Just Typing Random

I pretty much signed on to do a job that pays some base but will also give you some commission if a customer decides to buy it. It's cool to have a base and to not worry about receiving a simple paycheck. I think I made a very bad decision to place myself a little in debt and it left me feeling a little displaced. On top of that, dealing with a few restraining orders also killed my mood for a little bit. I have pretty much vented with some people who sort of were responsible for those restraining orders and I feel like I'm sort of ready to move on as a result.

It was really hard to deal with it in the beginning. I'm just really tired right now and writing about something and just not feeling very productive about.

One more post

Because my parents moved and they pretty much disconnected the internet at the old abandoned house which is still okay for occupying and bunking in, it got pretty boring there. I have like 5 labtops stationed somewhere in the house. I'm a super computer geek man. 5 labtops, I feel like I'm on top of the world. No, that's just an exaggeration. No, I don't feel like that. I'm just kidding around here. The lack of internet is the reason why I can't write on the blog and I've been pretty busy this past week. So things are moving along for me and it looks like maybe I'll get the internet at my parent's new house, if I ever decide to head over there. I have not even spent an ounce of resting in my own bedroom, pretty funny...okay maybe I laid on it and noticed that someone laid on it during open house but that's about it. I can get the internet at the library. Yeah, that sounds good. One time, I think I saw this girl at the library who looked like the girl who placed a restraining order on me. There was this huge similarity! I was pretty shocked and dropped my jaw and stared at her for awhile and she stared back feeling a little reproached and she froze wondering and then as I left it looked like she would not mind sitting next to me... she had left her cell phone and maybe I could have picked it up and brought it her and then started a conversation with her. Oh well, I think I was not really being that big of a ladies man that time.

Taking A Friend Out Who Tried To Beat Me Up?

The answer is no way! He's still a friend but no way! I don't want to stir up violence with this guy. Haha. I don't want to bust it out and then start doing some chop liver action. Sorry, I don't do that. Hey homie don't play that and I do not fight my own friend for whatever reason. It's quite interesting because some people find my friend a little funny but if you have some mental problems and with lots of personal preferences then maybe there might be some collision with this guy. I sort of need to start taking the safer roads now. By admitting to my faults truthfully and letting out all that is hindering me through writing which is like one of the hardest things for me to do for myself out of fear of being exposed, I am growing as an individual. I think that's why people keep a personal journal for themselves sometimes. I'm doing something that's a little weird. I'm writing on this stupid blog that people can look at and read at anytime and for any purpose. I'm basically sharing about myself because I'm trying to expect a quiet response.

I think there are some trigger words here that will get me blacklisted or something like that obviously. So as a I write about the truth and to let myself be a laughing stock by writing about myself and being truthful in releasing all my steam on this blog, I'm finding that it's a pretty good supplement to what I'm trying to accomplish with my sister, a pastor of a small church, a vegetarian dude, another dude, a girl, and another girl who I called up to ask if I could clear out her dust mites on her mattress. I talk in a pretty mellow voice when I'm admitting that I'm mad sometimes too. It's like I'm contradicting my actions that I say are pretty bad into being alright while I'm speaking honestly which gets others to sort of let go of whatever paranoia and anger they had with me. I think those are the feelings that they had with me and I was sort of evoking those feelings in an indigenous manner because I was trying to be vicarious and assertive about the situation. Hey looks like they did sort of doddle the situation and I got a smile from a girl who put a restraining order on me.  

Found A Job To Combat My Debt!!!

Yeah, it looks pretty nice ... I'll be raking in about 1400 dollars a month for working only about 40 hours a month! It looks pretty good so far just that I want to position myself to get a computer job. Hmm, this is one of those sad feelings I sometimes get that I will share on this blog. I don't know why I want to cry underneath when I can't have something so badly and it has been bothering for decades. I am approaching my third decade now and I think it's about time to think that third time's a charm!

