Good Morning, World!

This is a huge problem that I'm noticing for myself. I'm staring to my left wall right now on the corner- yes, all those long and thick covered books that never have been opened are pretty much like praying to me that I go open it up and finish the book. Those books want me to get sucked into a world where I feel like I'm zapped into outer space for twenty-four hours. Afterward, I would need to shut down my imaginary rocket ship and then go into a literary coma for say, 48 hours without waking up uninterrupted. Haha, I wish- I would be waking up with bloodshot eyes going to the bathroom and then people like my sibling would bust into my room- "Hey Earl, I need to use your computer." My mom would be like, "Hey Earl, your laundry is done. Stop being a lazy boy and go out and get yourself a job." But mom, I would think- I already have a job.

I wish I would be called the most original man in the world by saying that life is like a bunch of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get haha. I'm starting to pick up on what my friend means when he says that he's under God's good humor haha. I'm sort of feeling for him right now because he's not used to trying to provide for himself because he wants to make it big in terms of having cash flow by working two jobs right now.

I have two jobs too practically, just that I'm having so much fun with them. It's like I'm playing at my work and just stressing out over having to pay my dues for doing business. I wish I could have a flawless record in having to pay no expense and that whatever I do, money just comes in and I didn't have to pay stuff out of my own pocket. In due time, this state may come.

Revealing Something Private

Obviously, this site could be my weakness because I've been writing about nothing but my full honest and straight-forward approach with all the conditions I want to put on this blog haha. If I was sworn to secrecy for a certain time period, then I obviously wouldn't get involved with touching the subject even in my own diary! Wow??? I don't know, I'm just trying to be honest in actuality about myself haha.

Okay, so I guess if a person still goes to that tiresome group of young adults who act like kids- that church I don't want to even spell out anymore because I think the reader should know which one I'm talking about by now. I heard from F. Chick (haha) that Betty Lam left the group and isn't part of it anymore and that it would be pretty rare if she does show up to the group. For some reason, the main thing I want to establish is something with Betty now, if I were to go back to that odd church. I guess I don't really care about Jarred and Annie blocking me on Facebook and looking a little despicable to me.

I know there's something cute about Betty underneath her that would make her act more decent than her other weird peers haha so that's why I had this haunch to remove her from my list of weird people haha. In my opinion, she's more brought up to be a lady in the proper context of the Bible so it would be really hard for her to stick around influences that are discomforting and bring displeasure. A Christian guy has the element of being able to lead in some area at times, so like this problem which I don't really see as a big one of people not wanting to be around me from being uncomfortable isn't such a big deal to me anymore. It's not like I'm meaning to be a bad person, which I would be able to tell by opening up to the person who wants to try to give me advice. Some of those moments can get a little abusive and bothersome to me, then that's where I might do something interesting and make the guy look pretty bad.

Honestly, it's really hard for me to open up about the bad things with Annie and Lee (she's the one with the restraining order) because they're simply female. It's so easy to let it rip about Jarred or Chris, so that's the difference I'm noticing. I'm not really sure about this but maybe when a girl approaches you thinking she can advise you somewhere over something she takes seriously, then maybe it's because she really cares for you somewhere or can develop those types of feelings for you later down the road, if you are a guy. Lee was trying to give me advice in an impatient manner, while claiming she had practically all the patience in the world- so from that statement at the start, it's already messed up from the start and whatever she's trying to get me to do was going nowhere, and this is what happened for her to really frustrate her. I was honestly trying to say that I was going to put a very smooth move on Betty just to bother Lee for fun and teaching her a lesson. To set the table straight, I'm still not intending on making Betty my girlfriend haha.

I mentioned from an earlier post that I liked Annie a little more than Betty so I could be on a safe side. After reasoning it out now, I realize that I like Betty now a whole heck of a lot more. I truly hope Betty can work things out in her life, wherever she ends up because I'm feeling that I'm genuinely her friend no matter what she's feeling about with me. Yes, this means also respecting her privacy and I'm only talking enough about her with the things that I need to write about to express myself in an honest manner. Honestly, I just want her to pick up the phone or something and work with me on experiencing an acceptable and healthy relationship. If she responds with a restraining order or something like that, it's not really going to bother me because at least she's saying something in her response. Even if she says nothing, I'm not trying to marry her anyway haha so it's all unconditional because of this strong desire to be her friend. In a way, I believe that no matter what you do you won't really be able to seek a full punishment on someone whose really acting and sounding like a true friend to you.

Dedicate To Predicate It

Washing dishes, so I could hang out with a lady and get ditched.
Making plans, so I could do something random and get banned.
...

I'm just kidding about the random sentences haha. Because of my energy level being so hot and high right now, I'm not going to spend some fun time playing cool video games unless I'm working on designing one. I want to focus on making a living and being a healthy person, so I need to do productive stuff even though a lot of these ideas that I have planned could be actually fun on the long run. What's keeping me, could be about being personally intimidated with myself- they say that the worst enemy is yourself. 

Right now, I want to get ahead of the pack doing the things that I'm totally interested in doing. I have two different styles that could take up my whole time right now. I heard from a business seminar which I found myself really lucky to be a part of thanks to a smart and independent optometrist whose a good friend of mine, that a person can only handle two big jobs and that a banker won't consider financing his third business! Those two self-employed jobs are probably going to be composed about 90% of my time right now because I don't really have to focus on providing for a wife right now.

I'm heavily having so much fun with my work and will never give it up because I only need to ideally put in three hours a day tops to make a good earning. It's so exciting because volatility plays a huge role in my business and that I can take advantage of an economic situation prospering or getting worse! In other words, it's recession proof. I might have to tie the knot pretty soon or just let it go for a lifetime; either way I go, I'll learn to manage but I'm currently leaning towards a Christian marriage that has a lot of good perks in it haha. I would tell the girl I've been mentioning about, Betty - "Well, I don't think we're really cut out for each other in reaching a term of spousal endearment or being dating partners, but definitely we should keep in contact buddy." Hahaha

Hope The Good Feeling Carries Through

I'm not too sure what I should write about right now, as this is my daily routine for me. I'm pretty much feeling like I've run out of ideas like an idiot. All I can really meander about is what I really want to accomplish every day. I want to bust it out and make a million bucks, just like possibly almost everybody would want haha. Okay, that was a little fun to write.

I'm seriously so bored about writing about how bad that church was haha. I still think about some of the girls there impulsively and inadvertently, not to the point of like following them around haha. I feel like beating up some of the immature boys there too for being inarticulate with me and intractable in socializing with some decency. They just seem to blow up whenever I talk about something with them politely because they can't handle their anger properly, so that means they should have never tried to help me in the first place and that I should be helping them out because I'm aware of what their problem is haha.

I don't want to go back because I'll have to do lots of painful work in helping them out haha. I just lacked confidence at that key moment when I should have really busted out with it. Oh well, now that I do, I see that if I'm communicating honestly with people then I feel confident about myself and seeing the negatives of myself so it balances itself out for me. Man, people really tire out in arguing with me if I just express it with a straight-forward style and feel really stressed out with me saying stuff to them to the point that they don't want to complete whatever they had intended on discussing with me haha. I should do that next time, if I show up to the weird church for laughs and then they want to stand me up or I could talk in this manner to the police when I had every intention of leaving in the first place before and then trouble started and I had absolutely no idea they were doing that to me haha. I'll do this after Lee's weird restraining order takes me off the hook haha because thinking about it daily now is getting me to laugh pretty heavily about it. I guess if I'm bored, I could just think about funny stuff from the weird group I've been writing about being weird to me.

