I don't think there's really any cure for my problems with engaging in typical behavior where I just lose track of time and not get anything done that's very productive and meaningful. I guess life sometimes doesn't really feel that great being alone and having all that free time to yourself and not doing anything useful with it.
I think I do have an opportunity at work but it's only about eight hours where I get to focus and do what I'm starting to enjoy doing. I need to get used to the fact that I might have made mistakes and done things to screw myself over. It's like when I'm in that state of mind, I end up doing some reckless behavior that I don't really let anyone know about.
I'm going to have to learn to cope and move on with things that are just out of reach. I can do my best to limit the damage some people placed on me, but I guess those are just building steps for me.
Academy of Scrappy Credible Undergraduate Desire
