Leap Year

A crazy thing happened to me yesterday. I guess what I went through really sucked even though I was hanging out with a female friend and one of my closest buddies. I managed to ask this girl if she was interested in hanging out, and what I really liked about her is that she was really upfront with me in letting me know she wanted to go with me to the destination I was headed.

From the position I have in my dad's company and being single, I did get to meet a courteous and cute Korean girl and get initially greeted by another pretty Korean girl. I just don't care that they're really good looking or not; it doesn't matter to me because I'm not really going to do anything with it anyway. It seems like it's feeling like a hassle in going out with so many girls and never settling down. I'm honestly not seeking for temporary pleasures now but instead looking for a long term and fulfilling relationship with a wonderful woman.

These Korean girls were also taller than me, and honestly, I wasn't really bothered by my own height anymore. I'm starting to think it really doesn't matter if the woman isn't that bothered by it. At least it can develop into just a decent friendship and from being short, I might be able to discern and get to be around people who have beautiful attitudes. In a way, being short and finding the one-in-a-million inwardly beautiful woman to marry is being very upfront.

This is pretty much my last post for the whole year and from being the year we had an extra day, I am making honorable mentions to anybody who got to visit this website.

Meaning of Friendship

In times of these seasons, it's just great to be around a loving family or to come back home every year to celebrate Christmas with other kin. It's just a no brain-er! What I'm finding to be pretty extensive is actually being a true friend for someone; I've watched all these movies where actors seem to have great chemistry with each other and get along really well with each other like they're the best of friends. Even if the friendship doesn't look so impeccable on the movie screen, I'm sure if the actors are pretty compatible with each other and click then they'll be staying in touch.

Man, I just listen to people now and no matter how rowdy and annoying stuff I've been hearing now, I just can't really stay mad at the person anymore. I guess people go through these phases where they feel like killing each other, but then decide to drop something by some act and reconcile. Those type of movies are pretty funny to watch like Jingle All the Way. For the holiday cheer and fun, it was actually a movie about two strangers becoming rivals and then becoming enemies of each other so they can compete to win the attention of their child. It obviously favored Arnold Schwarzenegger more and with his pretty ruddy appearance I guess it makes sense with the unyielding spirit he had in obtaining a selfless goal.

Anyhow, the plot shows that Arnold's character got to be the lucky one in the movie no matter how many people would want to claim it's a racist movie. Anyway, Sinbad's character could have been played by anyone and Phil Hartman played a sleazeball too so definitely, there really isn't any sense in calling the movie racist without being unreasonable. I pretty much talked myself out of thinking that movie was being unfair to the black community.

Happy Christmas Eve

Okay, I'm going to let this one out of the bag. I bought a really expensive desktop for my little sister. Since I know she could have been checking up on this blog every once in awhile, now I'm letting it spill because she isn't going to checking my blog anytime soon this whole year. I guess I just know her just like that. We had a little communication breakdown while she was driving me around like a crazy fiend on the wheel. Man, I can't see her driving really well from being distracted about her weird and indecent thoughts. She was conveying some of them with me; man it was torture.

The desktop is pretty much a high i7 pentium model- something of the sort of the model i7 3770. It is decently priced and one of the fastest in the world. Along with other features, it has a 2 TB hard drive and 60 GB SSD, a blu-ray disc burner, 16 GB of RAM, and a 3 GB graphics card. With those types of specs, I would buy it for myself but for this year I decided that it would be best suited to go to my weird little sister. I can just say I'm doing it out of love for her. The desktop is found on the Costco website, even though I drove up to a couple stores to see if they had it- it really has to be ordered online so I paid a little extra for it, but I think for a $1000, it's a bargain and great deal.

It's time for me to wrap up the present and present it to her. That is so cool, I used the same word finally to mean something else in the sentence. Okay, almost done for the year in writing and just in time for Christmas and being home for getting some cornflakes.

