The past couple days I have been reverting to watching TV, some anime shows, playing Poker, and getting off to sexy girls doing porn. Yeah, it sounds like it could be a typical young man's life while being single and trying to ease up a little tension from feeling lazy. It's just that I'm not heavily satisfied with the watching TV part and looking at porn.
It really felt empty honestly and I could do better. I felt this excitement with wanting to look at porn again and once that was over, the desire left me so I guess it really is just from craving sex more than wanting to constantly watch it to fill some gap in my life. I felt bored while looking at sexy ladies and was like to myself I want one to have sex with right now in person! Yet, I won't go out and hire a prostitute because I want to find a high quality girl for myself to marry and then do a whole lot of that because I will find her someday when she's hot, nice, and sexually attracted to me. If she gets ugly later, then oh well I'll ride the experience and keep using it just like how a cool car will have some wear and tear someday. It will still get the job done. If it's marriage we're talking about, then the thought of finding the ideal girlfriend goes out through the window.
Having a good amount of lady friends and being nice to them is fun to me. I'm pretty loyal to my faith in Jesus so that means not going around trying to have an affair with someone else's girl.
