Getting the Hang of My Personality

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard.
4. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  
5. Read a book  
6. Buy a single family home. 
7. Finish my software engineering related courses.
8. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
9. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
10. Do some smart cooking.
11. Organize room more
12. Reactivate drone

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I don't think I'm really that smart but I guess I'm lucky to be capable enough from being persistent and having developed confidence. A lot of things that have annoyed me or bothered me in the past and still cause me to think about indulging in crazy fantasies like beating up my rude father is really from having perceived prolonged rude behavior and never saying anything about it. The build up has caused me to act out by mostly saying or texting things that get under people's skins. 

I had this problem because I was just too shy about bringing it up from feeling like I wouldn't be manly enough if I couldn't handle a little thing. I think it's a misperception for me now because I wasn't being manly from being a coward about bringing it up and lacking in confidence. 

I guess my way of being rude was saying things that people don't know where I'm coming from and still being mad about it. I just need to get better at communicating what's bothering me. 

Understanding Good Friends

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard.
4. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
5. Attempt to finish reading a book  
6. Buy a single family home. 
7. Finish my software engineering related courses.
8. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
9. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
10. Do some smart cooking.
11. Return a defective part for a much needed refund.

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I guess I've been dealing with some imposing friends. Maybe they just want to feel like they are making a difference to some guy who they feel can have a lot more going for him than themselves. This guy happens to me! 

What help they are trying to impose on me feels like they are forcing their way through and it's quite annoying! I never really ask them for help and don't really want it. It's crazy how having a good friend I admire to talk about certain topics like relationships has really been so good for me. She's totally making sense to me, and I'm vibing very well with her. I think I like her a lot as a person as well, so it helps. 

One of the annoying aspects about one of my imposing friends who is my close hangout buddy is that she will start asking if I want to be in a relationship and try to get me started on it. Gosh, it's like borderline rudeness there and I don't know if I'm really ever going to tell her that I feel this way with her doing that. I'm also trying to be nice to her, so it gets a little hard to tell her. 

Anyway, I don't even know if this is a dealbreaker with her doing that to me but a few other things about her behavior really irk me when it comes to considering a dating relationship with her personally. Just because people are in a dating relationship doesn't mean they are successful with what they are doing. I'm mostly rejecting what they think is best and they should be mindful about it. 

I think the criteria I used to pick my friend to talk about relationships is really turning out to make a lot of sense. She has the qualities I look for in a person and it doesn't matter if they are in a relationship or not. She has a unique predicament for me in how she enjoys staying as a single mother and she has hit on me quite a few times but I didn't fall for it because not being with a single mom is a preference for me, so it's a deal breaker but she does have enough qualities I look for. 

Focusing on Priorities

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard.
4. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
5. Attempt to finish reading a book  
6. Buy a single family home. 
7. Finish my software engineering related courses.
8. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
9. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
10. Do some smart cooking.
11. Return a defective part for a much needed refund.

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It looks like it's really about focusing on the most important things for me and just riding out any form of stress by putting a literal smile on my face. It's really coming down to being patient and just getting things done in a timely manner. 

I don't think I really need to focus so much on watching TV anymore and just get done with what I should be doing to reach some goals. Seriously, I think putting an easy smile on my face is just a great way to maintain a level of good confidence when anything is feeling uneasy for me. At the same time, I don't know what it is yet but listening to Scriptures has also been very helpful for me. 

It looks like because I like to stay pretty chill, I pretty much get this frozen-in-motion syndrome often when I'm feeling stressed. I just feel like from work piling up and not knowing how to go about it. I sort of lack this bird's eye point-of-view and just need to be organized better by breaking it down.  

Understanding What Transpired in the Past

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Return a defective part for a much needed refund.

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With me being a very confident person now, I believe that I have come to know my personal intentions very well. I don't really care if people disagree with me or not. I'm not really going to argue in some cases. For the most part, I just want to practice maintaining basic chemistry with all of my female friends. I have yet to maintain being friends with someone who doesn't have any deal breakers and is single! 

An interesting friendship that I have going is that there is a single mom who has enough qualities I look for in a woman, plus when she cleans up on her good days, she can be almost too pretty for me to date. She has only one deal breaker for me which is how she's a mom. It's a deal breaker for me because it's just a preference. 

I'm going to be truthful and reveal that I think having physical preferences is too dumb and shallow! It really shouldn't matter in my opinion because we are all going to be too old to date or something could take us out of commission and would be nice then to have a partner who sees us for more than just looks or requires both. It's a quality to be able to find your partner still attractive even if he or she no longer has the looks from being too old, sick, or even fat which will be inevitable for everyone. 

For a close friend I know, she is going to only worry about it when she gets there, so she will keep on struggling with this and she has already been in many relationships! She thinks being together for a year is already a long time, but I think it's still a short run when you look at it from the bigger picture of how you lived your life. She has some character issues and ironically, I call her a soulmate! However, she's a soulmate who has deal breakers so I won't ever be getting with her as long as I can feel this way about her. It's crazy because by completing only a few moves, I could have been married to her and committed to being in a loving relationship and then probably succeed at maintaining a healthy marriage! 

Living the Dream Career

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Return a defective part for a much needed refund.

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I am a rather rare trader from choosing to participate with the intention of profiting off the Forex market. I am doing a lot better with it now. I have future plans laid out for me in making a ton of money without really having to work that hard except being at a computer which comes naturally to me and might be a lot harder than it actually seems to some! I'm ready to be like "Come to Papa" mode.

On a random note, I really don't mind marrying and having a partner who doesn't fit the looks category of what I was looking for in the first place anymore. I find myself still capable of being physically attracted to these other types of women. In fact, I don't think I even have that much of a preference with it anymore. I'm just looking for great qualities and no deal breakers. 

I'm going to play it safe and work hard for my money and then get courageous about trading and investing to make myself rich on the side! I'm going to stick to being a software engineer because I am a natural grinder and don't mind all the pain and personal abuse I feel with it. 

