I pretty much have a life to live now, and it really comes down to connections. I'm not really spilling everything that I know on this site because I'm practically guarding some secrets for pretty much benefiting myself. Anyhow, the best I could go with it is that I'm just writing whatever I feel like right now.
It turns out now that even though I might be let down from being direct with others, as long as I made the attempt to try and give it my all, that's all the best it comes down to. I pretty much need to work on getting myself settled on some strong belief system, before I go after something. It sort of makes sense because when I'm in a state of believing something whether it's right or wrong, I make a huge leap with going after something.
Basically, what's on my mind is how my little sister who is three years younger than me is actually a little crazy. It really ticks me off because I'm the type of person who would get bored with her company but at the same time, I want her to be subservient with me. Okay, I can see how I'm actually very selfish deep down inside and it sort of makes me laugh now. Wow, with the people who tried to give me a hard time, I actually want them to be like kissing my feet and being nice to me or something. I don't want to be around them fully in general, but that's what I want with them. Also, I really would like them to always be in a good mood and to ride out the storms of life as a happy camper. Not everyone can really do this. I think I'm just a tad better than the average person at doing it; heck, I choose to not use swear words on a daily basis in my communication with others. I am tempted to use them when no one is around though or to even think about them, but I want to totally block them out of my system and to never use them at all. I just find swearing to be a waste of time, even though I can understand the artistic merit that some people try to emphasize the usage with it.
