It feels like my heart is finally at this really relaxed state of mind and surely, I'm handling all the things I have been sad about with myself for my whole entire life a lot better than before! I used to be pretty nervous about over doing anything and then becoming depressed from having invested so much and failing. I sometimes had mild panic attacks because of this fear. One guy was a jerk and partially took notice of it with me. He would accuse me of basically fidgeting around too much and didn't really do anything for me. He also would come across as condescending and I was mad enough that I ended up making him go crazy by unintentionally saying stuff that wasn't offensive or anything but it definitely was something he didn't perceive correctly. I'm sure he doesn't want to talk about it because it would paint him in a negative light. If he did want to talk about it, then it would be beneficial for him but with it being seeing upon as negative it would be something he wouldn't have preference with talking about, even if I approached it all nice to him. This is what I did and man, he was so mad!
My approach has evolved into letting the cat out of the big and arguing with infallible proofs that can't be argued against. It's the Computer Science mentality to come up with solving problems by doing these types of math so that all worries can be put to rest. I have been taking advantage of it a lot lately with a few close people who want to argue using their emotions with me. I think the effect is like they are being put right on the spot with something bad about them and there's nothing they can do about the thing I pointed out and proved with a simple contradiction method, which they probably even had no real clue about so they just don't react so violently to it because it would hurt their own agenda even more.
I'm starting to feel a lot more confident in this area of dealing with negativity or people with grudges on me now. I can even identify it and prove it from using just simple contradiction too. If they didn't have a grudge over me, then they would be open to talking about something personal that relates to me and not tell me to go away when they have the time to give right then and there. They wouldn't need to act so bothered about it. The fact that they are acting in that manner and saying no to discussing about a passed event and wasn't illegal or anything and doesn't have any conflict-of-interests either like no non-disclosure agreement was signed really shows they aren't happy. They usually say they have no problems moving on and if they did, then they wouldn't have to act all visibly bothered to begin with from just asking them about it, even if they blamed me for something. Assuming they had no grudge to begin with, then they would never act this way with me.
I reasonably feel they should all go see a therapist because I unintentionally made them go crazy. These are signs they can't manage like I can. If I couldn't manage, then I wouldn't be able to express desire to put them at least on the lowest level in my circle of friends. It just means I will spend the least amount of time with them compared to my best friends but I'm willing to call them friends if they can with me now after establishing a decent acquaintanceship.
My style with proving things and trying to be infallible is simply from applying proof by contradiction and it was very well reinforced from taking my CS major very seriously! To be a decent programmer, you have to be able to prove your algorithms are infallible also so if I did a lot of problem solving and seeing all of this complex human activity with their emotions popping up in my discerning head and can extract useful and observable data, then yeah I might as well use it whenever it's appropriate for finalizing the objective.
Academy of Scrappy Credible Undergraduate Desire
Tuesday, July 23, 2019
Saturday, July 20, 2019
Relating Passions To Marriage
I have noticed something useful for myself, and I can say this about me with some authority because if I couldn't do this then I would have been in deep trouble by now while writing about people having gone crazy with me all these past years. I can say I was just tempted all the time to punch a hole in my own wall and kept blaming most of the personal pain on only myself. The only reason I'm not in trouble is probably because I just had to do nothing to get what I wanted while trying to design a stellar plan and that's what happened! If I was a vegetable-in-a-shell, then I wouldn't have kept up this blog all these years and there's content that focuses only on me written by me for my own personal profit and glory. It feels good to work out your own personal problems on your own and mainly put in almost all the effort without anyone else and pick yourself back up. I felt like a runt and I was at the bottom of the pit, but I had to do nothing to get back to where I wanted so I can keep on bragging about it all I want to now!
I'm pretty hard to perfectly relate to because I refuse to be transparent with the world deliberately. I'm sure if I was a genius and went all out for something good in this world, then people would start flocking over but the thing is, I'm just not one of those. I'm probably more like closer to the bottom of the very best people like rank 30 out of 100,000. I can reasonably say that with my categories I've listed on this personal blog, I am that active to be around here. I still think of myself as #1 out of being active with posting write-ups compared to all the current and former Computer Science students on this blogger site and it's only from averaging one post a day every year for quite some time.
I have definitely found some contagious, inner humor for myself and it's nice to have it. I find it to be funny with being successful, and it's been cool to try to lead others to join my wild ride sometimes and have them laugh along with me.
The biggest thing I'm noticing is that I should be letting go of the ones if possible that are dragging me down or the ones I don't want to stick around for when times are bad. This is only with myself though for earning a living. If it dealt with an inter-relationship problem then I think my passion would be about trying to fix it and letting it ride it out until it crumbles in some cases and cry about it later! In this case then yeah, it still applies and I should let go of the things in my life that I don't really feel so passionate about. For my job, I'm just doing it to earn money so I can invest it and make more money. The real passion comes from wanting to invest for me rather than my current, full-time job.
There's basically main goals that I have and also supplementary ones to deal with. After all, I'm mainly about trying to always have fun and enjoy myself. I do want to look sexy and healthy too, along with always settling for decency. I think passion is like a marriage because even in hard times, you are still there working on it. It's like one of the most important things for people to have because it's like no matter what happens, it's what they won't mind doing even if a situation is being tough on them.
I'm pretty hard to perfectly relate to because I refuse to be transparent with the world deliberately. I'm sure if I was a genius and went all out for something good in this world, then people would start flocking over but the thing is, I'm just not one of those. I'm probably more like closer to the bottom of the very best people like rank 30 out of 100,000. I can reasonably say that with my categories I've listed on this personal blog, I am that active to be around here. I still think of myself as #1 out of being active with posting write-ups compared to all the current and former Computer Science students on this blogger site and it's only from averaging one post a day every year for quite some time.
I have definitely found some contagious, inner humor for myself and it's nice to have it. I find it to be funny with being successful, and it's been cool to try to lead others to join my wild ride sometimes and have them laugh along with me.
The biggest thing I'm noticing is that I should be letting go of the ones if possible that are dragging me down or the ones I don't want to stick around for when times are bad. This is only with myself though for earning a living. If it dealt with an inter-relationship problem then I think my passion would be about trying to fix it and letting it ride it out until it crumbles in some cases and cry about it later! In this case then yeah, it still applies and I should let go of the things in my life that I don't really feel so passionate about. For my job, I'm just doing it to earn money so I can invest it and make more money. The real passion comes from wanting to invest for me rather than my current, full-time job.
There's basically main goals that I have and also supplementary ones to deal with. After all, I'm mainly about trying to always have fun and enjoy myself. I do want to look sexy and healthy too, along with always settling for decency. I think passion is like a marriage because even in hard times, you are still there working on it. It's like one of the most important things for people to have because it's like no matter what happens, it's what they won't mind doing even if a situation is being tough on them.
Friday, July 19, 2019
Identifying Passions
I have been so inspired lately and now I'm going to share what I think is the best way for obtaining all the heart's desires. This is something that I am going to try practicing for myself to see if it works, so I'm not looking for any guinea pigs out of the readers here because I'll be my own preacher practicing what he's preaching!
First off, you really have to identify what you seriously want and can't be half-hearted about it. One of my half-hearted activities is playing online poker for money and not looking to win anything. If I win from usually outsmarting my opponent then it's great; otherwise, it won't be fun losing to them after they get their lucky draw. Still, it's pretty funny to have like a 99% chance of winning on the turn and then they get their miracle card on the river. I guess it's entertainment for me then because I don't expect to win with even that high of a percentage. I don't believe in any heart-of-the-cards nonsense but in poker, as long as you can lose, you can be sure that it will happen at some point and that's going to be any time the opponent can draw something. However, it won't happen as much so the right decision would be to play on and always call their all-in shoves! It's entertaining to win a little money and then all about being a sourpuss to start hating the game of poker after losing to a lucky opponent.
With what you want in life, it's something that needs to have that passion which just pops up everywhere. Even if I'm programming in an outdated language and it's a lame task dealing with my job, I still feel the passion man! I love coding and seeing how the program runs and letting it do its thing on autopilot while following some algorithms I came up with. I am definitely meant to earn money while being a software developer and that's what I'm doing in most cases at my job.
I'm also feeling really passionate about game development. It's just cool to be a failure even and stress out about it not working for me. It's probably not so much for a lot of other people, but it's different for me. Overall, software developing is enjoyable for me and something I'm grateful for making a living off of. Another thing I'm diving into now is investing and this means earning passive income.
There are also side activities for getting to the main goal and some goals that are just plain overwhelming but it's something that you would have to be inspired to do. Those are hard to stay motivated for so I guess it just comes down to setting a personal deadline and doing the best one can. It took me this long to talk about what I'm going to do about for dealing with all my passions. It needs to be about commitment and making a promise to do them with yourself by a set time like in one day maybe. I'm going to try it out and see where it takes me. The final push is about making the effort and doing the best you can.
Thursday, July 18, 2019
Working At A Successful Mindset
Well, I can say that I feel pretty good about the last post. I sent it to someone who knows the people associated while adding in some of those obvious names to it, but it was more attributed to being Lee's dumb minions. It was a church where Lee claimed to be a spiritual leader over me and she was out to do me some harm by making me angry enough to get tempted with punching a hole in a wall. To get there, I would need some brass knuckles but I never purchased any so I'm sane! I'm saying Lee's minions are another way of calling them followers because Lee was the leader and those followers did her weird bidding with me. If they weren't being weird then I wouldn't have from them what I wanted the most by doing nothing, so I reasonably feel they are dumb since that's all it took.
Anyway, one of those dummies who followed Lee is the husband of this nice lady I sent a copy of my last post too. She replied with the picture of a huge thumb up and her opinion in the form of declarative sentences but sounds like an open-ended question with what it takes to make a reconciled relationship grow again. I'll just let it sit there and sink in for awhile. She's actually still this pretty chill gal and is dealing with four rotten kids sometimes I'm assuming ( a kid I know around their age is always super nice and being mostly raised by a cool, single mom) and they are close apart and soon enough, there will be adolescence. I wonder if she'll still be chill then while worrying about her naughty kids, if it ever gets to there.
If I was a loving father, I think I'll buy a "You've been a bad boy" or "You've been a bad girl" paddle and spank them once or twice if they are teens and it gets me to that level. Maybe they could be disrespectful to me or something like that and I can't take any more of it. Well, there might be my solution on top of trying to spoil them with expensive and exciting family vacations.
From just finishing reading a book on investing and getting the gist out of it, it says to be successful you need to know how to make money and then be able to invest it. All this time, I've been trying to make money with swing trading. With investing, it's pretty much a passive style where you don't do anything and it pays you off with dividends. Or maybe, you could put it in a retirement account and let it grow on its own. There's a lot of cool stuff to learn about with this getting rich part.
I think swing trading is something that I won't have to spend a lot of time on either because it's way slower than the average day trader's mentality. Still, my swing trading approach is probably around 70% of being actually passive. I enjoy it too and I think that's the most important thing for picking a profession. It's like once I can get this swing trading off the ground, I can put my earnings into tax-deferred accounts like 401K, Roth IRA, bonds, and qualified stocks. I can even do tax write-offs by putting some money into a charity account!
The buck doesn't just stop at swing trading. I'm also an aspiring software engineer with an interest in being a project or product manager with ideally video games. Maybe, I'll try to start my own business but take it down a notch by not competing with AAA video games and take on a different market. I think I'll program free apps for the Android and Apple phones that I can see people using a lot and place ads in there, along with always the option to buy it to remove them.
On top of working my way to riches, I don't want to be a fat wealthy man. I want to be fit and comparably looking good physically to other elite, cross-fit athletes! Finally and not the least, I will go after finding a smoking-hot and loving lady to settle down with!
Anyway, one of those dummies who followed Lee is the husband of this nice lady I sent a copy of my last post too. She replied with the picture of a huge thumb up and her opinion in the form of declarative sentences but sounds like an open-ended question with what it takes to make a reconciled relationship grow again. I'll just let it sit there and sink in for awhile. She's actually still this pretty chill gal and is dealing with four rotten kids sometimes I'm assuming ( a kid I know around their age is always super nice and being mostly raised by a cool, single mom) and they are close apart and soon enough, there will be adolescence. I wonder if she'll still be chill then while worrying about her naughty kids, if it ever gets to there.
If I was a loving father, I think I'll buy a "You've been a bad boy" or "You've been a bad girl" paddle and spank them once or twice if they are teens and it gets me to that level. Maybe they could be disrespectful to me or something like that and I can't take any more of it. Well, there might be my solution on top of trying to spoil them with expensive and exciting family vacations.
From just finishing reading a book on investing and getting the gist out of it, it says to be successful you need to know how to make money and then be able to invest it. All this time, I've been trying to make money with swing trading. With investing, it's pretty much a passive style where you don't do anything and it pays you off with dividends. Or maybe, you could put it in a retirement account and let it grow on its own. There's a lot of cool stuff to learn about with this getting rich part.
I think swing trading is something that I won't have to spend a lot of time on either because it's way slower than the average day trader's mentality. Still, my swing trading approach is probably around 70% of being actually passive. I enjoy it too and I think that's the most important thing for picking a profession. It's like once I can get this swing trading off the ground, I can put my earnings into tax-deferred accounts like 401K, Roth IRA, bonds, and qualified stocks. I can even do tax write-offs by putting some money into a charity account!
The buck doesn't just stop at swing trading. I'm also an aspiring software engineer with an interest in being a project or product manager with ideally video games. Maybe, I'll try to start my own business but take it down a notch by not competing with AAA video games and take on a different market. I think I'll program free apps for the Android and Apple phones that I can see people using a lot and place ads in there, along with always the option to buy it to remove them.
On top of working my way to riches, I don't want to be a fat wealthy man. I want to be fit and comparably looking good physically to other elite, cross-fit athletes! Finally and not the least, I will go after finding a smoking-hot and loving lady to settle down with!
Wednesday, July 17, 2019
Putting Things You Control In Its Place
The common saying goes there's a time and place for anything. From taking a political science/ethics course, I've heard that a person can do anything he or she wants but may or not be forced to deal with repercussions. For example, I can say that being yelled at by the people I kept approaching who went crazy and couldn't handle something I did to try to reason with them was definitely a repercussion. It's something I can accept now and even expect but I'm countering by arguing that they should probably find a therapist because I didn't do anything to them in the first place and they were acting like bullies to me while blaming me for something they had no control over. I can also argue now their logic was wrong too from contradicting their ignorant claims. It first starts off with them still having been around me and how they would have left and they even identified two of their own members to blame something to me about, but those individuals didn't really leave while I was there too. Yeah, they were just being jerks and up to really no good while thinking crazy about me at that moment in time and space. I'm just glad that I reasonably feel they are dumb; otherwise, I would have been in deep trouble about it and not get what I wanted the most out of them which I already have.