Debt is a debt and luckily, my debt does not climb in reference to spider man moving up a skyscraper to catch a bad guy. I know I'm just making stuff up internally in my head. It's all sentimental stuff... I think I should learn to adjust. I'm going to try to some interesting blog posts which no one is going to care about, but some people did because I think they just got a little paranoid about this whole issue. Paranoia in people that comes at you is such a bothersome thing. I get a lot of it for just being a short guy and sticking around somewhere. I need to just be honest about the situations now no matter how bad the outlook is for me.

How do you change a sister into a lady?

Hmm, I'm sort of sitting here and realizing something normal which is mature siblings getting along with one another. I guess it's not really a bad thing that my little sister actually texts me back and tells me to grow manners. Man, I must be a pretty messed up individual sometimes when I'm really mad about something. I really vent sometimes by blowing steam at the person's face. I really need to become better at controlling my own anger which stems from feeling inferior. Hey, I'm a pretty short person too so I read about this inferiority complex thing. It's really crazy that I have to deal with this thing with me. I guess I'm trying to get a little sneaky from feeling a little mad about being shorter than others. I have this interesting yoga book that claims to fill your discs on your spinal cord, so someone out there in the internet is reading this pretty Asian blog of how I'm going to try to make myself taller. I have been refuted by close friends that growing taller is not really possible because of D.N.A. I think those friends of mine are actually pretty good friends to me. I think I'm just leaning on trying to let go. Man, I hate feeling a little angry at being a little shorter... I'm not even thirty yet but I am pretty old... man, I wonder if when I'm 40 I'll still think I can grow taller. I gotta try something man. This is going to get a little weird.

Since this is my blog

Hey, I'm just pretty much writing anything right now. I'm in some horrible debt right now which really sucks. As long as I did not steal any bank and will be responsible in paying back what I owe, I hope to find relief again. I'm realizing that there are some really nice people out there especially those I had spent some time with.

I don't really know how my reputation is exceeding itself now just that everyone seems to be expecting a lot more from me.

What I'm Up To

I have read somewhere that online poker is sort of illegal because Congress has been trying to outlaw it. I guess that makes me sort of a bad person for playing it then and taking money from other people who just don't really know when to let go of their hands. I also get worked up too and lose my money but in the end I just broke even. Man, it's kind of a waste of time but I'm realizing that the PokerStars offers some benefits for playing and storing up some compensation points. You can trade in these points for money if you have enough and that's pretty cool for me. They also occasionally offer free money tournaments if you deposit at least $10. I guess if you are good enough then you'll make some money. Not everyone is good at poker and it looks like some people play just to lose their money and so Congress wants to protect the bad players from losing so much money I guess.

In the end, I don't plan on gambling millions of dollars with Poker. That would be too insane for me and losing with the strongest hand to the worst hand which is like the odds of a lottery but very possible would extremely be so painful so I'm not going to even go there in the first place. I don't care how much pride some players have and want to shove it on me. I just don't care about trying to follow in those crazy players' footsteps now. I project that I could earn a six figure income by just breaking even on this PokerStars site. It's pretty crazy that I can run up the math like that in my head. To get there, it's going to take a lifetime maybe to master it but it would be a fun retirement then and like doing nothing. I don't even know if poker sites are going to be around by then. Maybe Congress will succeed in passing a law to outlaw it then I would have to find something else for a stupid hobby where I waste some retirement funds and transfer a little money over to decent people who were also great players. 

I'm currently thinking about driving a dumb truck to pay off some loans that I incurred. I tried some money-making schemes and it just did not work out for me. I still have faith in some of those items because I never even placed my money in them but just acquired some online books to read about the trades. I would not mind starting an Ebay business and then letting it go on auto-pilot. I also would not mind investing a little on the Forex market. By working for money, I will have then time to go for additional schooling and invest on other stuff to make more profit. It seems like an okay life for me. I think the hard work will pay off with me helping the world and the joy and satisfaction that comes out of that. I don't really feel so empty about doing that. I'll of course be having tons of fun by going places and I hope I get wealthy while I'm young enough. I just don't want to get so old and senile with money pouring in every second- that would sort of suck honestly for me. I'm thinking about benefiting hungry children and Christian ministries that really want to help others with supplies or medical support.  I may even pay my way to an education to be on the front line there. I have to be honest and state that I took some interest in learning about what people like and how I could be a pretty good person for others to get along with, even though there may be lots of differences.  

