In California law, Civil Restraining Orders are harassment orders filed to a state court by a complainer to another person. The thing about it is that it rules independently from criminal charges and is more taken as issuing a warning to the other person. In other words, it's like saying "I'm going to sue you if you come close to me when I told you to leave me alone."
I totally understand what my problem was after receiving two of them. Everybody who has ever had a restraining order has a different case, but I know what my problem was. I was just too emotionally fueled and unprepared to handle people telling me to leave them alone. In other words, I was just so angry at them that I kept on bugging them until they couldn't handle it anymore and filed these court orders on me.
Now, people are like all afraid of me for different reasons because I walk this Earth and live and talk among others in this civilization. Definitely, I get truly left alone and have a lot of free time to myself after getting off from work. Nobody comes over to my house to try to stalk me or anything. Not like I ever did that, which makes my image even more worse to the friends of the affected victims.
Basically, I was just holding a grudge and didn't know how to deal with it properly so I kept on making mistakes on how to smoothly resolve it with another person. I was just so lost and didn't know where to take the direction. Nowadays, I understand totally that I just had to manage letting go of my grudge and that's all it took for me. I had all of these interesting emotions that just comes from being human.
The restraining orders came from me being angry at a guy who wouldn't keep his mouth shut after telling me to leave him alone. I was going to honor them fully while thinking about how to resolve things with him, but when he opened his mouth to my friend- that just created this great fury inside of me temporarily. I was wrong to feel angry and not explain my actions with the poor guy. That was my problem, I should just made him look a bad person and tell him what he shouldn't do and then he would have forced himself to drop any "drama queen" emotions he had with me.
It all started with me wanting to fit in with another group and trying to make him look good. He just didn't get it and was acting like a drama queen. I then just became angry at him for keeping on opening his mouth and saying bad things about me and what I felt wasn't true so that's what he gets which is looking like a sissy with me.
Academy of Scrappy Credible Undergraduate Desire