It's important to make the most out of those crazy situations and here I am still finding epiphanies about it because it's just that very big for myself even though what they felt crazy with me about was misinterpreted. I keep on saying that with them having been jerks, they couldn't do much to me anyway so I think that even might lower their confidence in how they can deal with people even more. I think they can redeem themselves by being cool with themselves next time they want to go off in a crazy-weird or paranoid direction with anyone.
I might actually have a gift with being able to deal with this matter, like it's my powerhouse. It's amazing from naturally focusing all my might on it that I ended up getting what I wanted from not doing anything about it at all. It is the right answer, after all and I'm glad to be sharing it.
Basically putting things in their place that you can control, all of this has nothing to do with what others did to me, it was all about me. Even one of the guys who went crazy with me was telling me that I'm focusing too much only on myself and kept on complaining about it. This is how it's always been and I intend to continue trying to befriend them again with the intention of placing them on the lowest level in my circle of friends. The higher the level, the more time I want to spend with them but with these people, it would be hardly noticeable if I ever do at all after I establish the sweet acquaintanceship with them again. It's interesting that I'm also aware of how a few individuals might have anger issues about this too. If I just said, I want to be friends with them- they would think I'm crazy and maybe some would try to persuade me not to or maybe they would just stay quiet while feeling mad about the situation and from my track record, maybe turn crazy with me too in the end if I keep on bringing it up like that.
I think my repercussion is seeing people turn crazy with me in our relationship and never having mentioned to them that they might need to see a therapist about it to deal with it because I don't have much of an issue with staying happy and being nice to others still even if they can't help staying crazy with me. They do talk a lot and none of it means much so I should approach them while they are talking to anyone and just spin it off and let the cat out of the bag. If they are mad about it, it's really dealing with them and I'm going to be kind to say everything that's bad about them that I'm aware of while arguing with my snarky proofs so maybe it will eventually influence them to confront every issue they have and move on while actually embracing their personal faults.
It's important to make the most out of those crazy situations and here I am still finding epiphanies about it because it's just that very big for myself even though what they felt crazy with me about was misinterpreted. I keep on saying that with them having been jerks, they couldn't do much to me anyway so I think that even might lower their confidence in how they can deal with people even more. I think they can redeem themselves by being cool with themselves next time they want to go off in a crazy-weird or paranoid direction with anyone.
I might actually have a gift with being able to deal with this matter, like it's my powerhouse. It's amazing from naturally focusing all my might on it that I ended up getting what I wanted from not doing anything about it at all. It is the right answer, after all and I'm glad to be sharing it.
Basically putting things in their place that you can control, all of this has nothing to do with what others did to me, it was all about me. Even one of the guys who went crazy with me was telling me that I'm focusing too much only on myself and kept on complaining about it. This is how it's always been and I intend to continue trying to befriend them again with the intention of placing them on the lowest level in my circle of friends. The higher the level, the more time I want to spend with them but with these people, it would be hardly noticeable if I ever do at all after I establish the sweet acquaintanceship with them again. It's interesting that I'm also aware of how a few individuals might have anger issues about this too. If I just said, I want to be friends with them- they would think I'm crazy and maybe some would try to persuade me not to or maybe they would just stay quiet while feeling mad about the situation and from my track record, maybe turn crazy with me too in the end if I keep on bringing it up like that.
I think my repercussion is seeing people turn crazy with me in our relationship and never having mentioned to them that they might need to see a therapist about it to deal with it because I don't have much of an issue with staying happy and being nice to others still even if they can't help staying crazy with me. They do talk a lot and none of it means much so I should approach them while they are talking to anyone and just spin it off and let the cat out of the bag. If they are mad about it, it's really dealing with them and I'm going to be kind to say everything that's bad about them that I'm aware of while arguing with my snarky proofs so maybe it will eventually influence them to confront every issue they have and move on while actually embracing their personal faults.
Being Ready For The Right Lady
I'm really good friends with a beautiful and short lady who probably makes up a decent portion of the qualities I'm looking for. The things I love about her is that she's affectionate, pretty laid back, and all-around a wonderful, decent person. The things I felt skittish about with her is that she liked to keep herself busy, and it just didn't feel right to try to commit to a long-term relationship. I lacked a lot of confidence and didn't really display enough romantic interest for her also, I guess.
With single ladies, it can be a struggle because it takes a lot of time to establish something and more often than not, they end up just liking me a lot for only a friend. Seriously, I think it's because I don't feel stability yet and I'm working at getting there still along with building my confidence. It's a big deal for me. One thing I have noticed is if I maintain composure while living through my insecurities and keep on moving forward and there's a lady who notices all this while me showing traditional interest in her with a mild manner, she's going to like me back!
I wasn't ready for it yet which sucks but it's okay I guess. I've had several opportunities and just never tried to go along with it and let some really good ones go. I wasn't really available to give the love and still not yet because I'm working on building my confidence and reaching a good amount of personal satisfaction before even handling all the good and bad things about trying to date the right ladies.
With single ladies, it can be a struggle because it takes a lot of time to establish something and more often than not, they end up just liking me a lot for only a friend. Seriously, I think it's because I don't feel stability yet and I'm working at getting there still along with building my confidence. It's a big deal for me. One thing I have noticed is if I maintain composure while living through my insecurities and keep on moving forward and there's a lady who notices all this while me showing traditional interest in her with a mild manner, she's going to like me back!
I wasn't ready for it yet which sucks but it's okay I guess. I've had several opportunities and just never tried to go along with it and let some really good ones go. I wasn't really available to give the love and still not yet because I'm working on building my confidence and reaching a good amount of personal satisfaction before even handling all the good and bad things about trying to date the right ladies.
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
Finding That Right Woman
For a pretty good portion of most of my future blog posts, I'm going to obviously talk about whatever I want and feed into calling all the people who made me mad dumb and continuously make sound arguments for it. It sounds fun right (?), especially if the person named X or Y isn't the reader. In real life though, I'm going to be the nicest person I can be without shouting and absorbing all my personal insecurities and telling people down right straight what's wrong about them in person!
How does that have to do anything about my current topic? Well, it's about finding the woman who is my type and I guess if I'm going to be making fun of her legally then maybe she really isn't my type to begin with. A lady friend who isn't my type but I'm really close to has straight out accused me of being overly optimistic. I'm really not and can be pessimistic sometimes. I just look optimistic when I'm arguing for whatever I want to do in life!
Finding the right woman is awesome and she's out there regardless of what all the other idiotic guys out there think with having to drop standards and pick a female body for raising a family with! This is a very optimistic statement. I'm all for it and the length of time it takes is just a number and will be well worth all those miserable years of not having it once it's there because love conquers all.
How does that have to do anything about my current topic? Well, it's about finding the woman who is my type and I guess if I'm going to be making fun of her legally then maybe she really isn't my type to begin with. A lady friend who isn't my type but I'm really close to has straight out accused me of being overly optimistic. I'm really not and can be pessimistic sometimes. I just look optimistic when I'm arguing for whatever I want to do in life!
Finding the right woman is awesome and she's out there regardless of what all the other idiotic guys out there think with having to drop standards and pick a female body for raising a family with! This is a very optimistic statement. I'm all for it and the length of time it takes is just a number and will be well worth all those miserable years of not having it once it's there because love conquers all.
Learning From Others
I used to want to avoid studying for awhile and not be feeling my purpose with taking classes. This is all school was about for me. It was taking classes and doing homework while studying to take exams and trying to get the best grade possible. I was so fed up with it and stressing out all the time and just not having enough fun. I was really short-sighted even though I have the ability to do well enough to usually get an A. I could have kept up with being a great student and feel good from others holding me in higher regards, but I lost that image after awhile. I turned into a weird dude who is really hard to understand why he is driving a person so crazy and being annoying sometimes. The answer never lied with the other person complaining, but it was always right underneath my nose. The answer: they just turned crazy all of a sudden!
Basically reading books now especially in the area of investing is really about trying to gain something from the author who is willing to share any tips he or she doesn't mind revealing to help anyone make money and on top of that, hoping to become a best seller. I don't see myself revealing my own secret system that I have been fine tuning all this time. I want to be part of the elusive 1% that ends up taking most of the money from everyone else and turn it into a career while enjoying my life! What's also interesting is that it's about the final destination where the money ends up going because while in a trading market, the values are fluctuating so I'm potentially losing and earning money each second so anyone in it can get a piece of the money. It's all about the proper timing because a trader would want all the money he or she earns after exiting the market to turn into a profit.
Basically reading books now especially in the area of investing is really about trying to gain something from the author who is willing to share any tips he or she doesn't mind revealing to help anyone make money and on top of that, hoping to become a best seller. I don't see myself revealing my own secret system that I have been fine tuning all this time. I want to be part of the elusive 1% that ends up taking most of the money from everyone else and turn it into a career while enjoying my life! What's also interesting is that it's about the final destination where the money ends up going because while in a trading market, the values are fluctuating so I'm potentially losing and earning money each second so anyone in it can get a piece of the money. It's all about the proper timing because a trader would want all the money he or she earns after exiting the market to turn into a profit.
Achieving True Desires
First of all, it's going to have to be about recognizing these main goals and then going after them no matter how lame it may sound to others. I don't know if a friend is compromising with his life by saying that he just wants someone to settle down with. I don't want just a somebody, but a beautiful lady who is really compatible and a loving person to marry! I think it would be so awesome and that's what I'm working towards. It requires a lot of commitment because you would then have to work at improving the things that's preventing you from getting there.
What's really scaring me is just not being satisfied with the amount of wealth I have and also the personal confidence that I'm longing for. I do want a great athletic body too, so that adds on to my three personal goals I have in mind of accomplishing: finding a super hot and loving wife, being rich off of doing something I love, and obtaining the body that I love! It's all based on one thing- love. It's about doing the things you love and working at getting there. It does require some manliness though, so I'm really inspired by others out there who have done it already and want to join the pursuit to catch up to them.
What's really scaring me is just not being satisfied with the amount of wealth I have and also the personal confidence that I'm longing for. I do want a great athletic body too, so that adds on to my three personal goals I have in mind of accomplishing: finding a super hot and loving wife, being rich off of doing something I love, and obtaining the body that I love! It's all based on one thing- love. It's about doing the things you love and working at getting there. It does require some manliness though, so I'm really inspired by others out there who have done it already and want to join the pursuit to catch up to them.
Back To Winning Ways
It looks like I became really lucky to see my fortune with trading turn around. My analysis is turning out to be so good especially from adding on a few more critical moving averages and letting go of a fickle oscillator. I don't think most of the readers out there are going to know what I'm talking about, so there you have it!
I almost already made back what I have lost the last two weeks in a few days! One of the nice things about the losing though is that I ended up getting out earlier based on my strategy turning against me. It might be something I could look to try later on if the market acts more predictable in that fashion in the future. For now, I have learned something that might be more useful for me in trying to carry out my swing trading career.
I almost already made back what I have lost the last two weeks in a few days! One of the nice things about the losing though is that I ended up getting out earlier based on my strategy turning against me. It might be something I could look to try later on if the market acts more predictable in that fashion in the future. For now, I have learned something that might be more useful for me in trying to carry out my swing trading career.
Friday, July 12, 2019
Committing To Achieving Desires
Firstly and greatly, it's so important to know what you want! Without it, what's really going to make life so meaningful at times. Honestly, I think really spiritual people are cool even though they have their struggles and can admit it. I mean I can be pushy with them if I wanted to, and I don't mean to brag but it's sort of a gift with all of these arguments I can counter on the spot with people out there who are acting like the dumbest in the world. It's just my opinion of how dumb I think they really are right then and there!
I had a special cause while feeling lazy after getting hurt by a dumb restraining order. Hey, I didn't go to jail and no I didn't need therapy. I'm going to make the argument that the other guy did and hasn't had treatment for it, assuming he didn't. If he did, then what's the point of arguing for my side successfully? Let's assume I was a total numbskull and a bunch of cuss words. If I act like this to the person, then I deserve to be in jail right? It didn't happen and it's not because I was lucky. I'm not lucky because I had a restraining order on me for three friggin years! I didn't even show up to argue my point at court and wished it would all disappear.
If I needed therapy then I would have destroyed that dude's life who put a restraining order on me, but I didn't and stayed nice for the most part. If he was the nicest guy in the world, then he wouldn't go around saying that I'm some terrorist from making stuff up while suffering massive paranoia with anger issues that he couldn't let go of. It's not me to blame but himself. It's his body and thoughts and he can control them because he has the willpower. If he had the willpower then he wouldn't need to act out all scared while talking about nonsense and then go for a restraining order on me. He needs the therapy more than I do. I stayed nice and didn't destroy him and look, the restraining order disappeared. My problems all went away like I wished by doing nothing!
Achieving a desire from doing nothing is awesome and it happened to me twice! Once from this dumb guy who doesn't consider me a friend, but I could push him to be my friend now while I put him on the lowest echelon on my circle of friends and don't consider him that highly. I can adapt very well actually to turning dumb enemies into my friend who used to be my friend and then turned into a dumb foe and then I will rarely hang around with now, if I even have the time now. The second time is with Lee who went for a restraining order and said I was following her around to talk about an issue she put herself on me. She didn't want to talk about an issue that she was the mastermind over, and I was justifying myself about the whole thing while being nice to her! Dang what a dumb lady, but I did nothing and my desire happened. The restraining order went away all by itself!
I'm getting the sense now that the people at that old church are not really going to argue with my snarky style anymore. They are probably going to be pushed around and be like accepting of the things happening to them and maybe, start feeling the way I want them to. I want them to stop thinking bad about me! This part is something that I seriously want to do something and not do nothing. I mean I want to do something about it, so there you go. Achieving desires can happen from doing something about it and in those very rare cases doing nothing and it's thanks to having been around a couple individuals who turned dumb all of a sudden.
I had a special cause while feeling lazy after getting hurt by a dumb restraining order. Hey, I didn't go to jail and no I didn't need therapy. I'm going to make the argument that the other guy did and hasn't had treatment for it, assuming he didn't. If he did, then what's the point of arguing for my side successfully? Let's assume I was a total numbskull and a bunch of cuss words. If I act like this to the person, then I deserve to be in jail right? It didn't happen and it's not because I was lucky. I'm not lucky because I had a restraining order on me for three friggin years! I didn't even show up to argue my point at court and wished it would all disappear.