I'm honestly not all that great because I yell at people sometimes for irritating me a lot. It takes me awhile but when I get there, I think it's not good for the person who got me there by acting irrational and being so persistent about it. Only on certain instances, I'm going to let the person go with me yelling at them so much because I understand their hard times- like if I had a pregnant wife =D. I might actually enjoy her bantering and taking care of the baby still while she's recovering.

Despite Freedom

Even though I have a lot of freedom than I had before, I don't really want to be so lazy in my life right now. I don't really want to screw up situations for myself anymore. I just need to compensate to the best of my ability right now and maybe working on myself is going to be life-long process for me. I don't know if my mind is going to be capable of being that person who would handle a marriage satisfactorily. I mean I do like someone a lot but I feel like I'm really incapable sometimes based upon my upbringing. It's pretty crazy that I can sometimes be so hard on myself. With all of these personal feelings sort of dissipating, I have so much more distractions coming in and that I have to be able manage some new ones that are a part of me and have been so persistent.

Issue with some people

I guess I'm just really angry right now about a lot of stuff that's so little in my life. Even though I have this anger, I am still capable of looking for a job and be stronger at getting along with other people. I'm sort of like placing my pride over those few people who can be like a jerk with me. My little sister is about three years younger than me and for awhile we have been arguing over something that I can't really pinpoint anymore. It's been driving me really nuts because whenever she yells, it just makes me go bonkers and want to throw a huge fit at her without really trying to insult her. I guess I'm a lot better at still listening to people's words while I'm at this state of mind and while I'm yelling, I know that I'm really mad and want to vent. I have all this going on in my head and I just want to let it out. I'm currently working on being able to turn off my anger with other people. I'm just directing towards the source that's making me really angry. I need to be able to just center my anger properly on the source that's bugging me and be able to put it aside naturally. I think I'm just going to be pretty mad towards my sister by making fun of her a lot now.

There's also other people at a church called Hope Church in Los Angeles, CA who really bothered me too. They really wanted to help me grow in some area that I was not really interested in learning about or even submitting. I was pretty scared at the time so I tried to be reasonable to the best of my ability. My mistake could have been to exert a little overconfidence in the situation that made me think that they were not really intending on arresting me or taking me to jail. Since the police literally did come over, I'm really mad at them for calling the police on me. I was there when the guy with glasses and a vegetarian said "Let's call the cops" in a whisper. He then texted someone and waited for the cops. I was standing right next to them and managed to say something that made them cry out of sheer luck or anger. The cops then detained me and started like going "Oh, you are so in trouble." I think the people just wanted me to go home, but the cops kept me there so I think it's reasonable to think that the vegetarian guy could still get frustrated if I bring up the incident. I don't know if the vegetarian guy is going to stay a vegetarian anymore, but at the time I knew him he was self-proclaimed vegan. I am very furious about the incident and want to really yell at all of them for what they did to me. I really respect the majority of the people at that Hope Church, but it's a few of the influential people there that I got into a major argument without even trying to get there. They pretty much initiated a fight with me and tried to cover it up by making it look peaceful.  They can't even answer my questions in a manner that would be pleasing for me, which is being informative and reasonable. They basically said that they were not negotiating anything with me. One of these days, I feel like I'm going to show and put my mark on them because I'm so angry about it and need to let it go. One of the girls there even put a restraining order on me which is sort of making me laugh because I really didn't do anything to her. I thought we had nothing against each other the whole time. I guess we do, and I did state that I love her as a friend so I can't really yell at the person who placed a restraining order on me; no matter how mean she may have been with me. I just know how to submit in that area pretty well. I already have another restraining order which I think caused a frenzy when people found out about it. It was sort of a botched restraining order because the guy who placed a restraining order on me was a little inaccurate about my intentions. He did state that he does not understand me, which I heard from one of his closest friends.