Tales In My Life

Right now, I feel like I'm a really bad soul mate to someone. The reason for feeling this way is for these inexplicable, erroneous things about myself. Yet, knowing that I can't meet these perfect standards for this special person; I wish to overlook her flaws, too. It's just coming down to what's going to happen later down the road in our lives. It would be nice to end up settling down with her because of my feelings in thinking she's my soul mate, but it's not a necessary requirement for me. I can at least say we're destined to always be really good friends.

Aside from not really being the jealous type, there are also other women in my life I might have a chance to deal with. Knowing that I can get along with just about any woman now from being upfront with her and providing respect where I think she deserves it, there is a really exciting conflict I have set aside for the purposes of trying to think about it and cool down. It pretty much deals with a group of women about some small personal issue- my thought is that they're just feeling bad about something because they sense that I'm not providing some appreciation for them.

I'm no longer really being challenged for the way I see things now and neither is there really anyone standing in my way at the moment. I can also take some precautions and plan out every sophisticated general moves now to appease the direct concerns I have about revamping my image with those ladies. For the most part, if a man can't really be fully confident about being blunt in his thoughts and feelings to everyone then he's not really worth the hassle in working with. I think women are totally a different topic which I need to continue discovering for myself, and I find it to be really amusing with how I'm going to approach things next year.

So Very Close

I can now sense that I'm not too far from where I personally want to be at now. I'm still falling short in an area from being selfish and choosing to be ignorant about it. I guess sometimes despite the best intentions others try to send out as a message, there are still some elements that could be morally wrong and not good for the soul.

I'm going to make another adjustment to myself, dust myself off by asking for forgiveness from the Lord, and try again with permanently repenting from a selfish area! I guess it's totally lack of judgement and not having enough self-control at times for me. I'm willing to put myself through the same incident now and to work my way out of the situation by showing restraint continuously now. I guess we don't have so much time on this planet to be able to master everything, but I think it would be definitely vital for me to master just this one area that's just keeping me from obtaining personal satisfaction. It's just something I'm feeling and can't really express in words. It's something I need to continuously train myself to be aware of and then to play the right cards. I'm looking forward to the moment again and never losing hope in personally achieving a really humble thing that no one is really going to notice about me.

Approaching End of 2012

I briefly watched the end of a televised documentary about the Mayan calendar, and it pretty much said something about this year being where the center of the Milky Way which is called the Dark Rift will line up with Earth during the Winter Solstice and how we will get to see Venus during an eclipse. Man, that is cool!

It felt a little bone-chilling there for a moment, but I'm pretty excited to see what might happen to this seemingly unchanging world at the end of this year. What the researcher seemed to allude to for me is that the Mayans really based a lot of their religious beliefs based on the structure of the island they lived on. However, their mathematical and astronomical knowledge is so ingenious that I'm sure most of us would have never even sought to go that far out of our own imaginations.

Thinking Onwards

I'm finding out that I just might have an indomitable spirit when it comes to dealing with people. Although it's been awhile now since dealing with some weird people, I see that taking a straight forward approach in life won't really get frowned upon. An example of this is from just watching a T.V. commercial for Kay's Jewelers where a couple pick out a ring they both like at the store and then turns out to be a "perfect" match; afterwards, the man asks the woman to marry her right at the store- it's so straight forward and brought out smiles after discussing it with the women in my household.

I'm just going to do that and hold back nothing even if I'm going through a very weird time. I might as well not hide anything and pay for my immoral sins through reaping consequences now. I can't run from the ultimate judgement that is coming and it's pretty much going to happen to everyone, no matter how scary it sounds. I just made a symbolic remark, which I'm sure most people might have a slight clue of what I'm referring to. Basically to simplify my statement, everybody will pass away someday and hopefully everyone will live a really happy and meaningful life.

Meeting My Soul Mate

This is pretty crazy for me because I think I did meet her from about four years ago. I guess some romance was in the midst of developing but being the person I am, I didn't really pay attention to her. The interesting part is that after all those years passed by, we still remain really good friends after having never kept in touch.

She now has a boyfriend and has been in the relationship for long term so I'm assuming that my chances with her are over now. Some part of me still thinks that she's just procrastinating marriage because maybe she isn't convinced about something in her beau, or maybe she just wants to hold off on marriage for awhile. Anyway, having been pretty convinced that she's my soul mate and being the one who actually communicates with me very well and openly whether by text or in person; I hope she sends me an invite to any wedding like she said she would.

