I'm pretty nitpicky about my grammar so I decided to let one word go which throws off the whole meaning of one sentence. It's a pretty cool inadvertent effect. This also gives me a little personal insight with how I have said and written things without being aware of it and then causing a few people to flip the handle and go off on me while losing their tempers. As annoying it was while trying to be a people pleaser, I just couldn't live up to their expectations. Recalling it is what it is, I'm still lucky to be where I'm at because of what they tried to physically do to me. It was silly because I did nothing and they still lost a court battle with me in the end. This is where I find myself to be really lucky while being able to laugh about it.
Yeah, I can easily argue that I'm having a better time than they are and I'm in a better place now but the more important thing to me is to realize that I want to still be a gentleman about all of this stuff, no matter how much it annoys me underneath. It seriously comes and go now, and I've learned to be calm about it when people say stuff that irritates me. I try not to show my angry look on the exterior and keep all of it internalized. I could be thinking anything about how stupid it is and how this one person is missing a step because I think I have the best opinion about it, but I'm just saying "Yeah" and listening to them talk and letting it pass by. This feels like a relationship with a good girl who called me up early in the morning to speak her mind out to me. She's a simple minded person who loves her family more than all the guys she's dated; she's an asexual so it sucks that she calls me a big brother in her circle. Being like the only guy friend left in her close circle, she says it means a close bond and that's all it is to her, so it's not like I'm actually friend zoned I guess.
I've only shared by text with her that we have an asexual open relationship while laughing about it, even though it's true to me and she was probably mad at me temporarily for messaging that to her. Yeah, she feels like an open partner to me just that she's off-limits for any romantic or sexual endeavors. I guess it's safe to say we have a better bond than what a typical brother and sister would form since we both carry different genes. It's not that bad, but I think it bothers both of our moms and a few close friends because they want us to be seriously dating someone to enjoy the privileges of having sex! I have dated someone I became attracted to already and she's still single and we have our future dates on hold since she's injured. We will have to see where that leads to since I'm definitely interested in her from having a lot of valuable personal reasons.