If I needed therapy then I would have destroyed that dude's life who put a restraining order on me, but I didn't and stayed nice for the most part. If he was the nicest guy in the world, then he wouldn't go around saying that I'm some terrorist from making stuff up while suffering massive paranoia with anger issues that he couldn't let go of. It's not me to blame but himself. It's his body and thoughts and he can control them because he has the willpower. If he had the willpower then he wouldn't need to act out all scared while talking about nonsense and then go for a restraining order on me. He needs the therapy more than I do. I stayed nice and didn't destroy him and look, the restraining order disappeared. My problems all went away like I wished by doing nothing!
Achieving a desire from doing nothing is awesome and it happened to me twice! Once from this dumb guy who doesn't consider me a friend, but I could push him to be my friend now while I put him on the lowest echelon on my circle of friends and don't consider him that highly. I can adapt very well actually to turning dumb enemies into my friend who used to be my friend and then turned into a dumb foe and then I will rarely hang around with now, if I even have the time now. The second time is with Lee who went for a restraining order and said I was following her around to talk about an issue she put herself on me. She didn't want to talk about an issue that she was the mastermind over, and I was justifying myself about the whole thing while being nice to her! Dang what a dumb lady, but I did nothing and my desire happened. The restraining order went away all by itself!
I'm getting the sense now that the people at that old church are not really going to argue with my snarky style anymore. They are probably going to be pushed around and be like accepting of the things happening to them and maybe, start feeling the way I want them to. I want them to stop thinking bad about me! This part is something that I seriously want to do something and not do nothing. I mean I want to do something about it, so there you go. Achieving desires can happen from doing something about it and in those very rare cases doing nothing and it's thanks to having been around a couple individuals who turned dumb all of a sudden.
Wednesday, July 10, 2019
Starting To Pick It Up
Ever since I made the vow with God to always be on top of my game before I go wander off into the land of Nod, I have naturally been noticing personal improvements with myself. Just today, I finally was able to pay attention most of the time with the Book of Jeremiah from Chapters 2 - 6. I don't know if those passages are just easy for me to follow, but I kept on listening even though I wanted to doze off while driving. I know it's pretty bad, but I've learned to be a half-awake and alert drone while driving through traffic to get to work each morning.
The main technique I'm going to share is rather a psychological one for me. Instead of dwelling on thoughts, I decided to commit myself to moving forward and that's all I told myself self-consciously and then put in the effort to listen and the Scriptures I was listening to on my car stereo just started clicking. It was pretty amazing! I think this is how I can make myself function as a productive person. It's really about tenacity and consistency of putting in the effort to keep on doing something. In a way, it's about making adjustments for me.
For myself, it looks like it's just simple as thinking to myself to keep on moving forward and then put in the effort to do whatever that needs to be done. Overall, it looks like my daily purpose in detail is about working on being a software developer and trading, working out, studying or listening to the Bible, keeping myself organized, and planning to do things while executing them.
The main technique I'm going to share is rather a psychological one for me. Instead of dwelling on thoughts, I decided to commit myself to moving forward and that's all I told myself self-consciously and then put in the effort to listen and the Scriptures I was listening to on my car stereo just started clicking. It was pretty amazing! I think this is how I can make myself function as a productive person. It's really about tenacity and consistency of putting in the effort to keep on doing something. In a way, it's about making adjustments for me.
For myself, it looks like it's just simple as thinking to myself to keep on moving forward and then put in the effort to do whatever that needs to be done. Overall, it looks like my daily purpose in detail is about working on being a software developer and trading, working out, studying or listening to the Bible, keeping myself organized, and planning to do things while executing them.
Tuesday, July 9, 2019
Battling With Girly Feelings
I guess from the way I have grown up, I can be a sensitive man even though I get mad at people who make me feel that way. I think the only girly feeling that's getting in the way is not wanting to do things to progress further in life. This girly feeling also blocks out a bunch of reason and a good sense of direction. It's all psychological and possibly even physiological from the mind and body not having built enough stamina for it. Maybe, there's a purpose of having to slow down a little bit when these girly feelings arise. I don't really want to get lost in a sense with doing my own thing and just block out everything else that is important to me.
I think from having these girly feelings, I really need to constantly dwell on my purposes and remind myself to fill up that stressful void. I feel so good with the ideas that I have built for myself and it's probably just simple as looking at the to-do list I created for myself and then willing myself to get out of this girly state and be the man who will guide the lady lover who has these girly feelings someday.
Emotions are a bunch of rollercoaster states filled with ups and downs. Sometimes, it can be a very slow rollercoaster ride and those are nice at times too because it feels like you have so much time in the world while feeling so bored! My emotional mind works very ambivalently in other sense. It's sometimes very truthful and other times, it's too hard to contain the funny conjugations found in my own sentences. I honestly think that because of my ambivalence, a bunch of dorky and male jerks don't like me on social media from being so distracting who doesn't relate to them and from not even being a hot lady at least. I guess they have been struggling really badly then over nothing. Even the ladies who unfriend me must have some trouble resolving something that reminds them of a stressful memory because of me. In other words, it's probably because I annoyed them so badly and all of them just want to run away from it.
I have managed to work out my anger issues and just leaving it there because it's not really my priorities to go fix them anymore. I think that's what annoys me so much because I do like to be on friendly terms with people who added me on Facebook and then to realize someone unfriended me and for the ladies to act so whiny with girly feelings and trying to justify a short 63.25 inch male is one of the most terrifying creatures they have to deal with. I have come to an epiphany in that using what I learned from studying Computer Science is also useful in dealing with the most unlikely people who I never thought would become stupid in the first place.
I think from having these girly feelings, I really need to constantly dwell on my purposes and remind myself to fill up that stressful void. I feel so good with the ideas that I have built for myself and it's probably just simple as looking at the to-do list I created for myself and then willing myself to get out of this girly state and be the man who will guide the lady lover who has these girly feelings someday.
Emotions are a bunch of rollercoaster states filled with ups and downs. Sometimes, it can be a very slow rollercoaster ride and those are nice at times too because it feels like you have so much time in the world while feeling so bored! My emotional mind works very ambivalently in other sense. It's sometimes very truthful and other times, it's too hard to contain the funny conjugations found in my own sentences. I honestly think that because of my ambivalence, a bunch of dorky and male jerks don't like me on social media from being so distracting who doesn't relate to them and from not even being a hot lady at least. I guess they have been struggling really badly then over nothing. Even the ladies who unfriend me must have some trouble resolving something that reminds them of a stressful memory because of me. In other words, it's probably because I annoyed them so badly and all of them just want to run away from it.
I have managed to work out my anger issues and just leaving it there because it's not really my priorities to go fix them anymore. I think that's what annoys me so much because I do like to be on friendly terms with people who added me on Facebook and then to realize someone unfriended me and for the ladies to act so whiny with girly feelings and trying to justify a short 63.25 inch male is one of the most terrifying creatures they have to deal with. I have come to an epiphany in that using what I learned from studying Computer Science is also useful in dealing with the most unlikely people who I never thought would become stupid in the first place.
Ideal Self
I honestly have this aspiration to make a lot of money from swing trading and maybe even investing someday and then to spend my time wisely with learning to follow Biblical principles wholeheartedly while having a loving relationship with Jesus and also with others. I'm not judgmental of people's lifestyle choices anymore and only wish everyone would also commit their lives to Christ but I'm not going to go around trying to breath down people's necks. I'll just lead by example in other words from having fun with charity and being kind to even the worst people who I want to beat up daily!
I see myself working out and building a sexy body that I can feel really satisfied over and want to smile about while being like "Yeah!" all over the place. I really can see myself working at taking care of lady friends and being a gentleman, too. Putting in the hard work to make everything fancy and inviting a good girl over who has time to go on a date would be fun. The only thing that's really hurting my confidence is seriously not making the money I want from doing my own thing and also not having the body I want. It's probably more about the time and money I can be available for investing myself in a lovely relationship that's keeping me from putting up with the hardships of finding the right girl for me.
I have made a very wise choice in making a specific vow to the Lord. It's not the most comfortable thing to do because I feel totally bound to it and just cannot break it. To make something that will personally improve me and revolves around my life, I'm so glad that I made it and now I can work hard at focusing.
I see myself working out and building a sexy body that I can feel really satisfied over and want to smile about while being like "Yeah!" all over the place. I really can see myself working at taking care of lady friends and being a gentleman, too. Putting in the hard work to make everything fancy and inviting a good girl over who has time to go on a date would be fun. The only thing that's really hurting my confidence is seriously not making the money I want from doing my own thing and also not having the body I want. It's probably more about the time and money I can be available for investing myself in a lovely relationship that's keeping me from putting up with the hardships of finding the right girl for me.
I have made a very wise choice in making a specific vow to the Lord. It's not the most comfortable thing to do because I feel totally bound to it and just cannot break it. To make something that will personally improve me and revolves around my life, I'm so glad that I made it and now I can work hard at focusing.
Slightly Rough Patch
One of the great things about finding meetups is that you can find something that really suits your needs. I have been trying to listen to the Bible all these past days whenever I'm driving by myself and I frankly find it easy to let my mind wander off into other directions. It's really hard for me to pay attention and understand what's going on even though it's put in plain words. The descriptions that are being made isn't always direct and it's like there's this wrestling with the Spirit that's going on. The only thing that's really keeping me going with trying to understand the Bible is because of my faith in Jesus. I'm also giving the whole Bible a chance these days and really want to know the ins and outs. Even if it ends up making me doubt stuff about my faith, I still want to give it a chance to really get to know what this faith is all about.
My trading this month has hit a tough spot with a string of losing trades. I'm back to making adjustments because from last month I made a total killing off of it. I might be starting all over again, but I'm not giving up hope in finding a consistent trading pattern that will comfortably work for me. I am heavily influenced by one candlestick setup and also a way of reading chart patterns. It's from reading up on many authors who gave up a common method of trading that they all believe in, but I don't fully follow them and do my own thing too. I think the only thing I need to work on now is looking to enter the market at the right time each day for maximizing my gains and minimizing my losses. I'm getting pretty comfortable with it and I guess from all the exposure I have had with trying every system I could get my hands on, I'm just sticking to the ones that make sense for me and simple enough to maintain. It's pretty much about trying to create my own profitable system and adapting to anything that happens.
My trading this month has hit a tough spot with a string of losing trades. I'm back to making adjustments because from last month I made a total killing off of it. I might be starting all over again, but I'm not giving up hope in finding a consistent trading pattern that will comfortably work for me. I am heavily influenced by one candlestick setup and also a way of reading chart patterns. It's from reading up on many authors who gave up a common method of trading that they all believe in, but I don't fully follow them and do my own thing too. I think the only thing I need to work on now is looking to enter the market at the right time each day for maximizing my gains and minimizing my losses. I'm getting pretty comfortable with it and I guess from all the exposure I have had with trying every system I could get my hands on, I'm just sticking to the ones that make sense for me and simple enough to maintain. It's pretty much about trying to create my own profitable system and adapting to anything that happens.
Monday, July 8, 2019
Part Of The Commitment
I have made some serious vows now from having felt stupid and I'm working at them seriously. I don't ever intend on breaking my new oaths I have decided to make with the Lord. Basically, what it entails to me is to put my personal priorities first before letting my mind wander off. This will be a permanent fix for me. The whole crazy oath I have decided to make now with abstaining from porno is only from hoping that I'm able to settle down with the right lady someday. I still have quite a ways to go with building my confidence and getting things to work in full order.
One of my priorities is to keep on working to earn a living and to also work at doing something better. I have seriously tried on and off with poker, but it has its good and bad days. I think swing trading really suits my personality more than trying to earn a living from poker. I have tried to be consistent with online poker and even with the hard work and right setups, I'm still getting the short end of stick by losing to lucky opponents. I guess it happens, so I'm just going to play it recreationally now and not look to make any consistent money with it. I'm going to give it up in favor of learning to trade successfully. I like this a lot better for a job than what I'm currently doing.
I do know my preferred future with making money really deals with designing and developing software. I think it's also cool to become a product development manager and sell useful stuff for profit. Overall, for building my confidence I feel pretty good about making my to-do list a general guideline.
Sunday, July 7, 2019
The True Vows
I went off telling a supposedly funny and true story after giving a little description of my oldest vow that's still intact. I could seriously write a fictional story with made up characters with the amount of content I was exposed to over the years, but I don't know if it would be a hit. It's probably just going to be dismissed or criticized harshly by mainstream editors. I also don't have a strong interest in doing it right now because it might not make me happy to keep on running through things that made me so mad in the past and how I tried to get even with them.
My oldest vow that I'm working on is pretty much making myself a millionaire with six pack abs. I truly desire this for myself personally and very selfishly. I added on that after obtaining these I would go visit that old bothersome church and left it there. I made this vow because I felt that I was starting to get obsessed with getting even with them and wanted to focus on something better. It's pretty simple to be successful and let the money talk while having a sexy body. I could be a gentleman with this status and be like I'll be your friend and pretend like nothing bothers me with how they are behaving.
My other vow is related to getting a girlfriend after another loser who is my oldest friend started annoying me with wanting to constantly play this card game and was going nowhere with his life. He was also a sore loser and it was enraging me a lot along with him being rude on the table playing manners. I told him I was never touching my deck again because of him until I found a nice girlfriend and hopefully became rich. I haven't gone back on this vow ever since. I still have yet to find the one!
I'm adding in a couple more vows because I think it's stupid if I don't keep doing them to begin with. I think this is going to be a much wiser self-investment for me and really torture me a lot sometimes but I'm going to give myself the courage to go through it with God as my witness. I know what I want to do with my life and have them written down, but it's like the hardest thing in the world for me to always commit to them. I'm going to make this pledge to work on all of them first and that's possible at the moment before going off to doing something else to let myself wander. I swear to always do this with God as my witness.
My last vow to currently add in is the scariest one for me to make but I think I have to because if I don't it's just plain stupid to me. It deals with watching some good porn and practicing on using my private part to have long lasting endurance until the lucky lady feels so much pleasure with it first. It doesn't sound so bad in a humanistic point of view but I think it's stupid to be honest. I'm releasing a lot of little guys in the process and don't think they have an appropriate burial. What's so stupid is that I naturally possess the brilliance and power already to perform nicely and it's like there are a few other methods available too if I so badly want this with my sex partner.
