This is a very controversial topic. I believe that God has given me free space to live at liberty to test certain options, no matter how others may think I'm crazy. It's only hopefully going to be that way momentarily. I believe it requires a lot of mind power and will to establish peace again with those you truly love, no matter how much they bother you at times.
The Bible says "Do not associate with a man given to anger." Proverbs 22:24 I think this means that no matter what people against you say to badger you, you just have to take it without talking back. Basically, for me it just means letting them know you don't agree with them by doing the cold shoulders to them whenever they bring up anything against you. Everything else should be a normal conversation. Just basically, don't argue with these people who are against you. Do not even remotely say a hint about what the subject in question is about. Say a few words to calmly express yourself and then let them rip you apart because if they do it forever then you'll know that someone could be just wasting his time with you. Seriously, do not fall to their level and start planning revenge. Let the silence treatment do the trick. When they ask a question, you don't need to answer even if you feel bad or inclined with someone clearly in opposition to you. Example, police man siding with a guest of the home calling on another former guest who annoys the heck out of him. Annoyances can end just by applying yourself on the giving end as mentioned on the last paragraph.
Let time heal itself and be on a positive-side of mind. It's about gentle persistence that will keep you from feeling bad about your etiquette. No matter where you go, silence is sometimes golden when dealing with arguments. No matter how much it hurts, just listen, while not having to agree with them, and go on your way. When people over-react and do bad stuff to you, just apologize to them and let them know you will keep coming back to sort it out. Work on other things to keep your mind off of this, as it could turn into an endless obsession. Let go of feelings of anger and bitterness and fear of being rejected or conceiving threats.
When it's about going to be the giving end, you need to approach them and initially read any sign of feeling discomfort. If this happens, you just supposedly walk away from them. Come back and follow up with them in a loving manner. Say only one neutral sentence that explains your position. When you ask questions and these people stop answering them, then I think it's an indicator that they are willing to side with you. Just don't persist with the same questions and help them to recovery and give them gentle support. Timing is your best friend when dealing with problems with people. Time is always on your side as long as your heart is filled with the right intent. Also remember that God is longing to open His heart for you to use with others who can be bothersome to you.
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