Becoming Consistent

Let's see, I'm going to try something.

Watching games on TV, it was so-so. Watching anime for a little bit, it was great, but what about using that time for something better? Okay check.

Reading up on near death experiences and other crazy, mystical stuff that tries to use science. Awesome! It made me tired and I had to sleep and then I finished reading up on it.

I'm still a young pup and reading can bring me up to speed! The Lord is number one in my life so He's the only one I really need to go to for support and I can just get used to that, while using my daily walk as a platform for obeying His commands and to gain better understanding of His ways in them and to carry them out.

Fixing Concentration

I think the best way to work on my concentration when I just want to be not at my best game and distracted with other stuff, is to just read more. I think reading is the best way to cure my disease for not being able to concentrate for long periods of time.

Also for secondary purposes, I think it's good to work out as well too and try out healthy projects just to keep yourself busy. I guess keeping the self busy and trying to go out of your own to meet more people can be fun. Getting rid of social anxiety is important too, so it can all add up in the end.

Meh

I feel like meh when it comes to trying to guess a woman's age now.

I don't feel like asking because she might get offended. A girl says don't ask what a girl's age is. I don't do it twice.

With some girls who are my friends, I ask them away and they don't care. It's like the ones you are dating, you can't really ask what their age is! Oh man, what a double standard. Some girls I have hung out with asked me what my age is. I asked what hers was and she said, "No, don't ask a girl!"

Meh, sometimes the same girl can look young and other times her face looks like it's been aging quite a bit. It seems like a girl who says she's around her twenties are attractive looking and seem to look around my age, but when I look at a lady who is like around my age, man I see a huge difference in age wrinkles and everything.

It's now just meh when it comes to dating women based on their age. If she reveals her age for me, then great, but if I fall hopelessly in love with her and find out she's like 65 with a body of a gorgeous 30 year old, what can I really do?

Probably the Reason for Being Treated Okay

When I see people, I see faces and not my own face. I have my own perfect vision so far to work with and my eyes are like wide-awake and feel innocent about stuff and just this pleasant feeling inside of me just wants to rise out of me!

It's like, I get this feeling of hey, I'm actually doing this every once in awhile! I can't like constantly have a mirror in front of me and see myself. I just have this personal conscience; it's actually something I've come to accept. I'm not really feeling so hampered anymore and neither am I feeling really self-limited.

Concentration At Work

What is killing me a little is that my mind doesn't want to be focused at work, so I have to force myself to let out the stupid things that constantly want to keep me occupied. There are a lot of good stuff that I treasure and will linger in my head as well, but I need to learn to push it aside so that I can perform at my maximum potential and be a great asset to a company that I feel blessed to be a part of.

I feel like a kid, so it's a bummer! I wish I studied my hardest all throughout high school and got into a great school and just naturally developed a great sense of concentration that goes beyond the amount of two, average people put together!

Well, it's too late and I can't look back and build a time machine to make some angry people think differently about me. I'm not going to back it up with any more details, but I can say that I finally moved on from it and wish them the best without any animosity or ill-will.

An Area of Regret

I made a promise to God that I want to go back on now. The saying goes from the Bible, it is to be careful about what you solemnly swear to the Lord. One guy in the Old Testament ended up burning his beautiful daughter to the stake because he made a promise to God that he would sacrifice the first thing he saw for the Lord. Maybe his dog should have ran past his daughter, but that's a really sad story.

I made this promise and now I feel like regretting it! My promise is to make a million dollars and get a six-pack and then visit a church that feels antsy about me being there. I'm just going to tell them what I'm doing and just walk out.

Yeah, I have been struggling with this inferiority complex of feeling short at the height of being only 5' 3" but yet everybody doesn't seem to really mind my short height. I don't seem to get discriminated because of my height, and I have even offended people from the stuff I wrote to them unwittingly and scared some too!

Basically, I can't go back on this promise I made to God because it's like hard wired in me to become a successful millionaire and get a six-pack. I have a decent job and plenty of time to practice my skills for becoming a financially independent and wealthy person.

Better Time Management

The area of time management is something I have slightly struggled with. I have been working out and losing like 8% body fat in the last twenty days which isn't that bad. I am just filled with a lot of energy as well right now.