I'm tired of listing out the names of my weird people list. I should just focus on one- I would pick Betty Lam because I took her off the list haha. I wouldn't really have anything bad to say about her, so I guess I'm taking like an easy walk in the park discussing about her haha.

Little Changes

Currently, I'm pretty much developing a skill to be a day trader and having a lot of fun with it. I just can't seem to resist the deal of mixing it up a little by also playing some free online poker games, which offer a little money for placing in a tournament. I'm going to see if I can build up some bankroll by playing those free games, and I know everything is going to be about the long term so I'll see where I end up.

My robot still needs a lot of work on it. I guess my ideology is pretty flawed because of the volatility I'm experiencing in the market, so I'm going to have to adjust it up a little and add a little more tools to have enough information. My current idea does work sometimes, but not that accurate as I would have hoped.

I also have a pretty cool offer to be a volunteer programmer which would give me some neat, professional experience. I'm going to discuss what it's about with the President of the non-profit organization. It would be cool to get some real life experience and use it on my road to becoming a game programmer.

Technically, I do have a job even though I'm not working at a company and have so much time on my hands. I'm also at the final week of the first stage in my growing taller program haha- I've been doing it for about 6 months straight and experienced just an inch of growth in my height, which isn't too bad for my age of 27. I'm probably going to keep on trying to get taller past my 30s because I just want to stop caring about feeling so short. It's funny that my mom seems to point out that certain people look very small, and it feels like that person resembles me but when I ask her if she thinks I'm a small person too, she says no haha.

Oh yeah, I have something impossible that I want to set out to do, which really bugs some people when I mention it. I've said it a few times already on this blog- I want to be a doctor who doesn't get paid to do it. At the age of 40, if I don't get into medical school by then, I may just go back to school and major in being a Physician's Assistant. Basically, I'll study something related to the medical field because I want to know more about how I could be optimally healthy and assist others regarding it as a short-term volunteer in some third-world country with a good church or some charity. I want to be wealthy enough by then, so I wouldn't have to accept payment as a doctor.

Whatever Is Lovely, Think On These Things

Pretty much, it's getting to the point where I really don't care that much anymore about how bad some people were over at that weird church called Hope of God Church in Los Angeles, CA haha. I'm not about to go back there now anymore because some guy who I brought over and has been going there, who I introduced as the weird guy F. Chick haha on this blog, has been telling me that it gets quite boring except for the meals they give out haha. I heard that for one week, he actually kept himself from going because he sort of felt bad about freeloading that one time haha.

Oh well, he may be unusual and have some mental growing up issues haha from probably being a little too hyperactive, I'm seriously not sure if he'd be diagnosed with ADHD but nonetheless, he tries to give himself credit a little overboard whenever he can. I also hope that he doesn't put his hands in the wrong places and end up in jail. I sort of want to reach out to him through prayer and communicating with him about the gospel because I believe that his life could dramatically change and that he'd experience quite a bit more stability if he could accept Jesus into his heart.

More and more, I'm learning to uphold good confidence in pure things and with a peaceful mindset. I'm pretty much becoming an old adult, but I still have this energy buried underneath me that makes me feel like a happy child. It's the energy that comes from studying, so does that make me a smarter person? I'm not so sure about that because it really deals with how much time you put into it.

I'm finding some passionate grounds with programming which I'm doing right now to try to make an earning off of it, and it feels really good to me. I guess I'm meant to be a self-employed programmer making money doing something related to owning my own S-corporation haha. A friend told me that I need to set up my own business bank account to avoid any complicated audits with the IRS which I need to get a move on with doing. Right now, I'm a little behind with the payments right now and I'm still in bare existence so it will take a little longer for me before I get to experience some profit and then start paying taxes as a legit business owner.

Catch Up Phrases

1. Where's the Ketch-up?
2. The cheese is so old and moldy, where's the bathroom? hahaha (I see two meanings- one is pretty impure for the immature brain)
3. Girls!!! All I really want is Girls!!!
4. If I were to die tonight with you by my side, I'd be a very happy man. (Is the person a man or woman?)
5. The Lord of Heaven looks down upon someone He wishes to express undying love and He definitely chose you!
6. Where's the stiletto because your shadow of the earth decided to die from me seeing nothing but beauty all around your body inward and outward?

I basically made a random post again because I needed to catch up with two posts today. Repeat this phrase out loud for fun: "Wow, I'm such a goal-oriented person- let's see what do I need to accomplish today?"

Back From The Holiday

I pretty much went snowboarding yesterday over at Southern California near the high mountains. I didn't really know that snow could actually fall there throughout last weekend, which my mom told me was on the newspaper yesterday. Yeah, I'm pretty decent at snowboarding now and can actually go down a black diamond pretty smoothly and in control of my board. There's sort of a way to take it slow; otherwise, taking a fall could mean going for a tumble down the steep hill covered in snow.

Going snowboarding yesterday with some friends felt like a nice accomplishment for a holiday. I've been receiving some junk calls repetitively from this one number throughout the day and oddly, I only received a call from it just one time haha. I remember how I kept on leaving some random messages about some argument with people that they couldn't let go repetitively and the person each time just couldn't handle it and blocked me on their cell phone and Facebook and e-mails haha. I would try to be really nice with them upfront and they would just blow up on me, causing other people to think that I was doing something wrong to them.  I believe that I was dealing with some losers, and I guess it happens haha.

There's some humor I found in the actions that I did with the people now, so why do I have to be a stupid person and be so angry about it still? Anyhow, I just rambled on from the topic of receiving a junk call which basically just calls you with no response when you pick up and never leaves a voice message. This type of call actually bugs some people more than just leaving something on their voice message. Jarred Taing, the problematic and weird guy I was mentioning in my personal, weird people category told me that he was trying to save some money by blocking me on his cell haha. That's what a voice message is really used for, which is leaving messages so in a way he was lying to me because he didn't know how to handle himself at the time I was dealing with him.

Obviously, because of the argument that took place, I could pretty much cause almost an unlimited amount of embarrassment to the people involved in my weird people category now if I really wanted to and it won't really be about revenge either but mainly about dealing with an argument now. In a way, it's a proper way of executing things pretty well because they still have some things that they'll always have to work on and probably will never understand for the rest of their lives now.

Personal Update

I guess I'm becoming more of a person whose acting upon what he said. I remember back then when I really didn't want to go to the weird church where they just kept on refusing to understand me, I wrote that I was coming the next week. I really didn't feel like going but just went because I said I was going and wanted to be a man of my word haha. Now, I don't really want to go because I'm going to be more honest and prefer procrastinating as long as I can in showing up now.

I don't need to be at a weird church to have a relationship with God in the first place. Neither do I really need them to allow for God to bless me with a stable life, like good income and family. As a believer, a lot of my actions are about wanting to willfully repent from some sinful desires that I couldn't help but engaged in. I believe that I'm forgiven under my faith in Christ and will continue to try to life a life of repentance. I want to be hardworking now and do more charitable things for people who are really in need.

