I think my posts used to scare some people or made some people angered for no real reason that they would not want to bother to explain in a through manner. It's not that I wanted to offend some people. This formation of a psuedo-mob seems to be historically verifiable. I have been making some money because I have repeated surfers on my blog. To give the judge a chance to reflect his decision, if the judge has enough time here is the URL for my blog, http://www.academyofscud.blogspot.com! The questions that I ask may be so annoying to them because they don't know how to answer and still believe that I am not deserving of what it is that they can't really reveal to me. There is nothing wrong with asking relevant questions of my accusation because I thought I was going to be informed. I believe there is a right to be informed and is in their best interests to express their right of the First Amendment. The plaintiff and the ones who are responsible for letting this happen with me would probably like to think that it's mean but I should just keep writing because if someone is brave enough to read my writing they will probably let it influence themselves. This writing is probably so uncomfortable that some people need to disassociate themselves and act a little different around me then they normally would. I am not trying to suck up to anybody here. I'm just trying to make sense of this adrenaline flow I've finally understood and adjusting to it for the best results. I just need to be committed and that should work. I did a lot of "He says" deal outside of court. Anything dealing with legal matters, I let it be a lot of "She says" which implies my only female lawyer's confusion and frustration about this event. I would like to testify that relieving this situation will be better for a woman's image in general. My female lawyer was very defensive of me and really used legal arguments that I believe were not really prepared. I don't think I look bad at all with anything I do, but seems to bring so much indirect pain with unresolved feelings that do not really relate to me. I did not threaten, insult the girls, or abuse them. I simply stated what looked to be a reasonable thing to say. I have stated some things that were negative and provoking laughter but only to relieve myself of any frustration and doing it at a low level. I do not believe in using curse words or highly insulting words to hurt someone's feelings. I would rather use the truth in a full manner and wish them the best in dealing with it. They are supposed to be God fearing people, so I did not mean to imply that God was already working to punish them by pruning the membership and currently stunted with no multiple services on a Sunday. They basically stymied and made things go to their favor. It was difficult to try to understand them because things did not click because they naturally do not represent the feelings of just one individual. I tried my best to listen and be considerate and cooperate, and it looked it was more about impressing them instead of really listening to them. If they were supposed to be helpful, they would have given me a call about what to expect, as they all were already prepared what to state and I was not informed what was going to happen. The lead clergy man of a church had mentioned that I would expect a call from them to inform me of what the structure was going to be, but it had not happened. To their minds, I deserve a restraining order, to be cut off, and to be put in jail. They had repeatedly stated that by visiting them practically would land me in jail because that's what they said would happen. They will say that they did, but they add all of those events after as to try to cover it up. They will mention that they did not have to call me and that I still should have understood them. As a result, I am filing a side order which is to exercise my right to be informed. However, the police man did not send me to jail and did not really take a favorable side with me at the same time because he was in a bad mood for some reason. He showed it by stating that I was really ticking him off. If I must follow Jarred, Chris, Chai, Annie, and Betty then they would send me to jail even though I did not go to jail for doing something that they told me not to do multiple times and repeatedly in a sensible manner. Even though I do not understand everything and seems like they were exaggerating, I pretty much submitted to them already by honoring the gist of what needed to be done in their minds. It makes sense now with my model of how they are just trying to avoid having to feel guilt in an indirect manner. This may be apparent by them mentioning that they do not want to talk about it. They may try to naturally offset anything I say because it's in their nature to basically disagree with anything even if it's already sensible. I see a relation with all in them, in that there is no Facebook connection as it was once there. However, another person who people consider to be a leader at that church is Golf. He was involved in some type of exaggeration and was a witness and pretty active person, just that he sort of knew that the situation was not worth getting too carried over. Golf practically still has a connection with me on Facebook. If I did okay with one person with obviously someone who overreacted in this group with like views where they forced upon charge with me, then I believe that I have a shot of a domino effect which would be beneficial for everyone. I guess I cannot really handle a restraining order that does not seem like I deserve it. It's okay to talk about it because being blunt and revealing motives before letting something bad happen is good.
I think that I have a lot of good people in my life. Sometimes, it can feel like for me that is too hard to reflect on what life is all about because I guess I can be a little deep down nervous inside and then feel like some of those people were starting to harass me, it's a really hard thing to stay calm inside for only a certain period. After that, it's understanding and resolving the situation which is considerably a normal human interaction. They did think I would need to get some professional help; I am not pretty sure if they said this because they felt like providing me with bad advice. I was told by someone who was a key factor that she did not have anything against me, but that she was sent outside by her leaders but she did not get really forced into talking to me that day. I recall her smiling quite a bit. She also had a smile, pretty cute concern, and seemed less than resilient about me approaching her, so I think she would have advocated a restraining order for a different purpose. It was because one of her ambitions with me may have not been met.
