner or later, and I'm just not really worrying so much about it.
Monday, January 28, 2019
Having Fun With Priorities
I'm realizing with the time we spend, we all have so little than we could imagine. It's amazing how people can work on stuff and just turn it into something so creative and fun to share with others. I was really inspired last night by attending a small art exhibit hosted by a group of no-name and talented artists. Getting a photo with them, along with my friend who carpooled with me, I totally wonder if one of them will ever become a superstar in her art field. I was really amazed by her talent and passion she was able to portray with her works, even though I spotted a noticeable flaw on one of her smaller prints she was selling. Other than wondering if she did that intentionally now because I bought a few of them from being affordably half price, I think she really brought out some hot stuff. She's also a very pretty and approachable girl so never know if she will become big.
I honestly don't see myself making a dent in anything really. I just want to work hard enough to retire young and be smart in how I invest my savings and then spend freely from the earnings to have fun but not waste it lavishly on stupid things that famous, rich people like to do sometimes. I think that excess money from being rich could seriously go to giving back and helping out the less fortunate- I want to help out good and able people too who are getting sick of some things becoming a hassle for them.
There's definitely enjoyment that can be found from reaching after goals and working hard for them and just staying with that beat. I think as of this moment, I need to focus on having fun with my priorities first rather than going after time-spending activities that are also fun. It would be awesome to earn the excess time from becoming filthy rich and then having nothing to do, go after playing video games competitively with other kids as an old rich man.
I honestly don't see myself making a dent in anything really. I just want to work hard enough to retire young and be smart in how I invest my savings and then spend freely from the earnings to have fun but not waste it lavishly on stupid things that famous, rich people like to do sometimes. I think that excess money from being rich could seriously go to giving back and helping out the less fortunate- I want to help out good and able people too who are getting sick of some things becoming a hassle for them.
There's definitely enjoyment that can be found from reaching after goals and working hard for them and just staying with that beat. I think as of this moment, I need to focus on having fun with my priorities first rather than going after time-spending activities that are also fun. It would be awesome to earn the excess time from becoming filthy rich and then having nothing to do, go after playing video games competitively with other kids as an old rich man.
My Top Five Steps To Finding A Girlfriend
I might have a connection with a lady friend right now who is actually nice the majority of the time and I also happen to be attracted to her sometimes. Other than that, since she's my buddy and it's like I don't even know if we'll be dating each other anytime soon, I might as well look to expand my options with finding a girlfriend. If I can find a better lady than this friend, then it would be dumb to not try to ask her out on dates if she's available and interested. I mean I'll keep on learning how women are and maybe this friend will look so much better for me to settle with; I'm just speculating with maybes and have no definitive answer, but I think it will be fun.
Here's my rules that I just made up and I may be adjusting them like I always do with my personal styles of how I want to live:
1.) Trust in Jesus!
2.) Trust, trust, and trust in him. I'm just exaggerating, but it's really about looking for fun events that catch my interest.
3.) It's to match them with my schedule, so availability.
4.) Counting the number of attractive ladies that will be there. It's about being surrounded by physically attractive women for me since I'm a guy and want to pursue after someone, so might as well have fun with this.
5.) Lastly, the driving distance. I need to be home at a specific time because I have to wake up the next time early for work.
Here's my rules that I just made up and I may be adjusting them like I always do with my personal styles of how I want to live:
1.) Trust in Jesus!
2.) Trust, trust, and trust in him. I'm just exaggerating, but it's really about looking for fun events that catch my interest.
3.) It's to match them with my schedule, so availability.
4.) Counting the number of attractive ladies that will be there. It's about being surrounded by physically attractive women for me since I'm a guy and want to pursue after someone, so might as well have fun with this.
5.) Lastly, the driving distance. I need to be home at a specific time because I have to wake up the next time early for work.
Friday, January 25, 2019
I See My Struggle
It's not a big deal really but it's something that I should be aware of and finally come to terms with because it's one of those guy areas that's been messing me up quite a bit and stuck with me since I started getting attracted to women, which was at a young age for me without knowing what was going on too! It's pretty funny actually then because I'm so ordinary, but I haven't gone out doing what some guys would do because God is against that type of behavior. I believe it's for good reasons and that true happiness would come from not going into some sinful path and still pursuing after those desires and trusting that the Lord would deliver them in His perfect timing.
I definitely have trust and faith issues with living out for the Lord. If the Lord all of a sudden spoke clearly to me and said to drag my feet into a country that would feel like I'm stuck in hell, then no I wouldn't believe I was getting that type of command from God and not even go at all. I somehow found this balance of figuring out what I want and going after it while sticking to God's rules. If I'm feeling impatient about it and hurting from just not feeling like I'm getting it in time then that's where I need to rely on the Lord for strength and trust that His ways will reign supreme and the storm will pass while I keep on going after it and sticking with a positive can-do attitude while still working hard for it.
I realize that at this age of pardon my French, still being a virgin and not really caring about dating healthy, attractive, and single ladies without kids who aren't, I just need to find the right one who will be loving and want to do that thing regularly. I'm great friends with a couple loving and attractive girls and she might seem a bit interested in me but they both call me family like I'm their brother. I don't know if I waited too long but it seems like that terminology might be just used for stating that she feels closer and trusts me among her circle of good people. She still introduces me as her friend to others and states that's our relationship.
I mean I'm wonderfully attracted sometimes to one of them, and I can tell that she likes me while wanting to spend time with me but just don't know if she would be interested in regularly doing what I believe is a key component of marriage. Maybe later on, if I ever realize she's seriously the one for me because I let it get there, I might be even willing to do a lesser amount of it to make her happy and find another way to get over it. It's not going to be the end of the world though, but it is a pretty strong desire that I would like to experience pretty regularly if possible. If I can find the right one who would be so into it also then I think my prayer will be answered. If not, I can still work with what I have going for me because I'll lean to the Lord even in bad times and give credit to Him when times are good.
I definitely have trust and faith issues with living out for the Lord. If the Lord all of a sudden spoke clearly to me and said to drag my feet into a country that would feel like I'm stuck in hell, then no I wouldn't believe I was getting that type of command from God and not even go at all. I somehow found this balance of figuring out what I want and going after it while sticking to God's rules. If I'm feeling impatient about it and hurting from just not feeling like I'm getting it in time then that's where I need to rely on the Lord for strength and trust that His ways will reign supreme and the storm will pass while I keep on going after it and sticking with a positive can-do attitude while still working hard for it.