This might make some people want to cry or overlook this goal of mine. I want to go to medical school to be a doctor who volunteers and doesn't get paid for it. I believe that my major source of income is going to come from developing into a talented day trader, which I believe is getting really close for me now. I do have an automated program which I wrote from analyzing the market for awhile, and I also do see that I'm probably going to modify it a little to hopefully gain a bit more accuracy in the category of better reward to lowered risk. Most of the successful traders prefer seeing the best trades and entering them manually. I'm sort of noticing that I'm having a little hard time being at the computer when the market seems to be trending, so hopefully my program will pick up some pieces on it, and then apply some good management principles, which seems to prevent a winning trade from becoming a bad one. My winning percentage is truthfully about 70-80% and the minimum gain is a 20% increase of the account balance each month. No, I am not kidding about this.

I'm really excited to be playing the most financially, liquidated market in the world right now. I gave a short tutorial for a friend already, and he seemed to catch on pretty well for the first session. I was trying to set him up on a simple way to realize when the market is going good. I think his trading style may be that of a scalper, which is playing in a market for a pretty short time and generating some quick profit and then exiting the market.

There's a job that I personally believe that I would never get tired of and would really love it- being a game programmer. I'm going to work on programming some games while day trading successfully and hopefully catch a break with the game programming. Maybe, I could end up in a nice team of a reputable company or form one with some good and talented friends which would be nice.

Finished Product

I feel really good because I finally finished a complicated program that's going to generate money for me automatically. Obviously, there are other people out there too who probably might be able to make more than me, so my program is something that I put a lot of time into - about 1 in a half weeks to finish with about 6 months of experience in learning about the field I'm doing.

So I'm hoping that by me opening up just a tad about my programming skills and having this robot that's doing work for me isn't going to get some thieves to break into my house and steal the prototype because I'd rather they look into someone else and not me haha. I'm just one of those types who wants to keep this money and donate it to really good charities and also have enough to do pretty fun stuff and I also don't mind hooking up some friends. Instead of being a thief, just be my friend and most likely I'll try to help you out in getting something stable to sustain yourself. It's just that I think so differently that even if someone were to steal my ideas then maybe they wouldn't know what to really do with it, so they would need my guidance so I hope nobody is really thinking about stealing this new program that I have now.

I personally am going to state that I'm not the best to go after, so at gun point I'd probably be shot dead so I'm not the right person to pick haha. Let me donate this money to really good charities that really help the needy, instead of trying to steal it for your own benefit. I also want to have enough to support good friends, so by definition of a friend, I'm also selective in who I give it to and I'm aware of social engineering tactics so I'll be very tough to convince, but I'll still be your friend and maybe buy you a complimentary meal if you so crave in getting to know me. Maybe if I get mad for some reason and you're trying to steal my money for reals and I don't realize it, I might make you go with me to Magic Mountain and ride those crazy rides with me over and over again after eating lots of food, so I can do that because I have a pretty big adrenaline rush that the food doesn't bother my stomach and because I'm determined. So, the sight of seeing some throwing up might be funny to me, and I'll be like let's do it again the next day.Oh, I'll probably be more discreet about these personally funny motivations if it ends up being a pretty crazy girl I hang out with.

A Fragment of Our Existence

My mind is today just trying to whiz through the motions of what it set out to do. I pretty much only took about five minutes to read a few pages of the Bible really fast a minute ago while I was sitting here to write something on this blog. A topic that I find interesting from having read the Bible for a few days now is unintentional sin and still being guilty of it, even if we didn't mean to sin because of the intent. I recall from listening to some sermons that sin is characterized as pleasurable. I really need to ask this question- where do we draw the line of being satisfied and obtaining pleasure without committing sin?   

From exploring myself quite a bit, I feel that our passions are God-given elements that will help us to acquire what we're looking for in that ultimate peace and direction. Obviously, they can also be neglected or abused by some of us. Thinking from a God-centered, Biblical perspective, people are placed in a light that really examines their hearts and sometimes, we hear a calling of how our ways are evil and wishing to let go of a sin that's been messing with us for some time. The power of the gospel is pretty much equated from placing faith on the Son of God who gave up his life and even died in a very painful manner through being nailed on the cross so that God would treat His perfect Son as sin. Through God's justice system, it has been said that no sin will go unpunished according to the Bible. The Bible says that God's love is patient and slow to anger. With the Father sending His Son to allegedly fulfill a prophecy of the Old Testament, the Son became the perfect lamb that was supposed to be sacrificed for the sins of all who wish to be followers of God in the Bible we know about today.

I remember I was hammered by a believer who kept saying that you need to repent from your old, evil ways and turn to a new direction of hope to find this new relief that is filled with a new raw sense of peace and joyfulness. In other words, believers repent because they simply choose to accept Christ into their hearts and follow after their glorious and marvelous God. Repentance is pretty much one of the fruits that mark the life of a true believer who strives to have some fellowship with God. Lives have pretty much changed because of this simple message that asks us to put faith in a loving God, which is based on reasonable faith as probably determined by some Christian researchers who strive to put together a more intelligent model of life as supposed to the evolution theory, which I find a little hard to accept right now because of some missing puzzles that have to be inferred or deducted based on the Earth being billions of years old which is a little hard because can the sun actually last that long? Wouldn't some form of entropy take place by then, which is a mathematical form of eventual chaos in the universe from having gone long enough?

Becoming Successful

Keeping up is not always an easy task especially if you've fallen behind something. Take for instance, if you're in school and just wait until the last minute and then have all these projects piled up which you never really completed at the end, then you're most likely in for a very long night trying to complete them. I remember when I was in school, I waited until the last minute on programming some complicated tasks and man, they took me all night because I was at the computer falling asleep and my mind would just be so fixated on figuring out a logical solution to programming while my body would just feel like falling asleep.

I don't really know how I managed to successfully complete a college degree from all the procrastination I did, but here I am world haha. What I've learned to value now is sticking to something that really helps you out which deals with anything. I would rather develop passion for something instead of having an addiction or obsession for something else. These two entities of a person are completely different from each other and can be occasionally confused by others.

I'm realizing that it's a really good thing to have something to look forward to each day, and it's something that I've personally achieved from the struggles of finding something that would help sustain me economically. I guess I'm like most people where I would prefer working hard to stay at the top. Finding this direction really came from overcoming my anxieties and trying to be diligent consistently while having patience. In a way, I was thinking differently somewhere because where I'm at is actually a very difficult place to get for the majority of people in this world- to be a little more exact, 95% of the people will fail with what I'm currently doing. Unfortunately, this statistical fact alone seems to already deter most of my friends and family if I openly share it from joining my field and coming up with some excuses even though I might become a living millionaire and offer a little help.  

Interesting Thought On Friendship With Girls

Okay, this topic is going to have to be at least a little mature this time around. I feel like I want to end this post after writing the first sentence. Okay, I think the main thing I'm realizing is that I'm capable of being comfortable around girls now, no matter how crazy I think they are sometimes haha. I believe that the title has been brought to my attention because the world did just pass Valentine's Day- I pretty much got a call from a friend saying how he really needed a girlfriend and pretty much says the same thing over again and doesn't make any sense how he's going to go about it haha. He must be having trouble understanding the boundaries of lust and true love right now from being desperate because he likes to see the "hotness" of almost every girl who appears before his very eyes- I'm pretty much telling him that they look average because he says it too often with me haha. Bluntly, I was asking myself sometimes if it was true love because beauty is in the eye of the beholder and I didn't find some girls he was mentioning about and going "She's hot and she's hot" all over the place haha that interesting to stare at all the time.

