The reason why I make this post is because I have been wrestling with the thought of placing a spouse above a relationship with God. I believe that all believers of the Word must make this journey of loving God before anything else. My real definition with this being solely devoted to a wife is to cast all my cares and concerns that belong in a marriage especially sex to the wife I have married and to not any other idol or person. The context of the Bible states to have sex only under the safety of marriage and not fornicate to protect our purity. More of my thoughts on this later.
I think it makes sense by being disciplined to a spouse, you are placing your primary devotion to the spouse without any other earthly thing interrupting the relationship. No one is perfect by all means, and we need to spend time with a spouse when apart for awhile. God also asks for a spot in our lives through meditating upon his Word. It's a simple thing with reading the Bible, just that not everyone does it enough. I myself have not really spent a lot of time building my faith through reading the Word. I do however study it as much as I can in my second Bible study service on Sundays.
The issue with sex is that I really struggled with piqued interest in the fifth grade for sexual maturity. I realized that a girl was really more special than deserving of being teased and taunted just as my other friends had done. Adding to this credit, it didn't help that I became ensnared with pornography. I really feel that my physiology became so aroused by the sight of pornography I lost control of it and ended up being dishonest by entering fake credit card numbers and passing through the account. I even disregarded the Deterrent page of "Must Be 18 to Enter." I don't think it was really quite enough to protect a struggling adolescent like me. I do know about filter systems nowadays that we could use to protect our children. I hope I can do a better job at leaving a greater impression of staying pure for marriage to my future children.
The thing that I'm realizing is that voyeurism of anything that may sexually pique our interest feeds our lustful temptations. This places us more near to enemy territory and may get us to discern some feelings of guilt and condemnation. I believe that God created our sexual energy for a beautiful purpose. Sex in itself is not a sin. The Bible states that for our happiness of expressing love for a husband and wife, we can enjoy this intimacy in a marriage. With the issue of pornography, I believe it cheats the person we are interested in or the spouse. It's because we are making porn an idol for getting sexually aroused and getting tempted to place it on par with the person we're in love with. "I don't know how this will make any woman feel, by her man having issues of being able to sexually confide only in her."
Another issue with pornography that I've been facing is that I feel a little worn out about getting married. It's been wearing out my natural feelings of being attracted to beautiful women. It's like my heart wants to condemn myself when natural feelings do arise for someone. It's an idol and not really a person. In effect, many feel that getting married to protect ourselves from porn will work. It's not the case because pornography is only used for piquing our sexual interest and not guiding ourselves to the person we want to make our wife. As a result, it causes these struggling feelings of viewing porn to still arise. There are many out there who face pornographic issues even after they marry. It's not to say that you won't be an exception. It's our physiological functions that have gone out of control and the only way to get back into being spiritually right is to learn to discipline ourselves.
I have learned that being turned on by a person is absolutely normal because God needs us to multiply. He also wants us to enjoy a creative expression of love in marriage with sex. It really helps out a lot with restoring our spiritual health in a fallen world. I believe that we don't need to make pornography a central focus in getting us aroused. We don't need it to remind ourselves that we are still in good physiological shape to have sex. Porn really interferes with what is supposed to be a natural feeling.
I believe that some men may feel that they can control themselves sexually by watching pornography. I don't think anyone would need porn to begin with if they didn't have any issue with having sex. Some men ignore fulfilling their wives' wishes of being sexually intimate with only the spouse. When porn is watched for sexual entertainment or for another purpose, it defeats the purpose of having a wife. It's because porn becomes like a standard and it's something you need to live up to the expectation of. Without experiencing a like experience, you can't be sexually happy. By humbling ourselves and letting go of porn, we will realize that there are so many blessings out there we can achieve. Therefore, repenting for the sake of Jesus gives us freedom to enjoy a more fulfilling and fuller life.
Academy of Scrappy Credible Undergraduate Desire