The few areas I would like to fix are pretty much just eliminating the small amount of time I spend watching T.V. which is mainly for the reruns of all the major sports that are played. I guess I can stop munching on beef jerky now while just sitting there and looking at games especially when I can just check up the scores of who won and lost. It's pretty much a done deal already for me, so I don't really know why I still want to be entertained from watching games where I know the outcome sometimes.

My Ego

I have a really big, goody two-shoe ego with myself. I look down on others who argue with me and can bother them to the point that they don't want to talk about something with me. I have realized that I don't really need to associate with those negative and anger-provoking people.

I'm starting to become so much smoother in communicating and it's just going with the flow these days with being like a nice force of nature. I say a lot of things sometimes really vague that need to be clarified. Some of the things I say can literally tick people off. It's really best for me to not to talk about those situations anymore because I realize that I am the stronger person and can live like that while letting them go.

Becoming Better At Texting

I have had some rough beginnings in socializing with people through text messaging. Sometimes, individuals just have a hard time not letting themselves get worked up and just like to go crazy with their beliefs and try to act like a force of nature. In other words, they just get super mad and not admit to it. I have like the ultimate defense now in that I can say they have an inferiority complex out of my height and just keep talking about that as my focal point. It's a pretty hard defense to do because it seems like I am ridiculing myself, so it requires a lot of sense of humor, confidence, and humility to pull off a justification like that on anybody who is just flaring.

Another thing to do could be just letting time pass on by and then talking to them about it again. If they are still worked up over it, you can just make fun of them about not letting go of the past. Basically, the best course of attack is just being a nice person and communicating about how you don't care what they did and wanting to still be friends with them. This is like throwing a curve ball because you can say stuff about how crazy they are, and they won't be able to do anything back at you, and they will be left speechless. Also, they are not going to want to do anything with you because they would be afraid of hurting you, so it all works out for the better balance in nature! 

Okay, so I have gained a good load of experience and I have this high level of comfort with communicating properly now and approaching my ways of texting sentences by not going too far these days. In a way, I've been learning more proper etiquette from dealing with sensitive people and having put with stupid things that they were about doing. I was oblivious but now I'm ready to be like a tour de force.

Setting Goals for Hard Things Might Be Worth It

I have these crazy goals of mine that never get tiring to achieve. My main desires are basically what I have saying all the time and will continue repeating, becoming a millionaire with a six-pack and having a close Biblical fellowship with God while married to a beautiful and fulfilling Christian wife!

I guess it's not hard for everybody to want that. It's just that how strong is the desire and confidence of the people to obtain those things. It seems like a lot of people would rather benefit off of me being their friend more than them going through the pains of life to obtain what they want.

It's hard and I understand that, so it sort of makes me laugh these days when I'm feeling really stable in my life when others are having a hard time and expressing it in some way with me. I mean it's not hard for me to try to be a friend to them and help them out in the best way possible. I guess that's why it's really important for me to always be a stable person and not act out in my anger and aggression which will always be tempting for me because I could screw somebody up badly from his or her own perspective.

Back To My Roots

I'm once again reminded of not playing poker for money because you have to sit there, and it does give me the feeling of things being tedious. I prefer the currency and stock trading environment because I can just sleep while letting it make money for me and then I can go off and try other activities that I think would be fun or interesting to try.

Right now, I'm looking to be a profitable currency trader on my own without really anybody helping me out. I just have my own way of wanting to do things. If I can make that happen, then I want to expand the knowledge upon about learning to deal with stocks as well. This is going to be a longer journey than I thought for my dream to achieving my status of becoming a financially-independent millionaire.

Sour Trading Month

I guess I started out strong and then I blew my profit by trading so much over-zealously without even monitoring those trades. Instead of watching the market for what happened, I just let it ride and forgot about it completely and then the profit went back into the negatives! Fortunately, I'm just dealing with a demo account.

I've decided to trade aggressively with just nine pairs now instead of original twenty-four pairs I was looking at. It seems to make more sense because I would be working with the most common ones and reading up on the economies of countries that I'm actually most interested in getting updated about so I can make some sensible investments. It's back to square one for me again.