With God as my witness and I know this one is something I will suffer over so badly and have a sex-related complex to hurdle over once I make this pledge, I swear to withhold myself from practicing via masturbating or watching porn by myself for any reason willingly and knowingly until I'm lucky enough to marry a lady who enjoys having a lot of marital sex for recreational purposes like maybe a drug! There is no one I would pull my pants down for and watch porn with, so that issue won't be a problem. Once I hit submit, this last one is going to be killing me almost for awhile. I know I have to because it's stupid if I keep on doing this to my little guys who will just be there hopefully past the age of 80! Okay, no take backs and looking forward to letting go of this personal complex.
My oldest vow that I'm working on is pretty much making myself a millionaire with six pack abs. I truly desire this for myself personally and very selfishly. I added on that after obtaining these I would go visit that old bothersome church and left it there. I made this vow because I felt that I was starting to get obsessed with getting even with them and wanted to focus on something better. It's pretty simple to be successful and let the money talk while having a sexy body. I could be a gentleman with this status and be like I'll be your friend and pretend like nothing bothers me with how they are behaving.
My other vow is related to getting a girlfriend after another loser who is my oldest friend started annoying me with wanting to constantly play this card game and was going nowhere with his life. He was also a sore loser and it was enraging me a lot along with him being rude on the table playing manners. I told him I was never touching my deck again because of him until I found a nice girlfriend and hopefully became rich. I haven't gone back on this vow ever since. I still have yet to find the one!
I'm adding in a couple more vows because I think it's stupid if I don't keep doing them to begin with. I think this is going to be a much wiser self-investment for me and really torture me a lot sometimes but I'm going to give myself the courage to go through it with God as my witness. I know what I want to do with my life and have them written down, but it's like the hardest thing in the world for me to always commit to them. I'm going to make this pledge to work on all of them first and that's possible at the moment before going off to doing something else to let myself wander. I swear to always do this with God as my witness.
My last vow to currently add in is the scariest one for me to make but I think I have to because if I don't it's just plain stupid to me. It deals with watching some good porn and practicing on using my private part to have long lasting endurance until the lucky lady feels so much pleasure with it first. It doesn't sound so bad in a humanistic point of view but I think it's stupid to be honest. I'm releasing a lot of little guys in the process and don't think they have an appropriate burial. What's so stupid is that I naturally possess the brilliance and power already to perform nicely and it's like there are a few other methods available too if I so badly want this with my sex partner.
With God as my witness and I know this one is something I will suffer over so badly and have a sex-related complex to hurdle over once I make this pledge, I swear to withhold myself from practicing via masturbating or watching porn by myself for any reason willingly and knowingly until I'm lucky enough to marry a lady who enjoys having a lot of marital sex for recreational purposes like maybe a drug! There is no one I would pull my pants down for and watch porn with, so that issue won't be a problem. Once I hit submit, this last one is going to be killing me almost for awhile. I know I have to because it's stupid if I keep on doing this to my little guys who will just be there hopefully past the age of 80! Okay, no take backs and looking forward to letting go of this personal complex.
Making More Vows
I have only made two vows and managed to keep them for awhile. The older one was basically made from the old church I used to blog about having caused me some anger problems. They were full of nonsense and saying I was overshadowing people and causing them to leave. The proof is made from contradiction- they said I was doing this to two ladies there, Annie and Betty and even put it on paper which I have proof from e-mail. Annie and Betty never left while I was there and assumedly overshadowing people. By just contradiction alone, they were full of themselves and a bunch of idiots, which is my opinion. I think I was really justified for calling Lee stupid and even giving her the nickname Stupid. Obviously, I'm not going to call her that in person, but I had fun on this blog even though I know Lee read this blog a few times and even quoted something I have no memory over during a court hearing to have a restraining order which she failed to make permanent. Well, if I stalked and they had proof I would be in jail. It's just that they only said I did and Annie and Betty would be like their major proof to assume and Annie and Betty personally said I did nothing like that and didn't even leave that church which was Lee's stupid complaint.
I did write a poem with my opinion that I think Annie and Betty are unattractive. I have the right to say this because they made me mad from not wanting to be Facebook buddies. I think they are unattractive from being unable to let go of small and girly things so that's what my poem was based on and how it really concerned me about wanting to date them in the future. Lee had to go off and be Stupid Lee, so yeah, it's an age old tale that's easy to deal with now because I proved her idiocy from using a proof method that I had to do for graduating in Computer Science. It isn't controversial anymore and it's just really funny. The world is full of idiots and it's my opinion.
It's great because another lady named Yuri stopped being a dumb and crazy pain-in-the-butt with me. She said I was super crazy and that I should land in a mental hospital and annoying by having kept on calling me a psycho in writing. If I was that way, she would have been killed by now from being an idiot and me knowing where she is already from having made me so mad. I was so angry but I held back by just making fun of her and she was such an unpleasant lady. It's my opinion. She accused me of being a stalker, but I blatantly and showed off to her about blocking her Facebook profile so that means I couldn't write harassing messages to her so it contradicts her claim also.
Okay, I won the major battles with two stupid ladies and it had to be done. I can still be a gentleman with them because I want to be and I do have lady friends who are so much cooler and also one who is annoying sometimes to me like a little sister. I still stick around and treat them well and even though I have trouble supporting everything Annie and Betty along with Lee and Yuri may be going through, I'll still be nice to them because I just like being that kind of guy.
I did write a poem with my opinion that I think Annie and Betty are unattractive. I have the right to say this because they made me mad from not wanting to be Facebook buddies. I think they are unattractive from being unable to let go of small and girly things so that's what my poem was based on and how it really concerned me about wanting to date them in the future. Lee had to go off and be Stupid Lee, so yeah, it's an age old tale that's easy to deal with now because I proved her idiocy from using a proof method that I had to do for graduating in Computer Science. It isn't controversial anymore and it's just really funny. The world is full of idiots and it's my opinion.
It's great because another lady named Yuri stopped being a dumb and crazy pain-in-the-butt with me. She said I was super crazy and that I should land in a mental hospital and annoying by having kept on calling me a psycho in writing. If I was that way, she would have been killed by now from being an idiot and me knowing where she is already from having made me so mad. I was so angry but I held back by just making fun of her and she was such an unpleasant lady. It's my opinion. She accused me of being a stalker, but I blatantly and showed off to her about blocking her Facebook profile so that means I couldn't write harassing messages to her so it contradicts her claim also.
Okay, I won the major battles with two stupid ladies and it had to be done. I can still be a gentleman with them because I want to be and I do have lady friends who are so much cooler and also one who is annoying sometimes to me like a little sister. I still stick around and treat them well and even though I have trouble supporting everything Annie and Betty along with Lee and Yuri may be going through, I'll still be nice to them because I just like being that kind of guy.
Thursday, July 4, 2019
Happy 4th of July
For me today, it was about messing around and I wasted a few hours playing poker and looking at saddening and boring porn while hoping on a girlfriend to come around with my out of shape body. I'm thinking so negative about myself while doing things that has nothing in mind with what I truly want to do.
I have a to-do list now of what I really want to do and I'm just going to have to set myself out and try to get them done now. There's really nothing else but just setting my mind to it and keeping a heart of discipline going. It's really about initiating and keeping it that way. I'm going to go for it.
I have a to-do list now of what I really want to do and I'm just going to have to set myself out and try to get them done now. There's really nothing else but just setting my mind to it and keeping a heart of discipline going. It's really about initiating and keeping it that way. I'm going to go for it.
Wednesday, July 3, 2019
The Main Issue
I think my mind worked around expectations like I came home early yesterday and to wait on my mom to put food out on the table. She wasn't there so I ended up watching a local baseball game with the Angels for entertainment. A starting pitcher of the Angels which I'm a fan of ended up passing away in his hotel room while on a road game at the age of 27. He was really young and it stunned the MLB community along with affecting the teammates who were close to him. I don't really have much to say about it right now, but would like to listen more about it. I just have to say that he was like their best pitcher this year and it's sad.
Well, I didn't get much done yesterday even though it was on my mind to do something about it. I was just sitting there thinking through how I was going to get it done without doing anything else after watching most of the game. What I believe messed me up is from not thinking fluidly enough yesterday. This is where I'm currently struggling. I have all these goals in mind and having trouble putting them together to make myself right now. I've always had this issue.
I guess I could start by writing out privately what I would like to get done to myself and try to keep myself from being overwhelmed.
Well, I didn't get much done yesterday even though it was on my mind to do something about it. I was just sitting there thinking through how I was going to get it done without doing anything else after watching most of the game. What I believe messed me up is from not thinking fluidly enough yesterday. This is where I'm currently struggling. I have all these goals in mind and having trouble putting them together to make myself right now. I've always had this issue.
I guess I could start by writing out privately what I would like to get done to myself and try to keep myself from being overwhelmed.
Need To Keep Trying
Lately, I'm being a very forgetful person and also just letting myself dwell with sitting around thinking and not putting myself into action. The amount of work I'm putting in and still living with my parents makes it pretty hard for me. I guess these are the problems that I need to deal with for myself. They aren't life threatening or anything in that manner- it's just not my preference with the way I'm living.
The only response I have to all this adversity I'm feeling is just to keep on trying harder for getting the things I want. I would like to be very consistent as well and this is always on my mind, but I'm still failing flat on my face. I wish I didn't see this for myself, but I just constantly do. I'm not really fretting so much about it anymore and just managing to stay calm enough.
I'm just not putting myself in the mood too much by just sitting on the couch and turning on the TV and just blocking everything else everyday. After this is all over with, I'm leaving myself feeling like I didn't get enough done. I could seriously just make these changes for myself.
The only response I have to all this adversity I'm feeling is just to keep on trying harder for getting the things I want. I would like to be very consistent as well and this is always on my mind, but I'm still failing flat on my face. I wish I didn't see this for myself, but I just constantly do. I'm not really fretting so much about it anymore and just managing to stay calm enough.
I'm just not putting myself in the mood too much by just sitting on the couch and turning on the TV and just blocking everything else everyday. After this is all over with, I'm leaving myself feeling like I didn't get enough done. I could seriously just make these changes for myself.
Friday, June 28, 2019
Finishing Out Month
Today marks the last working day of the month for me- that is pretty much my day job. I do have a few birthdays coming up and want to plan something special for them. They belong to a couple of my favorite ladies so it does make sense. I haven't really been hanging out with guys too often but there's one guy I hang out with to go to a theme park consistently to ride the biggest roller coasters out there in the world- Six Flags Magic Mountain. There's another guy I'm high school buddies with who I think is a loser and tell him such on texts all the time.
I pretty much have fewer guy friends that I keep in contact with than ladies. I feel pretty content but I want to find the hot and right lady for me to marry. Fortunately, I've hung out with that one friend who I think is the type I want to marry. She's dating someone else right now, but I don't really mind to be honest. It feels good just to feel that positive energy that cares and having a fond memory while just hanging out a few times. I just have to look for someone better and has a personality like hers then and I should be golden which is pretty sad but true.
I'm surprised that with the little amount of effort I put in with trading that it reaped benefits for me this month. I'm going to keep it up and hopefully it will last. I'm trying to get back into working out so it's always these minor details that I forget about and entertaining distractions that keep me from going. I need to realize that when I'm having fun, time is going to fly by fast and keep me from getting my hard stuff out of the way. Let's see how I do during the weekend. Peace everybody and thanks for caring to even read whoever you are. Curious and/or friendly or mortally sworn enemy, thanks.
I pretty much have fewer guy friends that I keep in contact with than ladies. I feel pretty content but I want to find the hot and right lady for me to marry. Fortunately, I've hung out with that one friend who I think is the type I want to marry. She's dating someone else right now, but I don't really mind to be honest. It feels good just to feel that positive energy that cares and having a fond memory while just hanging out a few times. I just have to look for someone better and has a personality like hers then and I should be golden which is pretty sad but true.
I'm surprised that with the little amount of effort I put in with trading that it reaped benefits for me this month. I'm going to keep it up and hopefully it will last. I'm trying to get back into working out so it's always these minor details that I forget about and entertaining distractions that keep me from going. I need to realize that when I'm having fun, time is going to fly by fast and keep me from getting my hard stuff out of the way. Let's see how I do during the weekend. Peace everybody and thanks for caring to even read whoever you are. Curious and/or friendly or mortally sworn enemy, thanks.
Doing Business For Fun
I went to a business meeting yesterday and met two Asian ladies who are a bit older than me. They are trying to sell products from rebranding them and customizing the basic cheap part to consumers. I thought it was fun to be a part of. They were still looking for a name, so I ended up coming up with titles of company names throughout the whole meeting and a name landed that one of them liked right at the end.
I do have an interest for becoming a product manager for video games, but this business isn't going to based off of that. Still, I think it will be good experience and also fun to do something and try to make money off of it. I noticed that these ladies are not that hot as they used to be, but I was completely fine with it and didn't care about being friendly to them. They are both married already, and I'm not really showing romantic signs of interest with them so they ended up patting me on the back. Even if I did, they would find it weird so I'm not going there ever and they would still pat me on the back while hugging if they had the courage for it.
I understand the whole patting thing and it hurts sometimes to get it from ladies. I don't really show it so much anymore while tearing up underneath but it's all good. This one lady is really affectionate and she is a great friend and has a fiancée who probably has to deal with us being that close and occasionally flirtatious for giggles. It's interesting because the lady I'm interested in right now doesn't even hug me with a pat on the back, but is also affectionate- pretty crazy!
I do have an interest for becoming a product manager for video games, but this business isn't going to based off of that. Still, I think it will be good experience and also fun to do something and try to make money off of it. I noticed that these ladies are not that hot as they used to be, but I was completely fine with it and didn't care about being friendly to them. They are both married already, and I'm not really showing romantic signs of interest with them so they ended up patting me on the back. Even if I did, they would find it weird so I'm not going there ever and they would still pat me on the back while hugging if they had the courage for it.
I understand the whole patting thing and it hurts sometimes to get it from ladies. I don't really show it so much anymore while tearing up underneath but it's all good. This one lady is really affectionate and she is a great friend and has a fiancée who probably has to deal with us being that close and occasionally flirtatious for giggles. It's interesting because the lady I'm interested in right now doesn't even hug me with a pat on the back, but is also affectionate- pretty crazy!
Nice Achievement
I'm ending this month on the positive side with practicing my trading skills with a financial market. I think I became lucky from reacquainting myself with a moving average that is catered for beginners of the market. I'm also topping it off with the local maximum of an ATR range to minimize acceptable stop-loss so I can scale my trades with gaining bigger profit in mind.
I have also been using this formulaic calculation for keeping track of market ranges. It's similar to Fibonacci pivots and don't know too much about it, but it's been working for me to model trades off of with decent reliability. I like it for myself so far, and it's been keeping me out of some trades I feel would be too risky and helping out with selecting the more premium trades for me. It's pretty cool.