Where I'm Going With This

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Return a defective part for a much needed refund.

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It's funny that I had a lot of minor issues that I fostered as personal drama for a while and was still open to listening and being chill with others because of maintaining some good qualities. From the stress and lacking a lot of confidence, it turns out that it's really simple to fix by just putting a smile on your face and then putting in the hard work by just doing it! 

Now whenever I get a chance to talk to any lady around my range who I can confidently date, I want to practice applying basic chemistry with them. It doesn't matter anymore if I spot any deal breakers, I want to keep on smiling and getting used to the basics. This is something I'm going to do starting with a close hangout buddy who wasn't really the greatest woman in the world for me to associate with while going on a few first dates. I've already come to accept her deal breakers! 

Finding Right Thing to Focus On

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Return a defective part for a much needed refund.

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Analyzing what I did yesterday, a lot of it was centered on entertainment. I guess it's okay but it should be done for the right reasons. I think I can really let it go for doing more important things.

I think I need to continue to do my very best while working hard at it and maintaining a high level of self-confidence. 

I have figured out that I want to make my money as an investor and just have a lot of free time. Anything stress-related for whatever unknowns that are coming before me is something that I can face with a smile! 

Figuring Me Out

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home.   
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Return a defective part for a much needed refund.

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A key step for me has really been developing self confidence. There's really no way other than for me to now use this and work very hard to get to what I'm looking for in life. 

Well, there's a thing I plan to do on a close hangout buddy who is a younger woman! Even though I'm not interested in dating her at the moment, I have been focusing on practicing some basic chemistry with her at a consistent rate. It sometimes feels boring to just talk to her, but I still have a smile on my face and let out some positive enthusiasm! 

I want to turn this into a habit so that I can have a better chance of success whenever I can be blessed with some more exciting dates. Even if I'm undesirable while my preferences are getting looser, I'm going to be happy wherever I'm at. I won't ever tell my buddy I'm doing this for my own benefit! I guess she can just suspect it or never realize it while trying to ask about what's wrong with me sometimes. 

Theorizing My Past Stupid Actions

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.

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Because I'm so confident with myself, I really don't care about people making wild accusations with me anymore. Neither do I really care about calling myself all sorts of negative names anymore. My upbeat confidence still remains the same- unbridled! 

I think with me going all ape crazy on annoying and pervertedly weird colleagues while being like the nicest guy in the world that I could be at the same time, it was just a personal ploy to deal with my lack of self-confidence. I was really just throwing my weight around like a maniac and then in a timidly weird way sometimes just to compensate for my lack of self-confidence. I even texted people my complaints that threw them off and made them turn into wet sour peaches that could be left alone to allow them to dry out every last drop of its bitter tears because of my lack of self-confidence and not being able to approach them in person about it! 

With me acting the way I did and having only a few good girls pursuing me at the time, I totally regret not marrying one of them. It's because of my lack of self-confidence. I blame it all on not being able to man up at the time. Not anymore and the love of Christ should compel you to do the same- being the good preacher who is also walking his holy talk!  

Understanding Romantic Side of Me

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.

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I think with my confidence having been stifled in the past but now broken free to be clean of any lingering personal insecurities, it's a total game changer for me along with my undying faith in the Lord. When the going gets tough with anything you are trying to do, just cling to absolute self confidence while working harder! My faith in Jesus is really what's causing me to stay here while constantly feeling this radical change take place within my heart. 

I realize that with a close hangout buddy, we really could have done something close to hooking up by now if things were a little different. It's still not probable at the moment because now I realize she has a major deal breaker for me that she could fix over time from working on herself with a therapist. She's also in a relationship with someone else right now she truly adores and cares about. I'm secretly not really into her being with that person because it's related to my own personal beliefs which I don't think I ever need to share with her. I do care a lot about her personal happiness, and I'm not going to be persistent about being together. I actually don't mind all of her faults and how she appears anytime anymore but a couple things about her behavior is something that is really a deal breaker for me and she can still work on it. 

With her having thought of me originally as like a brother, I see it as because I wasn't establishing enough chemistry with her. This theory makes sense because I subconsciously spotted a deal breaker but was making the effort to still be friendly with her. 

It wasn't really that smooth sailing and always messed me up on my first dates until I went out with the right lady and she politely turned me down. However, she seems to have allowed a small opening for us to see each other again. This has become the turning point for me in understanding my romantic relationships. 

I never really put that much thought into all the reasons why I'm frustrated while using my own natural talent of coming to happy conclusions about myself. I was just dwelling on my negative emotions and complaining secretly why things had to be this way. 

The way I managed to get out of this is from eventually developing true confidence and working harder. I also see myself as a natural at being able to understand myself from a therapist's point of view since I'm managing to always stay truly happy and confident with myself. I also know now that I don't ever want to talk about my dating goals with certain friends because they are annoying me and how I prefer discussing it with a certain inner crowd instead. This annoyance comes from thinking it's a waste of time talking about it with them while feeling like I'm not interested in what they have to offer me. These friends can also work on developing qualities I admire, which may change my mind over time of course so that I'll be happy to open up about my dating life but this is something I'm not going to openly remind them about. 

Personal Preferences

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Take some time to finish up voting on mail-in ballots
14. Pack for trip. 

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I finally understand my personal preferences. I prefer talking about dating with only a few friends but I am initially open to talking about it with anyone new until I get to know them well enough to personally decide if I'm still interested. The people I love listening to about dating are practically the experts who I personally know and have successfully dated the type of person I'm interested in. Just because one of my close friends said she's dated a lot of people, I still find it to be awkward and uninteresting for me to talk about it with her. She's very interested in talking about it, but I'm not into her so I just don't want to waste my time engaging in this type of conversation. It makes sense then that I haven't been practicing enough of that good amount of chemistry with her and turned into some type of bad habit, so I think it's had an effect on my own dating life. I think because of my actions and not conveying my lack of interest in dating her, she can even think that I'm like a brother to her which isn't the case for me. I just see her as a friend and since she's a girl who has the appearance of someone within my range, I find that she has a few deal breakers at the moment which she can fix but I'm never counting on it so with my preferences, not interested! 