I'm also not very interested in her looks that much either but really care about her inner beauty so much more. When I got to see her after the four years of never hanging out, she is actually pretty hot but I felt so comfortable listening to any concerns she had and having fun hanging out. It's like I could never go wrong with her while being my true self- that's how it really looks like with me. I guess she's the one for me, but I care about her happiness more so this guy she's with makes her happy which she implied with me. I'll just have to wait and see if I find another to settle down with or not and how she ends up later in life.

Pretty Neat

I'm really grateful with a reader base or receiving a fresh amount of new visitors onto this blog. I still consider myself to be really small compared to what others can achieve, but I'm just so content and happy about maintaining this blog even though I might not feel like writing about anything on some days. It's pretty crazy content that I have put up here, and some of it is pretty sneaky and questionable but the good part is that I've limited it to be about having a sense of fun. 

With some of the posts I sort of hate keeping around, looking back at those posts, I'm actually laughing underneath about them now. I've become really comfortable within my own shell and really confident about discussing my beliefs and attitudes and giving reasons even if people are bothered by them! It's just words that convey a meaning, so I believe it's important to let out what you believe out there and eventually, if you make a name for yourself then more people will become accepting of you and start liking you. For some reason, I feel that anti-social people who just hate on my comments or others are left out of the equation now so I might as well just do my thing and let life take its course now. 

Really Cool Profit In Forex

Click to enlarge box

Currently, my swing trading system is giving me really favorable results even if I play a little out of the norm with some currencies at times. It's so far showing itself to be a winning system. Out of just a week in a half of trading, I have banked in a significant amount of profit as well as currently have about 1700 pips in profit with all those currencies. I'm just testing out how big I can mine pips with just about any currency minus the Scandinavian ones- it turns out that I now have over 300 pips on one of them and it's still growing strong. On average, 200 pips is a very decent, long term return. The first one showing in the box above is making itself out to be a risk reward ratio of 1 to 7! That is an insane amount of profit for a week in a half of letting it hang. It also seems like the winning percentage is big enough to stick with this system to make some overall profit. I'm loving it!

I am also currently messing around with a managed Forex account by some day traders who show themselves to be very profitable. It's only in demo mode so that's the best I can do in finding out what they are made of. I think my system might not really be suitable for copying by others because of my suspicions that it would create a bad spike for me in the market. I'm really going to limit my trading to just myself because of its highly inherent and risky nature. However, if a millionaire doesn't care about blowing his or her money and is willing to let me test my system out with no cares of losing just a million then might as well let myself get hired.

Giving Chase

This is something that I want to try out now. I realize that putting my fullest hopes and expectations on people themselves is only going to bring me occasionally disappointment with failures of living up to my views. For the most part, I do love people and I am going to have opponents in life just like everybody else; it just seems like the minority of people try to cause others distress and chaotic worry!

I'm going to put my hopes and expectations on the Lord. I'm going to give chase to God because I have this strong belief in Him. No matter what happens on this world or in my lifetime, I'm still going to believe there is a God up there reigning in heaven. While chasing after God, I'm still going to put my mind on things that appeal to me; just that the fear of the Lord in my heart is going to direct me in the right path that I really wish to go and to appease everything about me.

The hard and tricky part is dealing with the storms in my life and becoming short-sighted. I may become really impatient and emotionally depressed from being extremely bored with where I'm at and then try to live out my life in sinful pleasures. I'm aware of this, so it's a work in progress for me to get cured of my minor turrets syndrome which I feel when I'm extremely bored with life. It happens to me once in awhile when I'm not keeping in check with myself. I have yet to master this patience of struggling emotionally and keep my head up high!

Knowing What I Want

The bad part about knowing what I want is that it also ties in with my moral conscience. I know that sometimes through lack of control and envisioning myself being really happy, I miss out on discerning the negative consequences and make haste. What I feel when I don't give into my desires and wants is a whole lot of depression and boredom at times. These emotions are something I'm just getting tired of having to deal with daily.

