Okay, I'm friends with taller women and I just don't care now that they are taller than me. Or I'm just starting to get used to the idea of being the shorter man who just stays composed with himself.
I'm finding out that what I'm trying to get in excess is probably better experienced with the future wife if I ever marry. I should just leave it in the God's hands and also mine too now. I still struggle with the feelings of wanting to have sex every so often. I end up just masturbating to porn, which I'm not proud of saying but I'm just revealing this about myself. I would like to end this activity if I can before finding a hot wife.
It's sort of like a drug and something I revert back to once in awhile. It's something that I can't control too heavily and find myself in rebellion with God. I'm just wanting to turn my back then right there because my heart is incapable of listening to God's goodness or to be able to understand the promises. I think it's through this hardship that God would really like me to endure. I think through the Holy Spirit, Jesus truly wants to comfort me and give me that assurance that everything will be all right. I just haven't been able to grab a hold of it yet fully because a few things still test my patience and get me angry and wanting to think about crazy thoughts.
Academy of Scrappy Credible Undergraduate Desire