I think trying to maintain romantic chemistry is very important in general with any single lady who wants to connect with me. It's pretty boring for me sometimes, but I'm willing to always grind it out with a smile on my face despite not being in the mood for participating sometimes. Honestly, looks don't really matter to me anymore so I've grown to become someone else in a good way. 

Understanding Why I Became So Bothered

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Take some time to finish up voting on mail-in ballots
14. Pack for trip. 

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I think a lot of this whole being bothered thing really became worse because I was lacking in so much self-confidence and building up a lot of frustration. I have always been committed to not gunning down anybody who I think seriously wronged me because it was always silly to me and there was something deeper that I was having trouble tapping into. 

I managed to figure it out. It's because it was such an introverted thing to focus on my emotions and it was stressful to figure out while lacking in self-confidence to really motivate myself to naturally understand myself. It wasn't easy but I just think putting my faith in the Lord from reading and hearing some Scriptures really comforted me. I was already a believer to begin with, so I think it contributed to me gaining a lot of confidence that I always wanted for myself in this world but never could obtain. 

What I Need to Work On

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Take some time to finish up voting on mail-in ballots
14. Pack for trip. 
15. Car wash
16. Haircut

I'm really trying to make money right now on the side by doing something ingenious and unconventional. What I am noticing is that there may be better opportunities for me if I stay up a little past my bedtime and manage some trades. It could be that maybe this is the final piece I need to complete my system. 

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I'm really hoping to continue working on everything with myself. The latest thing I'm interested in is developing some romantic chemistry while just doing it for practice right now of course with my close friend. She's pretty oblivious about it, and I think it's better that I never reveal it to her in person because it could ruin the work I already put into it by changing her mood. Also, it's probably something that I never need to bring up because I'm not interested in her from having a few deal breakers which I implied with her. I don't mind telling her really if she wants to ever directly ask me if I like her or not in that way. 

Overall, she seems to be enjoying hanging out with me so far. This practice I'm doing with her is also not something I'm enforcing with myself. I just don't really care about impressing her at this point in our relationship. 

Pushing Forward With Better Time Management

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Take some time to finish up voting on mail-in ballots
14. Pack for trip. 
15. Car wash
16. Haircut

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I think it's better to just exercise discipline with letting the mind stay focused and practicing things that are better suited for time management. It seems like I just mean well, but I'm just slow to finish because my mind likes to wander off a lot. 

Now I see two more flaws my close friend has. She can work on accepting some things better besides complaining and admitting that she's being weird sometimes. She does have a pretty bad case of anger issues and even though she's toned up quite a bit, it's still pretty existent and she has been working with a therapist. 

I really am understanding my emotions better. This is all introverted, and I don't really have to share them with anyone if it doesn't really pertain to them. The focus should be on better things sometimes, and this is what my close friend also has a problem with too. 

My close friend has things she could still fix about herself, as she comes to the knowledge of them slowly but until then, these are deal breakers for me when it comes to wanting to date her. I'm only indirectly using her for practicing romantic chemistry. It feels pretty boring with her but I just want to get used to it, so it will be there when I'm finally going out with the right person. 

What I'm Realizing

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Take some time to finish up voting on mail-in ballots
14. Pack for trip. 
15. Car wash
16. Haircut

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I am mentally in a lot better shape than I was years ago, and it seems like it only keeps on getting better for me like how wine gets finer as it ages. It's thanks a lot to this self-confidence that I've been blessed to finally receive and want to wholeheartedly give credit to the Lord! 

I could have returned meanness from others who said they were only helping with snappy behavior and then get away with it while messing with their confidence levels thanks to my personality being able to catch and remember their hypocritical behaviors. I decided not to go forward with it because I didn't want to feel like a meanie anymore and was too tired of being that way occasionally. It just left me feeling depressed and guilty while building up so much compassion oddly for my dumb foes! I was tired of acting like an eccentric person who acted so tough and probably was but could never finish strong from being a procrastinator and sometimes chronically fatigued from the build up of stress while lacking patience and having very high expectations. 

I think I can be hard nosed and even more stubborn while demeaning all I want to be in a cool manner that I like while always sounding a lot nicer in tone than I'm normally accustomed to with yelling freely. I can be mad all I want to be and say the meanest honest things without wavering in confidence by just sounding nicer! I can even be more effective with people who I am mutually angry with and saying whatever I want by just sounding more polite! 

Making Some Sense With What I Have

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Take some time to finish up voting on mail-in ballots

---

Okay, it's pretty clear to me that one of my close female friends really likes me. I'm also her main guy friend that she likes to prioritize hanging out with. Other than that, she likes to be with her family.

She has mentioned to me before that if I wasn't a nice person then she would have cut me off already a long time ago. She has also been seeing a therapist and I'm starting to see a little improvement with how she carries herself when I do stuff to tick her off!  

It's mainly been about communication over stuff we like and I'm realizing this is really the crust of having chemistry in relationships. It can feel boring for me, but I think it's necessary for me to build upon if I want to have female relationships and especially a lover so I see it as practice with her. I'm not into this friend even though she's enough for me on the outer appearances. I don't really care about it that much and besides, there are other different looking girls who I also like about their appearances too. It's just that, it's not enough for me anymore when it comes to finding myself a wife. 

