From having lacked a lot of confidence, I couldn't work my personal magic on a group of imbeciles [that old caregroup] to get what I wanted from them. I was just using them in the first place and was never aware of it. I was so selfish about it and kept on denying it to myself while arguing with them [that old caregroup] that I was a holy and cool person!
I never needed them [that old caregroup and Crazy Lee] in the first place and they were being stupid to begin with, so this whole situation was already a lost cause after taking away its humble beginnings. It's like going through a massive breakup and it left me feeling angry for years and bent towards getting back at them while continuously firing harmless insults that annoyed them to the point of going crazy that they decided to cut me off.
I actually know how to deal with all of this in my own quirky way, while having the brain cells for it already. I am a 4.0 student all the way from elementary to grad school, even though I was a lazy and weird kid who situated himself into being a lost cause so I was also being dumb.
There's no need for me to get upset by all of this anymore. It's time to make a personal change and become better using the best way possible. The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not be in want- Psalm 23:1.
I basically know how to fight back and go back to using them for my personal purposes of whatever, even if it's for revenge. Yet, I want to be on the Lord's side and am very driven and inspired while humbled constantly at the same time from believing what Jesus did for me at the cross! It speaks unspeakable joy to me.
I'm going to have to maintain a spiritual balance and walk in the light of God's Word in acceptance. An honest answer given is like a kiss on the lips- Proverbs 24:26.