Simple Stuff

I'm actually trying to get stronger so I have really got myself into rock climbing. Once I did it a few times, it just became so much stuff that I just want to keep on doing it. I guess my personal life is getting more interesting because I'm doing stuff to just keep myself busy, instead of compromising with things that I don't really have much of a heart for anymore.

I do really need to work on a design document though for a project that I have in mind of doing with some friends. I'm going after creating a pretty funny app that others can enjoy! It's just really all about having fun and learning something cool off of it while working with a team. The idea just sounds really cool that I'm glad other guys in interested with helping out in it.

This Message Worked For Me

Using all the principles I learned, I wrote this pretty engaging letter in a short amount of time. I have heard the same arguments and pretty much was able to counter right back at them. I am not getting any problem from this crazy girl ever again in the future. I just filled it in on Facebook, so just copying and pasting it. This is my message:

"Sometimes people like to stay mad, but it's wrong to be that way. Living in the present means letting go of grudges and inviting others to just be friends. I invite you to be my friend because it's one of my best qualities that you have been dealing with all this time. I don't care how crazy you think you are. Sometimes, it's just instinctual for others to know their limits with pushing the envelope. It can be a good thing because it can cause a positive change for people, whether big or small.

You appear to be struggling with trust issues and an inferiority complex. I'm shorter than you.

A shorter person wrote something that has no actual meaning and you responded by blocking me. That's the present and you are the one living in the past because you still seek to do those things from the past which is blocking me. It's funny and I don't care that you aren't thinking straight.

I'm about moving on and being your friend because it's fun to chase after those types like you who are stuck in the past. I am a positive person. I don't care personally what you did. I have a great personality in that area, and it's my side that outshines yours.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, especially if they say it's positive and mine is to the max! Facebook is about personal empowerment and not shutting down others in your life no matter how annoying they are to you.

They are or were your acquaintances in your past life, so it shouldn't even matter with feeling inferior to them and showing that by being so negative.

I don't care that I have a better quality in being persistent and being moderate with the times and adjusting from the past. I just don't care what you did or what you supported. Who really cares except for you the most?

Some people like to be in the flesh by making complaints about other people directly at them or behind their back and then block them on Facebook. It isn't a good thing to be that way to anyone period. If it's too overwhelming, then maybe it's a good road to seek after a professional counselor who can help you find total empowerment with your life and coping with your frustration and unwillingness to allow changes that would restore relationships with others who hurt or annoyed you and influence them to be positive individuals.

Especially when it's just Facebook and not some guy who drug dealed and killed your sister or pulled a gun and robbed your favorite store, you are practically showing an inferiority complex by expressing frustration and annoyance and wanting to push it aside. In other words, stability is something that is treasured by people in general because it gives them happiness that can last through the hard times. Stability isn't expressing words of frustration and making fun of others and then blocking them on Facebook!"

Weird Promise

I was kicked out of a church, which believes in Jesus. Okay, I invite the laughing out loud (LOL) part with everybody reading this. They believe in Jesus supposedly and I do, too. I made a weird promise with them.

I know what the situation was, but I'm not going over it. The promise I made with them is that I'm going to show up with an attempt of trying to visit them when I make a million dollars and have a six pack. I am working hard for those goals right now, and it's something that I truly desire for myself. I guess it could be a fun way of sticking it to them, but because the church is so old and run-down, when I do have those things in like another 50 years or so, the church might not be even around in existence. Maybe, Jesus will come back by then. Who knows?

Conclusions

This is amazing because while I was dreaming, I was really conscious about trying to solve something people-related. I now can relate with how the Bible advises me to go about it. The Bible says to do something like reveal their personal problems with me and try to help with patching things up.

Out of love, we aren't supposed to care about the petty things people have done to us. We are supposed to be above it. This is a characteristic that we should strive to have. For myself, it just seems to come more naturally than others. It's hard for people sometimes to carry a thick skin and on occasions, people can show an inferiority complex from not being able to handle themselves properly. They can start shouting or express fear.