I realize that at this age of pardon my French, still being a virgin and not really caring about dating healthy, attractive, and single ladies without kids who aren't, I just need to find the right one who will be loving and want to do that thing regularly. I'm great friends with a couple loving and attractive girls and she might seem a bit interested in me but they both call me family like I'm their brother. I don't know if I waited too long but it seems like that terminology might be just used for stating that she feels closer and trusts me among her circle of good people. She still introduces me as her friend to others and states that's our relationship.
I mean I'm wonderfully attracted sometimes to one of them, and I can tell that she likes me while wanting to spend time with me but just don't know if she would be interested in regularly doing what I believe is a key component of marriage. Maybe later on, if I ever realize she's seriously the one for me because I let it get there, I might be even willing to do a lesser amount of it to make her happy and find another way to get over it. It's not going to be the end of the world though, but it is a pretty strong desire that I would like to experience pretty regularly if possible. If I can find the right one who would be so into it also then I think my prayer will be answered. If not, I can still work with what I have going for me because I'll lean to the Lord even in bad times and give credit to Him when times are good.
Thursday, January 24, 2019
Going After Adjustments
It's pretty hard right now because I'm feeling this weight of a burden and just feeling pressured because I don't have what I want basically. I think I deserve to have this upon me because I haven't really put enough work at it or just wasn't that lucky of a person to get there anyhow. It could really be a combination of both, so looking at it, I'm not really anybody special. I'm just an ordinary person who has been trying to find his own way in this world and make some meaningful sense out of it while trying to wholeheartedly stick closely to God's ways. I'm constantly faltering and in the flesh, so now I have to resort to praying about confessing my struggles to the Lord and to stay motivated with sticking around Jesus.
I'm going to have to trust in the Lord even if I'm not going to climb to the top in the end and just try my best on a daily basis. Yesterday, I was going through some typical guy struggles now that I think of it even if it didn't register like that originally. It could just be that what I'm seeking after in this world would be something I become tired of in the end once I obtain it. Jumping into a dating/romantic relationship with a girl buddy I've come to become attracted with is something I'm seriously considering now. I'm just probably going to lead an ordinary and fun life, but I really have to be successful financially so that I could have all this time to travel and meet other lifeforms and even be able to give back and just be happy overall from all those things. It's like I would need to find a proper balance from putting in the hard work, but maybe my style is really about being catered to taking it easy mostly and enjoying mainly the positives like always trying to indulge in tasty desserts found in life figuratively speaking and having an attractive partner to share it with.
I'm going to have to trust in the Lord even if I'm not going to climb to the top in the end and just try my best on a daily basis. Yesterday, I was going through some typical guy struggles now that I think of it even if it didn't register like that originally. It could just be that what I'm seeking after in this world would be something I become tired of in the end once I obtain it. Jumping into a dating/romantic relationship with a girl buddy I've come to become attracted with is something I'm seriously considering now. I'm just probably going to lead an ordinary and fun life, but I really have to be successful financially so that I could have all this time to travel and meet other lifeforms and even be able to give back and just be happy overall from all those things. It's like I would need to find a proper balance from putting in the hard work, but maybe my style is really about being catered to taking it easy mostly and enjoying mainly the positives like always trying to indulge in tasty desserts found in life figuratively speaking and having an attractive partner to share it with.
Wednesday, January 23, 2019
Pushing Through While Tired
Right now, I'm going after developing discipline of working at it right after a long day of working ten hours and feeling so asleep and having lack of motivation to do anything! It just crossed my mind of what I wanted to work on and then it shut off again while thinking I could browse the web to read up on random things. I am just an average guy in a short man's Asian body who is thinking in American for the most part. Does this seem pretty out of place?
Yet, it's really funny for me ideally at the moment I'm thinking up all these comments to write about. It's fun to share with an anonymous crowd. I myself am being anonymous too even though I'm really trying and I don't know how many of the originals who were on this site are still reading this. I don't even know and I'm not even opening myself up for comments. I don't think anybody really has to message me; otherwise, I was nice enough to do something for them. It's probably impressive enough to just be nice to them who might think they are nobodies or just feel weird on here but not care and entertain oneself like I'm doing.
I don't think this website is really much of an attention grabber and would probably be better with a domain name if I wanted to make a name for myself. I'm really grateful for Google though to allow me to just put down anything and have a log of Internet ramblings or sometimes decent write-ups for memory or something to look at later and compare how I'm doing now for closure. I did say that I'm fully grown as a person now, but I see room for myself to keep on improving. This is something I will keep on trying with my naivety.
Yet, it's really funny for me ideally at the moment I'm thinking up all these comments to write about. It's fun to share with an anonymous crowd. I myself am being anonymous too even though I'm really trying and I don't know how many of the originals who were on this site are still reading this. I don't even know and I'm not even opening myself up for comments. I don't think anybody really has to message me; otherwise, I was nice enough to do something for them. It's probably impressive enough to just be nice to them who might think they are nobodies or just feel weird on here but not care and entertain oneself like I'm doing.
I don't think this website is really much of an attention grabber and would probably be better with a domain name if I wanted to make a name for myself. I'm really grateful for Google though to allow me to just put down anything and have a log of Internet ramblings or sometimes decent write-ups for memory or something to look at later and compare how I'm doing now for closure. I did say that I'm fully grown as a person now, but I see room for myself to keep on improving. This is something I will keep on trying with my naivety.
Tuesday, January 22, 2019
Staying On Point
It looks like what I'm doing is trying to find something comfortable to set up and then keep on running with it. I honestly would like to put in the least amount of time possible and have a nice yield of my investments. This is probably what everybody wants. I don't honestly want to deal with people in business either at the same time because I will be such a nice guy in the end and give free stuff away. If I have a lot of money, then that would be cool to go on searching for the best and be nice at the same time with people and to continue rolling with the punches while leading and backing some cool project.