Looks like writing about all the bad truths in my life is helping me not get so mad anymore. I guess writing is becoming a strong tool for me. I've been writing similar to this style without using any curse words or direct threats but maybe a lot of insults with the people who made me mad in my writing. No wonder if they have something against you, they are going to block you. My speeches have caused some of the girls to block me even my little sister, but what's funny is that I can still text my little sister. I know that a girl who had a problem with me blocked my calls but I stiill can call her up and she'll probably get so annoyed by it. I remember the vegan guy recently intercepting my calls and then I sent him this e-mail that pretty much bagged on him legitimately and then he stopped intercepting my calls. I remember the other guy who sort of capped out with me get a little worn out with me calling him up all the time and then agreeing to himself that he should not block me anymore. Looks like I made some progress. It's just with some of these girls that I'm going to really mad at and talking to them an angry manner. However, with the majority of the girls I want to be really nice with them and not try to make anything problematic. Just because I have a problem with one person does not mean that I will literally try to push a problem for other individuals.

Just Writing About It

I have been sort of acting like a loser with the people by continuously calling them up and messaging them. The messages could be really confrontational and annoying to the people who did something bad to me. They pretty much took me to court and it left me feeling some resentment with them. I really feel like overall after everyone has told me that they are sort of losers about this whole situation. Even the police man who got involved with the situation is sort of a loser to me also. My friend has told me that a restraining order is nothing compared to really struggling in life. A restraining order is not affecting me from pursuing after other jobs and hopefully, I will have a job to work on sooner or later.

I recall reading a story over the internet about how a drunkard with several restraining orders from women passed the background check and was hired into the faculty of a high school. I'm currently on the horizon of fighting against my restraining order because I feel that I was inconceivably abused by the petitioner and a church pastor! It's crazy that a church pastor would write to you and state that he wants to call the police on you and then cover it up by saying that Jesus loves you. Trying to evangelize and maintain a church with how the pastor did is not very successful on the long run and I think he really lost out in the end. I have called them up several times over the past couple months and they have pretty much blocked my calls and messages but I still manage to get around it and call them up still. I think they are really waiting for me to comment really violently or in a threatening manner but I'm a little too smart for them to do anything like that. My anger is something I can reasonably control and still function pretty smart in society. I just can't withstand it after awhile and need to release my tension with these abusive people by letting go of my inhibitions. It's basically just yelling at them, feeling all my sensitive boundaries and then trying to move on without them. I guess I really need to shout at them for awhile now.

Job Trouble

I thought I had secured a job over the last month, but am on the hunt for another job again. I have managed to obtain a license to drive a forklift. I hear that the wages are not really that bad with driving a forklift around a warehouse, and I do really like driving around cool vehicles like that. Maybe I have a little slow turtle speed in me which would feel the adrenaline rush when lifting those cranes to pick up really heavy objects that package handlers cannot really handle.

Overall, I'm doing okay. I really need to finish up repairing a friend's computer. It's been so hard to get back to it; in addition to my parents having moved and me not trying to rely on them so much for my financial needs now. I'm clearly in debt right now and am doing the best I can to find this job. I am glad that my mom paid me a hundred dollars just to do a simple choir around the backyard! That was very generous of her and it helped me get that forklift license which has some fees associated to it in getting a certificate. I am pretty much going to write a little more.

Writing Truthfully

I think if you want to write about anything and if that requires you to manage your anger at the same time, then I think you should really deal with the person whose trying to cause you some anxiety. It takes a lot of time and personal reflections to understand how you could be fair about the situation. Regardless of how others may think I'm a selfish brat about something, I guess I really still try to be nice about it and do something about it. I don't really care what they think about me because on the long run they are really damaging their judgment center and becoming more obvious to me of what their flaws were all about.

