Staying Occupied While Being Patient

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take a shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, doing work, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

Summary of interpersonal goals:

Work on close friendships and love.

---

What did I do right today? 

I am now fully trying to make the right kind of approach for finding joy.

---

What feels impossible is enjoying a great relationship with a charming narcissist. I managed to finally do it against the odds. It's a shame that another person I formerly called a soulmate is currently a narc as well. I am naturally not reacting to it in any negative manner while accepting it without any harmful intentions. 

It looks like I've become a lot stronger about being able to move on even if I hit her up later and she feels that she will never be able to get past it. I can then sort of laugh at her own folly on lacking some admirable abilities or qualities while feeling bad for her. I can already find better people to associate with so it's not really a big deal to me anymore. 

However, once a soulmate then always a soulmate so I'll live with it while knowing that it's not really the expected way of going about things. I can definitely find someone better than this soulmate to be with for the rest of my life. 

I do need to be around people every once in a while. I don't need to really interact with them heavily and only want to feel someone else's presence to be happy. I'm mostly an extrovert. 

With all the narcs who have been trying to push forward their agenda with me whether I did something perceivably right or wrong, I just realized that my best defense is to provide them with better advice or think about one to the best of my ability. This way, I won't ever go crazy while being mad underneath and can also sense their opinion might sometimes be a good one. 

Finding the Right Kind of Personal Balance With Fulfillment

  4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, doing work, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

Summary of interpersonal goals:

Work on close friendships and love.

---

What did I do right today? 

I am now fully trying to make the right kind of approach for finding joy.

---

A major hindrance for myself that I have taken notice of is giving into my narcissistic nature. It doesn't bring me any pleasure to dwell on it. I finally realized this was my mistake the whole time. I also notice this nature in other friends as well who frustrated me a great deal with pressing their own agenda on me.

It's good to not react negatively, so basically not get bothered by it. If it does bother you and you act out on the feeling then you're being a narcissist in that moment. There really shouldn't be any need to complain about it, unless your life is in danger. Also, a few peers who freaked out because of me were taking it way overboard while fussing over a petty misunderstanding. Because of this, I now know they were behaving like narcs. 

From not admitting to being a narc myself anymore, I can focus on living a balanced life better and work hard for my own happiness. 

Experiencing Mental Stability in a Volatile Trading Market

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, doing work, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

Summary of interpersonal goals:

Work on close friendships and love.

---

What did I do right today? 

Patience and persistence to obtain perfection in making money is starting to pay off.

---

The thing about working hard and then obtaining a nice payoff afterward is that it can make you feel lazy. I think it's a rare thing to keep on being consistent successfully and maintaining it at a high pace. Maybe it's more sensible if it's required in your profession, like being an athlete. 

For myself, the balance I'm experiencing feels unprecedented and just keeps on getting better as I make proper adjustments along the way. In a matter of few days, I have experienced giant growth in my Forex trading portfolio. I am now at 25% total profit for this month alone! This is amazing considering how I have been placing low risk trades and piling them up. 

Being a private and individual retail Forex spot trader, it feels good to have something developing in place that's not well-known nor widely talked about and to experience some good profit. It really came down to tinkering my own system at my own expense and that's how it should be. 

Really Excited for Money Making Technique

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, doing work, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

Summary of interpersonal goals:

Work on close friendships and love.

---

What did I do right today? 

I'm starting to brilliantly come up with a trading system that makes money consistently.

---

For my theory that I'm testing, I'm modeling how the market behaves. There are breakouts, reversal, and counter trend/sideway markets. I'm looking to position myself favorably to cash in profit systematically. 

It's so far been working.

Things on Autopliot

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, doing work, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

Summary of interpersonal goals:

Work on close friendships and love.

---

What did I do right today? 

I am putting in a lot of effort to make good money.

---

I think a few things I have on autopilot are driving to places, watching shows, and engaging in leisure. I also don't have developing my Christian faith as part of my daily list because I seem to be satisfied already taking care of it anyway.

When I have some other things ingrained in me then maybe I won't have to list them anymore. I do want to complete everything else because I will then feel like I'm balanced. 

Things to Do

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I am putting in a lot of effort to make good money.

