It looks like when I'm really in the mood then I can just naturally put off on other things which could turn out to be my own undoing. Something that's really cool is that I don't feel like I have this burden underneath me anymore. It might have been some psychological distress and I probably really was a candidate for getting some therapy of whatever kind, but I managed to put on a calm outer shell and keep it that well together even though I was screaming out underneath so many adolescent complaints right past my college years.
When I was out of college, it wasn't really any different and I wasn't changing at all. I guess problems really started kicking in then so I had to start digging deeper into my soul. I can see how everything was meant to happen for me. It was all about finding personal acceptance with everything that's going on. I would try to block out the bad and keep the good and it got so obsessive like this that it probably was way overboard at times. I even dealt with a bunch of crazy people and they kept on coming at me with so much confusion. I'm now laughing about it and accept those crazy people without any resentment and while constantly filtering out my anger because there's really no point in staying mad at a crazy person! I'm so convinced that they are and can even make a strong case already about it which they most likely don't want to hear anyway.
