It looks like I'm trying my best to stay focused and work hard at obtaining something but I just let myself naturally wander off into other things now. Thinking about it, I'm just recalling everything that made me happy or upset, no matter how small or great. It's quite peculiar because it's something that's just going on with my own brain chemistry at that moment of time. I'm realizing that I'm doing this a lot when I'm trying to listen to the Bible while driving around.
Thinking about it, it's probably because I don't understand the Bible that well and want to while listening to a format that isn't common English I'm accustomed to. It's like I have put in some effort to gather the details. I'm just naturally trying to listen to the words now and digest it fast as I can with the whole. I'm going after trying to do something impossible and this is going to be like my 10th attempt with going through the whole Bible. I'm already aware of some common stories I grew up with, but it's just trying to gather other details while also analyzing my personal faith. It makes sense for me to stay a believer after all! I'm also thinking about the gripes I have with another past church I used to attend. It was definitely a mistake to have associated with them, but what can you do? I want to now just test how much of a people-person I really am while visiting them for some time.
I think overall it's just gaining this personal stability and it looks like the Lord does recognize our unique strengths or talents in the Bible. It's when we are weak and when we least expect it that the Lord wants to make Himself shine brighter than any star and pour His love onto us!