I also have been receiving these e-mails on the topic of seducing women, which I don't really take seriously but look at to see if the writer is making any sense. I'm also up bright and early today from having shut down right at night time and waking up early yesterday. Today's topic was on how to carry on a bright conversation with the woman of your dreams - haha. It has to deal with something like keeping it interesting for the lady and spicing it up a little and then playing Rocks, papers, scissors haha. I'm just kidding about the last part which is just an example of having some fun like when we were all children.

I've pretty much adopted a straight-forward approach and through this honesty, I'd like to say that I don't like to be boring haha. Being personally comfortable is a major asset for a male in my opinion especially if he really wants to be considerate over people's emotions. I only had a glimpse of what women can feel like when they want to avoid you and then start arguing with you over something so small. During these moments, it really needs to be her hubby's role to lead her well and keep her feeling genuine like having good welfare from feeling loved and getting attended to.

In the beginning, when things seem to be so lost like weird and average looking girls are blocking you on Facebook haha, and then you go up to ask about it and she's really meaning to give you a girly punch that knocks you out haha, I really wouldn't take it too seriously even if you end up getting thrown out of doing activities with those weird girls haha. Yeah, I'm a little different in a good way because I value friendship in people more than I would in taking advantage of girls for my pleasure haha. It may have hurt at the start but looking back at it, it's not that very tough to fix and no time has really been lost over it even if you were sent to jail for it. I'm not saying that I went to jail, but it looks like the fear of getting gang-raped at a prison so it makes you chicken out over little issues doesn't make any sense haha.

I believe that to make sense and get pretty formidable results, the man has to man up by being straight-forward with anybody he wants to deal with. Even if it means busting out with a little bit of testosterone and yelling like a mighty drill sergeant, as long as the guy can come to terms with it a little sooner than expected and stay honest about what he wants to desire instead of staying the role of an overreacting jerk which I want to punch the heck out of but I have to control those urges somehow if I spear him to the floor. 

Facing Jury Duty

I'm currently one of the few unlucky people here with me waiting to be called up for the dreaded jury service. Obviously, not everybody thinks the way I do and it's just a joke. The thing that I'm currently on is one of the few computer stations and it's crowded right now so I guess I'm lucky that I get to use this machine for now. I might just get off and just lay down on the vacant seats and then just start sleeping.

Well, you do get paid for jury duty and I'm not going to say the amount that you get paid for it. Let's just say that it's not all about the money in being a juror. I sort of hope that I don't get stuck in one of those 10 day or longer trials because I have the time for it. The interesting thing about being a juror is that I remember the judge telling us to not discuss any details publically about the court case I served as a juror previously, so on this blog my bloody fingers are locked in place and won't dish out like I'm doing about Washington and Lee for their interesting and weird restraining orders that they placed on me separately at different periods. Washington and Lee would sound like a pretty funny and weird couple but I wonder how cute their chemistry would be. That sounds like a full name, Washington Lee haha.

Well, I do get a free parking spot for being a juror in a courthouse. I wish I had that when I was visiting the courthouse frequently to get more information on what a civil restraining order was about. I kept on asking people and going different places for advice on how to get this off, but from realizing through all the struggles it isn't really that bad and won't attract so much media attention if it's about some crazy people doing it to you anyway.

I don't mind opening up and being so blatantly honest about it to people who don't want to listen to me. Yeah, it's odd that people at a small church who claim to want it to grow would act so flighty with me like that and not be able to pay attention to the details I was trying to let out. Well, I personally can't recommend people to go that church because of my own personal experiences but I will be attending there again as a visitor once Lee's restraining order can't be dangerous to me anymore and is too outdated- the actual date is something I can't really set up and if I did I wouldn't let them know I'll be there- so it's going to have to be like them not being able to expect anything or know anything that's going to happen through me. Pretty much, they won't have any preparation time and will be thrown off guard this time around. Anything that they tell me they'll do in advance or calling it a warning or whatever they want to say is something I will be to work around now, and I'll be using a lot of honesty to get what I need from them. I don't need them to do anything back for me to get what I really want, which is probably going to make them feel not so depended on.

I have to go back to my jury service and I'll see if I can get out of it through using this restraining order as an excuse. Just making a quick update, this is where I reveal that I can edit my posts sometimes because I realize some spelling errors and grammatical errors so I actually end up fixing them, until I don't care what I have up there and will just leave those silly errors.

The average length of this trial will be 20 days! Oh my gosh, 20 days??? Actually, I think I'm automatically excluded by default because I listed that I'm self-employed with 0 days of compensation for pay, even though I'm actually unemployed so I might get off heh heh. I'm guessing that the trial is something that deserves attention for capital punishment which I don't really want to make a responsible decision over right now, but will if I have to live up to this duty of being a voter.

Happy Valentine's Day

About going to Jury Duty, I need to call back during the evening time to see what's up. Looks like they are going to postpone it or maybe they'll say that I don't need to show up. I sort of have my fingers crossed right now. I wonder if I can say that I have a restraining order and never went to jail for it- that it's related to something like a business putting a restraining order on you. I guess it would imply that I want the business to lose a lot of money, so that I can buy them out later and then make profits start soaring again.

Now I realize that the world doesn't even care that I have weird restraining orders because I got called up for Jury Duty still. I think if I was a major criminal, then they wouldn't even consider me by default. Because of this realization, I'm going to pretty much go with the assumption that I don't have any restraining orders while counting the fact that I don't really want to be around Washington and Lee who put them on me anyway.

A civil restraining order is pretty much saying that you're chickening out of an argument or something like that in my case and that you just want to end a relationship because you don't know how to handle yourself dealing with the situation. By accepting really no punishment because I'm assuming Wash and Lee are both pretty crazy anyway, I'm still working on a pretty lucrative job right now and I'm still hanging out with beautiful people and having tons of fun so there's really nothing to it at all.

The problem that occurred is that they panicked or faced a lot of anxiety from messing up somewhere in their lives and having some type of fear of being exposed too much by me. It was pretty much about them being selfish somewhere. I don't really need to be mad because I'm still making a pretty healthy living and have some good friends to hang around with. Since they put something weird on me and failed to put me in prison for it, I'm pretty much exposing who they are because that's not what the restraining order is about anyway. I'm going to remain in honesty because through it, it gives me some leverage of not needing to panic like they did.

Watch the day I go back to the weird church, Lee is probably going to keep her distance with me and not even get involved somewhere with me even if she doesn't like what I'm doing and even if people say bad stuff about me which is probably just playing some messy Christian songs on the piano and annoying everybody about it for laughs. I could approach Lee after this is all over and just start making fun of her about it while using honesty which will pretty much be true and then if she overreacts again then I know that I was being truthful so that would mean she's crazy from not being able to handle the truth and really even lose more respect from everybody. Hey, I'm being direct now because I tried to be about nice about in a less direct tone because they didn't want to listen so for my own benefit, if I'm directly honest with them even if they don't know how to listen to me from them not being able to control their emotions, at least I have a point of stability for myself.

Jury Duty On Valentine's Day

I got a weird notice last month, which was to show up for a Jury Duty summons tomorrow. I might get out of it, but I'm not too sure because I do have enough time to show up for listening to a trial. I've also served in a jury before, and I was the last panel that was selected which was a bummer for me back then.