Thirdly, I'm using a proprietary indicator that's based off of stochastic moving averages which measures the highs and lows of the market. It's again just a guideline that I use to model off my trades and look for a nice trend to ride. The creator gave it the name price action, but I see it more as if there's possibility with movement for bigger gains. It can still hang on the high and low side while the market keeps on dipping or rising, but just getting in before it hits the extreme sides has given me good results. If I get in after it hits, I have had some losses so I have something to model off of now.
Lastly, I have been a student of Japanese candlesticks for awhile and just keep it simple with looking for engulfing and encapsulating candles on the timeframes I'm trading to keep track of the current market. I just assume the market has changed and act accordingly to take a smaller loss if I'm still in it or take a profit regardless of how much I make. I'm totally like a robot with this and sometimes I regret not checking the market sooner when I could have noticed this happening and take advantage. I must be doing something right then and now I have a trading system that I just need to tweak around for two more months and hopefully I won't have to start all over.
I have also been using this formulaic calculation for keeping track of market ranges. It's similar to Fibonacci pivots and don't know too much about it, but it's been working for me to model trades off of with decent reliability. I like it for myself so far, and it's been keeping me out of some trades I feel would be too risky and helping out with selecting the more premium trades for me. It's pretty cool.
Thirdly, I'm using a proprietary indicator that's based off of stochastic moving averages which measures the highs and lows of the market. It's again just a guideline that I use to model off my trades and look for a nice trend to ride. The creator gave it the name price action, but I see it more as if there's possibility with movement for bigger gains. It can still hang on the high and low side while the market keeps on dipping or rising, but just getting in before it hits the extreme sides has given me good results. If I get in after it hits, I have had some losses so I have something to model off of now.
Lastly, I have been a student of Japanese candlesticks for awhile and just keep it simple with looking for engulfing and encapsulating candles on the timeframes I'm trading to keep track of the current market. I just assume the market has changed and act accordingly to take a smaller loss if I'm still in it or take a profit regardless of how much I make. I'm totally like a robot with this and sometimes I regret not checking the market sooner when I could have noticed this happening and take advantage. I must be doing something right then and now I have a trading system that I just need to tweak around for two more months and hopefully I won't have to start all over.
Positive Outcomes
I'm realizing that I don't really need to look at porno anymore. It's been mainly for entertainment of staying turned on whenever I've been curious about how my naïve parts work. I still feel that way to this day because I haven't been with any woman. I've been somewhat a student of it from reading up on some naughty material. I'm also very prudish and won't ever be cool doing it with just any lady which is pretty atypical for guys I think. I'm not definitely without any interest and totally want to experience it someday with a special woman after I marry her. I don't know the exact label to give myself except that I think I'm very different to most Christian guys and also worldly guys. I think I'll really be in the mood for it a lot if the wife ends up enjoying it a lot and hopefully, I'll meet her someday to go on very fun dates.
In the meantime, I just want to make myself financially successful and also go hit the gym to look sexier for building tons of confidence. There are plenty of cool ladies out there which I can't deny, so becoming a less shallow person has been challenging and so far, I'm just weighing the lady's personality type and life-style choices. I really might be open to dating this one lady I'm friends with someday. I think if I end up falling in love and bonding well with a lady then it's not really going to matter so much with the physical attraction I usually obsess about in ladies and just be like in the mood for it often.
Thursday, June 27, 2019
Taking Proper Action
Life is sometimes hard because a lot of things can happen. For me, it's been pretty smooth and I think the reason why I'm not gaining in some areas like finding a girlfriend is that I'm not taking enough action to get there. First off, I still lack a lot of personal confidence and feel like building more. I want to grow in my career while also being a super fit guy at the gym. I think I'll know when I feel really good about myself and have this knack or ability to lead a great life while attending to the needs of the wife.
The thing is I feel like I already could with the right woman, but I don't feel quite ready to go searching for her. If I get lucky with her just showing up in my life and she wants to make herself available for me, then yeah, it will be so awesome. What's really distracting me is my current living conditions. It's pretty stable, but I don't like that I'm living with my parents and paying them rent to live in their comfortable mansion-like home. It's really nice and built well for parties and my friends have enjoyed coming over. They ask about throwing another party that I haven't done in years because of my parents living there.
I think it's materialistic wealth and seeking after personal comforts that's really distracting me from going out to find a girlfriend. Being with the wrong girl can be such a hassle and I can tell this from being close friends with a lady who isn't my type. I honestly feel like I'm stuck with her sometimes, but I'm still treating her nicely like my younger sister. I even occasionally flirt to mess around with her and she always gets offended too, so I guess it's never going to work out between us. How funny is that though?
The thing is I feel like I already could with the right woman, but I don't feel quite ready to go searching for her. If I get lucky with her just showing up in my life and she wants to make herself available for me, then yeah, it will be so awesome. What's really distracting me is my current living conditions. It's pretty stable, but I don't like that I'm living with my parents and paying them rent to live in their comfortable mansion-like home. It's really nice and built well for parties and my friends have enjoyed coming over. They ask about throwing another party that I haven't done in years because of my parents living there.
I think it's materialistic wealth and seeking after personal comforts that's really distracting me from going out to find a girlfriend. Being with the wrong girl can be such a hassle and I can tell this from being close friends with a lady who isn't my type. I honestly feel like I'm stuck with her sometimes, but I'm still treating her nicely like my younger sister. I even occasionally flirt to mess around with her and she always gets offended too, so I guess it's never going to work out between us. How funny is that though?
Giving It My All With Courage
I think one of my minor complexes I have been dealing with all along is that I'm afraid of failing after spending so much time while labeling all of it as a waste of time in the end. It's been scary to act on haunches and personal drives at times. It was even worse while I was so mad with a few individuals over really nothing. I wanted to act it all out that was playing in my head, but I held back from being afraid of something more personal.
It's now time for me to put it all behind me and consider myself lucky that I'm thinking really brightly about how to manage kiddie stuff with a few individuals who bother me sometimes. I think people just get sick of it after awhile and naturally get mad if they can't really do anything about it and just keeps on bothering them. They can start acting all weird about it.
Overall, I'm just really sure of myself now and can work really hard at it while in the moment and being the most competitive I can be. I may be still scared underneath, but I'm not going to give it all up while feeling so stressed out or angry.
It's now time for me to put it all behind me and consider myself lucky that I'm thinking really brightly about how to manage kiddie stuff with a few individuals who bother me sometimes. I think people just get sick of it after awhile and naturally get mad if they can't really do anything about it and just keeps on bothering them. They can start acting all weird about it.
Overall, I'm just really sure of myself now and can work really hard at it while in the moment and being the most competitive I can be. I may be still scared underneath, but I'm not going to give it all up while feeling so stressed out or angry.
Working On Myself
Lately, I think it's just the mindset and putting in the effort with the smart actions that go along with it. What I'm missing is not jumping into swiftly with what I'm feeling a little bad about not having done yesterday. I believe I could seriously train myself to make it work better.
I feel sheepish about giving into my hobbies a lot lately, so this is probably the main reason why I eventually gave up with being addicted to video games. I wasn't feeling satisfied with it even though it was fun and easy to dwell in. I need to fix it by just living with the feelings that are stressful sometimes and think positive while accepting them and letting it all resolve in time. I know I could do a lot better for myself, and I'm just going to have to start making small noticeable changes with myself.
Need To Initiate Better
I'm realizing that I'm really slow to act right after I get out of a long day of work. It's true that this is probably the case for the majority of people, but I feel like doing something I'm more in tune to so I will have to work for it. My disadvantage is that I can't stop myself from falling asleep and blacking out for the whole night.
Yesterday, I ended up reading about professional MLB and NBA teams and the transactions they are going through, so this must mean I'm a fan and I was watching YouTube clips throughout the whole night. I guess it would be fine and dandy if I didn't have other stuff bugging me to get done first.
My soul just doesn't feel at rest from how it is and living with my aging parents and arguing with them about how they should still be able to do things they did while they were younger. I want to progress further with my career and make lots of money and just have free time to build my confidence and then go find myself a great girlfriend to marry soon. It's tough for me so far and I'm still relaxing and thinking positive. I just need to get away from my hobbies and set them aside to do the priorities my soul feels is better even if it stresses me out. I would rather make some progress besides sticking to the same old schedule of hobbies.
I really need to utilize my time better and make some adjustments to feel more comfortable.
Yesterday, I ended up reading about professional MLB and NBA teams and the transactions they are going through, so this must mean I'm a fan and I was watching YouTube clips throughout the whole night. I guess it would be fine and dandy if I didn't have other stuff bugging me to get done first.
My soul just doesn't feel at rest from how it is and living with my aging parents and arguing with them about how they should still be able to do things they did while they were younger. I want to progress further with my career and make lots of money and just have free time to build my confidence and then go find myself a great girlfriend to marry soon. It's tough for me so far and I'm still relaxing and thinking positive. I just need to get away from my hobbies and set them aside to do the priorities my soul feels is better even if it stresses me out. I would rather make some progress besides sticking to the same old schedule of hobbies.
I really need to utilize my time better and make some adjustments to feel more comfortable.
Playing Catch Up
Well, I neglected being away from my blog for awhile and now, I'm starting to wake up and smell the coffee. Some people just struggle with being a friend even if it's over complete nonsense that drove them away! Oh well, it's life and I'm gaining more tolerance out of it and actually quite happy that I'm under control and not needing to act out over stuff that makes me angry. It's really hard but I guess in the end it's about picking your battles.
Something that's been playing a role for me now and another thinking tool that's been helpful for me personally is proving stuff logically by using contradicting statements. It's from assuming how a person is a certain way and then coming up with anything to prove that position is false. It works out quite nicely. I used it while working with one of my bumbling managers. I assumed that he knows how to do his job. He ended up contradicting his own statements that really ticked me off, but I realized from assuming he knows how to do his job, why would he do that if he knew how to do his job? Therefore, he doesn't know how to do his job fully and it's a fact I proved from using contradiction.
It feels a lot better and that's for sure so I don't have to go off feeling constantly angry at this dumb manager sometimes. This is a real life application of using the induction method to prove things and it's quite practical. It's something students of Computer Science have to study in order to graduate, and I thought it was a cruel thing to learn in the beginning.
Something that's been playing a role for me now and another thinking tool that's been helpful for me personally is proving stuff logically by using contradicting statements. It's from assuming how a person is a certain way and then coming up with anything to prove that position is false. It works out quite nicely. I used it while working with one of my bumbling managers. I assumed that he knows how to do his job. He ended up contradicting his own statements that really ticked me off, but I realized from assuming he knows how to do his job, why would he do that if he knew how to do his job? Therefore, he doesn't know how to do his job fully and it's a fact I proved from using contradiction.
It feels a lot better and that's for sure so I don't have to go off feeling constantly angry at this dumb manager sometimes. This is a real life application of using the induction method to prove things and it's quite practical. It's something students of Computer Science have to study in order to graduate, and I thought it was a cruel thing to learn in the beginning.
Friday, June 21, 2019
Little Progress From Yesterday
Yesterday I talked about how I had trouble overcoming my sleepiness issues by knocking out on my chair in my room. I managed to overcome this a little by watching something that excited me and I finally managed to take a shower because I literally had to! Well, it's been like almost two months already and I was really in the mood for looking at porno for something and man, it disappointed me again! I think I really need to find a good partner who I'm in love with and looking to marry and wants to do it with me a lot!
Okay, so it felt like all those sexy body shapes with girls are nice and all, but it feels empty without the love and substance of really knowing the lady. If she's some image on the Internet, there's no fun in it. If I see her in person and don't even approach her, what's the point of even following her around like a stalker and waste so much time when that could go into spending time with finding someone else who happens to like you? I don't really get it but there must be something not working in the head sometimes. I have my fair share of people accusing me of being crazy because they were just flat out mad while doing something to them, but I was able to hold my peace and overcome them.
A lot of this is really getting to know yourself, so I learned that abstaining from trying to simulate making babies with watching porno doesn't really increase any output even after spending time away from it. It's almost like the same amount regardless. It's just that it doesn't feel right without a loving and understanding wife to enjoy doing the deed with several times a week maybe.
I'm a guy so I'm naturally aware of what's trying to turn me on, but it's different from considering if she's actually the right person for me. From left to right, beautiful women just exist and I'm happy to be single and not feel guilty right now. There's plenty of brain power and morality I'm using here to go out and meet this sexy and right gal for me.
Okay, so it felt like all those sexy body shapes with girls are nice and all, but it feels empty without the love and substance of really knowing the lady. If she's some image on the Internet, there's no fun in it. If I see her in person and don't even approach her, what's the point of even following her around like a stalker and waste so much time when that could go into spending time with finding someone else who happens to like you? I don't really get it but there must be something not working in the head sometimes. I have my fair share of people accusing me of being crazy because they were just flat out mad while doing something to them, but I was able to hold my peace and overcome them.
A lot of this is really getting to know yourself, so I learned that abstaining from trying to simulate making babies with watching porno doesn't really increase any output even after spending time away from it. It's almost like the same amount regardless. It's just that it doesn't feel right without a loving and understanding wife to enjoy doing the deed with several times a week maybe.
I'm a guy so I'm naturally aware of what's trying to turn me on, but it's different from considering if she's actually the right person for me. From left to right, beautiful women just exist and I'm happy to be single and not feel guilty right now. There's plenty of brain power and morality I'm using here to go out and meet this sexy and right gal for me.
Thursday, June 20, 2019
Follow Up From Yesterday
Yesterday, I went to another meetup that was about how to keep a sharp brain. It was a highly technical lecture that the speaker crammed all into one discussion under two hours. She started rushing it a lot, but what I learned is that it takes proper exercise, diet, and stress management to keep the brain functioning healthy. It was located somewhere in downtown LA and I parked at a Trader Joe store and was surprised by the great amount of physically attractive ladies who shop there!
Even when I walked out in the streets to get to the building, I spotted a few hot girls walking around. Man, they are all over the place in LA. This doesn't really make me feel so bad about getting rejected or feeling stuck with girls I'm friends with now! I can just cruise along and confidently wait for the right moment to happen with the hot girl who is just right for me. Yeah, I feel happy to be single and to be able to keep on looking. It's just this confidence that was flowing in me yesterday, and underneath I was thinking to myself, "Wow, look at all this opportunity in the heart of downtown LA with several hot girls around to try to find the right one for me."