Overall, I'm just going to have to find replacements with the use of my conscience where I'll be really happy to invest my time into. It's pretty much myself the whole time, and ultimately; no matter how bad the person I'm bothered with has been to me, I need to just compensate with it. I can't let my desires turn into obsessions that I don't want now and can't get out of. I don't want to lose my senses of decency and propriety while engaging the highly attractive rewards that come out from corroborating in the right areas.

Negative Effects

A negative experience at Hope of God Church in Los Angeles is causing me to avoid going to attending church now. I think they played a role in causing me to stumble. I guess since I realize it, I can't just sit around and mope about it all day now. The issue at hand is that I think attending a great church and being part of a fellowship is very meaningful and such a blessing even for nonbelievers!

It also remains part of my efforts to be consistent and make a commitment to attend. This would mean to be prepared to attend there the night before. It looks like I might have to be planning a week ahead of time and monitoring my actions, thoughts, and feelings leading all the way up to the day I set out to attend an assembling of the body. I'm not putting that much effort into attending church anymore. It's like I'm not really motivated to go, but I know that's it really good for me and I actually enjoy it. It feels like I've entrapped myself from being around highly discouraging people and just myself. However, when the moment comes I feel like I'll be ready to act and be highly decisive while direct without stumbling for a short period of time.

What I'm Trying

This is probably the first year I'm going to purchase my very own Christmas tree. It's going to be a live one and probably going to take some time decorate! I'm probably going to forcibly employ my little sister to do most of the work for me. I just paid for it out of my pocket and that's it. I'm also going to try to put lights up around my home too, which would be pretty fun to do for tradition.

I now have a pretty comfortable earning to buy healthy food and cook. I bought about three cooking books which add up to about 550 recipes, along with the other hundred free recipes I could search for online. I'm looking at only the quick recipes which wouldn't go under an hour for me. I guess since I'm a newbie at cooking, making everything under an hour in the beginning would be acceptable for me and considered fast in my standard. I'm also picking out the ones that would be the most flavorful for me and really healthy!

I'm now thinking about investing my time into my own better health and fitness. I have a job and a pretty comfortable living arrangement at the moment and a really nice currency trading career in the making. I guess there's seriously more to life than what meets the eye. I have realized that there seriously are women out there who just who go after a man with a great personality and elements that just influence him to be more attractive inwardly to the lady. I'm not going to base it on superficial things and look at how beautiful she is on the outside, I'm going to give the beautiful woman on the inside a chance; one of my friend's twin brother has stated that an inwardly beautiful woman is also a rarity to come upon.

Keeping It Open

When it comes to admiring women for me, I'm no longer really that picky now. I used to have a set of visual preferences of the type of girl I would want to end up marrying. I no longer value those shallow things. I have even called one of my friends Shallow Hal because of how he looks at a relationship in being with the best looking girl he could be compatible with. There's one woman he's really into, and I guess she's no fluke because a lot of people are attracted to her. It's the girl who played Lana Lang on WB's Smallville, which is a sci-fi T.V. show about Superman when he was in high school all the way up to donning his famous and colorful tights! The beautiful, Canadian actress Kristin Kreuk does seem to have a great personality. Furthermore, I didn't know she's pretty short; enough to be shorter than me! I guess I'm taller than some larger than life attractive females, like it matters to me now.

I pretty don't care how a woman looks now as long as I can be compatible with her and she has a great personality that pairs up well with mine. This means that there are so many available women out there for me to find the right match for me because I'm not getting delusional about finding the hottest girl out there like other guys. This also means that I don't care if a girl I become attracted to rejects my advances because of the opportunity I see unfolding before my eyes now. From keeping it open, my perspective has broadened in life and I see so many different and positive possibilities that would enrich my life along with boosting the experiences of others. My buddy says that he is after all, Shallow Hal except that he doesn't have a belly. My closest correspondent is so funny sometimes, and I guess what annoys me about him helps me keep things in perspective in life. The people who ran away from me are definitely missing out on what life has to offer- they are closing their minds and limiting themselves which can be very mentally unstable.