Holding Things Up Better

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Discuss plans next day with friend about upcoming trip
14. Take some time to finish up voting on mail-in ballots
15. Go to walmart to return item and buy any needed items (e.g. honey,vicks)
16. Test out new drone
17. Buy batteries for piano and practice my two songs
18. Wash car

I think I'm just naturally meant to be a busy man and have so many things that I want to do on a daily basis while never being able to get to all of it. Therefore, I have to prioritize my time to be more effective besides just never completing anything. I do like to complete one or two tasks before just calling it a day though, so I think I need to just push myself a little more on a daily basis so that I can feel more satisfied and then go have fun with something which is the best part of my day!

---

I think my faith in Jesus isn't going to be leaving me anytime soon. I think from listening to Scriptures on a daily basis and trying to understand its contents is actually helping me better now. 

Also, I'm learning that I don't want to reject any appearances with ladies in general. I want to treat them all equally and really only weigh them upon qualities which I'm looking for. There is such a thing for me with a girl being a little too pretty or a little too ugly. I'm going to probably always be a little nervous about it if she's the one and has that type of appearance, but I'm still willing to keep manning up about it! I think it's just a quality of mine.  

Revisiting Goals

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Attempt to finish reading a book  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Discuss plans next day with friend about upcoming trip
14. Take some time to finish up voting on mail-in ballots
15. Go to walmart to return item and buy any needed items (e.g. honey,vicks)
16. Test out new drone
17. Buy batteries for piano and practice my two songs
18. Wash car

I'm looking at these objectives on a daily basis but I keep failing to complete all of them. I think I am able to maybe knock out only one before calling it a day! This is something I would like to fix. 

I think it's mainly because my mind is pretty boggled down with the ridiculousness of doing it with the time given to me and then wanting to do something less productive to pass the time. I think I just have to accept with a smile on my face that it's better to do what I have in mind of doing besides feeling like I'm indirectly escaping into someone else's world by watching television. I mean if I have time afterwards then maybe I should go reward myself.

I'm going to just break it down into smaller and manageable steps that are satisfying for me to complete at the bare minimum because I sort of want to be in more control of my tasks and feel a lot more fulfillment. 

It looks like it's a lot easier for me to do things with people because I prefer this way besides being on my own. It's a lot harder for me to execute it on my own because then I want to always give into less productive but fun things to waste my time without realizing it. 

A life coach has tried to sell me on mentoring me, but I'm just not into it. 

The life coach can't even always be there to be of any help to me. Plus, I don't really want to pay him anything to be coached. Maybe he has a better way of doing it if he gets to be successful at something like Real Estate or business and then make an offer to mentor someone for free he sees fit. He then doesn't have to worry about paying for some bills! 

Trading Better

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Finish reading a novel  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets
14. Finish voting on mail-in ballots
15. Go to walmart to return item and buy some needed items
16. Test out new drone

In order for me to trade a lot better, I'm really going to need to stay up. I'm having trouble doing this because I'm just knocking out. I think I just need to remind myself that I'm doing this for possibly easy money! I'm going back to my trading routine that was successful for me two months ago. 

I completely went off with trading and it derailed me this month. Fortunately, all is not lost and the amount I lost is something I am willing to stomach for this. It's interesting how comparing it to trading and Poker, I get more butt hurt about losing a few dollars in a game of Poker rather than losing hundreds of dollars in trading. This leads me to conclude that I have always been meant to be a trader, and I even have a passion for it while loving this swing trading approach I am still developing. 

Making End's Meet Properly

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Finish reading a novel  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets
14. Finish voting on mail-in ballots

Honestly, I would really like to find myself an exciting girlfriend who's ready to be my wife! I think it would then make my life a lot more fun even though it's already manageable with what I have going on. Deep down inside I believe that I can live a single man's life happily while achieving all the goals that I ever wanted for myself and live a full life. I can also find myself hanging out with different types of crowd easily. I now have all the confidence that I could ever want underneath for myself. 

---

I think a big trick that I'm learning for myself is to just put on a smile while I'm facing some type of adversity which feels sort of negative and then move in while focusing on what I intended to do. 

For one of the qualities that I have, I can mesh well with just about any personality type if I wanted to. We can totally be in disagreement with a lot of things, but I can still call them friends. For a close friend, our personalities might work really well together like we could even be ideal romantic partners if we were both interested but she's still lacking in a few qualities I look for. It makes sense in that she already admitted to liking me a lot and mentioned that I have the right personality for her. She even has been able to convince her closest friends to want to go on a date with me! 

To make matters worse, she ended up saying that I'm like a brother to her which greatly angered me so it was an offensive remark to me and even a soulmate said the same thing to me! This really drove me so crazy for a while underneath but now I understand that it's still offensive to me because I only have one little sister who should be able to call me an actual brother, and I see her as a very special family member. However, I can understand being called a spiritual sibling through my faith which is what even practicing spouses can say to each other! Also, I'm never interested in talking to them about dating while thinking it's a waste of time from already seeing neither of them as a good girlfriend for me. It always made me think about it because they still like to sometimes bring it up about me finding other women to date.

Besides this frustration with those close friends, I do have another friend who I see as having enough qualities for me to want to date but has a deal breaker from being a single mom. Another guy friend I know only wants to date these women, so I guess it can sometimes also really be about what our preferences are. If this single mom I'm friends with called me a brother, then I think I can let it slide more easily from staying interested to talk about why she isn't interested in me and just accept it. It's still possible that I might change my mind about her later on though and go back to becoming frustrated with her if she ever did! However, she has been complimenting me as of late, which is so nice of her.  

I never really practiced enough personal reflection of why some things just tick me off so much.

Maybe it's because it's a highly introverted thing, and I'm not so much of an introvert. I prefer being extroverted. From writing to putting up posts on here, it's like a trade off with doing something introverted and then sharing it anonymously on here for any random person to read! This then makes it an extroverted thing for me, so all these introverted posts I've been doing is really me making an extroverted expression of just letting out anything boggling me because I'm already confident to know doing this is always enough and healthy for me without having to pay for any therapist. It's so brilliant, I know!  

