That's what I'm going for then. I like the feeling of struggling now and being angry and worried about stuff. It makes life worth something to struggle after. I think in those moments of desperation, I just need to man up and suck it up and just continue to work at it. Even though my brain isn't feeling good about doing it and it would easier to just relax, I need to just stress it a little better in managing my own time and being productive on a daily basis. It's going to be something that's long term for me.
I'm not really that lucky, even though I saw some opportunities in the past and let them go. Actually those opportunities weren't fully what I was looking for anyway. I think maybe God or myself has been holding them back for a reason. Maybe, I'm not meant to go that route and I need to just change myself for the better. That's what I'm going to go after now.
