Message To Jerky Jarred

***Man, I didn't know how geeky funny I was. I was a really smart guy actually, and it really looked like I was totally under control and capable of working hard to settle things down. I really had the make-up for it, but my emotions weren't healthy at the time. ***

*** It's life man. Things happen for a reason and I'm grateful to have gone through it and despite me wanting to cry over it with tears and reflect on it with a lot of anger, I will subject myself to the Lord's will in the end. ***

Hi everyone [reply to Jerky Jarred's dumb response],

I totally disagree with the statement of my messages being inappropriate. Those messages on facebook pretty much are confidential and never gave anyone access. The "note" is actually a convenient spot for typing my thoughts. Just ask if anyone could see the message. This was pretty much an experiment to you guys to see what was going to happen. It reflects more on your preferences. You stated that I had it coming and you warned me to not to message someone else. You did not warn me to stop messaging you. Chris and you guys were pretty open to any messages. I have Chris' response on one note, and I also have your response with you removing your note tags. Basically, the level of inappropriatenss pertains to you guys assuming the role of trying to solve this dilemma that you felt with me. You basically had it coming with those messages because I have the right to communicate with whatever medium, as long as I show consideration. Do you think that typing a private note on facebook which no one can see and was on your facebook is inappropriate? Let the leaders come up with the solution. I'm going in to talk to you directly. I don't mean to impose strong intentions in an offensive manner to you but it's part of my human drives. Let the Lord deal with it, and you go on with letting go of trying aid me with this situation. I am willing to see what you are ready to do in person. Because you broke off in bad character, it is a sign that you had it not fully driven about riding upon God's grace. It is also another sign that you could not advise in the best manner possible, and since this is dealing with our privacy in some sense, you advertised it to me directly. If others know about it through gossip and you, then the privacy has already been breached. It looks like you guys are basically uncomfortable about dealing with helping me. I don't think it's your call of duty from God this time around.

Just give proof will you about stoping with an e-mail previously, which I suppose you do not have. Others who have demonstrated slight less offense have messaged me about their problems. I have acted in accordance to what I had to do, which was basically to apologize. I can't see things without directness of your details. You are just expressing feelings, and it is something that we are all responsible for controlling, unless you can prove it somehow you were wronged. Do you state that you never had any bad feelings about assuming this role? The practicality I suppose is that I feel that I'm on safe waters to get the message across how I deem neccessary because it shows you have not shown good character in dealing with my situation. In other words, I think you are not right about imposing a restraining order because you are not the person in charge of making that decision. Neither is the church leaders. It is definitely a decision the individual makes and they have basically said they are cool with me. I just need to figure out a way to get it across the way things should be.

I'm waiting for the final leader's response, which might be none at all and I'm open to that possibility. I'm going to directly deal with Jarred and Chris's unmanly complaints. =D I am also going to deal with outside influences that have come into this exterior cover of murmur with me. If you can't prove it, then you have no right to man the way I should behave. I would be breaking the law then, if you could prove it with what I been asking about. I've been saying observe my exact actions and tell where I'm going wrong- also, stop looking at other's behavior to it; there is no core justification to stay routed in it. It is like a slippery slope. I think of it as a slippery slope because reasons of offense stem from underivative emotions, and I see to it that there's a possible collision to my benign desires.

Jarred, you have to find another way to state you want to go ahead and file a restraining order, if I transgress your flawed arrangment. That's what my phone calls were about. I'm finding an opening, and it's like you aren't going to stop me. Do you have a problem with that that you need to ask leaders for some humble advice? We're all in this together...