Ranting About Online Poker

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Finish reading a novel  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets
14. Finish voting on mail-in ballots

---

Especially with this Poker game I'm playing, it feels like I can be outdrawn while holding the better starting hand and then beaten by a slightly better hand on another one at any time. It's mainly a game of patience while taking advantage of both luck and skill. It's starting to drive me a bit crazy because I am starting to feel some gambler's remorse from playing this game. I think I'm going to just sit out until I really have the luxury of being able to play it without really caring what happens to the money I put into it and being mainly just for fun. I guess in the end I really can't afford to lose a little money in this game and then keep myself going. I just don't have the passion for it like I used to anymore. 

Talking About Relationships

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Finish reading a novel  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets
14. Finish voting on mail-in ballots
15. Buy an acceptable mini drone for travel.

---

I have been learning a lot about myself and it looks like a close female friend is not someone I want to ever be in a dating relationship with just because she has a personality trait which is a deal breaker. It's something she can fix on her own but I'm not going to hold her to it while pursuing her. It's just not in my personal preference to do something like it. 

Also for a soulmate of mine, she also has a couple deal breakers, too! I definitely am not pursuing her even though I still call her a soulmate- what an oxymoron! I'm not even going to mention her as a soulmate anymore to others because they are going to see me as crazy! It's a quality of mine that allows me to see her as one! I'm practically the committing type, so it's something I can never take back! 

So a close friend and a soulmate have deal breakers that I don't ever want to date them. It's a big deal, isn't it? I'm just happy I finally understand why I am not fond of hearing any opinions they have to say about me finding another girl to be with besides them. I practically don't care and am not interested while it annoys me a lot when they bring it up because I see it as a waste of time to talk about with them! 

I have been implying things in a kinder tone to my close friend about why I'm not into her. She can also be such a sensitive brat sometimes even though she says she's a nice person. I don't think so because she has some anger or anxiety issues that she can't always keep to herself. I honestly think that a nice person won't ever mention that he or she is a nice person to begin with. I just tell someone that I will be nice to them even though I've heard feedback from others that I am a nice guy in general. 

I'm going to have to tell my close friend that she shouldn't ever have to say she's a nice person because she doesn't need to and this isn't what a nice person really does. Others will already say it for her, if she's consistent enough with being nice. I think I know my stuff here because I was voted as the nicest guy in my elementary school. Also, I've had a coworker who works as a teacher tell me in person that I'm the nicest guy in the world. Even someone helping me find dates says that the ladies I dated told her that they think I'm a nice guy!

I think she might have some self-confidence issues from not always thinking straight due to her physical ailment. She says that it's not always good to be honest, but I think that's only because she could be wearing her heart on her sleeve and feels worried about regretting having said something later. This isn't really being honest then because it's not already the ideal truth she meant to point out. 

I'm actually very confident in myself now so I can debate up a storm if any disagreements happen when I'm being honest. It's pretty annoying that my close friend only wants to argue that I'm being rude to her by sounding demeaning, which is pointless. I think I have to be nice to her because pointing out that she's sensitive is going to still drive her crazy! I even told her that I want to work on being nice to her when she says stuff sometimes that I think deserves to be shot down. I think I'll have to tell her that the way she's acting sometimes isn't really nice at all. 

Personal Biggest Trick for Accomplishing Things

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.
2. Work on staying concentrated and finishing in a timely manner.   
3. Handle an important task at work.   
4. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.
5. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 
6. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.
7. Finish reading a novel  
8. Buy a single family home. 
9. Finish my software engineering related courses.
10. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.
11. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 
12. Do some smart cooking.
13. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets
14. Finish voting on mail-in ballots
15. Buy an acceptable mini drone for travel.
    

It looks like this list is turning out to be a very helpful way to organize my daily thoughts during the week. I'm only boldening the parts that I think I can accomplish for the time being. 

---

Something new that I have learned not too long ago is to basically force a genuine smile on your face whenever anything negative for whatever reason comes your way. Thinking about how short I am compared to other tall people, I'm putting a smile on my face right now. 

It looks like I stopped caring to be honest and I'm just not meant to be a special and talented kid who goes on to be an NBA star while feeling the rush of dunking for millions of dollars! It's worth putting on that smile when things feel a little rough for yourself appropriately. 

Next step is to just put in the hard work for whatever you are trying to accomplish. It's really that simple. 

Best Tip in Times of Feeling Worse

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.  

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

14. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets

15. Finish voting on mail-in ballots

---

Whenever I find myself in any situation where I just feel like I'm in a rut, I just naturally put on a smile to keep myself going. I don't want to constantly have a smile on my face or start overdoing it in a sense where it will tick off the whole world because they are going to think I'm laughing at them or something. This is how my parents felt, so yeah they are also weird people! 

Personal Confidence at Its Peak

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.  

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

14. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets

15. Finish voting on mail-in ballots

---

It's crazy in that my natural personality is actually rooted in having an unusually high amount of self-confidence. I'm not even that bothered by criticism. I actually look at it as something I could really try to improve myself upon besides letting it mess with my personal happiness. 

I really think it's funny to be made fun of for whatever reason now. I really don't care about being looked down upon nor misunderstood anymore. I just plain don't care how people see me. 

The interesting part about all of this though is that I like to be a nice person in general. I don't even claim that I'm nice. I just say that I'm going to be nice to someone now. 

Making Money With Patience

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Stay up a little later at night to manage trades.  

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

14. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets

15. Finish voting on mail-in ballots

I am starting to read more but I still have to be vigilant about washing up before bed. 

---

I have decided to make trading Forex masterfully my principal method with earning a high income. 

If I become successful at this then it will afford my preferred cost of living and valuable time to enjoy doing other passion projects, have favorable relationships, and promote an optimal lifestyle. 

I need a backup plan with making money so I will improve upon my software making skills by picking software engineering as my own craft. 