Since I don't have the money and I have this very picky preference that happens to never go my way and how there's so much risk involved at the same time with continuously losing money, it would make sense to just give it up. Doing some research, it looks like there's an influx of cheaper alternatives with safer investments, but lower yields. It's better than just letting the money sit around in a savings and do nothing but lose value from collecting inflation. At the same time, there's plenty of demo accounts out there to just practice away and mess up to melt all of that personal pride away from still being horrible at it while not sacrificing any hard-earned money!
The reason I'm thinking about this now is because competing for other people's money fairly is pretty much a battlefield of being stalemated. It's just constantly outdoing each other and melting away precious time, which I don't mind because it's fun but the progress is that it's a slow build to turning a profit. Everything as it turns out is going to start out super slow for me because I'm not special nor unique with my personality. I'm just like anybody else but with quirky experiences that I don't think anyone would trade me for sadly. I think some people wouldn't have minded being in my position but just do it differently. I'm just glad I didn't turn out to be a nutcase in the end. My status of growing as a person in life has pretty much completed while having been through some weird or boring experiences.
Since I don't have the money and I have this very picky preference that happens to never go my way and how there's so much risk involved at the same time with continuously losing money, it would make sense to just give it up. Doing some research, it looks like there's an influx of cheaper alternatives with safer investments, but lower yields. It's better than just letting the money sit around in a savings and do nothing but lose value from collecting inflation. At the same time, there's plenty of demo accounts out there to just practice away and mess up to melt all of that personal pride away from still being horrible at it while not sacrificing any hard-earned money!
The reason I'm thinking about this now is because competing for other people's money fairly is pretty much a battlefield of being stalemated. It's just constantly outdoing each other and melting away precious time, which I don't mind because it's fun but the progress is that it's a slow build to turning a profit. Everything as it turns out is going to start out super slow for me because I'm not special nor unique with my personality. I'm just like anybody else but with quirky experiences that I don't think anyone would trade me for sadly. I think some people wouldn't have minded being in my position but just do it differently. I'm just glad I didn't turn out to be a nutcase in the end. My status of growing as a person in life has pretty much completed while having been through some weird or boring experiences.
Monday, January 21, 2019
Keeping the Mind From Wandering
I have a really bad habit of not listening to my own thoughts and conscious judgments sometimes. I really have to thank God that the worst thing I really lost was probably just Facebook friends! Actually, I don't think losing Facebook friends is more worse than losing a lot of money. I lost a lot and I'm lucky that I have the money now to climb out of the deficit. I still haven't used it yet though, so I think I could have avoided jumping the gun and getting conned into something even more! Nowadays, I'm no longer willing to put in the effort while not knowing what I'm doing and taking a gamble. It's really dumb to go in this type of direction.
The annoying part of all this is that I really know a person who will act that way and not be very much helpful to the operation of my success. He's just going to want to be a freeloader for doing not much and be happy about just having the connection and getting goodies! His worth of education is not very much- probably to the level of junior high school which is pretty low for an average adult. Well, to him, having a paycheck and not worrying about rent and having a little money in his pocket from working hard intensely as a minimum wage package handler is like gold for him. He's probably still hurting though that he hasn't been able to reach his dreams yet and is realizing slowly what he should have done. I'm pretty impressed about him though that he can still be more practical sometimes than the average person even if he doesn't present himself in an appealing manner and sounds out of place a lot. He's just one annoying guy to deal with, and it was hard enough for me already.
I guess the total objective is about getting to the main purpose and perfecting the components that get to it. It's nice to put in the extras but it would be better to focus on it after the whole thing is performing at a very satisfactory level and just focusing on finding ways to make the ordinary purpose work even better while making sense.
The annoying part of all this is that I really know a person who will act that way and not be very much helpful to the operation of my success. He's just going to want to be a freeloader for doing not much and be happy about just having the connection and getting goodies! His worth of education is not very much- probably to the level of junior high school which is pretty low for an average adult. Well, to him, having a paycheck and not worrying about rent and having a little money in his pocket from working hard intensely as a minimum wage package handler is like gold for him. He's probably still hurting though that he hasn't been able to reach his dreams yet and is realizing slowly what he should have done. I'm pretty impressed about him though that he can still be more practical sometimes than the average person even if he doesn't present himself in an appealing manner and sounds out of place a lot. He's just one annoying guy to deal with, and it was hard enough for me already.
I guess the total objective is about getting to the main purpose and perfecting the components that get to it. It's nice to put in the extras but it would be better to focus on it after the whole thing is performing at a very satisfactory level and just focusing on finding ways to make the ordinary purpose work even better while making sense.
Sticking With It
I guess my life is really revolved around sticking with things and putting a decent amount of serious focus on them. I'm lucky to really be alive and this is how I feel for the most part. I give all the credit with my successes to the Lord! It's just all based on believing that Jesus rose again from the dead and was God incarnate while having been born as a man from a virgin. From reading the Bible and looking for answers to my questions, I came to the conclusion and believe the testimonies are true from evidence that's good enough for me and it's entirely up to everyone to decide for him or herself. It could even be just from not wanting to believe and doing something else. I'm not going to try to force the Bible upon people and just keep it honest as best as I can.
It feels like I'm wanting to make a living as a financial risk manager for now because of it's flexibility and with it not having to really deal with the complexities of underperforming employees. Since I am an employee myself and working underneath someone to earn a living, I should be really happy about it and the fact that I'm earning a decent sized salary which I haven't had in years, I should be really working hard at this company and continuing to further my success in the career.
It's really quite difficult at the moment because after work, I'm feeling knocked out and I really want to go pursue after more things afterwards. I'm no longer really feeling the need to play video games nor even watch that much movies and television on my own. It's fun to do with friends no doubt, but on my own time, I would rather try to keep on earning a lot more money at a quicker pace and legally so that I wouldn't have to work long hours like I'm doing right now. Where I have chosen to try to big dividends is pretty much competing to take other people's money in areas that have a lot of people, rules that favor nobody, and is pretty much an exchange of assets. It's much like trading stocks and this is where I have been forming an interest in all these years.
It feels like I'm wanting to make a living as a financial risk manager for now because of it's flexibility and with it not having to really deal with the complexities of underperforming employees. Since I am an employee myself and working underneath someone to earn a living, I should be really happy about it and the fact that I'm earning a decent sized salary which I haven't had in years, I should be really working hard at this company and continuing to further my success in the career.
