Currently, I'm trying to make a living on the side with my day job with what I truly enjoy doing. At the moment, I'm just practicing to make myself a Poker Pro and swing trader. A third thing that I'm trying to get myself back into is being a software engineer. I've been on survival mode for too long while going to school to make myself one. I'm just trying to learn to relax before I keep on proceeding. I think what's helping me out is going to group meetings and being around others who are working on programming. This type of environment just feels nice for me and is pretty productive since we're all quiet for the most part.
I think it's just making the commitment to show up there and then flip open my laptop and start working on it. It's pretty much winning half the battle and it's like going to the scary gym for me sometimes. I've been doing it all wrong from feeling it should be all done out of necessity instead of feeling really happy about doing them. I'm trying to reprogram myself to be better now.
Another thing I feel out of necessity is editing my pictures and social media. It's something that I'm interested in doing just to put myself out there, and I know I'm not going to become viral because I really suck. I think it's funny though now that I think of it if people are going to make mean comments and even give me thumbs down on their reviews.
For the most part, I'm trying to do all of these things because it's fun and enjoyable for me. I'm slowly working at reprogramming my mind so I can be accessible to myself with doing these incredible things. I guess I can say that I suck and putting something out there just to pick on myself with good humor. I'm not so affected by negative outcomes as much anymore, even though some are always scary to worry about and worth avoiding.