Overall, I never did anything wrong. I was just trying to live out the good things the Bible teaches with trying to relate to others. God always came first so maybe it's my calling to patch up my rough spots with people just from having unique, personal experiences from it. I really need to advise though that if they can't really let it go and show it with a simple task of adding someone as a Facebook friend because they are overwhelmed by trust issues or frustrations, then they should go see a professionally trained counselor to talk it over with their emotional issues and develop better coping strategies. Facebook has personal empowerment meaning you can control what goes on it. It's your page, express yourself however you want. I don't really care what people want to put on there, so I am not really going to over react. Even if I feel it, I am strongly aware of it and make an effort to not let it get to me. This is one of my best qualities and some people just don't have it at all and so, I have been trying to deal with those types.

Putting Things Behind Me

I think it's really all about placing God first in my life and trying to minimize distractions and being willful about taking the right path. There's really nothing wrong about living up to your full potential and to get there, it's still going to take quite a bit of work.

I used to have something of the nature of not being able to study because I was so caught up on wanting to have fun. I guess playing video games would after awhile get boring or just too hard to sit through and try to figure out. It was basically an addiction that I had, and it followed me all the way even past my college years. Just recently, I'm able to not have my mind constantly on it.

Nowadays, I'm reading! Reading used to be something I hated doing. It's a necessity. If you can't do it, then how can you review the Bible on your own time with no one there to read it to you? It's so much more economical to scrutinize through text instead of listening to someone repeat themselves over again. In a way, it becomes a personal advantage to be able to read other people's works. You just might take something from it that others would normally leave out and not concern themselves so much over. Take for instance, an exciting comic book. I still remember Robin getting killed by the Joker and another where someone used a vulgar word before blowing up an alien! Yeah, books with illustrations are so cool and never get old even with adult-themed anime and comic books!

Stuff I Missed

This is just a personal post where I will talk about the stuff I missed. I think my last couple posts were actually pretty funny or cool or whatever that actually some people come on to visit this site. I'm becoming a lot more comfortable with my own shell, and it just keeps on getting better.

The mindset is so important, and I really have to test this idea that I really put all in my heart and soul into loving God then I will learn some things through the ups and downs of life. I expect to be hit very hard, and it did happen in a way. I get bothered massively by people when they go through some type of conflict with me. It's probably my worst and everything else is like something happens and I get the normal scared, sad, or happy reaction and then it fizzles away. What if I became stranded on a deserted island with nobody to talk to? As long as I had my game boy and it never ran out of battery. No, I'm just kidding. Putting very little serious thought into it, I wouldn't care as long as I had shelter, food and water, stuff to keep me occupied, a Bible so I should carry around a pocket Bible while traveling to places, and maybe some tools so I could try reaching out to civilization or build a raft boat. If I could just make myself comfortable in that deserted island then what's there to not do?

Okay, so I rambled about something dealing with not talking to people. I'm trying to get a beautiful Christian wife now who will stay with me and give me constantly what I want hahaha, so I need to talk to people at least. These are activities of  my list that I have neglected so far:

1. Reorganize
2. Car wash
3. Growth stretches
4. Climbing gym
5. Programming
6. Bowling
7. Golf
8. Cooking
9. Avoid surfing web

These are the things I have done:

1. Bible (Amen!) hahaha
2. Schedule meetups with people
3. Drink diet shake
4. Work out
5. Trade
6. Hair care
7. Avoid playing Magic and Poker at personal time

It doesn't seem so bad. I'm prioritizing in a way with the ones that I deem more important. I am going to see how it's like to do every activity on my list even if it wears me out and I end up hating myself. 

Staying Updated With Goals

I guess it's about not being stumped by others and socializing with some bad people who lost it with me. I might as well just get random without shouting and let my mind run off because that's just how I get things done sometimes. I get this thrill off of trying to stay positive with them and patching up the rough spots the relationship got into.

As a result for future relationships, I'm made into a stronger and more keen person with handling myself around others. I'm also really numb about socializing with people, even though I'm open to it. I think that's why I don't really connect with the majority of people. A few friends willing to go all the way with me or being there for somebody is good enough!

I will accept what fate has in store for me and continue to trust in the Lord's way by trying to engage in studying the Scriptures accurately. Even though it's difficult and more challenging than I could have ever imagined, the thing that keeps me going is that digging deep into the Word of God is very rewarding and in a way prophetic, because the Lord's promises and blessings become revealed in that fashion.