---

Honestly, I haven't really been doing a lot but it looks like I have this sense of urgency again to try creating a healthy routine for myself. 

I have realized that complaining about not getting what you want isn't really going to make things better. It's better to just not be bothered by it and do what you can to overcome the situation and work at obtaining happiness. 

I think it's just a matter of pushing yourself. At least I do have a personal reward system that I can enjoy which is pretty much playing Poker with play money online and watching anime. I think as long as I can get all my work done then I shouldn't be feeling bad about indulging in those two things a little if there's a little down time that I can spare. 

Reviewing Yesterday's Actions

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I am undergoing a review of my state of mind and how I could improve my own performance.

---

Something great about trial and error and having a blog like this is that I feel safe to write whatever appropriate thing that I want without any fear of repercussions from some narcissists! I seem to have crossed the lines of narcs several times who were supposedly my friend or acquaintance, even though I was one myself. I never sought to judge people's personalities in the beginning from not being comfortable with it. Nowadays, I'm doing it naturally without feeling bothered by it if I did, which would have originally come from my former narcissistic self. 

I'm stable consistently and feel good now. I am a new person for the better! 

This being said, I would like to push myself so that I don't feel like I wasted my time like yesterday. It was a lot of fun but it feels like it came up short of my personal expectations. This is all it is and I'm not so bothered by it as I used to be. I'm going to be working on making better changes and working hard to get this well-deserved feeling of being balanced daily. 

Disciplining Self for Better Balance

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I am understanding the willpower to push myself and get proper things done daily to stay content.

---

I do feel overwhelmed a little with some of the tasks that I have laid out before me. I have gone with disregarding these feelings to the point of burning myself out or not willing myself to get back into it again if something happened.

I'm realizing that it's probably because of my former nature as a narcissist. For me, being a narc was a truly negative quality. For possibly some, they may think there's nothing wrong with being a narcissist themselves. I'm not really going to argue with it being good or bad.  

Coming to this realization and improving myself to be the ideal person that I think I really am, it's helping me to stay mindful with an open heart to find a good woman to fall in love with and start a family. 

Initiating Romance

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I am starting to see what romance is about.

---

What I'm noticing is that there's no reason to hide out there and to come clean about yourself. It sucks to be a vulnerable narcissist in this situation who relies on receiving brownie points from friends and to feel brought down by them sometimes.

It's better to not be worried with those types of feelings and to stay stable. A lot of my main circle of friends I have gotten to know are also narcissists. It has been frustrating from being around them sometimes, and I just tried to keep on chugging it along. They aren't that mean though. 

I finally see it from being able to judge their personality so I don't even need to take it the wrong way so much anymore if they sometimes act weird or pathetic and even my parents have acted narcissistic with me too. A lot of my social problems have originated from feeling personally conflicted with narcs. To add insult to injury, I was even a narc myself!

I no longer admit to being one now and have a stable grasp on all of my personal situations. A narc can still be one of the most stable, coolest, and nicest people out there, but a lot of times, we hear about those few bad apples. There are available women out there who are the right kind of people for me to practically be with. There's no need to become a narcissist from not finding one any sooner. I can still be happy about where I am in life and just let my love life flow into existence naturally with an open mind and heart. 

A narcissistic friend tried giving me advice. He gets his high out of feeling he helped someone while he's also living on a high note and takes it personally if you don't see it his way and keeps on trying to spoon feed his approach with you. If he really cared, then he would have wondered if he was really bugging me about all this. He never asked while wanting his own agenda to be met. He never fully got what he wanted and after a few attempts which led to him getting rebuffed badly, he took it the wrong way. I'm not so bothered by seeing him as just another narc. I also have evidence of him not shining so well with his text messages with me which disrupted the ego of my main female friends who are narcs. The same goes for them who I thought that I maybe had a chance with. I recognize their narcissistic tendencies even though they aren't that mean. 

I think how a possible romance started out for me was just a nice woman initiating a casual message and me staying open-minded about it. It seems like she took a liking to me and I eventually warmed up a little to her also. 

