Just Writing About It

I have been sort of acting like a loser with the people by continuously calling them up and messaging them. The messages could be really confrontational and annoying to the people who did something bad to me. They pretty much took me to court and it left me feeling some resentment with them. I really feel like overall after everyone has told me that they are sort of losers about this whole situation. Even the police man who got involved with the situation is sort of a loser to me also. My friend has told me that a restraining order is nothing compared to really struggling in life. A restraining order is not affecting me from pursuing after other jobs and hopefully, I will have a job to work on sooner or later.

I recall reading a story over the internet about how a drunkard with several restraining orders from women passed the background check and was hired into the faculty of a high school. I'm currently on the horizon of fighting against my restraining order because I feel that I was inconceivably abused by the petitioner and a church pastor! It's crazy that a church pastor would write to you and state that he wants to call the police on you and then cover it up by saying that Jesus loves you. Trying to evangelize and maintain a church with how the pastor did is not very successful on the long run and I think he really lost out in the end. I have called them up several times over the past couple months and they have pretty much blocked my calls and messages but I still manage to get around it and call them up still. I think they are really waiting for me to comment really violently or in a threatening manner but I'm a little too smart for them to do anything like that. My anger is something I can reasonably control and still function pretty smart in society. I just can't withstand it after awhile and need to release my tension with these abusive people by letting go of my inhibitions. It's basically just yelling at them, feeling all my sensitive boundaries and then trying to move on without them. I guess I really need to shout at them for awhile now.