Retiring From Poker

It looks like my days of trying to make a living with playing online poker has come to a close. I ended up working my way to the $50 balance that I needed for withdrawing all of it. One of the main reasons for stopping is because it is time-consuming and too unpredictable for me. I guess I'll keep around the skills I've obtained from playing the game and then use it every once in awhile playing recreationally.

 I only played poker with actual money for like ten years on and off, so I did have a decent run with it. Winning felt great in the beginning, but then after it just started wearing out. Losing really sucks, but at least now, I can be understanding about those circumstances. It used to take me a long time to recover from it while I was feeling frustrated or mulling negatively about it.

In a way, it's a form of entertainment among other friends and with the stakes not being so high. I'm sure there are some people out there who don't even wager a penny because they don't want to perceive themselves as gambling.

Developing Confidence Under Conflict With People

This one is something that has been a big load to deal with for me. It's like that few people I had a fine relationship with go into fight mode with me because they develop an inferiority complex issue. The first thing to accept is that those people have an inferiority complex! Next thing to do is to just not care whatever they do and let them know that. Just laugh away with the text messages you send them and tell them to have a nice life after telling them to not try make an assassination plot against you.

They will be like "What?" and "why do you keep talking about this?" It's just to throw them off, while having fun. Act this way with mainly guys and don't talk like that with girls. The girls are like a totally different planet you are on and the approach is entirely different.

For the girls, especially if you are a male, you have to treat them with the best manners you can give them. Using your common sense here, don't call her names that you think she's worthy of hearing. Don't justify what you did as wrong or show any hint of it. Be like, there's absolutely nothing wrong that happened unless you cheated on her then you are screwed! Besides doing something crazy like being a thief or killing her friend from dealing drugs, nothing so serious and she literally has an inferiority complex with you, just be like there's nothing wrong with yourself.

To show that there is nothing wrong with you with the girl, you have to lead her while talking to her using values. It's sort of like ethics, but the purpose is just to lead her in the right direction. You can state something like sometimes people go through struggles in life. To be a winner out of the struggle, it's an awesome thing to talk it through with the person you hate right now! Sometimes when a girl does something based on wanting to not talk about it, it sometimes becomes interesting for everyone to find out and by talking about it, she can hide all the bad stuff about herself that she knows and bring out all the good in herself and make the world a better place!

This is just from experience of how to deal with people who have an inferiority complex. I know they have it because I'm a man with a height of only 5' 3". I don't really think so much about how short I am now and keep forgetting to exercise in trying to make myself grow taller.

Meeting Girls Strategy

This is a fun post that I'm going to be really honest about for the single guys who are willing to go out of their way to meet someone special. Also, the guy will have probably exhausted all his limited choices like I did in the past. I was attracted to this girl, but then I figured she wasn't going to be the right person for me anyway. I also had these weird feelings that swing back and forth from being attracted and then not really with a female friend of mine. I guess she's just a friend, but I don't think any guy should pursue a relationship with her for personal reasons that I won't tell. I wouldn't want her to find out from reading about herself!

The thing I'm doing is really simple. The first step is to sign up for an account at meetup.com. Put a 50-mile radius from your ZIP code and then start browsing through meetups that would interest you. Of course, if they have a Magic: the Gathering event with just one half-decent looking girl stating she's going, I'm not even going to care and schedule to go check it out with another buddy of mine!

Other than that, it's great to have a flexible mind with a plethora of interests! I really hate Disneyland so I stay away from it, even though I know a lot of pretty girls who could be by my type and me theirs would go there. Go for an event where you would be comfortable with the activity and start searching for good-looking women who state they are going. Just judge it based on the photo alone. If they are wearing sun glasses, forget about it and don't even count it. If the event costs some money, then forget about it unless it's like grabbing food, bowling, going to the movies, etc. Also at huge events like at a convention, don't expect to talk to the girl you have your eyes set on because she probably won't even show and you will notice so much stuff going on that she won't even be interesting anymore.

At the beginning, sign up for some meet-ups that require approvals from a moderator. Just put in something decent and let go of any inferiority complexes. Don't waste time looking at the profiles of pretty girls who joined and will likely never join an event. I just don't budge to sign up for those groups that need approvals now, unless there are some exceptions like the event host is a pretty girl! Also, don't show your group meet-ups for others to see and change that option. I joined like a 100 groups and don't want people feeling weird about my curiosity. It's true though that other members will be able to see the groups that you are a part of with them. It feels actually nice to be able to feel connected like that.