I think with my problems dealing with people- the ones who were overreacting quite a bit no longer want to do that with me now. The world as a whole does not care about these little things that I did which wouldn't even make sense to get angry about anyway unless the person was just mentally unstable to begin with. I have a knack for slightly crazy people whether I know them or to really want to distance themselves from me or show some aggressive sign of it through anything. I guess I shouldn't really worry about it too much then because I'm ensured more privacy anyway.

What I Heard Last Night

This is going to be a pretty long post and to top it off, my last four paragraphs will be my conclusion. Yesterday night was quite a bit of fun for me. Even though my dad prides himself in saying that my genes can hold a lot of liquor, I don't engage in heavy drinking. I sometimes drink wine in moderation, and it's sometimes fun to have a bottle of cold beer with friends while doing something like watching a football game together. My argument for those anti-alcohol people is that Jesus drank a little wine back then too like the time he turned water into the best wine you could imagine at a marriage as a miracle- I heard that back then where Jesus resided that wine was usually cleaner than water and helped a little for their health. 

I hung out with a largely predominant female crowd last night at a lounge and according to my friend, he would say that I engaged in some conversation with the prettiest girl at the bar haha. He wanted to take my seat haha and I offered to even switch beverages with him and then he declined haha. I drank this cool looking beverage which is all blue and they call it Holy Water; I only had a shot of it so it didn't really affect me that much, just that I was in the mood to go dancing to some crazy techno music afterward. I sort of started getting up and moving my body around to the beat so yeah, I started dancing in place to get that loose feeling out of my body. I was trying to drag my friend to go together to meet those random girls who were just dancing in place, just for laughs and see what he would get out of it- he's so shy and he never budged out of his seat haha. It really helped me to take out that energy a little because I was still driving back home- I was very conservative and driving like a grandma when I went back home with my buddy who felt I would get pulled over by an officer for driving too slow.

I was thinking to myself the whole night that I'm actually comfortable with good looking people haha. I guess that's why I had fun and then a couple of the girls had a little too much because they drank other people's cups from some of the people not being able to handle a small amount of alcohol. It was pretty funny because the friend who invited me was one of the girls who became intoxicated and then started trying to coach me about how I should get to know women haha and that she wanted me to observe how people are. She told me that some people don't want to be around me and are uncomfortable with me as her excuse for trying to coach me haha. Yeah, it hurt me a little to hear that but in the end my mind was thinking "Cool!" Here's an analogy dealing with people, one of the greatest You-Tube videos have the worst haters to have ever viewed it. In other words, you can't find a video that has everybody hitting the like button but I found some videos that had only "One" dislike out of at least 30,000 viewers and I even posted them on my Facebook. 

Taking her back to her friend's car and buckling her up felt a little heroic for me. When she put her arm around my shoulder, at the request of some ladies passing us by, I lifted her up and carried her down the pavement. My buddy decided to carry her a little and then became tired so fast haha. I let him transfer her back to me and then I became tired fast again because she didn't have her arm around my shoulder and it felt like I could drop her so I transferred her back to my friend and then he couldn't move. We ended up letting her walk the short remainder of the way.

While I was carrying my little female friend whose probably about average female weight, she kept on referring to how I'm so strong haha. I told her while I was getting a little fatigued that her weight was extremely light. I sort of used some love language with her while she was complaining and asking about stuff through her moment. It seemed to help her feel a little caressed and appreciated. I hope she doesn't get too drunk again after having about four glasses of small alcoholic beverages which doesn't seem that much- I was trying to get my buddy to man up a little and drink her last cup because I needed to drive back and avoid failing the breathalyzer test before she became too drunk, and he became disgusted over the drink- oh well.  

I finally feel really comfortable listening to comments about people saying things to me directly now. I guess I want this golden rule where a person and I are upfront with each other no matter what circumstances we go through. Even though I never created conflict directly with anybody at Hope of God Church L.A., and they said I did, I'm starting to not really mind anymore that they told me how they felt in a weird fashion.

I had a problem where I didn't like people yelling at me over stupid things, and this was what happened to me and sort of bothered me for awhile that I would probably want to go beat up the man over him not being able to let go of a conflict and overreacting too much. I personally discovered that being honest even if the person or people aren't willing to listen to me at the time, like the group I've been mentioning about except for Betty Lam at the same church who I'm finally really realizing what she's been meaning to say with me, really helps me from overreacting tenfold.

I no longer fear punishment over wrongdoing I never committed and am willing to take a chance to stand up for what I believe in. I have pretty strong ideals that I can bust out this type of courage now. Like I said before, maybe if I acted a certain way then Betty would get pretty crazy with me like giving those signs that pop up in movies where friends go from mortal enemies into lovers haha.

Well, Betty has a different ethnicity than mine and I'm not really that interested in learning more about her culture right now because of what I heard through some bad news from my mom. I seem to be having an easier time getting the weird and funny care-group, even though they were meaning to be serious with me, out of my mind. I'm definitely going to be upfront with them the day I go back, and if I get mad at a lady there, I obviously can't hurt her physically or anybody else as I probably would take that energy and use it to get physical with any of these guys: Chris, Jarred, Bae, Chai, or Golf. So if one of them feels ditzy with me around very often the day I go back and I'm still making progress being at the weird church (sorry), I must be feeling really angry at a girl who I think is being weird.

   

Programming Update

Since I'm a programmer and haven't done it in awhile, yes, I have a cool computer degree from studying to be a programmer (Computer Science) and I'm into hacking systems of weird people who think giving me a hard time is king haha- no, I probably won't ever get around to hacking some systems at a small church I've been talking about (Hope of God Church L.A.) but I do figure they were really weird though now that I recall enough facts, and I'm no longer nervous about them being dumb with me.

I'm almost finished with my program which is going to make me some money. I was up and tweaking the code around to try to make it work and it actually worked finally! Because of my progress, I'm like 75% of the way done now because the hardest part was integrating many ideas together and I finally did it in one gulp with a programming session. It feels exciting because I'm going to be playing in a market with my ideas (had a lot of help with some concepts I don't understand) and a program that I created for myself. Obviously, you can't have perfect winners all the time so if someone wants to steal my idea they might be in for losing some money.

It's really all about your personality when it comes to what you like with making money and to stick to it. A pretty good friend of mine is selling stuff on ebay and he made his first sale already after investing quite a substantial amount. He seems to know what he's doing to make small sales like that. I believe that mastery of your own psychology is a principle in being successful at your own business and to also figure out how to make money while managing your own risk- this could come from your own ideas, experience, and research or from even purchasing a system or education you have faith in. I know how some failures like to blame products that they tried out, so I'm pretty scared about putting my money maker out there because it's my personal pet project that always needs some constant support and won't probably ever be nearly as perfect as the others that are already there which perform well. I might as well just keep it to myself and let it rake up some money for me and then diversify a little into other related fields or pursue after other passions or hobbies with the living I make off of from using my head that fits my preferences.

I guess I could spend a little time promoting the good systems that work out there too- like the guys who really put themselves in the coffee grinder for at least a few years to develop an exquisite system that really takes care of you. I only needed to spend maybe about 10 hours so far to get this far in my programming journey but that's because I cheated a little from using some ideas that I found to work from people who already crafted them. 

What's Going On, M8?

There's not much for me to talk about right now because it feels like I've pretty much beat the bush with everything I had to say about myself. Man, I must be a quite a boring person. Okay, that's a topic I could write about just for the sake of killing some time and to have a little fun with myself. Let's see, how can I be a boring person?