What It Looks Like

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

14. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets

15. Finish voting on mail-in ballots

---

I'm planning to focus on mastering the Forex market as a swing trader. It looks like this delicate art of making money as just another little guy in the market is becoming more relevant for me. What I have set up now is just the Daily and 4-hour charts. It looks like having triple confirmation on both charts is what's required for me to have a decent entry. However, I'm finding that the London opening might be a great time to make a more loose ended trade. It depends on if I can stay up that late to work on this trade; otherwise, I can just sit it out. 

Understanding Something Different

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

14. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets

---

Right now, I'm realizing that my soulmate is someone I don't ever want to marry at this moment in time. She won't ever be good enough for me.

It really did bother me when she brought up any comments that could be related to dating and implying some form of negative marks towards me about it. I never said these things to her and am mindful about never bringing it up because it's rude to me. The reason that I spent my time with her was not because I liked her as someone I would date, but because it's just a quality of mine that enables me.  

I was just confused about it for quite some time. I think I still really care about her. 

Now that I'm very confident in myself, I have realized the truth that was underneath my nose all this time!

Getting Things Done

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products.

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

14. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets

Playing with the new drone has been a lot of fun. I can't wait to fire it up when I get back home to see what footage I can catch. 

---

I've made some adjustments with my trading analysis but it's to mainly limit losses as much as possible while putting myself in good opportunities to make some money. For the most part, my core system remains intact with a couple more helpful indicators that I've decided to employ. It's pretty wild that I could see myself making a lot through Forex in a timely manner! 

Today, I really need to pack up things at the last minute to get ready for tomorrow. I'm really looking forward to my trip. 

Working on Things

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. 

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

14. Get car registration settled

15. Prepare for trips. Create and use a checklist. Buy tickets

For #3, I think my main form of making money is going to be from trading the Forex market for the short term. I'm analyzing my trades and trying to make proper decisions while limiting losses and going for big gains. It's a work in progress, but it's getting there for me. I have a trading system that's basically catering to my own style. 

Right now, I have decided to make the Daily chart my determining factor along with the 4-hour chart being my signal confirmation. I have noticed that pairing these two charts have given me biggest gains most reliably. I'm setting my stop loss at around the weekly high or low, so I'm not getting shut out that easily with plenty of time to exit for a smaller loss when there's a possible trade reversal. 

I'm still making money with my biggest asset at the moment. Eventually, I will be playing much more conservatively with bonds, stocks, and options. 

I really ought to also get #14 out of the way before the month is over. 

---

My confidence level is soaring so high that I feel great and not really disappointed about anything with myself. I'm okay with continuously working on something and going for reaching a target. 

Withholding This Thought in Conversation

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. 

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Research for future trips. Buy tickets and book an Airbnb. (After paycheck)

14. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

15. Get car registration settled (After paycheck)

16. Buy a close friend a birthday present (After paycheck)

17. Prepare for trips. Create and use checklist

----

Since this is an anonymous blog, I feel like I can just let any crazy thoughts crash onto this site. I have become 100% confident about myself and feel great emotionally, physically, and mentally. It's something that I think everyone can achieve but they have to work for it. 

With the soulmate who won't count as one to others except to me and again, this is because I'm letting myself stay crazy here permanently while acknowledging that almost everyone will disagree with me, I think she's settling with her current boyfriend because he's only good looking enough for her! I also think her boyfriend can do better than her. 

This is really none of my business to say anything about my personal opinion with their relationship in their social circle. If they are happy from being able to still work it out, then great for them! 

Plus, I'm not interested in being with this soulmate anyway so it doesn't matter who she's with as long as she's happy. 

It took me a while to realize why I was mad at her. I thought she was being dishonest with me about her relationship initially with this new boyfriend and was moody and was acting like such a train wreck while constantly spending a lot of time with her. 

Deep down, I know that she really loves me still since she already told me in person privately a while ago so it doesn't hurt to claim that she still does! Sadly, I'm not into her because she doesn't have enough qualities I look for in a partner and also has a little too many breakups with several exes and a couple nasty divorces to go with it even though she tried her best to minimize some personal damages.

One of it wasn't her fault from being cheated on and for the other, she ended up bailing on an ex-husband she fell in love with and was treating her so badly verbally and psychologically. In some of her defense though, he wasn't interested in going to couples therapy.

She felt that turning into a mean and cranky lady would get her some results and became sort of accustomed to it. I guess it's because it worked on her mean ex-husband who begged her on his knees to sign some papers to receive some settlement money. She felt some power or maybe just had a life changing moment with becoming more impatient and then had plenty of moody situations that weren't fun for me to be around. 

I'm going to withhold talking about my feelings with her current relationship to others in person. I'm just going to be rather quiet about it, but I did write how I felt about it in this post briefly. If she's still together with him, then she must be doing something right or this could be how well-experienced she is at maintaining a long term relationship. I think she holds back on letting out some angry thoughts, so I can tell it will then be a little struggle with this boyfriend of hers who is good-looking to her but might have a few key relationship differences so she must still think it's worthwhile to work for it and keep that cute infatuation alive with him as long as she can. She has blatantly revealed several times that she values physical attraction the most at this stage of her life. I think it's a slippery slope for my own preferences because there can be some shallowness attached to it but it's her own happiness to pursue. People might argue in favor of this but I think it's mainly about what feels good and right to them. It's their right to feel this way, but if they don't want to accept how I see it while putting up a strong emotional reaction then I think they could go see a therapist about it. Overall, it's a strong emotion that's being put to the test without them being perfect themselves. Therefore, I don't feel bad for myself nor her anyway now. 

After all, this slightly bad friend I'm taking a break from is still a soulmate I can reconnect with whenever I'm ready even though I'll never want to be her life partner afterwards! It will suck to talk about dating with her, so I don't want to ever get into that. I already have other women I prefer talking about it with. This feeling of sadness while talking about dating is also the same with a close friend I'm not into but she currently does have the greatest potential to be my desirable partner. She can definitely work on it, and I guess she does have enough interest in improving herself to put in some effort. It's also another quality I admire! 