After getting back home, I ended up just sitting at my desk trying to push my tired mind into action. I didn't end up doing my usual routine this time with surfing the web and watching entertainment. I still knocked out on my chair! I'm getting roughly six and a half hours of sleep when I do, so I guess I have time this event for myself now. I could probably make my morning routine a lot faster and get more sleep time in if I take a shower before sleeping. I guess I should be getting ready to hit the sack by 9 or 10ish and then wake up around 0430 to 0500 the next day. I'll just look to make a simple routine out of it even if it's killing me!
Even when I walked out in the streets to get to the building, I spotted a few hot girls walking around. Man, they are all over the place in LA. This doesn't really make me feel so bad about getting rejected or feeling stuck with girls I'm friends with now! I can just cruise along and confidently wait for the right moment to happen with the hot girl who is just right for me. Yeah, I feel happy to be single and to be able to keep on looking. It's just this confidence that was flowing in me yesterday, and underneath I was thinking to myself, "Wow, look at all this opportunity in the heart of downtown LA with several hot girls around to try to find the right one for me."
After getting back home, I ended up just sitting at my desk trying to push my tired mind into action. I didn't end up doing my usual routine this time with surfing the web and watching entertainment. I still knocked out on my chair! I'm getting roughly six and a half hours of sleep when I do, so I guess I have time this event for myself now. I could probably make my morning routine a lot faster and get more sleep time in if I take a shower before sleeping. I guess I should be getting ready to hit the sack by 9 or 10ish and then wake up around 0430 to 0500 the next day. I'll just look to make a simple routine out of it even if it's killing me!
Wednesday, June 19, 2019
Still Missing Few Things
I pretty much went to a meetup yesterday that talked about how to be a successful product manager. It was a great discussion and the speaker pretty much said you have to be competent at it from doing your homework and also managing great relationships with the staff and customers. This is pretty much the main takeaway I got from it.
Once I came back home, I sat at the couch where my dad was watching some Korean movie I thought was boring, so I got up and went to my room. I was starving after the meeting, so I snacked on some ice cream and then surfed the web with reading up about this Anime I'm currently hooked on and watching YouTube clips about NBA legends. I thought looking at that stuff wasn't going to hurt me, but then I became really tired and started sleeping while sitting on my chair. This has become a habit that I'm getting tired of.
I need to find some way to keep pushing myself even though I'm really sleepy and get my tasks done. I guess it would be easier if I just manned up and did the boring and hard stuff that I need to do first and get it out of the way. I think I could give my life to boredom and constant agony of being pestered with wanting something so badly that's out of reach and just work on it while feeling all that burn and just keep going at it while knowing this is what I want to do in the end anyway. I can focus with playing on Friday to Sunday. Therefore, I have to give my work focus four days and then the rest will be party time for me with whatever I want to do, and I will worry about how to do fun things to be happy and manage that problem in the meantime as well.
Tuesday, June 18, 2019
Things To Add In Or Fix With Current Situation
Right now, I definitely know what I feel inspired with doing. It's crazy because one of my dumb goals is to be a medical practitioner someday while paying for my own medical school and then volunteering while not receiving any pay for it! Yes, I'm that interested in helping out and it's not about the money for me. I want to earn all the money I need from being successful trading in financial markets and doing it with a swing trading and investor's mentality. It means that I don't have to be constantly monitoring several charts and skimming through updated news on the other monitor even though I find it to be more fun these days than stressful. It sucks when you're losing but that's where confidence plays a role and for me, I don't want to be there when I'm going to have a losing trade and just collect my winnings like it was done automatically. This is how I feel from doing the long term investing modes.
It's cool I know and a lot of people are into it, I know. Guys with my similar attitude approach me and talk to me about it. I can only share so much you know and it's a competition after all to hog all the money, so helping a little guy out with just a few tips here and there help reinforce the brain with sound techniques that have to be done in order to keep on winning all that money! It's common sense with the way I'm also acting, and I even blew off a guy too who was about trying to make me encourage others to be lazy and make me feel like they are my boss. I'm not having it and making them work for the money, if they want in so badly. I'm also a highly competitive person when I get angry so yeah, I'll be nice and law-abiding citizen - yeah right, if I can't get away with it and keep staring at all those cops and everybody else who gets on my bad side with dirty looks they don't want to see from me.
What I need to add in is maintaining all of my bills. I'm skipping just the minor ones like monthly memberships for gyms right now and amusement parks. I need to get that settled. I guess it's common to miss out on those payments and happens to be honest. I also need to complete my car registration. I still haven't got that out of the way. It's just catching up with bills pretty much. That's the only thing I really need to work on to keep it going.
I also need to complete the computer courses I paid for now. There's no refund from them, and I'm heavily interested in them so would be dumb to keep on procrastinating with having fun even though it feels like a contradiction. I guess I'll have to be manly here because I do want to earn more and move out of my parent's comfortable mansion by going to some place better and start laughing at them when I pick up a girlfriend who isn't the race they want me to marry. I'll still be laughing if I get the race they want but she might not be the type they want me to marry.
It's cool I know and a lot of people are into it, I know. Guys with my similar attitude approach me and talk to me about it. I can only share so much you know and it's a competition after all to hog all the money, so helping a little guy out with just a few tips here and there help reinforce the brain with sound techniques that have to be done in order to keep on winning all that money! It's common sense with the way I'm also acting, and I even blew off a guy too who was about trying to make me encourage others to be lazy and make me feel like they are my boss. I'm not having it and making them work for the money, if they want in so badly. I'm also a highly competitive person when I get angry so yeah, I'll be nice and law-abiding citizen - yeah right, if I can't get away with it and keep staring at all those cops and everybody else who gets on my bad side with dirty looks they don't want to see from me.
What I need to add in is maintaining all of my bills. I'm skipping just the minor ones like monthly memberships for gyms right now and amusement parks. I need to get that settled. I guess it's common to miss out on those payments and happens to be honest. I also need to complete my car registration. I still haven't got that out of the way. It's just catching up with bills pretty much. That's the only thing I really need to work on to keep it going.
I also need to complete the computer courses I paid for now. There's no refund from them, and I'm heavily interested in them so would be dumb to keep on procrastinating with having fun even though it feels like a contradiction. I guess I'll have to be manly here because I do want to earn more and move out of my parent's comfortable mansion by going to some place better and start laughing at them when I pick up a girlfriend who isn't the race they want me to marry. I'll still be laughing if I get the race they want but she might not be the type they want me to marry.
Plans For Marriage
It looks like a lot of times my thoughts of getting married was really hyped up and I had to deal with a major complex that I was born with. My parents can't really do anything about it, and no matter how hard they tried it still does play a factor. I'm seen upon honestly as a pretty good guy but it can be seen as weird for my appearance because there are plenty of shallow people in this world and even though most of them aren't going that far to keep up in this lifetime, it still plays a role in how they judge others and most likely hoping for themselves, they want to hang on to some influence. I'm quite good at proving people wrong and not necessarily with only the shallow ones. On occasions, I have put them up to challenges they have failed to follow through with, after I decided to hold back on it from not feeling right for a long time about many things.
It's weird in that I was on cruise control for most of those years while I was holding back and not feeling sure about stuff. Gosh, it's so annoying and wants to drive you crazy or that's how it was for my personality. Along with that, I had a complex from being physically short all my life compared to everybody else. My parents couldn't do anything about it, no matter what they said, I was never satisfied. They don't consider themselves to be top class and they do have some oddities for the most part or that's how I feel about them at least. They weren't great leaders with me for the most part because they were focused on other stuff and somewhere along the lines, decided to let me figure out my own life.
Well, I'm still living with my occasionally crazy parents. I'm a work in progress and this is what's keeping me from settling down. The easiest thing would be to find a Korean chick with a lifestyle and desires I'm dramatically into and also finds me hot enough to enjoy lots of it! I get along with girls easily- it's just that I'm not sure about committing to any of them so far because of a few noticeable flaws or the intangibles keep on getting to me. Wow, I kept on having some nice opportunities and it's something I can laugh about now from getting over my complexes as I keep on aging by living my life while working at thinking normally these days. I might have another good one right now even, how cool and funny is that!
It's weird in that I was on cruise control for most of those years while I was holding back and not feeling sure about stuff. Gosh, it's so annoying and wants to drive you crazy or that's how it was for my personality. Along with that, I had a complex from being physically short all my life compared to everybody else. My parents couldn't do anything about it, no matter what they said, I was never satisfied. They don't consider themselves to be top class and they do have some oddities for the most part or that's how I feel about them at least. They weren't great leaders with me for the most part because they were focused on other stuff and somewhere along the lines, decided to let me figure out my own life.
Well, I'm still living with my occasionally crazy parents. I'm a work in progress and this is what's keeping me from settling down. The easiest thing would be to find a Korean chick with a lifestyle and desires I'm dramatically into and also finds me hot enough to enjoy lots of it! I get along with girls easily- it's just that I'm not sure about committing to any of them so far because of a few noticeable flaws or the intangibles keep on getting to me. Wow, I kept on having some nice opportunities and it's something I can laugh about now from getting over my complexes as I keep on aging by living my life while working at thinking normally these days. I might have another good one right now even, how cool and funny is that!
Anime Watching Hobbies
It looks like I'm a total sucker for watching anime that's about action-packed fighting with humans in mechs. Along with that, the story of an ordinary and nice guy who just got lucky and commands the attention of a really pretty and unique love interest keeps watching the episodes so fun and moving it along. Anime can be a very creative art form and explore different types of good and bad people who are out there, even though it's all fantasy. It's funny that you can learn a few things off of it and even relate the personality of a character to someone you know in real life.
I mean it would be cool if I could mix all pleasure with work, but I also have other interests in life and if I don't put my attention to those things then I'll be missing out on opportunities to make easy money. It's good that I don't have a lot on the line for me right now and that I'm feeling the tension from practicing like it's some sort of game and trying to win at it.
The real world situation is that I'm a pretty nice guy and nowhere near the ordinary person in this world we were supposed to turn out to be. I guess that's why it makes sense I don't have a girlfriend and get along with only certain types of people. Putting myself out there, it's been fun and I still have yet to make a move with dating the right person. I think I may have found them already several times, but it turns out that I just wait too long all the time. I'll explore more about this on my next post.
I mean it would be cool if I could mix all pleasure with work, but I also have other interests in life and if I don't put my attention to those things then I'll be missing out on opportunities to make easy money. It's good that I don't have a lot on the line for me right now and that I'm feeling the tension from practicing like it's some sort of game and trying to win at it.
The real world situation is that I'm a pretty nice guy and nowhere near the ordinary person in this world we were supposed to turn out to be. I guess that's why it makes sense I don't have a girlfriend and get along with only certain types of people. Putting myself out there, it's been fun and I still have yet to make a move with dating the right person. I think I may have found them already several times, but it turns out that I just wait too long all the time. I'll explore more about this on my next post.
Friday, June 14, 2019
Knowing What You Want
Well, this blog has turned into something personal where I'm just sharing things that I would feel comfortable about while having some anonymity. I don't think I'm really that controversial though because I'm always trying to go for some decency. I'm going to share what I know that I want with myself so far. It's really that simple.
I would like to finish up my online classes for becoming a software engineer and to manage projects effectively while being creative and giving the customers what they want. I'm also trying to get stronger by learning more about investing. My swing trading has been looking good so far this month. It's two weeks in a row with profiting and it looks like I could be netting a three months showing sooner or later. What's cool is that the way I'm modeling my trades so far has been working the majority of time and bringing in a decent chunk of change. I'm pretty excited and want to do more eventually by learning to trade also other financial markets like stocks and options.
On top of getting going with my ideal way of making a living, I would like to be pretty athletic like have a nice six pack with some muscles and practically a masculine beach body I would be happy and also end up with a decent and physically attractive lady or just beautiful to me in general- doesn't matter how as long as I'm happy. There is a lady I'm friends with and seriously enjoy as a person and it doesn't have anything to do with her outward appearance and I might be feeling it with wanting to go all the way with her and be so passionate in the relationship too.
I would like to top off my time with also spending it with nice friends and even having room to meet more of those nice people and to even hang out and have good laughs or some fun. I definitely need to build a lot of confidence in myself so I'm going to have to hit the gym more often and start cooking more. Basically, be adept at all the little things that make me a bigger man and also some things I think ladies like and can personally handle. The Bible is also always going to be a part of my life. I'm listening to it with an app and has cool music and Hollywood actors reading the passages. It's beautifully acted, but I'm still not paying attention to it and thinking about my own stuff that makes me happy. I mean I get carried away but it's something I'm going to have to just deal with.
I would like to finish up my online classes for becoming a software engineer and to manage projects effectively while being creative and giving the customers what they want. I'm also trying to get stronger by learning more about investing. My swing trading has been looking good so far this month. It's two weeks in a row with profiting and it looks like I could be netting a three months showing sooner or later. What's cool is that the way I'm modeling my trades so far has been working the majority of time and bringing in a decent chunk of change. I'm pretty excited and want to do more eventually by learning to trade also other financial markets like stocks and options.
On top of getting going with my ideal way of making a living, I would like to be pretty athletic like have a nice six pack with some muscles and practically a masculine beach body I would be happy and also end up with a decent and physically attractive lady or just beautiful to me in general- doesn't matter how as long as I'm happy. There is a lady I'm friends with and seriously enjoy as a person and it doesn't have anything to do with her outward appearance and I might be feeling it with wanting to go all the way with her and be so passionate in the relationship too.
I would like to top off my time with also spending it with nice friends and even having room to meet more of those nice people and to even hang out and have good laughs or some fun. I definitely need to build a lot of confidence in myself so I'm going to have to hit the gym more often and start cooking more. Basically, be adept at all the little things that make me a bigger man and also some things I think ladies like and can personally handle. The Bible is also always going to be a part of my life. I'm listening to it with an app and has cool music and Hollywood actors reading the passages. It's beautifully acted, but I'm still not paying attention to it and thinking about my own stuff that makes me happy. I mean I get carried away but it's something I'm going to have to just deal with.
Tuesday, June 11, 2019
I See My Issue
It's always been a part of me, but I have a hard time focusing because I always want to have fun. If it's my time to study, I'm just thinking about other things and wanting to procrastinate the whole time. From reading my last post, it says that it's just being done for the short run, so what I really struggle with is being positive and committed to personal discipline. I should just keep on going with it until something comes up or bumps me along to another path.
I'm going to just live for being positive about my aspirations and keep going at it even if I feel lazy about it. There's always a next time with reading stuff on the Internet or watching movies and TV, even if it's not going to be in the preferred outlet. Overall, it's all about just being positive and sticking to something that I want to experience in the end after all of that grinding takes place. It's about having self-discipline and by knowing myself, all my anger is really rooted with being my competitive drive.