For one thing, I can do a lot of talking whether I'm feeling angry, sad, happy, feel like being funny, or etc. I guess talking is one characteristic that can make a person boring. Let's see, what's another one? I go around the bush a lot meaning that I tend to circumvent things and then come back to it later and seriously pretend I'm accomplishing an ambush with a person. The person just sits there and looks at me like "Okay, I didn't expect that" and then turns to the other person and continues talking about what's bothering him or her haha. Man, those people who just keep talking about what annoys them gets actually pretty boring eventually.

Let's see what am I doing right now? I'm pretty much programming right now to make some money. I'm also in the midst of going on this muscle building binge once I have enough money settled and to work on other cool projects like creating a personal computer that runs on a minimal DOS or Unix version and sorts the difficulty of Sodoku puzzles automatically. Wikipedia says there are 6,670,903,752,021,072,936,960 possible puzzles with Sudoku, and I'm glad some guys already did the math for me. I might have to leave that personal computer on and put like a 100 TB hard drive on it and 50 GB of RAM to get it working in solving and sorting at least 10% of all the possible puzzles- no, I'm just exaggerating for fun.

I'm thinking about doing it for fun and then letting people solve the most difficult problems and laughing at them for taking weeks to figure out the solution for free! I'll also run a small business where I print out random puzzles of whatever customized difficulty the customers want and put it in a book and then charge a minimal fee for shipping and handling and maybe ask for a extra few bucks to make a little money. I might be happy to donate a large portion of those frustrating Sodoku puzzles to hospitalized children or grandparents. Eh, I don't mind if someone takes this idea from me because I'll be replicating it anyway underground if they copyright it. 

Hey, did I also mention that I play a little piano and that I play enough of it to make a considerable good amount of discernible noise? Some people are like "Whoa, I didn't know you could play the piano." I'm like "So, I just play because I think it's fun." It's all about practice and man, I think two hours a day isn't enough to get good at mastering the piano. I can only put in about two hours at the maximum without feeling like I'm losing any time or getting bored. Yeah, two hours is such a short amount of time with playing the piano for me. I'm sure for the average person, it's such a drag especially if you don't play that well initially and are so testy about watching your favorite T.V. shows. I also sing discernible noise too and my mom noticed that I was singing acapella with Y.M.C.A. and I didn't sing "Y-M-C-A"; so does that make me a little better than I was before? I don't know but I know that I still suck.

What I Would Have Done Differently

This is a post that I'm writing, assuming that I'm already living a successful path. I believe that momentum builds on a person's character and that history of doing something is very important. I'm a little different than the average person because I believe that you can go back to something that you failed at later in life, if you realize that it will really give you fulfillment and just lacked some understanding about it.

There are some things I can't really reveal just to protect where I'm being selfish, so yeah, I guess I'll reveal what it is. I had these feelings of getting into fights, and I wonder if I would have won and think that I would have actually- I was tempted to get into those fights but held my ground and left with a happy feeling still, so I guess I try to be peaceful even while feeling like getting into a violent match where I would hold the guy on the ground and tell him to say "Mercy" and then apply pressure to the point that he would want to cry from not being able to breathe and then I would have to let go.

Despite this self-righteous feeling of winning a decisive fight, I seriously wonder that since I wasn't caught in the act of doing anything bad like forcing a girl to get drunk that she gets all her admirers to stand up for her haha [I watched a funny drama for a little bit] that there was really no substance for those guys (Chris Kuch and Jarred Daniel Taing of Hope of God Church) who were acting like jerks with me. Since they were prolonging the conflict through their anger, if I had been physical with them then they would have looked extremely bad- this is what I should have done and then moved on with my life. I just wasn't ready to do these kind of things because everything didn't seem to be in place back then. I'm ready to put everything in place and move on in about another 2-3 three years haha or maybe five years (I say this so that they won't realize or predict when I will be there). The guys are going to be scared with themselves and will see that their honest feelings are flawed; they're just going to be like a walking vegetable with me haha which means they won't create conflict with me as they did in the past by saying I did something wrong. I'm just going to focus on working out and building wealth and possibly settling down with the most beautiful wife haha.

So it's time for me to put aside this current past and realize that I'm bigger than it. The worst outcome to it is only that I got a weird restraining order from a girl who possibly liked me and that I was never into her anyway; I also didn't finish the physical act I had in mind of doing with those guys who created conflict with me by saying I did something wrong. I'm going to proceed with succeeding and then maybe I'll go back to the church after I'm set up so that I can leave officially while making a scene out of it with the weird boys (going to be somewhere around 30; they are physically normal so I have knowledge of that and they can do some intense physical workout if you force it upon them for a reasonable amount of time- they also can't fight or risk looking bad and are going to look bad anyway so they are at a wit's end) who created conflict with me haha in front of the few members who go to that church. It's only a few and not like a lot of people anyway. The building is pretty cozy so it gives that feeling that one person is taking up a lot of space. Gee, they are going to waste the time of police officers because I'll be long gone by then and they'll be wasting time taking me to court because I'll be using my full honesty and they'll just have opinions which won't counteract that well with facts from being absolutely honest to both sides to the best of my ability. Maybe those guys who created conflict with me will be gone for good from that church and so I won't have to worry about leaving the church permanently even though I have a spiritual direction already that I want to partake of. It doesn't matter what direction it goes but making a scene would be such a fun spectacle with those guys who thought they knew it all. I can do it with some class.

Starting To Feel For My Old Man

Growing up had some pains for my dad I think. Despite me being a little more behaved than other children, I had my moments which were considerably rare where my dad would try to discipline me for my mistakes from being angry occasionally. Back then, I didn't really know about self-defense and laughter and all of those other useful stuff that would have kept my old man's dignity with me. Since now I do and starting to realize that my old man is becoming cranky and sounding like that funny frustrated guy on a Korean radio talk show, I'm seeing that he's a really weak guy even though he continually exaggerates and yells a lot often haha. For a time being, I would get so angry if someone yelled at me and it would be one of those moments where I would want to wish ill-will with them like I had those types of feelings for Jarred when he kept on lashing out at me and maybe once or twice with Betty and the same with Lee, Annie, Chris, the pastor Chai, Bae, Golf, and F. Chick. Obviously all of these weird people with the exception of Betty (who I'm saying isn't weird) had something in common which was yelling at me over something exaggerated and creating conflict with me because they couldn't keep their mouths shut haha. Those feelings of ill-will and wishing bad karma or something like that haha lasted for awhile with those people.

I'm starting to realize that people yelling at me don't really help me or mean that much to me anyway. They are obviously weak somewhere in their lives if it's this over-exaggeration that they had to enforce upon me. I actually liked being yelled at by a coach though, which is different from actual people who are trying to train you; I really wanted to keep working harder and obviously, I was paying them to train me so it means they are so passionate about teaching me.

Back to the weird people yelling at me category, it's like this, I pretty much say they are wrong and enforce it so badly that I end up using my full anger in our conflict if they continually are not able to let it go and then if I do this in front of people, I leave the premises and then come back the next week with a calm attitude and this pretty much throws off the weird person. The weird person would probably not want to create conflict with me, which is natural and then I get to pretty much relax and let it go and not really worry about it that much.