Now I Get It

I'm finally seeing that with the people who just act rather withdrawn with me and have personalities that seem to be bothered by me, they are pretty much a lost cause if I can't talk to them anymore. The type of person I am is that I'm not really going to turn away a person with just talking to them. I'm not the kind of guy who likes to run away, but I guess if it's the smart thing to do now then might as well.

Basically, on the pages of my Facebook, from my rough persona or something unappealing, I've been losing a little bit of friends on there. It's pretty funny how they allow me on their profile and then remove me after awhile. Well, they did involve themselves after agreeing to add me in the beginning. They make all these excuses of how they don't want to get involved, a breach of their personal space, or how it was their personal decision. I'm starting to see that it's probably because they're facing some health mental issues with me. For the ones who I can't really reach anymore out of lack of time and really talk to in person, it's pretty much a "See ya!" I sort of understand their dilemma and how they're going to feel a little sheepish and doubtful about their behaviors. I guess I'm not the kind of guy to try to fend off and move on with your life without feeling depressed!

Way To Get In the Door and Stay

This is for the people who have an insatiable desire to do something really bold after a group of anxious and callous people caused the man or woman to feel really upset and wronged over a little incident. I'm going to use the church I had trouble with as my real life example in giving advice of how to do what I'm setting out to do.

For a little background, the church is located in Los Angeles and they have an extremely bad image in my eyes now. It's so bad that even if they were to do good then they would still look corrupted as a whole. The name of the church is Hope of God Church in Los Angeles. They are what people might call a Pentecostal church even though they claim to be non-denominational. Watch out for these types of crazed individuals- they are nice but when the going gets tough, they are going to crack! Right now, the economy is really rough and the church seems to attract very sensitive Chinese and Thai believers. Also, they seem to be roughly outcasts in real life scenarios because they would rather stick to their own kind of believers and not be accepting of other like-minded believers out there.

I managed to be the way I am and get thrown out of their church! It's really funny, and I won't lie how much I've made people laugh over admitting it. They went so far as to even say that they are going to call the cops on me. Here's what makes them look bad and funny for my case- they threw me out after questioning whether I liked a few girls there or not in a relationship sense.

This is the way to stay out of trouble with these types of weird lunatics. Be extremely direct and honest even if you feel it's going to hurt their feelings. Just think that you gave them a chance to wise up and now you're going to reveal something to them they probably never knew. When you sense a lot of isolation and can't blend in with the crowd, this is really important LEAVE the PLACE and then try again the next following week. DON'T communicate what you are going to do with them- keep them guessing. If you can work through the anger and annoyances they feel with you by coexisting with everybody else, then their defense is  eventually going to go down and you will have room to feel the satisfaction of causing them to submit to you. When they act really dumb and neanderthal-like just walk away from them and do your thing while looking like everybody else in the surrounding. It's basically camouflaging yourself to the person and if someone were to call the cops on you like they said, then they are going to look very dumb and get the police officers who respond to the distressed call very angry and upset with the caller. Try it, it works! Be sure above all else to have a great reason for going into the territory of really messed up people and to be brave and ready to give up your life at any given moment of time while around them. Do everything in your power to prevent them to do anything bad to you and know the satisfaction despite what they do, they are always going to have the worst image labeled upon them- give them a sense of a guilt trip; it's the worst possible way and possibly like a nightmare for them but the greatest way to stay in until you decide to leave the establishment.

Getting Consistent With Forex Profit

With this method I put together through doing my way of studying and applying Forex, I saw that in just one trade I quintupled my stop loss which would result in a 10% increase of my account balance! This happened overnight for me and what happens to be the worst month to trade the Forex market for day traders.

Overall, I have amassed 1400 pips from trading all these different currencies while not really getting stopped out in one day. What I have before myself is a system that I'm consistently tweaking. It's something that culminates from two years of study, practice, and looking for the best way to make money in Forex while doing it using my preferences at large. These types of trades can only happen from being a swing trader.