It's really quite difficult at the moment because after work, I'm feeling knocked out and I really want to go pursue after more things afterwards. I'm no longer really feeling the need to play video games nor even watch that much movies and television on my own. It's fun to do with friends no doubt, but on my own time, I would rather try to keep on earning a lot more money at a quicker pace and legally so that I wouldn't have to work long hours like I'm doing right now. Where I have chosen to try to big dividends is pretty much competing to take other people's money in areas that have a lot of people, rules that favor nobody, and is pretty much an exchange of assets. It's much like trading stocks and this is where I have been forming an interest in all these years.
Saturday, January 19, 2019
Loving Life
Loving life is so important and needs to be done with plenty of laughter. Laugh out loud with me! HA HA HA, one HA syllable at a time. I seriously want to laugh so hard and giggle- it's so easy to make the same breathing noise while laughing like at a machine gun rate!
I think I have minor bipolar from being depressed about not having a girlfriend at one minute and then laughing about it the next second. It's like I need to make up my mind about my situation. Actually, I'm happy that my girl buddy I'm attracted to responded back to me. She's really nice, but man it's hard to worry about not getting a text and just sitting there while feeling all this pain of not getting some attention. It's crazy how as individualistic creatures we all think and interact differently.
I don't respond at instantaneous speed either at my girl buddy. I take my sweet time and sometimes even days. When she does that to me, I'm all worried about it. I'm so hypocritical and I just need to stop feeling so depressed about not receiving a silly text message! I don't care if people text me, but I start caring if the texts I send out don't get cared about. I'm so selfish and a hypocrite!
I think I have minor bipolar from being depressed about not having a girlfriend at one minute and then laughing about it the next second. It's like I need to make up my mind about my situation. Actually, I'm happy that my girl buddy I'm attracted to responded back to me. She's really nice, but man it's hard to worry about not getting a text and just sitting there while feeling all this pain of not getting some attention. It's crazy how as individualistic creatures we all think and interact differently.
I don't respond at instantaneous speed either at my girl buddy. I take my sweet time and sometimes even days. When she does that to me, I'm all worried about it. I'm so hypocritical and I just need to stop feeling so depressed about not receiving a silly text message! I don't care if people text me, but I start caring if the texts I send out don't get cared about. I'm so selfish and a hypocrite!
Avoiding the Bad Sides of Life
This is pretty much about avoiding stuff that stink and are retarded in life. I think when a person sucks on his bad flaws and tries to spit out a new creation then it becomes like an even more naughtier lump of phlegm. I guess it really bites that I don't have a girlfriend. I'm actually laughing but I don't think I should continue complaining about how I don't have a girlfriend even though it's really funny.
I think it's all in good humor now and I'm realizing that's how life can be perceived as while losing at something. I have played a good amount of games to try to earn money competitively to know the feeling of crossing the finish line and then something from far away coming around to smack it out of reach!
It's pretty much about pursuing if you are a guy and sticking around and hanging out at places while chilling and having fun with great company if you are a girl. I am a guy, so I'm supposed to go around pursuing and from being a short guy, I just have to find ways to impress the super tall ladies if I ever find one interesting enough for me! Even though I'm a short guy, I'm at least capably an average guy so shouldn't be too bad around girls like six inches (15.24 cm) taller than me and below.
I think it's all in good humor now and I'm realizing that's how life can be perceived as while losing at something. I have played a good amount of games to try to earn money competitively to know the feeling of crossing the finish line and then something from far away coming around to smack it out of reach!
It's pretty much about pursuing if you are a guy and sticking around and hanging out at places while chilling and having fun with great company if you are a girl. I am a guy, so I'm supposed to go around pursuing and from being a short guy, I just have to find ways to impress the super tall ladies if I ever find one interesting enough for me! Even though I'm a short guy, I'm at least capably an average guy so shouldn't be too bad around girls like six inches (15.24 cm) taller than me and below.
Making Sense Of My Depression
I don't really know what I'm feeling depressed about, but it looks like I don't really care because I still want to become a millionaire so bad with a six pack! Okay, I guess it's because I don't really have a legitimate honey right now. I need to trust in the Lord and go around looking for one now. I do have a potential prospect to just pursue after with a girl buddy but anything can really happen at this point. I still haven't made up my mind with her, but I feel like she could be it for me right now. I don't really need to ask her out to get to know her better because we're already buddies. I know enough about her to know what makes her happy and to give her some space sometimes when I can tell she really wants it.
This is sort of a depressing feeling because I'm sort of interested with a girl buddy! At the same time, this is so funny man. I think I could even just stay friends with her too. This is sort of a depressing angle to stick around with. I think I need to go find some reinforcements and look for some more attractive and single ladies out there to pursue after and wouldn't really be a waste of time for me. I need some good friends to help me get there too, but I guess I would have to put in the most work anyway because it's always like that for me. It's depressing and funny at the same time with how it's just going to cost me more time, but I'm just going to have to trust in Jesus and go with it.
This is sort of a depressing feeling because I'm sort of interested with a girl buddy! At the same time, this is so funny man. I think I could even just stay friends with her too. This is sort of a depressing angle to stick around with. I think I need to go find some reinforcements and look for some more attractive and single ladies out there to pursue after and wouldn't really be a waste of time for me. I need some good friends to help me get there too, but I guess I would have to put in the most work anyway because it's always like that for me. It's depressing and funny at the same time with how it's just going to cost me more time, but I'm just going to have to trust in Jesus and go with it.
Friday, January 18, 2019
How I See Myself
Just a few minutes ago, I thought to myself "Man, I'm so short!" and just started laughing in my own head really hard. I'm getting really good at hiding my emotions in the exterior but on the inside, I'm just blowing up and losing control! It's quite interesting in that being a short person and never had a girlfriend, I never really pursued anyone properly. The only time I did was call a girl and said that I kind of like her and she was my freshman year of high school crush. Man, she sort of turned unattractive after high school but hey she added me on Facebook!
Yeah, she was awesome to hang around with while I thought she was so pretty and nice. Hey, she turned out to even be shorter than me too. Wow!
Yeah, she was awesome to hang around with while I thought she was so pretty and nice. Hey, she turned out to even be shorter than me too. Wow!