For the arranged dates that I have, I'm open-minded about accepting any opportunity I have. It's been a great learning experience for me. I'm not going to try to force it and just be honest about it in person, which is probably not my strongest suit when it comes to dating since I'm so inexperienced. Yet, I've been researching and being reminded continually of all the classical ways people have gone about it before me. It's definitely hard work and I think it is totally worth it. 

Revising Theories for Personal Trading

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I am still learning to make profit comfortably off of trading and developing a personal system.

---

From not being deterred anymore with taking some hits, I can analyze and model what my mistakes were and just keep on refining my techniques. 

I pretty much see that the market can either have break out, overbought, oversold, or sideways conditions. I'm learning to trade with all of these factors effectively on the time frame that I feel most comfortable with. It's starting to make some sense for me and I'm hoping that it will keep on lasting as I keep on refining this system. 

It's something that I see myself becoming rich over. 

Living a Better and Mentally Stable Life

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I'm starting to make sense of the good people I attract in my life.

---

I think it first comes off with accepting my short height and not being so narcissistic about it. The main reason is that those feelings just don't feel good and it does make me want to complain and generalize things in a negative way while letting that center around me in a bad way. It's pretty much narc-related and being a polite narc from wanting to be a people person didn't help me out from feeling vulnerable a lot too.

From learning to cut it out while realizing that some of my good friends and acquaintances have been acting like narcs as well, I am feeling much more stable now. It's crazy how that's the main smart thing I just needed to do for myself. 

I'm now ready to go on my way to earn a killing with my trades and investments while having some passive income. 

Being Friends With Narcissists

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I'm realizing how selfish some of my closest friends really are now.

---

I didn't really put much thought into it from trying to be a gentleman but now I realize that I really am capable of being at my best without giving over to any narcissistic tendencies. I am associating narcissism with selfishness a lot. 

Most of my friends I identify to be narcissists aren't really all that bad. They can be nice people as well, but it can be a challenge to not feel frustrated with them sometimes. I say the current closest friend out of all narcissistic friends is a functional narc because she doesn't want to act like her dad who she claims to be a dysfunctional narc. 

It's nice to know that I never ended up marrying and divorcing a couple narcissistic friends I thought were possible to date. Who am I kidding now? It really comes down to having a stable mind and not giving into that narcissism myself first. I can identify the feeling arising and stop it in its tracks. It's no longer something that controls me as a slave. It's always going to be a part of me, but I carry forward without it hindering my happiness and progress. 

Interesting Thoughts

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I am reading up on advice for dating a certain type of Asian woman.

---

For the friend I want to talk about all this the most, it just doesn't feel appropriate anymore. She's likely not even going to say anything to me about it and just be like "Sure hon!" underneath her kind words and blessings. 

She believes that I will have the greatest success of hitting it off with a lady who has the ethnicity which dominates this country I have grown up in. It makes absolute sense. 

However, I'm dating someone who is in the ethnic minority. It helps that I have a brain that's capable of being considerate like I read up on tips online with how to be a gentleman. It feels like a drag but taking care of your appearance is very important. 

For being just myself, I know a certain trait about myself that makes me narcissistic and also how I could meet other women who I perceive to be self-centered. At the end of day, I won't be getting with these narcs anyway and I'm going to have fun reflecting on the aftermath and using this experience to better myself. 

I have a criteria that I'm looking for now, so it helps to go along with that. If she doesn't fit in, then I will settle for trying to be friends. If she doesn't want to do that, then I will let her go while thinking she isn't that laid back or also a narc. It's possible that a narc might agree to be friends with me, so maybe she would want to keep her options open for trying to use me later for something. 

Good People Do Exist

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I am realizing that keeping an open mind and straddling along with some creativity while using everything to help out to get things in order is getting me to improve myself!

---

It looks like I finally could have landed myself a girlfriend who really has natural characteristics that are similar to mine. I guess my women are out there! Besides, I now think it's narcissistic to be wanting to feel a certain way based on how a person looks and making that a criteria to being with someone. I believe that I am friends with several ladies who are narcissists to a certain degree. 

It's crazy. Dealing with these narcs isn't really all that bad because most of them are capable of compromising and still being nice. It's just that their belief and approach to life starts with being centered around them. If they don't get what they want or you don't agree with them enough times they instigate something, then they vent about it with someone. I now realize this a lot more. 