Obviously, on the long run, I probably won't be able to stick around the premises if I had this type of conflict. Because I wanted to stay in the past, I didn't act out this way but it looks like it's inevitable and these types of overreactions from weird people are going to happen sometimes, so I need to take that into consideration at that Hope of God Church in Los Angeles. They said that I caused people to leave- I heard from a person who goes there that their caregroup (haha, not really a caregroup or a family is it if they think a restraining order is the best thing to prevent a conflict especially when I didn't put out my fists which I should have to joke around with the immature boys over there) is boring haha. It makes sense that they were pretty boring; I was going there to practically be bored with myself in emotion, but just practicing on my speech and writing interesting e-mails (that were so dualistic and making me laugh all the time because I understood my inside humor and they didn't) so that must have annoyed the heck out of them. I had fun talking to people there and I met some cute girls, just that they are not really my ethnicity; and I would have probably gained better experience in how to be a better friend. They totally sucked at being a friend to visitors; they were only taking advantage of how the house was at a girl's house and were about playing games to attract people- not about sustaining a church membership. Yeah, Chris and Jarred (why two Rs? haha)  over there were practically confusing themselves and trying to blame it on me with the way they sounded- saying that I created conflict. Actually, I didn't and I should have forced conflict upon them just to educate them on how different it really is.  Because one of the girls Lee who claims to pay rent and is like "Oh, I own this house" instead of "I'm sharing with my siblings and roommate" came out to be looking weird, I heard that the group isn't doing their struggling caregroup at her house anymore and somewhere else. Maybe they might try to gather at her house for a Christmas party or something which would be so funny and interesting to hear about from someone who talks to me even though it feels annoying that he forces himself upon me like that haha. It's the good kind of annoying which I admonish that people do to each other. It's just inadvertent and doesn't change if they are a weird or good person in my opinion haha.

With what I just put, it gets me thinking that Lee might have read a few of my blog posts as well and might be disguising something with her agreement despite her heavy initial disapproval of me. In other words, I still think Lee likes me somewhat and for maybe a little more than as friends but I'm not into her (compatibility issues) and probably won't ever be so this is an issue I'm going to have to disclose with her someday if she's still around. None of this height stuff (being short and her a little taller) really matters after all- even though I'm feeling pretty confident about my overall appearance and health haha. Let's say I was committed to my spouse then I would work on things with her to the best of my ability and stick to her like I was glued to her haha. I'm pretty fortunate that I'm not in some arranged marriage scheme haha.

Starting To Put It Together

My thinking right now is that if I'm not really that qualified to work in any really good job that sort of comes from my experience of submitting my resume to random companies online and filling out some job applications and getting no calls for interviews all in this state, then I might as well go after what I like doing to earn a living and go at it alone. I didn't feel fully comfortable about working with certain companies while I was submitting my resume, and I thought it was just because I wanted to be lazy. I guess I'm just truly brought up in a different fashion from an average standpoint that I really need some personal outlet instead of going to some place that's already made out for you and contributing.

Just imagine going after something you really want at full blast and having everything you need already that nothing is really going to disappoint you except yourself from becoming a jerk sometimes or something like that haha. It's this attitude and yeah, I may be behind some payments right now but I'm not fretting because I'm trying to work hard at what I want to do and leaving out these impulsive drives out of necessity and overdoing some things.

If I'm doing something that has the highest reward and highest risk right now and managing both so properly, then it's like I could be doing any job eventually that I set my heart on. I'll also gain skills necessary to learn something to achieve a goal or purpose.

What I wanted simply didn't sound right to my parents originally but when I told them about my short-term success with the amount of little time I spent on it, they started wondering differently and explaining that they were brought up on traditional values and never really thought what I was doing as possible. In a way, we're all taking a risk with whatever we're doing for a living and that it's just life in general so why not take a risk and create an earnings with something you really like doing instead of waking up disgruntled sometimes about having to go to work.

I'm working with something very complicated and trying to become successful at it and that pretty much fulfills a need for myself. I'm pretty much a passionate gamer of all sorts of things. I wanted to grow taller too, (haha) and I know how that sounds a little shallow but I managed to gain an inch in my height literally that even my friend feels like growing taller but is a little scared about getting too tall now if he was to apply my growing taller methods haha. I grew an inch at the age of 27 haha, amazing huh? Sometimes I feel like crying underneath when I walk past a tall lady but then if I get to used to her company, I just start not caring about it anymore. If I had a more average height like my dad then I would probably care less and less about my height and people being taller than me, so I guess that's what I'm at least aiming for with this journey of getting taller. I'm also stocky and heavy-framed so I don't want to feel stuck to the ground if I eat a lot because I can eat more than an average 200 pound adult haha. I usually weigh in at about 155 at the minimum and 175 at the max. Let's just say that my height belongs to the average short guy haha. If I reveal my height, it might surprise some people and they probably might not make fun of me about it.

Briefly, I guess some good people wonder about my love life. I'm just going to settle with one and stay true to her because one woman should already be a handful haha. I do have a criteria I'm looking for, so it's not just sticking my hand in the bag with my eyes closed and grabbing a candy bar randomly. I can say that the average girl is pretty nowadays in my view so looks are just going to be there anyway, so I might as well look for compatibility. The most beautiful girl is going to be the one I marry haha.

True Excitement

I'm living a pretty exciting life because I'm dealing with doing some things that I really like doing to make a living. It's a place where I can go to fully express myself and really keep my mind engaged on something that is very useful- the health of the world economy. Today is the superbowl so I'm pumped and excited about it and have a friend to watch it with- haha. Well, I'll go check out the superbowl after I finish attending a spiritual service today.

I'm pretty much living it up genuinely inside, and it came from taking baby steps of honestly knowing what I was about. I'm afraid some people are not really that gifted with intra-intelligence- for myself, I felt it was the most natural thing on earth and so they tried to cause problems for me. If I don't really see them as that big of a problem anymore, and they want to say I created a bigger problem for them then they're just a bunch of sore losers and babies that I shouldn't really worry about anyway.

I found that God really plays a role in restoring my spiritual and emotional health. One of the things I'm noticing is the attitude that's so powerful from having a grown foundation of faith in the almighty Jesus and living a life of true repentance. Some people are obviously wrong about their concepts and some people get turned off from the gospel from also having a misconception about the Bible so all of that seems to be pretty normal, but something the Lord could fix all in good time.

Superbowl Time!!!

Yeah, I'm pretty much excited about the superbowl like 76% of men in this nation are, according to some yahoo statistic I read up on. Did you know that a lot of these men prefer the superbowl over their marriage anniversary because it's an easier date to remember? I heard about these guys who have come to every single superbowl game since the first one that was ever hosted, so they are on a roll man which includes possibly three generations ahead of them.

I called up some friends of mine and they aren't really hosting a superbowl party; one of my friends is sort of soul mate hungry meaning he wants to get in some action with his soul mate but is so selective and careful that he's not meeting enough women. His twin brother (haha) is a little too gross in how he approaches women and says, "Beautiful" in his mind even if the girl rejects him- he just thinks about a better time in the past that he had this opportunity haha.