Thursday, January 17, 2019
Committing To Main Goals
Now it's like no matter what, I truly believe it's my natural desires so I'm going to trust in the Lord here to deliver when things are just not feeling so great. All the past issues of embarrassing myself and feeling stupid about it, I'm going to give it all to Jesus and commit myself to stay on the right track and bring all the glory for him! I'm not really so much the lost college kid who was hooked on video games anymore.
I'm going to have to concentrate really hard and start paying attention and just trusting in Jesus with his ways. This is the year for me to make my move and going after some more difficult goals and working super hard for them. By the end of next year, I'm going to move out of my parent's house and put in a down payment for a nice home of my own. By the end of this year, I will double my monthly take home pay. I'm not going to play games with myself anymore and trust the Father and give Him all the glory for the natural desires I am about to pursue after.
I'm going to have to concentrate really hard and start paying attention and just trusting in Jesus with his ways. This is the year for me to make my move and going after some more difficult goals and working super hard for them. By the end of next year, I'm going to move out of my parent's house and put in a down payment for a nice home of my own. By the end of this year, I will double my monthly take home pay. I'm not going to play games with myself anymore and trust the Father and give Him all the glory for the natural desires I am about to pursue after.
Craziness With Making Money
I am totally for gaming competitively and taking other people's money now in a playing field with set rules and trying to outdo everybody else competitively or even taking advantage of the big guns to take some money out of it for myself to profit. I am so ruthless when it comes to the business field of my choice and it's all because they are all only a game. Everything dealing with life plays a factor in this business game, and it's all about perceiving advantages and using them to gain the upper hand just to make a profit.
It's a lot of hard work and trusting in Jesus basically to stay focused on task and believing that it's my calling. I am going for it and have to leave behind the past for now, which I'm making the effort to not reveal anymore. I'm just going to exercise discipline this time around even while writing and stay committed to my true goals, no matter how crazy it gets. I'm just placing it all on Jesus and going after committing to following his teachings and putting trust in it by faith alone. I will concentrate even when it feels so hard and depressing and give all of the glory to Jesus.
It's a lot of hard work and trusting in Jesus basically to stay focused on task and believing that it's my calling. I am going for it and have to leave behind the past for now, which I'm making the effort to not reveal anymore. I'm just going to exercise discipline this time around even while writing and stay committed to my true goals, no matter how crazy it gets. I'm just placing it all on Jesus and going after committing to following his teachings and putting trust in it by faith alone. I will concentrate even when it feels so hard and depressing and give all of the glory to Jesus.
Regretful Mistakes Redefined
For some odd reason, my mind is just randomly recalling unpleasant experiences over the smallest things sometimes. I have been playing out scenarios in my head where I just become ballistic and start verbally attacking the people who drove me so crazy, but at the same time showing my funny side by saying that I want to be their friend and scaring others from trying to help them. Yeah, I could do all of that because I am still the crazy little guy who wants to always be a friend to people I'm angry with as long as I can feel something that it really isn't that big of a deal on the long run.
It was a bad choice to fall and embarrass myself like a loser when I confronted the stupid pastor and Crazy Lee. It's like a funny movie that is turning into a train wreck if you proceed to watch it even further. I regret that I was acting in the flesh like they were and how it was this positive attitude that I had trouble developing because I was just scared and how I perceived they just didn't care about all the negative things they were doing to me.
All in all, I'm still the crazy little person and I'm willing to take it all the way and put my trust in the Lord for whatever happens and work really hard to solve my own personal problems and maintain a happy feeling in the end. I just don't have time right now to do anything about it, so I'm going to have to save my crazy energy and repress it and let it build up into like a crazy, falcon punch and then release the craziness on Crazy Lee quite possibly! I'm talking about saving and letting it build for years so I don't know how much is going to go into it when it's ready but it's definitely longer than five seconds and will blow myself away and people too because of all the repercussions. I'm just going to act like and pretend to myself that I'm laying low with it, but in actuality, I'm not from now on. It's all self-control, breath in and breath out. Trust in Jesus to deliver the goods in his perfect timing and there's success.
It was a bad choice to fall and embarrass myself like a loser when I confronted the stupid pastor and Crazy Lee. It's like a funny movie that is turning into a train wreck if you proceed to watch it even further. I regret that I was acting in the flesh like they were and how it was this positive attitude that I had trouble developing because I was just scared and how I perceived they just didn't care about all the negative things they were doing to me.
All in all, I'm still the crazy little person and I'm willing to take it all the way and put my trust in the Lord for whatever happens and work really hard to solve my own personal problems and maintain a happy feeling in the end. I just don't have time right now to do anything about it, so I'm going to have to save my crazy energy and repress it and let it build up into like a crazy, falcon punch and then release the craziness on Crazy Lee quite possibly! I'm talking about saving and letting it build for years so I don't know how much is going to go into it when it's ready but it's definitely longer than five seconds and will blow myself away and people too because of all the repercussions. I'm just going to act like and pretend to myself that I'm laying low with it, but in actuality, I'm not from now on. It's all self-control, breath in and breath out. Trust in Jesus to deliver the goods in his perfect timing and there's success.
Wednesday, January 16, 2019
Interesting Feelings
A female buddy who I feel is driving me a little crazy sometimes because I feel physically attracted to her and then not some days is actually not really that bad of a person. She wants me to come over and spend time with her and her family during the weekends. We have this close knit connection like she's family and I'm so afraid of calling her my sister like it's going to destroy any chances of getting with her. Now that I think of it, it would be nice and wild to have a lady who would fit my bill of being the ideal wife and be this person the majority of time, but what if I grew tired of it later on and I just didn't want the same intended actions; well, I guess what I'm looking for in a wife is something that would be good even if I didn't feel it much in the moment like still putting my faith in Jesus even when times stink.
Overall, I don't think appearances really matter so much anymore because I seriously felt the opposite spectrums of physical attraction with this female buddy of mine. Some days she really has it and for others, she might not. If we have been spending so much time lately, like it's starting to almost feel like a chore now, I think it's only natural that I bonded with her and chose to get along with her unique personality. I'm starting to understand that she wants to be a certain person of stature and continue to give credit or respect to those who deserve it around her. She's actually not that mean and likes to put in so much effort to continue making great friends and maintain them throughout her busy life. I'm one of those lucky guys outside her family who she has come to call family and still recognizes me as a guy friend.