Because of my personality that cares about people and wanting to be a pretty easy going guy despite some people acting like jerks with me, I still want to try to be good about everything and be a loving individual because I think being a pretty good guy or loving others in the name of Jesus is always doing the right thing. I think I'll be saying a lot of stuff that could be trashing others over the internet. As long as I remain truthful about it to the best of my ability, I am protected by the First Amendment. To show some respect, I will invent names so that only the closest parties know who I am referring to but the outsiders will have to do a little more digging to understand my situation. I prefer that outsiders sort of stay away with my conflict as I am going to be writing mainly to exert some puns and make myself laugh as I visit lay out some details. I'm not absolutely perfect in my grammar as I am only spending like five minutes doing this. So with five minutes of typing, I come up with more witty statements with trying to be nice over all my enemies...hmm, sounds okay so far.

Posting One More

I'm just typing something really random again. I'm trying to keep up with a personal quota of a post every day. So if I miss every day then I need to come up with 365 posts in one day before the year ends! My friend Snake has been spending the night and wants to let you guys know that he's been keeping me busy. Hahaha. It seems like we have a special relationship going don't we? I don't really think so like that. P.S. We are both into girls more than guys... I mean guys are cool to mess around with during football season, but girls are very fun for something else. Hahaha. I hope to remain pretty calm this season because the superbowl is coming around the corner very soon!

I'm going to wait another day

I guess with the personal disclaimer that I wrote and how this blog is setup, it's going to be very deterring for me to write the whole absolute truth about myself. The reason is because the personal disclaimer is coming next after I'm writing this post. The whole posting is actually down in a present sense of an order. I don't really want to change the order of the posting because I like the idea of having a more updated sense. Going backwards on this post seems to be convenient for me at the moment, but changing the order might be sort of weird for me. I guess some of the writings I make are actually better in the past then I put in the present. It must be that it's a rare thing for me to come across writing something that's very cherished. Most of the other times it could just be rags and writing whatever.

Personal Disclaimer

Everything that I'm about to write may offend some people. It may be so gross that no one will could really like me in person. The reason why I do this is because my desire is to be really truthful to myself and put it all in down in writing on a site that is just hardly known by people in this world at the moment. I do believe in a savior named Jesus. I also do believe in how he miraculously saved me from a life of being miserable and have been under His grace all this time.

The Bible states that the heart is wicked beyond all measure and cannot even compare to God's own righteousness. I do agree with that. I am about to state everything good and bad about myself. I want to be absolutely honest with myself. I want to try to be a pretty cool guy as well and be nice about every situation when there's conflict. I will be stern sometimes if I lose my temper momentarily but I won't let it control me to the point of creating guilt underneath me.

What I am about to say are personal secrets underneath me that I guarded for so long. I am pretty much not going to wipe my own slate clean but rely on the Holy Spirit to do that.

Typing 1 out of 3 Posts

I know that there is a right to type anything truthful about myself. I guess I have some type of flavor that makes it okay for everyone to get along with me. I also don't mind helping out as much as possible even if I'm busy sometimes. I really need to prioritize my life a whole lot better now.

I'm going to change my outlook a little more now. I'm going to basically write anything dealing with the truth even if it's bad on me. I will know that I am saying some negative things about myself and accept them. I will pretty much do this to see if I can overcome circumstances. I really made the decision to never commit suicide no matter how sour the situation gets for me. I might as well lay out the whole truth about myself and let God do the rest for me. I'm a little uncomfortable of saying some things about myself as that's how I grew up. Since this is writing and passive and the world can get in here any moment I decide to run for President or something like that, I'm pretty much projecting myself in a more dishonest or honest way. I will try the best I can to be outspoken in writing with myself. I guess it's the best thing I could do for myself in this blog.

This Blog Is Kinda Dumb

I'm not very successful right now and I do not really care at the moment. What I could sure use is a million dollars a year of profit that I could use for my expenses and to help others in need. I really need to come up with a game plan now. With what I lost in the past, I realize that I possess certain characteristics now that I did not have in the past.