Feeling like a shorty and having all this self-loathsome criticism of myself is narcissistic too but it was never helpful to have it. All the negativity is still narcissistic. There's no need to dwell on those things anymore because it just won't solve anything. It's better to be strong and courageous about not letting those worries get to you because it won't do you any good. 

Responding in a harmful manner from those who say hurtful things to you directly or indirectly is also narcissistic. Now I know that I've been good friends with narcs the whole time. Still these narcs aren't really all that bad. 

Interesting Belief About People

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I am starting to openly communicate about my faults and accepting how the chips may fall. I understand doing this while constantly feeling stable underneath.

---

With the few bad apples being angry and acting like monkeys that went bonkers, I just think they were acting like angry narcissists. They were angry about not getting what they wanted out of me and still going to be that way. The incident didn't even deal with them and they were offended that I disagreed with them. I'm not going to agree with them like they are some god in a cult.

Anyways, I think it's narcissistic too if I were to become angry at them and start spewing insult after insult while yelling at them. It doesn't help my case in that I already did this to a few of them. Man, it felt so bad for me to do that. I don't know how being a narcissist is even helpful at this point. It's better to abandon it entirely.

I came up with a good strategy that finally works on these crazy narcs. Don't get me wrong though because being a narcissist doesn't mean you can't be the nicest guy in the world. I was called the nicest guy in the world at one point, so I really know what that statement means because I lived it. I was being a narcissist for all the wrong reasons that kept on feeling bad for me. Man, I needed help. 

Today, I don't admit to being a narcissist. The cool thing about being a narc though is that it has health advantages. A true narc doesn't see narcissism as a bad thing. 

I'm not cut out to be a vulnerable narc anymore. There's no good reason for me to act like one when others are being one to me already. 

Reviewing Personal Tasks Continued

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I am understanding how to process my happy thoughts and to be more balanced.

---

I think figuring out this whole narcissism thing along with my complex while angry has been helping me navigate through my main emotional struggle better. I feel so much better equipped moving forward now. I think to be rejected based on not having certain appearances is narcissistic too because well I'm not going to be with that person anyway for that reason. For that person, it's better to be the other person she wants to be with than being with that girl in general. It's because she's doing something self-centered with wanting to feel a certain way about how a person looks. 

I don't think judging a person based on their personality is a bad thing at all. It took me a while to realize all these things for myself, so now I'm ready to move forward with this happy and reasonable mindset without being too anxious about anything in general. 

Now with doing homework, I think I'm only going to spend about an hour on it a night to feel like I'm eventually getting somewhere in life. 

Overall, I feel like if I can get all these summary of tasks done then I feel like I can let loose and be a little more stupid without feeling so bad about it each night. 

Reviewing Personal Tasks

4AverageLife's Main Personal List

1. I want to be married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and to have this undying love and companionship with her and then maintain being a family while being a wealthy man! I must choose and be loved by this woman. Five criteria to look for:  I'm just looking for 1.) a sexy lady who is 2.) laid back, 3.) she wants to be with a guy,  4.) cares about personality more than appearances, and 5.) is usually interested in getting intimate just for fun! I'll be happy to settle with one of those women for the rest of my life.
   
2. I want to be rich from trading and investing in options, stocks, and Forex. Eventually, I want this to also include some real estate and bonds. I also want to make a lot of money from getting involved in IT which focuses on software engineering, IT security, and database administration. 
3. Buy a single family home. I must be rich!
4. Do some smart cooking. I must be vigilant, committed, not distracted, and feeling lots of time.
5. Work on applying clean stuff to my face. Buy related products. I must feel comfortable.
6. Continue to do growing-naturally-taller routines, even if some of them are a scam! I must be committed and remind myself. 
7. Work out four days a week with alternating muscular, full body,  and yoga classes.  I must be committed and remind myself.
8. Conduct regular hygiene. Take shower before sleeping. Don't forget the mouth guard. I must be committed and remind myself.
9. Finish my software engineering related courses. I must be committed and remind myself.
10. Read something from a book. I must commit.  