Overall, I don't think appearances really matter so much anymore because I seriously felt the opposite spectrums of physical attraction with this female buddy of mine. Some days she really has it and for others, she might not. If we have been spending so much time lately, like it's starting to almost feel like a chore now, I think it's only natural that I bonded with her and chose to get along with her unique personality. I'm starting to understand that she wants to be a certain person of stature and continue to give credit or respect to those who deserve it around her. She's actually not that mean and likes to put in so much effort to continue making great friends and maintain them throughout her busy life. I'm one of those lucky guys outside her family who she has come to call family and still recognizes me as a guy friend.
Living A Full Christian Life
I'm practically not finding favor with a large group of acquaintances for what interests me. I can't get them to like me right away whenever I want them to. I just don't have that natural ability and in a way, I think people can sound crazy if they do go around judging others who are in the spotlight. I would like to avoid being there and under scrutiny by everyone while risking the possibility of stressing out because something came out wrong.
In a way, I think it's bad to be an attention seeker while pursuing after something that isn't the best thing. It's like chasing after a compromise and this is what I feel I had been doing by sending passive aggressive messages to people on Facebook. I need to put a stop to it and give the stress and worries and feelings of uneasiness because I'm just feeling so impatient about not wanting to let something linger all to the Lord.
There really is freedom in living as a Christian and it doesn't matter what the person's background was. It doesn't matter what the person is feeling or having trouble fending off in their flesh. The Lord will make a way when there seems to be no way and by giving all the effort a person is willing to give, why not go after something he or she was just born to desire and have this natural ambition for! It's best to stick to the Lord's ways even if there's going to be something others might feel offended about from being this way.
In a way, I think it's bad to be an attention seeker while pursuing after something that isn't the best thing. It's like chasing after a compromise and this is what I feel I had been doing by sending passive aggressive messages to people on Facebook. I need to put a stop to it and give the stress and worries and feelings of uneasiness because I'm just feeling so impatient about not wanting to let something linger all to the Lord.
There really is freedom in living as a Christian and it doesn't matter what the person's background was. It doesn't matter what the person is feeling or having trouble fending off in their flesh. The Lord will make a way when there seems to be no way and by giving all the effort a person is willing to give, why not go after something he or she was just born to desire and have this natural ambition for! It's best to stick to the Lord's ways even if there's going to be something others might feel offended about from being this way.
Not By My Own Strength
I realize I am helpless when it comes to not being a selfish person and trying to limit myself from being sinful after feeling miserable. I'm just going to have to put all my faith in the Lord's ways and let the storm pass and live in this manner. I'm really bad at praying, but I guess I should be doing a lot more of that and trying to pay attention when I'm reading the Bible or listening to insightful teaching.
I don't think I'm in the wrong for still pursuing after friendships with people who wronged me after being mad at me for bad reasons. I want to put in the effort and keep it there and focus on my needs more than theirs and solve problems that they may cause me while being a happy guy. I don't have time to do this for now, so I'm going to have to focus on my natural calling that God is putting me through and to let Him lead me in the right path while trusting through those daily cycles that feel like things aren't going my way.
I don't think I'm in the wrong for still pursuing after friendships with people who wronged me after being mad at me for bad reasons. I want to put in the effort and keep it there and focus on my needs more than theirs and solve problems that they may cause me while being a happy guy. I don't have time to do this for now, so I'm going to have to focus on my natural calling that God is putting me through and to let Him lead me in the right path while trusting through those daily cycles that feel like things aren't going my way.
Tuesday, January 15, 2019
Subduing the Spiritual Enemy
In Christian terms, I was able to agree with a pastor I listened to on the radio while driving to work this morning and trying to skip the traffic by cheating and entering the carpool lane, yes I know I'm bad for doing this and it's awesome to be barely on time for work at the same time! What I agreed with the pastor is that there are three main things the Bible refers to when it talks about the enemy. There are also some other verses too that could be referring to other warring nations of Israel in the Old Testament as well, but in spiritual context, it's the systematically scheming world, the flesh which is our sinful nature, and Satan.
One of the things I'm on the hot seat about with my flesh is that I like to not pay attention to things around me when it's "Me time" and just wander off into something else that might not have anything to do with God. It could be that I'm experiencing minor traumatic stress from imagining or remembering a certain person, event, or thing that I'm worrying about.
I guess it's good then to have a female attractive buddy who I hang out with often nabbing at me for all the little things I do wrong! It gets so annoying that she points it out at times and her brother just started laughing and being dismissive when I complained to him about her well-intended behavior. Anyhow, she's still a potential prospect that I could end up pursuing. I feel like I'm connecting with something I tend to struggle with- it's keeping in focus with all the little details and being aware of how all of it works together at the same time to construct the general purpose and relates to how I'm living.
One of the things I'm on the hot seat about with my flesh is that I like to not pay attention to things around me when it's "Me time" and just wander off into something else that might not have anything to do with God. It could be that I'm experiencing minor traumatic stress from imagining or remembering a certain person, event, or thing that I'm worrying about.
I guess it's good then to have a female attractive buddy who I hang out with often nabbing at me for all the little things I do wrong! It gets so annoying that she points it out at times and her brother just started laughing and being dismissive when I complained to him about her well-intended behavior. Anyhow, she's still a potential prospect that I could end up pursuing. I feel like I'm connecting with something I tend to struggle with- it's keeping in focus with all the little details and being aware of how all of it works together at the same time to construct the general purpose and relates to how I'm living.
Personal Requirements For Dating
I guess from realizing I had a chance with a girl I liked for only one time in being with her and that it just went out the window and how she sees me as a brother now and is engaged to someone else, I really have been thinking about what I'm looking for in a dating relationship. I'm looking to glorify God in marriage by having plenty of heterosexual activity!
It's rather simple then with what I'm looking for. First of all, I need to be attracted to her and secondly she needs to be available and interested. I want her to be willing to save herself for marriage and to feel something genuine from realizing her love. Lastly, I have to be in the mode in pursuing after her. I'm okay with just staying friends and trying to find someone else.