So basically, I just start numbering the pretty girls who state they will be showing up. A lot of times, I'm like generalizing with the words "Old" or "she's taken" based on the physical information I see. I was attracted to some photos and then when I saw her in person, she seemed a little old as well. It happens, but it made me interested in showing up to the meetings. Some interesting activities include sports, socializing with games, dining out, and joining groups that you can easily relate too. Most of the time, there will be fewer girls going than guys with really cool events, but sometimes, when I notice more pretty girls than guys with events like dancing fitness pro events or museum hopping, I really want to consider going or at least I try to go to those heavy intense work-out sessions so I can just hang out with the girls. Lastly, I do care about my health and enjoy looking at artwork on occasion so it's part of my interest and that's the main thing before searching for pretty girls to hang out with.

Follow Up to Last Post

I just had a little fun there, but yeah I came to know Christ at a young age. I had an inferiority complex back then, well, I just felt tormented because I felt a great need to be a really high moral person. When people say because I'm a Christian, why am I being a hypocrite, that really gets to me. Now I perceive it as them making a threat with me because if I am deserving of something bad, why are they revealing that to me anyway? It's because I'm not going to have that bad thing happen to me no matter how much they say it to me! It all comes down to the rudimentary assumption that they have an inferiority complex because they can't keep a sure-steady, social stature from being totally agitated.

The only reason why I gave my life to Christ at a campsite was because I felt so touched as a kid (for reals!) that Jesus could wipe away my silly mistakes (sins, but this is how my teacher explained it). I felt like a wreck because I got smacked around by my mommy for messing up some math problems. She would discipline me and smack my hand with a wooden stick for messing up and the number of mistakes I made. It hurt, but then again, my mom isn't that good at math as I thought she was.

I practiced on some math problems and got good at it later on. I excelled at it because I had a bigger love then hate relationship with it. I loved beating to the punch all my classmates with solving simple math problems in third grade. I was afraid deep down inside that I would never be perfect enough. The message for me was that if I put my trust in Christ, he would make me a completely new person. It was just like how it felt for me after messing up a math problem. I would get better and start whizzing through it flawlessly. I had this image and it was so attractive to me that I was hooked and so I said my prayer to accept Christ with another kid who I never saw after some ages passed by because of my inferiority complex. It heightened because another kid I grew up with and knowing as my best friend gave a fit about something because he had an inferiority complex too. So two guys going at it, one more aggressive than the other, guess who got out of it sooner? He did because I stayed quiet and held it all in. I never recovered from it, but since I realize that the conflict I have been part of are people with an inferiority complex, I feel so much better!

My Faith in Jesus

A few individuals have used the argument that I'm not moral enough because I'm a Christian. I now get it supposedly. These people were like making threats with me in that they were saying things that never were going to happen anyway, but just telling me them because they were trying to make me feel bad.

I get that some people don't really have a thick skin, so here's the best argument in the whole world. I'm only 5' 3". The people I have been dealing with for the most part are taller than me. What they are bothered by is a 5'3" Asian guy who sent them some texts that they can't really decipher too well. They can't trust me for telling them anything because they are so bothered by it. Well, it's because they have an inferiority complex- just look at my height. My words must matter to them even though they don't understand it because they let it get to them. It's really silly. Because my words are more important than what they are feeling, I deny everything bad that they think and confirm everything good that they think, as long as it doesn't have a negative attribute about me!

Basically, I just say something like that and if they want to push something even further, I get up and leave. They can save the embarrassment for now and know that they let themselves get carried away. Everyone who followed through with them did the same, but it doesn't matter totally because I have a great personality with making a strong effort to let go of any resentment with them over the past. This is why I am meant to have really close friends and still do to this day.

I don't care about the restraining orders and how a little out-of-it girl thought I was a psycho! I am also recovering from bi-polar which I don't even believe myself at times. I was just depressed because I heard voices in my head that I couldn't get rid of. After they went away, I was a little bit over-happy all the time and I think I make myself super happy still and go overboard with that happiness all by myself because Jesus rocks! I believe God led me to the right person at the right time to be healed of my mental sickness at the time. It didn't cure my penchant for making other people with inferiority complexes mad though. Now, it all makes sense that other people feeling for these taller people and asking me to stop is because they themselves have an inferiority complex too and can't sort it out too well in a holistic or logical fashion.