I have this idea. What if I use my good characteristics that I've developed right now to help me succeed in the future. I sure hope that everything is going to go well for me here. I think I have many excuses right now and really need to think about going on the defense for myself just this time. I have the on and off button that's a part of me now. I think my on switch is not always that good for people who made some negative decisions with me. My off switch can happen any time and that's what I need to utilize appropriately now.

Jobless, People can rescue you!!!

Dah duh nuh dahhh.... (superman theme) so lame I know. I'm a little too short of time to place a link of the superman song. You know what, it's only going to take a minute. Here's the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELNh23yRiJc

That's a pretty okay video, not bad at all. Okay, the whole job situation is to just go out to look for one and stop being lazy. That's what parents are screaming and hollering at their grown up sons these days. It's interesting...

Ever think about driving a bus? Nope... ever think about becoming a pro gambler who goes broke in 1 hour? Nope... Ever think about doing the uhhh nasty? Well, I don't want to be paid for that I'd rather enjoy that in my spare time if you know what i mean... Okay I'm sounding so vaguely strange on this blog...

Just brainstorm and something should hit as you are trying to make ends meet. You'd be like wondering why am I wasting all this time with these weird home-based products that others advertise with a statement that they could make money... I'd rather try something more conventional. It's true that there are some stuff out there that could work for you.

Just Typing Away Before I exit

Hey, how's it going? I'm doing okay and how about you reader? Oh what's that, I seem to be getting telepathic read of you. What's that, you are finding out about yourself right now? Oh that's wonderful to hear that you are coming along and that things may be maintained on the long run.

I tried some Mr. Rogers technique. I remember watching some funny kung-fu movies where they pronounce names like Crouching Tiger or Screaming Lady attack. Haha. I guess I need to exit from this blog. Hmm, writing about how this blog is being more of a stand-up whatever (not comedy) is pretty interesting. I hope everybody finds something to keep them going today.

Man This Blog is Super boring

Man, I'm really wasting my time typing on here but I guess nothing is really bothering me anymore, which is really good. I sort of have my persuasive skills back and I can see now that they were pretty strong while I was irritated about a lot of stuff dealing with the people I came in contact with sometimes. I sort of see now that I'm pretty much over a lot of things that I used to have some problems over and that it's better for me now to really see the light of things.

My parents moved to a bigger place in a gated community. It's a really beautiful area and it seems like I'm going to be having to contribute a lot with them now. It's maybe because I'm the son and also that I'm seen upon as someone who needs to become a responsible adult. There are privileges to being a grown up and still young. However, it's really important to find information that suits you. I read this one book that proposes you ditch some people who are not helping you get what you want. I don't think it's everything in my heart that I want to do. I just need to accept things for myself that I know are good, meaningful, and are aligned with the Holy Spirit. I should just be spending some time in prayer to figure out how I could be a good contributor to this society and to not go crazy all of a sudden and then rip people's hearts out. There must be a saying of how we need to just deal.

Running out of ideas

I guess it's good to look around while you are asking questions and then research on some things. I was reading up on interesting stuff like playing poker. It's one of those legal jurisdictions on how it really hits the gray area. It is ideally called gambling and a lot of people call different things gambling. In a way, marriage is also gambling too because 50% of all marriages end up in divorce. It really sucks that this one person I was attracted to had parents who separated. That is a really appalling statistic. Even running a small business is considerably a gamble but it really comes down to the skill of the business man.

Some games have losing odds if you gamble on them like roulette. I've even heard about a family that exploited the flaws of a roulette table and then got kicked out of every casino. Some people have even thought about counting cards on a blackjack table, while using their powerful mind to calculate the winning hand at any given moment. It's pretty crazy that people can come up with these things when everything seems to be unbelievably unfair and against you. It does create estranged family members sometimes like Jennifer Harmon (a poker player) had with her dad but slowly some states are even recognizing card playing games like poker as a profession. Furthermore, Jen and her dad eventually reconciled after realizing the success that she has had winning millions and maintaining a lovely marriage. The law is also changing their minds about poker being a pure gambling game. It's due to the practicality of how some gifted card players can read when they have the losing hand while holding strong cards and can also trick others to laying down better hands. It's impressive how the history of this game and some controversy in it are still part of this world.