Personal Discussion About Soulmate Seeing a Therapist

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. 

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Research for future trips. Buy tickets and book an Airbnb. (After paycheck)

14. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

15. Get car registration settled (After paycheck)

16. Buy a close friend a birthday present (After paycheck)

17. Prepare for trips. Create and use checklist

Having a good buddy to go on long trips with has been a lot of fun. I do enjoy getting along with her, and she is the closest out of all my current female friends who I can see myself in a romantic relationship with. It's just that I'm not convinced that she has gained enough qualities I'm looking for so I'm not interested at all. It still feels sad for me to talk about dating others with her. I think she really does like me like she said in person so she's actually comfortable. She has put on some protective front that was annoying at first, but she sort of has her guard down with me after I agreed to make some positive changes on her. 

Being able to put preferences on good looks aside and still be heavily attracted to someone is another great quality in itself. My close friend is really within range of having desirable looks I like. It really doesn't matter to me to be honest, so most women fall into this category from not being that picky. It's maybe if she's too pretty or too ugly that I might have a personal objection. 

I have realized this from going on a date with someone on the lower end and someone more on the normal end. My close friend fluctuates from being on the lower to higher end, which is probably based on my physical mood and also her efforts while I am always around her. I actually take care of my hygiene and good appearance while considering when I'll be hanging out with her. She might fall into the category of most ladies that I'm totally fine with. 

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I'm starting to understand how a soulmate is someone I won't ever be referring to as one with my future dates. It's a crazy acceptance thing that I have going on and she will technically not count as one if I explain it to them, so I'll just avoid this complication by not approaching it like that anymore. I don't think I will ever do this again with anyone. It's just on this blog alone for all the anonymous readers as well to get confused by me and not be able to do anything about it!

I totally ticked off my last few dates and they were great! I just wasn't clicking with what I was supposed to do. I think it just took going on a date with the right one to be able to think about all these things better and start putting it together. It just puts things into perspective after going through periods with self-doubt and lacking some confidence. Contrary to what a close friend says that you have to date around to gain experience, I only needed one good date to start understanding what it takes! 

With the soulmate I'm not talking to right now, she was just giving away too much information about her dating preferences while being moody and complaining about not getting what she thinks she deserves around us. It felt like she was ridiculing us because we didn't fully have what she expects in a romantic partner. She's also a mess and an undesirable train wreck in my point of view!  

The way she was acting sometimes while constantly being around her felt really ill-mannered and was driving me crazy so I ended up making fun of her with a rude text message. She didn't take so kindly to it, so I personally think she should go see a therapist. I have been actually enjoying spending my time while being apart from her. According to my close friend, I did something that was demeaning to her but she doesn't know when she is saying degrading things to me, but I just ignore them because I don't care. 

The way I see it is that they both talk behind people's backs in a negative manner to vent, and they are not being that kind about the subject while doing this. They are doing something far worse than I am doing to make them feel shame in person via text because I am outraged by what they said or did. I am saving them the trouble of me yelling at them and going bonkers! They both have been seeing therapists and I think the soulmate could go see one again and work on persevering better, along with managing her mood swings better!

Trading Forex Better

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. 

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Research for future trips. Buy tickets and book an Airbnb. (After paycheck)

14. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

15. Get car registration settled (After paycheck)

16. Buy a close friend a birthday present (After paycheck)

17. Prepare for trips. Create and use checklist

To achieve #3, I think it's more of a timely thing while constantly making proper adjustments. It's basically about being on top in the end and it's starting to make sense with what I have going. The biggest change for me is going to be trading at night before I go to sleep. It totally makes sense now for me with my own reasoning and preferences.

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I'm finding out that in the Forex market, it's probably better to exit trades on Friday if you don't have that much of a good position. It's because there's a lot of uncertainty with the market closing out that day and firing back up after a day of rest. Anything can really drive the price and I don't really know what's going to happen, so it would be better to just avoid it. 

Managing trades around the clock when it's open makes a ton of sense because it's going on a continuous 24 hour loop. With different market sessions opening up daily, it makes sense to take a glimpse around each of these times for entering and exiting positions. 

I have thought about tightening my stop loss once I have good profit but I'm figuring that it's okay to leave the original stop loss there from having decent faith in my system because the payoff will be better. On a Friday, if the position is good then I see this as the appropriate time to tighten the stop loss to break even. I'm doing a swing trading approach, so this will be different for other traders to cater to our different ideas.  

My method is now utilizing the monthly, daily, and 4 hour charts. My base is the 4 hour and the other two determine if I take a good signal. 

Creating Personal Rules of Engagement

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. 

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Research for future trips. Buy tickets and book airbnb. (After paycheck)

14. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping.

15. Get car registration settled (After paycheck)

16. Return old drone for selling and unused merchandise (on weekday)

17. Buy a close friend a birthday present (After paycheck)

18. Put some money back into bank account during the week

For #11, I think I'm going to keep a separate running tab for it. I'm going to go watch episodes or play after I complete these bolded tasks. 

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For playing online recreational Poker with real money, I've decided to commit to a way of conduct so that it doesn't interfere with my psyche when things don't go the way I want it to. 

1. Play and exit with some profit whenever you feel like it.

2. Buy in for 50 big blinds each time and quit for the day after getting cleaned out four times. 

3. Quit for the day when your profit has become at least 200 big blinds.

4. Quit for the day when you get cleaned out with a bad beat. 

This is what I will commit myself to from now on easily. 

What I'm Finding Out

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Make this a habit. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. 