For one of my current relationships, I do have a female buddy who I'm attracted to physically and get along nicely with occasional annoyances from doing a little arguing. It's just that I'm not sure if it's good timing to pursue after her. Maybe, after she's done with her graduate school in like the next four years and shows herself to be really settled in and I still can't find anyone better than her and she's also not in a dating relationship with anyone. I'll just see how long I can put up this act of handling this attraction while around her in the meantime and who knows, maybe I could feel it's really meant to be and try sooner.
It's rather simple then with what I'm looking for. First of all, I need to be attracted to her and secondly she needs to be available and interested. I want her to be willing to save herself for marriage and to feel something genuine from realizing her love. Lastly, I have to be in the mode in pursuing after her. I'm okay with just staying friends and trying to find someone else.
For one of my current relationships, I do have a female buddy who I'm attracted to physically and get along nicely with occasional annoyances from doing a little arguing. It's just that I'm not sure if it's good timing to pursue after her. Maybe, after she's done with her graduate school in like the next four years and shows herself to be really settled in and I still can't find anyone better than her and she's also not in a dating relationship with anyone. I'll just see how long I can put up this act of handling this attraction while around her in the meantime and who knows, maybe I could feel it's really meant to be and try sooner.
Monday, January 14, 2019
Getting An Ideal Body
I don't quite have the height because I'm short and under 5 feet 5 inches. I won't ever be at the top echelon of athletes who were gifted with being born and having wonderful genes to play an entertaining sport for earning lots of money. I accept it and trust in the Lord to deliver me to my needs of wanting a nice income with a great load of free time. I can use my mind and stubborn ruthlessness to play competitive with others and take their money in an agreed game with established rules. My ultimate job will be earning people's money while playing a game that favors nobody and has simple rules. How you play it is entirely up to you and based on how smart you are and not about being athletic.
Despite me being short and practically no chance with gorgeous women who are only charmed by guys with the full package, I trust the Lord will deliver me someday to a good girl who is hot! I may be a shorty and looked down by tall people for it, but it doesn't mean that I can't work out to obtain muscles also and have a nice, masculine shape. This is my other natural desire and I give this credit to the Lord. Basically, my time will be about going after all of these ideal desires of mine at its purest form because I know it isn't sinning against the Lord from doing them and they can be used to profit the kingdom.
I don't know so much about muscles and looking good but I guess it will help out my confidence a lot more and keep me from being a bitter guy towards taller men with attitude issues. I guess then since I am smart enough to not land in jail and cause people headaches over the most stupid things, I should obtain this desire so that I would chill out a lot more from trying to force myself to stay humble when I'm dealing with average people who are mad about nothing and I influenced them to get there.
Despite me being short and practically no chance with gorgeous women who are only charmed by guys with the full package, I trust the Lord will deliver me someday to a good girl who is hot! I may be a shorty and looked down by tall people for it, but it doesn't mean that I can't work out to obtain muscles also and have a nice, masculine shape. This is my other natural desire and I give this credit to the Lord. Basically, my time will be about going after all of these ideal desires of mine at its purest form because I know it isn't sinning against the Lord from doing them and they can be used to profit the kingdom.
I don't know so much about muscles and looking good but I guess it will help out my confidence a lot more and keep me from being a bitter guy towards taller men with attitude issues. I guess then since I am smart enough to not land in jail and cause people headaches over the most stupid things, I should obtain this desire so that I would chill out a lot more from trying to force myself to stay humble when I'm dealing with average people who are mad about nothing and I influenced them to get there.
Personal Idea For Making Money
For myself, I am a trained programmer and have the skills necessary to survive with researching for help on coding issues and even recruiting talent if needed for assistance in developing an app I'm interested in. I will just be struggling a lot and I guess that's what one can call hard work! It's just that when you get to the end of it and finish it, it's like the best feeling in the world.
I'm not a very patient person when it comes to the business world. I really want money to be flowing and making me dividends even while I sleep. This is where it gets really risky and hard while lots of potential cash being lost in the process of finding an effective method that will help one gain profit. From not being a very people-interactive person for business, I prefer to be competitive about taking other people's money. I don't like developing a product and waiting for people to jump on it. I think everybody would want the best thing out in the market for free and I am guilty of using my Internet resources to obtain the information for virtually nothing myself!
I belong in the trader's market and even like to rely on a little luck sometimes with online poker, but it's still a pipedream. I accept that despite the losses and heartaches I incur sometimes, it's something I prefer grinding at for making a comfortable living.
I'm not a very patient person when it comes to the business world. I really want money to be flowing and making me dividends even while I sleep. This is where it gets really risky and hard while lots of potential cash being lost in the process of finding an effective method that will help one gain profit. From not being a very people-interactive person for business, I prefer to be competitive about taking other people's money. I don't like developing a product and waiting for people to jump on it. I think everybody would want the best thing out in the market for free and I am guilty of using my Internet resources to obtain the information for virtually nothing myself!
I belong in the trader's market and even like to rely on a little luck sometimes with online poker, but it's still a pipedream. I accept that despite the losses and heartaches I incur sometimes, it's something I prefer grinding at for making a comfortable living.
Basic Needs
I'm going to try to prioritize again with obtaining my basic wants and just not go around sulking anymore and trust in God to deliver me to where He wants me to be in life. This is something really new once again and I believe this means that I'm going to have to sacrifice at the moment trying to influence some people who got mad about really nothing with me to move on. I'm talking about Crazy Lee and her church who got fed up with me. They were religiously sick about something and can't let it go still because they don't want to move on and be friends with me again.
I believe that my heart is aligned and trying its best to stick to the pages of the Bible, but I believe that God has a calling for each one of us and that He wants us to be truly happy while staying in worship and burying Scriptures underneath our hearts. This means that I should be setting out with obtaining my true desires right now and give credit to the Lord while treating those things as a priority.
My basic desires is something I have discovered naturally and it's something that I'm sure all of us can feel even though it may be so different from one another. I'll share mine because I don't think it's hard to relate somehow or feel connected in some way. I would like to have a very sexy body from working out and having a good diet. Secondly, I would like to double my income and increase my free time and lastly, find myself a loving and attractive woman to marry!