Before Midnight Post

Okay I'm just typing another sentence just for laughs. I guess this may get so annoying starting with a sentence that says that I'm creating a new post. I might as well just keep this up and see what I can get out of it. Maybe, I'll brainstorm an okay idea with my pretty good mind. I don't think I'm all that great in my head or anything like that. I need to really do things that are more sure instead of placing all my eggs on one basket and hoping that it will keep me from visiting the next waterfall.

Okay just typing

I'm just typing away on this random blog just because I just want to. I missed a day yesterday because I guess I did not have enough time to type something. It's like almost the next day for me so I am rushing today to type away. I would just like to keep a quota of righting on the average of 1 post a day so that would give me 365 posts in one year! Yeah, in addition to that let's add in 365 days of reading the Bible and also 365 days of doing different stuff.

I'm pretty much called a lazy person for some reason. I'm called a lot of bad things by one person. I was given bad support for some reason with this one group of individuals who might have considered themselves to be very noble people. I'm so okay and over it now that I don't think I need to bring it up again to laugh about now.

Struggling In Life With Dumb Obsessions

I really hate doing stupid stuff. I really need to just let some things go. I hate doing them because it's ultimately just going to make me feel like a wreck. I hate some things that I've done in the past and as a result, I am really hurting myself dwelling on them so much. I need to make a super huge effort in being patient with myself and never worrying so much about what life has to offer. This is just a human effort to reconnect with God and just let go of stuff that should not really be so important in life. I should not really have to worry about how others could talk behind your back over something that is not so really negative. I should not really have to worry about stuff that I want to make disappear. I really need to just start all over again and just make a consistent effort and lifelong commitments that are very beneficial for myself. This is not about pursuing after self-esteem. This is more about glorifying God through believing in Christ for me. I really have to step it up and let go of things and just be like willing to live through my own personal sufferings and be able to deal with them without trying to find a mode of vanity to escape my own personal reflections that I don't want to remember.

Working Out While Working 60+ Hours

Okay, this is something that I never imagined myself doing. That extra 30 minutes a day of intense physical work-out will develop into like a figurative hump of a camel. What I mean by this is that when I need the stored energy, it will be there. I won't have to feel all this burning sensation in my eyes when the time hits me through people causing you disfavors. Haha. I'm just having fun typing again. I need to really step it up now and find what I have always been looking for. I know that I am not big son of a gun that will destroy people's reputations and then make them go nowhere in life. Haha. I don't want to do those things. It would suck to bring someone down when you know they could help you when you are suffering in life. It's all being smart here when you are trying to be nice. It's just that sometimes I feel like I need to talk. Talking is what I do and I think that several females don't really mind hearing words generated through a guy's mouth if it's heard so often. Talking is just talk. As long as it does not incorporate any bad actions or words that seem really obscene to the point of making someone's head crack, I think you are fine.

Random Again

Alright, I have to be working very hard right now. I'm just talking about working hard now. I must be in good position to just write about boring stuff. Okay, with all this time that I have it means that I should stop messing around with stupid video games and watching boring movies. I should really be out there doing something in generating income. I think with all the hard work that I put into it, it would mean a lot of better things for myself. I could relax and go on vacation during the weekend and do some cool stuff. The only problem that I have for myself is that I really don't have any problems and that I should pretty much tolerate my life right now for at least a good year. I need to find a way to reconnect with my friends again and see how they've been and what they have been up to. I need to put good focus on things and not worry about stuff that much anymore. I guess I've been sensitive to this area and that I don't really have to worry so much about it anymore. The money means nothing to me. Driving around people for fun is great. Talking to people is fun. A lot of these things are good and meaningful. I don't need to worry about it that much and just be pretty careful about some things. I should just be very honest and outspoken with the intention of loving others. I want to really model my life after what Jesus did for me.