Purpose: "I am brilliant and universally favored by others therefore I will live the life of a wealthy gentleman." 

My Top 10 values are in order

1. Faith
2. Love, Happiness, and Joy 
3. Personal freedom
4. Balance
5. Understanding
6. Health
7. Strength and self-reliance
8. Inner harmony
9. Goodness
10. Enjoyment

I see myself as a fit and cut up dude enjoying physical intimacy with a beautiful woman who is my faithful wife and she's loving every second of it, too! I am also a rich man with successful results that are visible while managing any personal hassles or adversity with positivity that is second to none. I make money while having a lot of free time on my hands. 

Affirmations of what I want:

1. I am married to a hot woman who enjoys making love almost all the time and now has this undying love and companionship with her and maintaining a family as a wealthy man! I have chosen and am loved by this woman.
2. I am now averaging reading at least thirty books a year!

Affirmations of what I want to believe:

1. I am always fully happy with what I have going on in life.
2. I am capable of not feeling hurt or bothered by others.

Affirmations for compelling visions:

1. I have a purpose for living.
2. I visualize my dreams with clear and specific goals in mind.

Affirmations for thinking, speaking, and affirming into existence:

1. I have control over my thoughts and stay focused on my affirmations.
2. I enjoy thinking with optimism and a cheerful heart.

Affirmations for connecting to the heart:

1. I keep myself open-minded to finding my woman.
2. I am pursuing things that really matter to me the most.

Affirmations for acting:

1. I am taking action right away without letting it linger.
2. I let myself accept great opportunities when the situation arises. 

Summary of personal tasks:

Trading/investing, working out, growth stretches, ab belt workout, push ups/pull ups, facial product, showering, brushing teeth twice, reading, homework, and other errands. 

---

What did I do right today? 

I am reviewing my planned actions.

---

I pretty much have the act of trading/investing and reading down. I'm pretty inconsistent with doing push ups daily which is what I need to push myself into doing. 

I don't quite feel stuck anymore about working out daily, so I just need to try committing to it. I'm expecting to do a HITT workout once a week and when that stops causing my body to ache, I'm going to try out parkour. 

For a friend who works out, she really isn't the most fitness type of person and neither does she eat that clean. She's also a mean, cranky, and narcissistic person sometimes even though she can put on her charm. Seeing her true colors has been nasty and I do accept who she is but I'm not ready to be around her negative energy right now. 

She believes that to get a work out, you should do work outs that are hard on yourself and feel quite unnatural. I totally disagree with her workout flow now even though I claimed to have liked it in the beginning. I think it's better to be flowing with more efficiency while letting it be natural and comfortable while allowing yourself to be creative and increasing physical load while having self-discipline with your fitness goals. This can also mean increasing upon personal investments which she really doesn't want to do out of some time, space, and cost inconveniences while wanting to be a minimalist. She would pretty much be at her limit, if I keep on trying to follow and impress her in the end. 

Having a gym membership in the end does make sense, if you don't have the space currently for all of that gym equipment. It's ideal for me to set up everything on my own property, so I look forward to the day I get there but in the meantime, a gym membership is more feasible.  

She really does believe in maximizing your workout while putting in the least amount of time. It doesn't make sense for me with how she's doing it because I believe her workout forms can be prone to injuries and being yelled at by her from not doing her workouts the way she thinks is proper isn't going to improve upon the situation. She isn't even a certified trainer and never really had anyone else besides me who wanted to always be physically trained by her consistently. It doesn't make sense for me and feels dumb now. She's a terrible match for me to have liked her in the beginning. She might not think that's funny. She's not really going to have much more muscle growth anyway and I don't see what she really has to show for herself with her body. I'm still stronger and more explosive than her anyway.

I'm judging her personality now and I think she's a screwed up narcissist who did that all to herself. She should work on not focusing so much on things she can't really obtain in the present moment and be more patient with a positive outlook in life and putting in natural effort with being balanced.

I think I just need to be smarter this time around and who really cares if others want to laugh at me about all of this. I'm cool about honestly self-deprecating myself and secure about others walking out on me. I still have this calm and happy energy underneath me that I feel grateful to have been blessed to receive from the Lord.