If I can manually bust out these profitable types of trading very consistently on a monthly basis overall and can be really confident in my system then I am going to start trading some currencies. I might allow others to copy my trades for an extra charge but it's something I'll have to think about. Roughly, I'd rather keep this to myself because I don't want to frustrate people if they lose their money in a volatile market at the wrong time. More possibly, if I can be successful at this market then I would prefer to allow successful people with lots of money ranging in the millions who don't mind losing a million dollars (!) to hire me.

Saving My Energy For Expected Conflict

I've been reading up on the Bible and I believe that the context of what a person should and shouldn't do is really based on some precepts, such as loving others and having the best interest in them. Everybody works differently in this area even if I come across as a really rough person to some ultra sensitive girls.

The way I'm seeing that I'm functioning is to just be direct even if it feels like I'm making fun of the person and laughing after saying what I had to say. Basically, I'm just going to full out onslaught honest about everything and not hold anything back with no hold bars. I've watched some movies of how it seems like the protagonist is blackmailing some bad guy about turning him into the cops. If it's really that bad, I'm going straight to the cops without making any warnings!

If I end up getting killed by these losers I'm going to be engaged in a conflict with then well at least I'm happy in my beliefs of where my afterlife will be and I also have made peace with my personal living matters. I'm pretty much ready to go if it needs be even though I'm going to defend myself heavily and apply very painful self-defense tactics on others who just seem to have gone nuts and stupid in their dealings with me.

Little Steps

I'm not really under any get rich quick scheme anymore. I see that it's really more of a gradual process with a big learning curve. I'm just going after what really appeals to me now while researching on the facts. I guess I have always been pretty decent at being this type of person.

Something that I'm starting to question and work at is the idea of growing taller way passed puberty! A lot of people think that it's something genetic which is fine, but there are contradictions that do occur every once in awhile in the world. What I mean is that the parents could be really short but have children that are really tall. It's probably not going to happen that much, but there is this possibility. Therefore, I believe that it's fully not genetic. In addition, ever since I passed my growth spurt I have also managed to literally get an inch taller. Now, I'm working my way to another 1/2 inch while in my late 20's. This makes me feel pretty young and healthy!

I'm going to try out this work out program and see if I could tone down and acquire some ripped abs. I've also ordered some quick and healthy cooking recipe books to try it out. From what I've read, it starts with first eating healthy and then adding in the supplements and exercise; otherwise, it all goes to waste if your body isn't digesting the proper nutrients to build muscle and bone. A lot of things I'm looking at right now is really a long term investment. If I have the time and the right, available lady comes along for me, I'm also going to try to setting down with her now too. All of these things are just so long term and it's something that I'm really excited about doing even though I'm at utmost a nobody in this world.

Weighing In Percentages

Right now, I feel like I have a 100% chance of getting along with any woman and just being friends. With the idea of agreeing to date me, I see it being more like 25% with the ones I'm actually interested in while including the fact she's already dating someone. I guess those aren't really bad odds for me, and it's better than nothing. I'm not going to really work that hard either for getting a woman to go out with me- I'd rather just keep it natural and would want her to just love me for who I am.

One of my friends is pretty much a hit or miss type of person. He believes at the moment that the chance of meeting his soul mate is 0.01%. I basically told him to concur with his family's advice in going back to school and obtaining a degree. Maybe, he'll put himself in the position to meet someone interesting enough to possibly marry someday.

Relaxing More Often

I guess since I'm a natural guy and not married yet, I get these feelings of wanting to be married and affectionate to the wife. Sometimes, I wonder if my emotions in this area are much more stronger than the average person's. Anyhow, after feeling like I wasn't caring about how a woman dressed or appeared for awhile-now, I'm starting to feel a little of that nervousness with the thought of approaching her. I'm also enjoying the feeling a lot more than I used to; it makes me want to laugh inwardly. I guess when I'm chilling with friends, I don't really try to approach women unless I was by myself and felt like I had nothing to lose and was going to deal with all the hardships and mistakes.