There are some really cool and chill people who enjoy laughing and having a good time. I'm suddenly just flared up to socialize with people who had their fair share of struggles with me. I can deal with all types, even the angry and anti-social ones while they annoy me now. I don't need to join in with their inferiority complex in thinking that they are less of a person because they need to resort to those types of action to get what they want.

Approaching Things Without Yelling

I think the only time I will be yelling is if I end up in a physical fight with someone who lands a punch on me. I will go down screaming in agony! Actually, I imagine myself getting on top of the person and yelling, "Why did you do that?" I might choke him a little just to scare him and then let off and go from nice to screaming in my tone of voice, until he gives me an answer or I get tired of holding him down. I will then help him back up reluctantly and apologize while playing like I'm a fool for doing it.

I have the best argument in the world for all conflicts that I never ended up using. I was too befuddled trying to figure out the other person's side. I don't think all of that matters now, and it starts with the person in your head, which is you!

In all confrontations or whatever mess I get myself into, I don't plan on raising my voice anymore. I don't care how mad I get, I'm going to let all of that out inside my heart and soul. I'm going to just keep on talking and let myself get bored. With the girls, I have try to talk consistently really nice even if they know I'm faking it! The only time I'm shouting is if I end up pinning a guy on the floor who wants to hurt me, while asking him why he's doing that. I don't even care if I know the reason with that guy trying to hurt me. I'll do the same thing. That's the only time I will be yelling during conflict, on top of yelling if I'm talking in a really loud environment.

Running Through Schedule

I now have a running list to remind myself of what I am doing. Currently, I'm trying to take my money out of online poker. They require that I have a minimum of $50. I didn't really put too much into it because I considered myself a low-ball and super cheap gambler. I'm only two dollars away now. I basically played a little poker at around $23 and doubled it from some guy who bluffed against me and I just luckily had a strong enough hand to call for all of my money in that hand.

I then tried playing a little bit of slots and that didn't work. I also tripled my money today, but it was only $3 that I put in. I didn't want to risk it all like I did last time. I'm not about to make myself get all cocky now because I know how stupid it is to be that way. I just want to take out my money, so that I can move on to do bigger and better stuff. It's always hard to achieve your goal in poker, so I don't want to live for that thrill ride and would rather go to Six Flags for it instead.

Starting Off Strong With Trades

These last couple days of the month I was down by 110 pips. Now I am up by 450 pips! I basically updated my swing trading strategy and it seems to be working so far. Also, I have been confirming that my trading entries have been a decently strong choice by looking up the news for each pair. I just need to look at the title and a few sentences of the summary on the search engine to get an idea if I'm on par with the experts. So far, all my trades have looked that way so I think I could be on to something in the next couple months. I will see if I can close out with a profitable month and make it repeatable for the next three, before I really start getting serious.

This system of mine is starting to look a little advanced and very comprehensive because I'm trying to combine with fundamental and technical analysis. I wouldn't have received these ideas if it wasn't for my reading up on how to trade successfully. Pretty much, the saying could be true in that you need to read in order to achieve.

Wow, this has been going on for awhile!

When I really have the time, I think of at least five years of blogging on here talking about repetitive things habitually should be good enough for me to try making websites that talk about other stuff. I thought I was going to be talking a lot about Magic: the Gathering because I do know enough about it to even create a book about it, so I'm really thinking if I should just to monetize it. I would have to go back into building decks again after having said that I'm retiring the other day!

It's a pretty crazy hobby of mine, but I will have to see if I'm good enough to get people to check me out. I totally doubt it, even with the hard work I put into it. However, if I put in the hard work for currency trading then yeah, that's seriously living the life! Maybe I could create a website about trading currency and talk about different strategies that I come across. It would be my own mess of complicated stuff that I won't even understand myself and then people just coming on there to read it would be actually healthy for me because I would have some form of practice with communicating effectively!

I like that better because I can visualize myself earning a great amount of money by doing that. On top of that, I guess I can create another website about fitness and proper nutrition. I could be covering delicious and healthy recipes that I've tried myself! I could even endorse products that have worked for me and make a website off of it. Just the traffic that I generate online would be good enough to try to take advantage of for earning lots of money!