I'm going to go after these goals because they are my true, natural desires. This means that I'm going to have to be off of Facebook a lot more right now because I don't have them. It's fun to post crazy fun pictures that I took though. I don't think I can afford my time to going after friendships with people who still want to shut the door on me. I can try to influence them from trying my best not to be so crazy and becoming weird enough that they don't understand me and start guilt tripping, but I have to focus on my needs right now. I think it's my calling from the Lord to pursue those natural desires and to give Him all the credit for my successes and to lean onto Him when times are rough.
I believe that my heart is aligned and trying its best to stick to the pages of the Bible, but I believe that God has a calling for each one of us and that He wants us to be truly happy while staying in worship and burying Scriptures underneath our hearts. This means that I should be setting out with obtaining my true desires right now and give credit to the Lord while treating those things as a priority.
My basic desires is something I have discovered naturally and it's something that I'm sure all of us can feel even though it may be so different from one another. I'll share mine because I don't think it's hard to relate somehow or feel connected in some way. I would like to have a very sexy body from working out and having a good diet. Secondly, I would like to double my income and increase my free time and lastly, find myself a loving and attractive woman to marry!
I'm going to go after these goals because they are my true, natural desires. This means that I'm going to have to be off of Facebook a lot more right now because I don't have them. It's fun to post crazy fun pictures that I took though. I don't think I can afford my time to going after friendships with people who still want to shut the door on me. I can try to influence them from trying my best not to be so crazy and becoming weird enough that they don't understand me and start guilt tripping, but I have to focus on my needs right now. I think it's my calling from the Lord to pursue those natural desires and to give Him all the credit for my successes and to lean onto Him when times are rough.
Sunday, January 13, 2019
Stepping Back Into Action
I now realize that I want to double my income and increase my time available so that I will be ready to enjoy life and take on settling down with a great girlfriend wherever I meet her in this world. I'm actually full-on straight and have noticed it since I was about the fifth grade which is definitely during my pre-adolescence. I was really fascinated and confused by looking at a man's hairy chest and thinking they belong to a lady's sometimes. I'm laughing about this experience as I write this right now and probably a few will relate to me if there are people out there who don't think I'm weird already!
I really had definite interest in the medical field so looking at those textbooks to study a little about the woman's body was a fun time for me. It's nice to pick up knowledge that you are thirsting to know and it's important to try to let it be aligned with God's Word. This practically means I need to control my insatiable interest right now which deals with being attracted to a female buddy. I'm figuring that she has great qualities and she's an inspiring creature which I never took notice originally. The Bible says it's better to settle down then to let it burn with passion for the rest of your life. I think I'm meant to find someone to marry. I only feel like it's problematic because I'm not that lucky with finding girlfriends right now.
I really had definite interest in the medical field so looking at those textbooks to study a little about the woman's body was a fun time for me. It's nice to pick up knowledge that you are thirsting to know and it's important to try to let it be aligned with God's Word. This practically means I need to control my insatiable interest right now which deals with being attracted to a female buddy. I'm figuring that she has great qualities and she's an inspiring creature which I never took notice originally. The Bible says it's better to settle down then to let it burn with passion for the rest of your life. I think I'm meant to find someone to marry. I only feel like it's problematic because I'm not that lucky with finding girlfriends right now.
Being On The Look Out
The Bible says that it's better to not be married and stay single and that there are more advantages available with doing things for God's kingdom. It might be weird to think this way and easy to ignore while continually questioning why I don't have a girlfriend. Oh well, my time will come I guess someday. I don't think I can control the length of time to find someone that will please my family and getting married at the same time. I will just try and be on the look out then while being myself and trusting in God to continue working on me in this area.
Yet the advantage of being single is that I could go out and work on something that interests me without having obligations to another wonderful lady. I could work on my problem solving my own issues and let it be aligned with everything the Bible says in an objective manner and to the best of my ability. I can be persuasive from using the Bible and be so excited about sharing and practicing its principles in getting those dummies to let go of their paranoia and let me be their friends.
Staying In Line
The hardest thing to do is like staying focused and disciplined while not letting bad things get to you. I mean I am buddies with two girls who are sisters who argue and love each other at the same time. One gets mad at the other and it's like a silly fight can break out between them over something that might not be so important. It really comes down to both being selfish about something and not being to handle something. I guess if it keeps going on for years over the same argument, it's enough to drive sisters crazy. This is what I'm starting to realize being a part of family might be all about. People are individuals and have goals and different interests and are of course selfish! It's just an ingrained part of people.
What I believe is lucky about those two girls though is that they both have been attractive at one point and can still be from still being young! I am a guy and being around them arguing and really comfortable with me there must really mean something. I'm learning about their qualities and how not to let their faults get the worst of me.
I honestly believe wholeheartedly sticking to the Bible and being patient and continually working at it even if things are not lining up to the heart's content is the way to go. This is something new that I'm accepting these days. It really is hard work to break through some barriers that were set up by crazy idiots and to stay in check.
What I believe is lucky about those two girls though is that they both have been attractive at one point and can still be from still being young! I am a guy and being around them arguing and really comfortable with me there must really mean something. I'm learning about their qualities and how not to let their faults get the worst of me.
I honestly believe wholeheartedly sticking to the Bible and being patient and continually working at it even if things are not lining up to the heart's content is the way to go. This is something new that I'm accepting these days. It really is hard work to break through some barriers that were set up by crazy idiots and to stay in check.
Well I'm Back
I came back from a Eurotrip a few days ago and feel really rusty about writing on this blog right now. Anyhow, I'm like so behind and I can see how the number of visitors also dipped as well because I'm putting nothing on here. I guess I don't really know enough to connect with people to make them get so obsessed about me. In a way, I think that's creepy so my personality is probably not really something a person would really want to mess with if he or she doesn't like me.
I managed to talk to Chris's wife over the past weekend by messaging her on Facebook. We aren't friends or anything but she told me that she feels protective about the people she's friends with on Facebook from thinking I might not like them. I did ask her to add me, and I just said that moving on can mean becoming friends and it's a wonderful feeling to put in the effort to just be friends and it's a principally sound thing to do in general as a human being. It really doesn't matter what happened for me now and I believe it's probably because I don't have too much trouble looking at them as at least like they are weird family members.
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