Hi

Hey there. Hello, I'm just typing away very randomly on this blog. Blah blah. I'm just being sarcastic now. I'm just typing whatever right now. I need to really keep myself occupied or else I'm going to grow up all lazy and not very healthy while being possibly overweight if I go on some binge or develop some obesity. I guess I'm really at peace with myself to be able to say stuff about my physical things and not really worry about it that much. It took me a very long time to sort of find peace with myself like that. Anyway, it does not really matter and I hope to never bring that topic up again even on this blog. I'm just doing stuff that I want to keep hidden underneath with myself. Why should everybody read this blog and find out stuff about myself or others? I think it would be better to be more informative about stuff that are happening and sort of pass on the torch. That would be a pretty cool blog then.

Keeping A Clear Mind

No matter how much some little things try to frustrate you in life, I think it's best to learn to let stuff go. When you put yourself in a situation of just trying to make an earning on your own and then accumulate some debt from school, I don't think you are at fault for doing it. We also all have some spending needs sometimes. It's just really important to not to go on a binge of some sort. It's great to help out the needy, to extend out our reach and time for them.

You know what, women may be different from a guy but it's not like I'm not naive enough to not be able to handle them as good friends. To not to really be in their way or try anything bad and if there needs to be something done with them, just talk in an encouraging or concerned manner without trying to bug them or annoy them. They may do this to you sometimes based on the relationship they want to take upon with you, but being a man with a big heart is what my mom seems to really enjoy being around.

Thanks To God For A New Year

The world revolves all around Jesus. Maybe, I'm not cut out to be the guy who does exactly what Jesus of the New Testament did. I'm really enlightened to know what Jesus did for me on the cross about 2010 years ago. What a way to start off the year, Sunday is considered to be the first day of the week to some people. It's a day of rest for many, to take a day off from work, to go on a picnic with friends and family, or to finish off a cool camping weekend, and so on. I'm so privileged in this world to know that I have a place on this blog. =D To be able to post every thought and to never worry about it being scorned upon by some people who think that it's cool to laugh about stuff that I don't even know about.

It's about putting our trust in the Lord for all our needs, to worship Him in times of triumph and also in times of mourning and in peril, to really center our devotion upon the one who started it all for us. It's good stuff, does it really matter for me to try to be a good guy? I think that it does in the incidents of little things that became too out of hand. This is so good for me because I get to really exercise permissibly from the help of the Holy Spirit healthy decisions to resolve something that seemed so out of hand and to really be more focused in this world with a bunch of hope that won't die.

Morning runs

I have stuff to do. I guess playing video games and watching television all the time for me sort of translates to depression. No, I'm sort of joking but it does not really fulfill my aggressive needs of being out there, working hard, and being rewarded from some labor. What I'm going to try to do now is observe some discipline of not playing video games and watching television whenever I am by myself. I am getting really used to myself now that someone used to think I was a bipolar person or very depressed about stuff or needed some mental help. All of that stuff is really making me laugh now internally. To get a person to let you show up on his or her facebook profile, you pretty much need to be really nice with them and in a pretty consistent basis. I don't feel that shy about it anymore or feeling so irritated that I would have to yell at the top of my lungs. They can feel that way and find out through others that I am not really like that.

Happy New Years

Not posting anything on the first day of the year would be like a cruel joke for me now. Last year, I managed to post something about half the amount of the year. It's really cool to be alive today and happy to be able to make any New Years resolutions. My main ones are pretty much to work out and be more focused in finding a more suitable job for myself. It's also to get involved more and to pretty much start reading the Bible everyday. I guess that's a good thing to do in reading the Bible. It only takes about 15 minutes a day to finish the whole year. I'm going to try this. It looks like a wonderful plan to do, which I will try so hard in accomplishing. That's it, without decreasing any fun for myself I should really focus on discipline and mastering my own busy schedule so that I am capable in enjoying good stuff.