I'm going to just live for being positive about my aspirations and keep going at it even if I feel lazy about it. There's always a next time with reading stuff on the Internet or watching movies and TV, even if it's not going to be in the preferred outlet. Overall, it's all about just being positive and sticking to something that I want to experience in the end after all of that grinding takes place. It's about having self-discipline and by knowing myself, all my anger is really rooted with being my competitive drive.
Making Decisions To Not Regret
This is something that I'm writing for myself and may seem really off from trying to tap into my subconscious thoughts and intentions. I naturally feel like being lazy and not doing much to bother with a lost cause now. Something underneath me says it's wrong to hold back from wanting to be lazy, but you have to work hard and be brave about the situation. All this anger underneath me is really translating into something very competitive for what I want and feel a strong passion for. I may not be that lucky, but I'm going to keep hanging in there.
I ended up skipping everything yesterday to watch the NBA Finals game, and it was a very entertaining game to be honest. I don't think I can really afford this luxury when I should be doing something else to get going with my life. There's always reruns I can purchase to relive the moment whenever I can afford to and probably by then I will have already forgotten about it. In the short run, it's about living for the moment and feeling that escape from excitement. I should be more worried about maintaining a personal discipline with a positive outlook in life. It's a struggle but I think the effort is really worth it in the end. In the end, I think it's pretty sexy to be like this so I might as well commit to it and see where I can get to with it.
I ended up skipping everything yesterday to watch the NBA Finals game, and it was a very entertaining game to be honest. I don't think I can really afford this luxury when I should be doing something else to get going with my life. There's always reruns I can purchase to relive the moment whenever I can afford to and probably by then I will have already forgotten about it. In the short run, it's about living for the moment and feeling that escape from excitement. I should be more worried about maintaining a personal discipline with a positive outlook in life. It's a struggle but I think the effort is really worth it in the end. In the end, I think it's pretty sexy to be like this so I might as well commit to it and see where I can get to with it.
Personal Perception With Social Media
I don't think people in high numbers in general really care about what I have to say on Facebook. It must be that if a person has or wants to act up about something with me, it's because he or she is struggling with letting go of something that really doesn't have much resemblance with the real world. They are just having trouble managing their own personal negative emotions which has nothing to deal with me. It may be annoying to have to go through the unnecessary trouble like being stuck with having to attend a high school you don't want to go to anymore, even though you are smart enough to study and pass the graduation exam already early. Yet, it's always a brilliant thing to put on a strong effort and get over that hurdle.
Talking about it with others around and having a true purpose with getting somewhere with that person who feels like a victim with you over really nothing is embarrassing for that person. They probably thought about something that has stressed them out in the past and let themselves get there because the other person just doesn't want to let up and wants to stick to his or her stance. There's nothing wrong about it. They are only human and talking about it some more with them is going to make them suffer because it's naturally an embarrassing thing for them to endure. If that person is engaged in this unwilling discussion, then he or she is going to have to learn to toughen up or face some embarrassing consequences. In the end of all of this, it's nice for the opponent to still be friendly with them even though they are going to outplayed by him from being more competitive. Basically, it's about making a point and going for it while knowing that you can really never lose to these types of people.
Talking about it with others around and having a true purpose with getting somewhere with that person who feels like a victim with you over really nothing is embarrassing for that person. They probably thought about something that has stressed them out in the past and let themselves get there because the other person just doesn't want to let up and wants to stick to his or her stance. There's nothing wrong about it. They are only human and talking about it some more with them is going to make them suffer because it's naturally an embarrassing thing for them to endure. If that person is engaged in this unwilling discussion, then he or she is going to have to learn to toughen up or face some embarrassing consequences. In the end of all of this, it's nice for the opponent to still be friendly with them even though they are going to outplayed by him from being more competitive. Basically, it's about making a point and going for it while knowing that you can really never lose to these types of people.
Nice Update
Reliving how my trades went from yesterday after overtrading a lot, it turns out that it wasn't that bad for me. I received more confirmation of how I should be modeling my trades and this one moving average that I have in place is turning out to be such a blessing for me. It's totally adding up for me these days and I'm also experimenting with using a local maximum of ATR(14) to calculate the stop loss. With the volatility being pretty good in Forex, I already have a pair that has almost doubled its target from leaving it running for only a day. What I believe is really important when it comes to swing trading is to also find some confirmation with a higher timeframe. Looking at the 4-hour and daily charts have hit the sweet spot for me.
Overall, it's turning out to be nice with working at picking up this skill to trade. I'm also going to meetups now that emphasize this whole passive income lifestyle from learning to be successful from trading different financial markets. Hopefully, I'll be able to reach something comfortable where I wouldn't have to worry about coming into work for a regular job someday. In the meantime, I need to back this up in case anything terrible happens so I will choose software engineering with an emphasis on video games and phone apps. Hopefully, I'll be able to put in a lot of hard work and get rich off of doing these things that I have come to enjoy.
Overall, it's turning out to be nice with working at picking up this skill to trade. I'm also going to meetups now that emphasize this whole passive income lifestyle from learning to be successful from trading different financial markets. Hopefully, I'll be able to reach something comfortable where I wouldn't have to worry about coming into work for a regular job someday. In the meantime, I need to back this up in case anything terrible happens so I will choose software engineering with an emphasis on video games and phone apps. Hopefully, I'll be able to put in a lot of hard work and get rich off of doing these things that I have come to enjoy.
Monday, June 10, 2019
Organizing My Actual Plans
Well, it looks like it's taking my third attempt to really write about my plans with the general overview. The other posts were something I wrote to just have fun communicating about to anyone or anything out there and willing to read them. I have actually found some enjoyment out of writing about my personal life and have to lay a complaint that it gets a little annoying to constantly see the words "I", "my", and "me" very often in my posts! I am rereading all of this and it's just pretty much a personal narrative that I'm writing about the whole time. It's all about keeping it true even though it feels like I'm being so self-absorbed about all of this.
Honestly, I feel like what I'm lacking is getting things right the first time and having to go through all of those struggles. There's really nothing about it, and I'm not so much panicking anymore if my life is like going to be over, so I don't know now if it's just plain stupid or being courageous. I definitely feel at peace and so I went off again besides getting to my point of topic. I'm going to have to be cut and dry so here it is:
Personal Algorithm of Making Decisions Currently
1. Go on meetups and pull up events that pertain to my interest level for gaining inspiration to finish out my software engineering and project management related courses. Also go to meetups that are related to learning about investing with trades.
2. If nothing is available for #1, look for meetups that relate to being inspired to workout like hiking, playing tennis, or volleyball and project if enough cute or hot women will be there at that meetup. If not, go for the standard gym to not waste membership!
3. Look to be social with friends and to go on dates if I get to be lucky that week.
4. After coming back from a meetup, go to the regular gym if I can make it.
5. Get ready for the next day and work on completing the classes until I tire out or feel bored of them that I do something else.
Honestly, I feel like what I'm lacking is getting things right the first time and having to go through all of those struggles. There's really nothing about it, and I'm not so much panicking anymore if my life is like going to be over, so I don't know now if it's just plain stupid or being courageous. I definitely feel at peace and so I went off again besides getting to my point of topic. I'm going to have to be cut and dry so here it is:
Personal Algorithm of Making Decisions Currently
1. Go on meetups and pull up events that pertain to my interest level for gaining inspiration to finish out my software engineering and project management related courses. Also go to meetups that are related to learning about investing with trades.
2. If nothing is available for #1, look for meetups that relate to being inspired to workout like hiking, playing tennis, or volleyball and project if enough cute or hot women will be there at that meetup. If not, go for the standard gym to not waste membership!
3. Look to be social with friends and to go on dates if I get to be lucky that week.
4. After coming back from a meetup, go to the regular gym if I can make it.
5. Get ready for the next day and work on completing the classes until I tire out or feel bored of them that I do something else.
Organizing Personal Time With Effort
I'm looking to go to meetups for inspiration to finish out my software engineering courses I'm really interested in completing for the knowledge and to also go into a side business of developing apps in hopes of giving the users what they want and to get some good money off of it. This will also increase my professional experience and I will have some skills to also present to other prospective employers in the future. I'm also feeling good about combining this with swing trading the Forex and now opening myself up to learning about trading stocks and options while trying to master the first one to begin with.
I am seriously realizing this is what I want to do and it's just kicking itself into gear. Well, there is a girl out there who I really like as a person and she said she likes hanging out with me too. I can tell we like each other quite a bit and have room to grow really attracted to each other. I don't really care so much about how cute she looks on the outward but feel great underneath from spending time and getting to know her. She's a really cool person to me, and I totally dig her personality. She's currently dating someone I know, and I don't really mind it. I'll just have to wait and see what happens between those two. I don't really think my situation sucks either because there are other opportunities to meet different types of women from finding and joining in with social mixers. I think bringing a buddy along who is a girl sort of hinders me from putting myself out there with the more pretty ladies I could get to know, so I might have to go to those meetings by myself now and without her presence to be supportive of me. I know I could always talk to her and a few other lady friends after to discuss about anything regarding my dating problems.
I am seriously realizing this is what I want to do and it's just kicking itself into gear. Well, there is a girl out there who I really like as a person and she said she likes hanging out with me too. I can tell we like each other quite a bit and have room to grow really attracted to each other. I don't really care so much about how cute she looks on the outward but feel great underneath from spending time and getting to know her. She's a really cool person to me, and I totally dig her personality. She's currently dating someone I know, and I don't really mind it. I'll just have to wait and see what happens between those two. I don't really think my situation sucks either because there are other opportunities to meet different types of women from finding and joining in with social mixers. I think bringing a buddy along who is a girl sort of hinders me from putting myself out there with the more pretty ladies I could get to know, so I might have to go to those meetings by myself now and without her presence to be supportive of me. I know I could always talk to her and a few other lady friends after to discuss about anything regarding my dating problems.
Patching Things Up
It looks like I'm learning to prioritize my interests a lot better now. It does take some effort to put yourself in motion and attempt to get things done in a productive fashion. I have been categorizing my interests into three basic things with a lot of details going into each one. I still remember my three main ones in the beginning: Bible, exercise, and learning to trade successfully.
Nowadays, I listen to the Bible by default whenever I'm driving around by myself. I hardly play it when I have a passenger with me, unless maybe it's that one girl who hangs out with me often. She tolerates all that boredom and likes to fall asleep a lot so yeah, I'm glad she doesn't mind it so much. I'm already listening to the whole Bible for my fifth time on repeat in the last two or three years and yes, I have spent plenty of time driving solo everyday.
I haven't really been hitting the gym as much as I would like to. I have been more like running outdoors and emphasizing cardio to burn off calories and keep myself from getting too fat. A few people think I'm buff even though I haven't lifted weights in awhile. I'm thinking of getting myself back into it because I already do plenty of walking and running for maintaining the pounds.
It looks like I'm going to meetups now that relate to my goals with career advancement. Mainly, I'm interested in obtaining a lot of passive income via swing trading and investments. I'm trying to master Forex right now and later on, I'll be adding on other things to invest in once I can earn consistent money with great discipline. My secondary career I'm looking for is to be a software engineer or project manager dealing with the video game industry. I think I will have so much fun coding in that field and feeling blessed to be part of a cool team while also having fun competing with other players off the game I helped to develop for only personal pleasure. I'm not riding all my hopes on this passive income thing, but it's something I'm willing to spend a significant amount of energy on.
With the career advancement aside, I'm looking to maintain myself, and then lastly just go and have fun during the weekends while looking for nice and single ladies to meet.
Nowadays, I listen to the Bible by default whenever I'm driving around by myself. I hardly play it when I have a passenger with me, unless maybe it's that one girl who hangs out with me often. She tolerates all that boredom and likes to fall asleep a lot so yeah, I'm glad she doesn't mind it so much. I'm already listening to the whole Bible for my fifth time on repeat in the last two or three years and yes, I have spent plenty of time driving solo everyday.
I haven't really been hitting the gym as much as I would like to. I have been more like running outdoors and emphasizing cardio to burn off calories and keep myself from getting too fat. A few people think I'm buff even though I haven't lifted weights in awhile. I'm thinking of getting myself back into it because I already do plenty of walking and running for maintaining the pounds.
It looks like I'm going to meetups now that relate to my goals with career advancement. Mainly, I'm interested in obtaining a lot of passive income via swing trading and investments. I'm trying to master Forex right now and later on, I'll be adding on other things to invest in once I can earn consistent money with great discipline. My secondary career I'm looking for is to be a software engineer or project manager dealing with the video game industry. I think I will have so much fun coding in that field and feeling blessed to be part of a cool team while also having fun competing with other players off the game I helped to develop for only personal pleasure. I'm not riding all my hopes on this passive income thing, but it's something I'm willing to spend a significant amount of energy on.
With the career advancement aside, I'm looking to maintain myself, and then lastly just go and have fun during the weekends while looking for nice and single ladies to meet.
Friday, June 7, 2019
Letting Myself Be Inspired
I feel much happier these days from knowing what I'm looking for in life and learning to come to terms with people who struggled with me in the past. Back then, it didn't cross my mind that they were having a hard time with me because I thought they were just being jerks and constantly testing my angry emotions. It took me long enough, so I'm just happy to have finally realized it. I can go back to being the great person I was in the past and patch up what's left in all of our friendships. We never officially did break it off with each other and just let a funny rift get between us. Okay, it's really one-sided here; I'm the better person from having figured it all out and having always taken the better road than them while unwillingly having watched them suffer because of me. In a way, I'm just so glad to know now they aren't better people than me!
I'm trying to make a run these days with making myself financially rich on my own and I have chosen swing trading to be my unique vehicle for it. On the side, I'm trying to expand on my software engineering and developing skills to also effective project management skills so I can eventually try my hands at making a future popular video game or app. I'm just looking for a one-hit wonder that will hand me passive income- that's what all my dreams of working is about. It's just that I find it exciting to be into these things.
I'm going to have to keep on looking for girls I'm interested in dating so I'm going to have keep on trying and hopefully something good will come up again for me. I just wasn't ready for it back then but I did have a few good opportunities. I could have had like four or five ex-girlfriends by now if I really compromised and went for it back then. I could have also lost my virginity too if I wanted but I didn't want it to be some random fat girl who admitted to weighing over 200 pounds and was so into me! Yuck! She kept on saying she wanted to be my girlfriend and started being annoying not being able to keep up with me like on the second date. I don't know, I wasn't comfortable with it!