Retiring From Magic: the Gathering

I played my heart out with Magic: the Gathering for these past years. It looks like the wearing out portion is starting to take its toll on me. I believe very strongly that I have two of the best decks ever created, and I've been proving that to myself countlessly while trying out different styles and putting those decks to the test. Of course, my best decks lose, but all decks in Magic: the Gathering lose! Losing is a part of the game, and my best friend treats it like an accomplishment whenever he beats me in this game now. He's been at it for only a few months and has progressed pretty well, even though I don't think his decks are really that good. To me, they are just slightly average and part of meta (fancy word for how others like to play). He is trying to put all his heart and soul into it and acting like a little kid when it comes to boasting about how good his deck is! Oh well, it's just whatever.

I've tried all sorts of combinations and all colors. I'm just ready to retire from deck building now and move on with trading currency for earning a fortune. I'm not kidding about my trading, this is how it looks right now. It's boring for the uninterested mind, and that's how it's meant to be for the majority! I will take the opportunity people give me to game this system and earn some cold, hard profits.

Reorganizing

Well, I'm not really ready to get a long-term and cute girlfriend to eventually settle down with. I have my mind set on being successful financially and with a killer body to really worry about a pretty, needy woman's life and love issues. Maybe, someday it will come to me but now, it's not something I want to stress about. Even though I'm getting older, I'm just starting to accept being a single man. Well, a happy thing for me is that my ultimate type of girl happens to like most of my Facebook comments. She's engaged though to a really lucky guy who doesn't know how blessed he is. I'm cool with how our relationship is, and it's nice! Oh yeah, I haven't thought about the whole having children after marriage part, so I'm just not sure about that. Maybe, if only love turned out to be so much fun, then the possibilities would be so awesome!

Honestly, it's easier for me to slip up over the little things because nobody is watching me and I don't really have any accountability with a life partner. Maybe, marriage would help stabilize me more in that area. For the time being, I'm having fun being single and I think I can party even harder than any group of girls can. I'm just saying this because I think guys have an advantage with being single if they are smart and flexible about it.

I ended up reorganizing my table with all these envelopes that I left on there for a few months. In a busy society, it's actually lagging behind pretty greatly. Yet, I managed to complete everything needed in about an hour's worth of time. I guess I don't get that much mail, so there's no worries except that I have to worry about those deadlines or I could shoot down my credit score.

I just need to be a person with better time management and to also have a thick skin with problematic individuals. Even my own best bud can annoy me at times and I have to put up with his immature and arrogant comments. Yeah, I guess it's just whatever after all.

Kicking Off A Brand New Year

Well, it's been a lot of time wasted for me. I could have done a lot more healthier things, besides just stuffing myself and letting myself get heavier. Anyway, this is the text I wrote to this girl who has always been yelling at me in agony, "Why do you call me?" every time I've spoken with her. I've had no response to that of late because it just has left me so stumped. It's like the best option is to give her what she wants, which is to leave her alone.

I haven't been trying to act like a force of nature for the recent past years. As a result, I've had a lot more friendlier acquaintances. Friends do laugh when I talk about my past moments of yelling at people. When I even yelled at some girls because they were ticking me off, they just started laughing and ignoring the stuff I said. Well, this is what I texted her:

"People sometimes need to look beyond their flesh and bone and try to think like God. Your feelings matter but some people were made to be better than you so giving them a chance to help you is a very good thing."

It seems pretty sincere because I'm actually trying to use the best manners I can give her. It's mediocre at best, but I'm really trying to lead her in the proper direction even if it doesn't involve me being a part of her life. It's just natural for people to care about each other and some more than others. Talking it out can be a great way of relieving stressful problems and nice practice for concealing the bad things and bringing out the best in you! Even the least brightest person can sometimes pick up that some situation isn't going so well and so they have to be a bigger person than the situation would normally call them for.

In other words, I'm going off in some realistic and creatively altruistic direction while setting a positive and righteous tone. This is my new way of leading any girl who has a conflict with me. Being delicate in my speech is something I haven't done in the longest time, but I'm going to need it for my other, sensitive half someday.