I totally believe if my friend's twin brother finds a relationship with God and seriously has a life-altering situation then he will be able to cope with the guilt, sorrows, and lack of intelligence by working really hard with a purpose and even become a wonderful testimony to God's people. I want in on trying to lead the twin to Christ; I believe that his mindset and academic ability will start soaring afterward. All the twin is doing is just thinking about a current past and saying positive things about it with the benefits he received from it and then referring to how he's better than you because of it- haha. He's like an overgrown baby with some psychological problems that look like it will never be able to be fixed; I believe that if he finds genuine faith, love, and hope in God he will have a dramatic turn-around in his life with his family and people (even those pretty girls he unintentionally thinks about annoying) and then be able to find a decent education. I honestly hope he never ends up in prison by doing something stupid to another girl, and it seems like he's a little scared underneath because he'll just joke about it when he's uncomfortable deep down inside with all those resentments and guilt; at least he can try to prove that he's better than you and say that he's always right while convincing himself haha. He seriously shows some characteristics of juvenile delinquency- I'm going to pray and hope he never gets a wrong impression from someone and then gets slammed for trying to please his selfish heart at the wrong place and wrong time. I hope God will be able to take hold of his heart and change it for the better purpose of His kingdom- this includes living in peace and harmony with others right now in this world. He's pretty much an enemy to everybody and only leeching off of people right now, while calling them friends because they give him a source of satisfaction. He's actually controllable in certain areas by using a little effort on creativity but what I want to do to him is give him the power to choose and let him go there himself on that journey that every man should be on for finding himself and those answers that set you on the right path. His sources of satisfaction are limited right now and it's really good because where he's going right now could end up being the best decision in his life. Overall, he might persecute me because of my faith and attempt to reach out to him about this wonderful faith but I'm okay with it.

Passover in Bible

I guess what I feel really good about is having read the Bible just right now about the coming Passover during Easter. The Pharaoh of Egypt in the book of Exodus was a very stubborn guy and wanted to pretty much wreak havoc on the Jews who were settled there, right after the population grew so large that it made the Egyptians feel very unsettled about them. Exodus 12:37 says That night the people of Israel left Rameses and started for Succoth. There were about 600,000 men, plus all the women and children. And they were all traveling on foot. I guess back then that would be a lot of people and might be like they were rubbing too close against your skin if you were an Egyptian. This is sort of like some Americans complaining about the Hispanic culture growing so huge in California haha. Not to mention, did you know that most of California used to belong to Mexico and that the U.S. purchased it after a war with them? Baja California still belongs to Mexico because of its beautiful location and scenery- it is a dazzling place which I had some luxury of visiting a couple years go. With the service there, they are pretty obsequious (butt-kissers haha) if you are a pretty decent person and tip well; for an Asian guy like me, I would do alright there haha. Overall, I believe it's racist to think bad about another race by the color of their skin in my opinion though. I can also reference it a little to how Hitler must have felt about the Jews about 70 years ago. So far, the major bad guys lost in the end haha and the World War II treacherous rulers had pretty much a spectacular suicide.   

God called on an extraordinary guy named Moses to lead all Jews who were settled there out of oppression. The Bible points out that God allowed for a lot of favorable things to happen so that the Pharaoh would change his very hardened heart and force Moses' people out of there. Exodus 12:36 says The Lord caused the Egyptians to look favorably on the Israelites, and they gave the Israelites whatever they asked for. So, like a victorious army, they plundered the Egyptians! The Egyptians were pretty cold and heartless by allowing for their ruler to decree that male babies of the Jews had to be murdered, which brings to a point that Moses was probably the most unique baby to be saved from this treachery and adopted by a royal Egyptian as her son. It looks like Moses had it made and could do whatever he wanted while growing up, but somehow Moses had to look back upon his people and serve them which was all part of God's masterful plan.
 
The Lord pretty much intends to work with everyone who would call upon Him. There is a life and death situation that could be filled if the person would allow for this Holy Spirit which is a part of God to enter into his or her life. God has paved a narrow road that pretty much commands us to let go of anything evil in our lives, which is sin and to come into a relationship with God's Son, Jesus. Sounds interesting? This is all based upon the Bible I'm reading.

Tweaking Plans

The hard work that becomes associated with doing something that has pretty good support from my mom is actually helpful to me. I know I've done some things like play poker for money, which my mom really goes against to try to make a living but it became pretty hard for me to stay intact with it.

The current business that I'm doing right now is what my mom is willing to support because of its potential rewarding nature, and the amount of responsibility one really needs to possess to go forward with it. The belief of holding stocks is comparatively different for my mom when it comes to gambling with some poker hands. Since I've taken interest in the currency market and developing an efficient system to earn a living off of, I've done fairly well with holding my grounds on it so far.

I'm starting to make a fair amount of breakthrough right now that really fits my personality. I'm also trying to add in more useful tools that would generate more profit fairly consistently for me. It seems like there's way more to this business I'm attracted to than just bluffing or holding the nuts in poker for getting all the money. This side business of mine is really going to supplement my other interests because it's just going to be paying dividends while I have lots of time to do other things that interest me. Making money after all this effort I put into it might turn into a leisured walk in the park. It's playing a role in alleviating my anxiety over having enough money and time and also contributing to satisfaction because I'm actually working for making a living.

The problem for this market is that to this day, 95% of all currency traders fail. The other 5% go on to succeed, and it looks like I'm in the 5%. It requires diligence and mastery over personal discipline and money management. It requires having enough passion to get to that desired position you're longing for. If you're interested in how much you need to start, the minimum capital is $500 and expect to break even at best your first month in the business. If you can afford to demo trade which means to make paper trades to test out your system, then that is the most recommended route to go for all beginners.

A possible problem could be the dilemma of having to use your capital and facing traps from having a fear of losing and greed. Everybody has gone through these issues in this market, I had to conquer my own through playing poker so I began with a slight head start over the average trader. The average trader in the beginning is going to lose it all, so no need to feel bad if it takes a long time to master this market. This is only if the person is literally going to be taking this path.  In a way, you really can't hustle the market- you have to let it come to you and need to develop a pretty good timed entry and exit. Basically, it's figuring out the highs and lows of the market and acting accordingly. In this market, you also can't be perfect all the time so expect to lose sometimes as long as in the end you're making profit- that's what makes us survive.

Oops

Oh, I didn't mean for the January column to have 32 posts. I guess I got a little carried away with the last post of last month. I'm still in the mood for trying to average 1 post / per day so that means that I'm going to lose one post this month. It would have been really interesting if it was leap year because I would have counted that extra day of the month.

Let's see, I guess I can talk a little about my Asian heritage- it's practically really old. My grandma of my mom's side has some ancient royal blood, which I never really knew until shortly after she passed away. It's a pretty big family tree because one of my friends is also in the same family tree but we aren't related to each other. Well, his last name is Lee so that makes sense. There's a celebrity also named Lee Lee- just making a little off the road joke.  This is a pretty cute site about the origin of the name Lee - http://www.thinkbabynames.com/meaning/1/Lee. Yes, I know a girl named Lee and obviously you know who I'm talking about. I don't really want to get to know her anymore though right now, sorry.

One of my roommates once told me that his family was related to the family tree of Cleopatra. I don't know if he sent me the sixty dollars that he owes me, but who cares it's only $60 that I left him in favors. I was mad as a college student, but as a growing business man in a field where anything can happen and I'm managing risk all the time, as long as I'm in it I'm happy and I'll be learning to make enough income to help out.

This field has a lot of free information which makes it very useful for other like-minded people. It's just that the person has got to be willing to take a shot in an inherently risky market or put some time into it to learn it. It is rewarding though once the trade has been mastered and things will be flowing smoothly. My mentor has told me that the average length of people becoming a good trader is about 2 years. He told me that I'm a little above average of a trader and that I've completed up to about 1 in a half years of knowledge starting from a new trader. I guess I'm born to think different which makes me lots of profit with little time spent and doing it in an ethical fashion.