I don't really have a lot of this discipline. What I do have is habits. I feel like doing something consistently when it turns into a habit. I can just continuously and aimlessly be stupid and go after things that don't make sense! I think I was trying to stand up for what I believe in which is really my motive and doing the best I can to conceal my anger.
It didn't work out well because I was trying to be nice. Well, from showing my true colors which I think was mean, I ended up being the best of friends with some people. That just goes to show that stressing out over feeling like how I'm so mean isn't really going to make that relationship last. I think it just comes down to laying out an emotional foundation and building upon it using trust, generosity, friendliness, and acceptance.
I was confided in really well by those people who were a bunch of jerks with me initially. I ended up being nice friends with them. I think I was just trying to hold back because I'm just thinking that what I'm doing is a sin. It's more like, I'm trying to go for the higher ground which is being a cool person and knowledgeable as well in dealing with situations.
I'm not going to fruitlessly watch T.V. and play video games, neither am I going to play Magic: the Gathering for awhile and just go searching for dates I guess or just go reading up on stuff that I would like to get better at.
Academy of Scrappy Credible Undergraduate Desire