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Research for future trips. Buy tickets and book airbnb. (After paycheck)

14. Make this a habit. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. 

15. Get car registration settled (After paycheck)

16. Return unused merchandise (on weekday)

17. Buy a close friend a birthday present (After paycheck)

18. Prepare for upcoming trip by using checklist

#3 feels easily within my reach now. It's just a matter of time.

---

Ever since I've learned to shut out criticism and belittling comments from anyone, I just don't really care how they think about me anymore and am not even surprised by them treating me badly. I feel 100% good about what I stand for and this feeling extends to me mentally, physically, and emotionally as well. 

One of the tricks I use is to put on a little smile whenever anything feels bad for whatever reason. Another thing that works really well for me is my faith in Christ!!! The Lord's work done inside the heart of a person is amazing even if there's no physical healing done which would be a miracle. 

Trading Update

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Make this a habit. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. 

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Research for future trips. Buy tickets and book airbnb. (After paycheck)

14. Make this a habit. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. 

15. Get car registration settled (After paycheck)

16. Return old drone for selling and unused merchandise (on weekday)

17. Buy a close friend a birthday present (After paycheck)

18. Prepare for upcoming trip by using checklist

#3 feels easily within my reach now. It's just a matter of time.

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What really works is following Warren Buffet's first and second rules to investing. Rules #1 and #2 is to make sure you don't lose! From looking at my losses, it's all about limiting them and I could have saved myself 95% of my losses last night by looking at my trades in the evening. 

I decided to forgo doing this because I had a hot run where I gained over 40% in a period of two weeks. From looking at my trades and implementing a couple additional technical indicators on my base chart, I realized that I could have saved myself some money by just avoiding it at that time. I learned from my mistake and don't mind making adjustments, while continuously moving forward with my personal trading rules.

What's lucky for me is that my system is picking up plenty of opportunities on a daily basis to make profit so it doesn't hurt to lay off on some of them. From googling on how to make money with Forex, it says you have to be an extremely skilled trader and most traders will pretty much set themselves up for big losses in this market while concluding that it's some form of gambling. 

This isn't the case for me anymore, and I think I really have some working theories that are consistent in this market. It's just that I won't be sharing it with anyone and only helping a few special people in my life who I think are deserving of being blessed to be making money with me. I'm going to be very selective and don't care about making more money with people who have gigantic pockets. 

With my system, I have accepted that I can limit losses and set myself up for money making opportunities by trading once per market session. There are three main sessions in a 24-hour slot, so it makes sense for me to break it down and conveniently trade in the morning, late afternoon, and late evening or before I hit the sack since this system is catered to only me and I can even do it in my sleep! 

Potentially Seeing Plenty of Money

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Make this a habit. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. 

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Research for future trips. Buy tickets and book airbnb. (After paycheck)

14. Make this a habit. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. 

15. Get car registration settled (After paycheck)

16. Return old drone for selling and unused merchandise (on weekday)

17. Buy a close friend a birthday present (After paycheck)

18. Put some money back into bank account during the week

19. Fun task: catch up on episodes for a movie and to keep up with a close friend

20. Prepare for upcoming trip by using checklist

#3 really does seem believable for me right now. 

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The art of getting rich off of trading is practically limiting losses and making huge gains while letting that keep on piling up by grabbing as much ROI as you can monthly! I might have come across an ingenious method that I just invented out of luck and creativity, but it's been convenient for me in making some money. Over the past months, I have been perfecting a system and with some tinkering, it's starting to make healthy returns!  I don't ever plan on commercializing this product while only wanting to help out a few special people in my life. 

A conservative investor I highly respect talks about how you can't time the stock market, which I completely believe. I think when it comes to speculating other financial instruments like cryptocurrency, then it's definitely possible with the right technical indicators and methods. This is a work of art in itself and takes a lot of patience while testing it with using small amounts of real money to eventually make a living off of it. It's important to never risk any money you can't afford to lose, so it won't be smart to put it all on the line with just a few trades. If it goes wrong, then it becomes a lot worse than when you win because the wins won't sustain your living after a while and statistically, you will have some bad trades that wipes out a big portion of your account which will be more difficult to recover from.

I don't think some people are able to learn from this, and hopefully, they will learn their lesson by moving on to better things instead of continuously doing this destructive habit with their financial assets. 

Hopeful About What I'm Believing

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. Fall in love with the type who fulfills my preferences and then marry this good woman.

2. Work out regularly with cardio-muscular exercises. 

3. Become a millionaire with a lot of free time on my hands as soon as possible without stressing myself out. 

4. Make this a habit. Play everywhere with the DJI FPV drone.

5. Buy a single family home. 

6. Finish my software engineering related courses.

7. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. 

8. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! 

9. Read as a habit

10. Force myself to initiate cooking.

11. Force myself to initiate doing proper things at work.

12. Speed up process.

13. Research for future trips. Buy tickets and book airbnb. (After paycheck)

14. Make this a habit. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. 

15. Get car registration settled (After paycheck)

16. Return old drone for selling and unused merchandise (on weekday)

17. Buy a close friend a birthday present (After paycheck)

18. Put some money back into bank account during the week

19. Fun task: catch up on episodes for a movie and to keep up with a close friend

20. Prepare for upcoming trip by using checklist

To get to #3, I have pretty much adopted a waiting game for the most part while being as smart as I can be. I do believe that I might have cracked some code with trading my style off the Forex market and that it could turn out to become something lucrative and fast yielding. I'm not going to pressure the special individuals I handpick into making a ton of money with me in the future.  

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I believe that a buddy is seriously an idiot. Also, a soulmate thought she could get away with joking about something related to me indirectly that could personally be felt as derogatory when the tables are turned on her. I hope she learned her lesson. It's all in the past now. 

I'm not associating with the buddy I just alluded to. I think he's a lost cause and born to think pretty dumb while feeling that he's entitled and special after all the hard work he put into something and not getting the actual results he wanted. I think he can seriously benefit from seeing a therapist to cope with this common loss, if it's too much for him to handle on his own.