I mainly have Cambodian lady friends now and they are all interested with me getting a girlfriend. I think some of the girls who have shown some sort of interest with me are like not around though and I like them too. It's like I could end up just wanting to be only friends with them and maybe they would want something better out of the relationship if I ended up choosing them. Maybe they aren't that open-minded about it with me right now because I could just show myself to not be ready for it yet. I might have to keep hanging in there to find the right girl with the mindset I'm looking for and I'm sure she's out there and very attractive too.
I'm trying to make a run these days with making myself financially rich on my own and I have chosen swing trading to be my unique vehicle for it. On the side, I'm trying to expand on my software engineering and developing skills to also effective project management skills so I can eventually try my hands at making a future popular video game or app. I'm just looking for a one-hit wonder that will hand me passive income- that's what all my dreams of working is about. It's just that I find it exciting to be into these things.
I'm going to have to keep on looking for girls I'm interested in dating so I'm going to have keep on trying and hopefully something good will come up again for me. I just wasn't ready for it back then but I did have a few good opportunities. I could have had like four or five ex-girlfriends by now if I really compromised and went for it back then. I could have also lost my virginity too if I wanted but I didn't want it to be some random fat girl who admitted to weighing over 200 pounds and was so into me! Yuck! She kept on saying she wanted to be my girlfriend and started being annoying not being able to keep up with me like on the second date. I don't know, I wasn't comfortable with it!
I mainly have Cambodian lady friends now and they are all interested with me getting a girlfriend. I think some of the girls who have shown some sort of interest with me are like not around though and I like them too. It's like I could end up just wanting to be only friends with them and maybe they would want something better out of the relationship if I ended up choosing them. Maybe they aren't that open-minded about it with me right now because I could just show myself to not be ready for it yet. I might have to keep hanging in there to find the right girl with the mindset I'm looking for and I'm sure she's out there and very attractive too.
Nice Week Of Trading
This is my first week in a long while after wildly swing trading last month and losing the majority of the time, I have been profitable from the trade selections I made. I ended up making some adjustments to my trading methodology and rolled with it to see what happens. It's been fairly predicting nice profitable outcomes and at least, I haven't been stopping out before the whole day closes. I'm going to see if I can keep this up for the next week now and if not then no worries, I'm going to keep on making adjustments until I get there for three months straight of profitable trading.
The tools I have found are readily accessible from searching on the web, and I have learned that it caters to my personal preferences. I'm pretty much just looking to be a trend follower for at least a day and the more days it keeps going the merrier. I'm basically combining a whole bunch of ideas I have learned about and modeling my trades based on the success I can obtain and if not, I'm just making adjustments while struggling. It looks like I'm going back to the trend following indicators I started out with and put some time into to try to learn even though I understood nothing back then. By itself, it's really not enough so I have combined it with more interesting ideas I have learned about and fortunately, it was a stroke of luck that I remembered an indicator I tested a long time ago and that's the one I'm using today.
The tools I have found are readily accessible from searching on the web, and I have learned that it caters to my personal preferences. I'm pretty much just looking to be a trend follower for at least a day and the more days it keeps going the merrier. I'm basically combining a whole bunch of ideas I have learned about and modeling my trades based on the success I can obtain and if not, I'm just making adjustments while struggling. It looks like I'm going back to the trend following indicators I started out with and put some time into to try to learn even though I understood nothing back then. By itself, it's really not enough so I have combined it with more interesting ideas I have learned about and fortunately, it was a stroke of luck that I remembered an indicator I tested a long time ago and that's the one I'm using today.
Hindrances To Achieving Success
The biggest obstacle I face in life with getting to where I want to is falling asleep on my chair while procrastinating- that is all! It's a hilarious statement and at the moment, I have to achieve better time management and expect myself to get bored and just fall asleep any moment even though it wasn't my intention. For example, I realized that while driving for 90 minutes yesterday, I was trying to listen to a well voice-acted dramatization of the Bible and was still phasing in and out. I managed to finish listening to what I could with the whole Bible two days ago and then started all over. It's going to be my fifth time around. I'm guessing by the time I get to a thousand times of listening to the whole Bible, then I'll know something if I gain something out of it at all.
Overall, I think it's about filling myself with confidence and just trying while giving it my all and being manly about the disappointments that may come way. I guess I'm fearful about over-doing it and stressing out while becoming depressed. I don't want to be perceived in a negative way either, but there are plenty of negative people out there already for the most ridiculous reason. I have a whole crowd against me too! Oh well, I'm not going to be able to rely on people too much then to find my personal motivation for becoming successful with the things I'm interested in. I'll just hope with great confidence while building perseverance from good character to begin with.
Wednesday, June 5, 2019
Nice Message
I feel blessed for finally figuring it out after only like eight years passed by. It's not bad and could have been worse like towards the end of my life. I seriously had some wonderful ties with a nice Christian lady at the old church where Lee decided to go bonkers with me on. They both had their share of struggles with me, a restless guy from who was down in the dumps because a friend turned sour from losing control after I wrote something about him that ticked him off so badly and shared it to people. He's a drama queen and turned paranoid when I didn't let up with my stance. He was being a pain to me at the time, while talking negative about people behind their backs. I wasn't much a fan for it and it really aggravated me that I decided to post it on an old blog. I don't feel like searching for it and so no one is really going to message me to put it up here. I just know how this blog works and all these readers who come on it.
The special lady deleted me as a Facebook friend but she's such a nice Christian that she's been responding to my messages and has been helpful in identifying past problems with the crazed sector at that old church building and agreeing with the great points I'm able to mention dealing with our faith. I am so meant for marrying a nice girlfriend someday. This is what I wrote to her:
"A big brotherly kiss on the cheeks to you and a nice pat on the back. I felt something special with you back then. You are a dime of a dozen I let get away in terms of being Facebook friends. I'm really sure if I managed to patch things up with everyone at the old church you wouldn't mind accepting me again as a Facebook friend. I still have the old part of me alive that used to get nice results with people who struggled with me. The big secret is that I wouldn't mind someone acting like I did if I behaved like they did.
I just identified how they were struggling with me from only yesterday. I've just begun and made mistakes that are ending up to be in my favor. "Come now, let us settle the matter," says the LORD. "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool. Isaiah 1:18."
What's interesting is that with the other lady who put herself into a fight with me, I wasn't this personally courteous with her and treating the matter in a very dismissive manner and telling her what to do. She didn't like it and struggled with it because it is a lot to take in, especially if I'm spilling all the bad beans about her friends she loves dearly at that church. With this special lady, I'm just so naturally nice to her so there's definitely a connection I should be looking for in my future partner. This one is already taken, and I know she likes me too but I'll keep it low key because I honor marriages and already-made commitments above anything else. I just don't go seeking to find out if she ever gets available though, so maybe I would have if I really did like everything about her and so far, I haven't really found the one like that.
The special lady deleted me as a Facebook friend but she's such a nice Christian that she's been responding to my messages and has been helpful in identifying past problems with the crazed sector at that old church building and agreeing with the great points I'm able to mention dealing with our faith. I am so meant for marrying a nice girlfriend someday. This is what I wrote to her:
"A big brotherly kiss on the cheeks to you and a nice pat on the back. I felt something special with you back then. You are a dime of a dozen I let get away in terms of being Facebook friends. I'm really sure if I managed to patch things up with everyone at the old church you wouldn't mind accepting me again as a Facebook friend. I still have the old part of me alive that used to get nice results with people who struggled with me. The big secret is that I wouldn't mind someone acting like I did if I behaved like they did.
I just identified how they were struggling with me from only yesterday. I've just begun and made mistakes that are ending up to be in my favor. "Come now, let us settle the matter," says the LORD. "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool. Isaiah 1:18."
What's interesting is that with the other lady who put herself into a fight with me, I wasn't this personally courteous with her and treating the matter in a very dismissive manner and telling her what to do. She didn't like it and struggled with it because it is a lot to take in, especially if I'm spilling all the bad beans about her friends she loves dearly at that church. With this special lady, I'm just so naturally nice to her so there's definitely a connection I should be looking for in my future partner. This one is already taken, and I know she likes me too but I'll keep it low key because I honor marriages and already-made commitments above anything else. I just don't go seeking to find out if she ever gets available though, so maybe I would have if I really did like everything about her and so far, I haven't really found the one like that.
Tuesday, June 4, 2019
Other Side Things
On top of wanting to work on friendships with people who struggle at it with me, I really want to be friends with them because it motivates me to be better than them at everything. I'm also nice to them too and will stay that way. Currently, I have a bunch of people at one location who I have finally identified to have this struggle with me and I feel blessed to realize this opportunity, but it's something I have to put on hold. I have a few greater tasks for myself that I need to accomplish first, so I'll just let it go for now to focus.
One of the things I'm heavily interested in is getting myself a girlfriend who is athletic, enthusiastic, and an overall nice lady. I would like to do these fun activities outdoor together and don't mind paying for all of it! I'm going to have to keep on building my confidence whenever I can get the chance though.
I also have good friends to hang out with lately and my own crowd which I feel very comfortable to have settled into. It's really quite nice and I don't feel pressured underneath anymore about disappointing someone as I used to. I have the confidence to do well in my personal dating relationships now. I'm definitely accepting how a lady isn't right for me if she isn't into me. I really want to focus on the future partner's happiness more than my own honestly and to look for someone who is hot and wants a lot of sex in marriage!
One of the things I'm heavily interested in is getting myself a girlfriend who is athletic, enthusiastic, and an overall nice lady. I would like to do these fun activities outdoor together and don't mind paying for all of it! I'm going to have to keep on building my confidence whenever I can get the chance though.
I also have good friends to hang out with lately and my own crowd which I feel very comfortable to have settled into. It's really quite nice and I don't feel pressured underneath anymore about disappointing someone as I used to. I have the confidence to do well in my personal dating relationships now. I'm definitely accepting how a lady isn't right for me if she isn't into me. I really want to focus on the future partner's happiness more than my own honestly and to look for someone who is hot and wants a lot of sex in marriage!
Starting Out Solid This Month
I closed a few trades out from yesterday and so far I am in the green while also having some profitable trades running today. It looks like from having over-traded last month with my demo account, it's been allowing me to figure out a trading model that will work the majority of time. I am just letting myself go while testing all of my hunches and personal thoughts about how the market is working. I really have nothing to lose here, and it's still fun while learning to make myself a competitive trader.
I have my sights really set on moving out of my parent's house this time, so I want to at least put some work into this trading gig with also developing my blue collar and 9 to 5 job of choice being software development. Ideally, I would love to make video games and in this world there are still companies paying for programmers to develop proprietary software and even if I can't get what I want in the end, it's still fulfilling for me. I have learned this is the case from the software developing I'm doing right now at my current company. Therefore, I'm basically looking for motivation to finish up my mini-master degrees so I could be on my way to ultimately become a successful video game developer.
I have my sights really set on moving out of my parent's house this time, so I want to at least put some work into this trading gig with also developing my blue collar and 9 to 5 job of choice being software development. Ideally, I would love to make video games and in this world there are still companies paying for programmers to develop proprietary software and even if I can't get what I want in the end, it's still fulfilling for me. I have learned this is the case from the software developing I'm doing right now at my current company. Therefore, I'm basically looking for motivation to finish up my mini-master degrees so I could be on my way to ultimately become a successful video game developer.
Monday, June 3, 2019
Setting Priorities Straight
I'm understanding that my number one priority is to get the heck out of living under my parent's roof at the old age of 36! I'm still unmarried and paying for high car insurance. Lately, with my circumstances and no matter how annoying it might be to me with these relatable things I feel like laughing about it.
The reason for moving out is because I want to marry whoever I want to and if I'm under their roof then I have to abide their rules of how to live life. My parents aren't the most happy people out there either, so I'm not motivated to follow after them anytime soon. To get out of the house and live comfortably, I need to earn a lot of cash and soon as possible! I'm working on it and I have chosen my ultimate goal of making a living full-time to be developing video games. It can seem pretty childish I know but video games are the only software out there I can be gung-ho about having to purchase to play. Everything else should be free and open-source software. I believe Microsoft Windows should be free also and allow for everyone to look at the code and add in funny bugs if they wish to make fun of it!
My secondary option of making money is with me hardly being at the computer and maybe around a cumulative total of one hour or add a couple more if I want to gloat to myself about how I did so well or sucked that day with making money. It's swing trading and it's an aggressive form of trading but less than day trading and yes, it's super risky and competitive and can wipe out your whole bank account in a few seconds if you are stupid. I'm not sharing my floor with the scrubs but kissing up to the hot shots.
First thing is first, I need money to get the heck out of my parent's luxurious and Beverly Hills mansion-type of house! I don't want to listen to them say marry this Korean lady I hardly know because it's time and always fight to keep her. I have met a hot Korean lady I believe will do very well with but she's hard to catch and a little anti-social so there's not much I can do at this point. My parents don't really know about her and I think they would find her to be scary and crazy too! I like her though, so it would be about my happiness and they would be getting a Korean lady for a daughter-in-law but they could end up not wanting me to marry her either. Therefore, I need to move out of this house when I can practically project myself to be a millionaire.
The reason for moving out is because I want to marry whoever I want to and if I'm under their roof then I have to abide their rules of how to live life. My parents aren't the most happy people out there either, so I'm not motivated to follow after them anytime soon. To get out of the house and live comfortably, I need to earn a lot of cash and soon as possible! I'm working on it and I have chosen my ultimate goal of making a living full-time to be developing video games. It can seem pretty childish I know but video games are the only software out there I can be gung-ho about having to purchase to play. Everything else should be free and open-source software. I believe Microsoft Windows should be free also and allow for everyone to look at the code and add in funny bugs if they wish to make fun of it!
My secondary option of making money is with me hardly being at the computer and maybe around a cumulative total of one hour or add a couple more if I want to gloat to myself about how I did so well or sucked that day with making money. It's swing trading and it's an aggressive form of trading but less than day trading and yes, it's super risky and competitive and can wipe out your whole bank account in a few seconds if you are stupid. I'm not sharing my floor with the scrubs but kissing up to the hot shots.
First thing is first, I need money to get the heck out of my parent's luxurious and Beverly Hills mansion-type of house! I don't want to listen to them say marry this Korean lady I hardly know because it's time and always fight to keep her. I have met a hot Korean lady I believe will do very well with but she's hard to catch and a little anti-social so there's not much I can do at this point. My parents don't really know about her and I think they would find her to be scary and crazy too! I like her though, so it would be about my happiness and they would be getting a Korean lady for a daughter-in-law but they could end up not wanting me to marry her either. Therefore, I need to move out of this house when I can practically project myself to be a millionaire.
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