Reaching Strong Goals

I'm simplifying it again. My biggest weakness is getting carried away emotionally. I can be taken back by feeling negative emotions and then doing crazy stuff because of it. I don't look to drugs nor alcohol as an outlet, but mainly it seems like those feelings come from how I perceive myself in this physical world and from not having the desires that I want. It's practically an age old question that I never seriously tried to address for myself.

From making some progress these days, I have a primary church that I go to be fed the Word and to have great fellowship with everyone. I might join in a secondary church to just go socialize with doing some religious, Christian activity that nobody really wants to do like witnessing to people on the street and messing around with other believers and maybe pick up a beautiful and loving wife. I guess I can go for that then and I think it makes sense even though my reasons might offend some people at the secondary churches. What can I do really, I can't help it?

There's really nothing for me at the church with the former restraining order girl, except for faces that I want to seduce for my own glory! I'll be seriously messing around with them and act like I'm tossing things around and kicking stuff and pretending to be a drunkard who doesn't care about what's going on in the world. I'll probably start acting that way and yelling at the preacher there too. It sounds like a fun deal, just that I made a promise to them that I have to keep. In other words, I'm limiting myself to stalking them by focusing on a more important goal I have in mind.

I guess I have to start asking this question when I see a Korean girl who attends a church and I know that she's not really dating anyone or even if she is, I have to ask this question to myself and take my time with addressing it, "Can I single her out and be someone I can love for the rest of my life?" In other words, I need to ask myself if her inner qualities are attractive to me. I guess that will do a lot of filtering for me then in finding the right person. I try hard sometimes and I don't know how well I'm doing but looking back, yeah, I could have been pretty successful with landing a cute wife, even though I didn't know she was that good looking at the time.