I guess I'm just really selective on the people I want to approach directly about being in a relationship. I don't really try to give into that much as I did in the beginning. Now, I'm just curious about the dynamics and I think just trying to discuss it with my love interests would be a decent start. The main thing I do respect is if my crush is already seeing someone then I guess I keep myself from chasing after her. I think I just need to read the body language a little better and see if I can relate to her being compatible with me and then just asking to hang out or something. I guess I don't really care if she's not interested or busy being in love with someone else, and I'm not going to get hurt by it or feel stupid if something wrong happens in the process. One of my buddies is really apprehensive and unsure, I think he just sticks with thinking about all the negatives and potential ugly things that could happen and then just avoids contact. I guess everyone is responsible for setting his or her own path and humbling the self.

Kudos to the Little Guy

Last night, I went to a big party hosted at an airport with some friends. After browsing around and sampling the free delicious food and treats along with the awesome coffee (mmm, so good), we headed towards outside. Along the way, I observed a really small guy whose even shorter than me and he's actually Caucasian! I saw he had big smiles on his face and didn't look that worried about anything but had a look of tremendous confidence. It looked like he was dating a pretty tall woman who was blonde and seemed pretty curvy. Wow, he was also carrying on a conversation or it so seemed like with another couple.

I was really pleased underneath to feel like how that's a sense of accomplishment for the little guy. It makes me wonder how it would be like to date a woman whose a little taller than me. I'm starting to not really care if the girl wears high heels and stands taller than me now, even if she would be shorter than me without them. I'm pretty confident about listening to the woman and not fretting about my personal height issue underneath now. This is such an amazing turn of events for me! I'm so confident and enlightened that I don't even bother to worry about not dating so many really pretty anymore. I just don't see that looks really matter that much to me now. She might still be pretty cute overall, but the appearance isn't such a big deal to me anymore.

I don't care what's on the outside now- I would rather be with someone beautiful on the inside and also is concerned about her health and would be pretty dilligent and be positive about maintaining it if she's not doing so well at the moment. This aspect in a woman who has some health issues such as obesity is a very attractive quality to me.

Trading Update

I'm finding out that I'm only opting to spend about 10-15 minutes reviewing ideas that appeal to me on the Forex market. I think I'm becoming more of an independent trader now, which is pretty cool on top of being able to read a bit faster and more comfortably than I used to. I can see why reading is a very useful skill that everyone should really develop and utilize for someone to go wherever he or she wants to.

Therefore, it seems like a lot of free stuff are out there to put together like a cooking recipe. For once, I'm going to try my hand at actually cooking! I'm a guy so I'm very bad at cooking or that's what I'm already assuming, but nonetheless it's just an analogy that I'm applying to playing with the Forex market. It's like I'm a chef in this market who is preparing his own recipe to make lots of money!

My daily charts that I am now adding are just supplementary adds on top of my primary 4 hour charts which I'm starting to love utilizing. I'm not particularly paying attention to any proper timing of the market- as long as I'm making some pips then that's all I care about! These charts are mainly being used with the major pairs to catch any potentially long term trends but I'm sticking to my 1 to 2 risk reward ratio; I'm basically now an active swing trader and can't go back to day trading. It's just not something I want to do anymore; I'd rather play video games if I had all that free time instead of looking at the market all day.

Feeling Shortsighted

It was really hard for me in college because I was so discouraged by a lot of things. Basically, I looked at everything like how I had only one shot and that if I missed then everything was over for me and there was no way of clawing back up. It was like looking up to perfection as my number one goal. I wanted to look for something that was always a win-win situation where I would never have to suffer a loss.

When I failed to meet these agendas, I became pretty weird and I was so distraught underneath but hell-bent on getting something done with my life. From the occasional shutting down moments and the sure-fire moments of feeling I was on top, these were the days where my life felt like it had its ups and downs.

From the moment I chose to not give into my anger as impetus to the people who were giving me trouble at a church, normally I would have and then they would cease to do anything bad to me, but then I would have remained the same weird person for even longer periods of time; I put myself in the right path of looking at it in the big picture. Now, I don't really take falls much to heart anymore; I'm ready to make peace with my maker already but then again, I'm about working hard to make a living and live a pretty straight forward life while driven to pretty cool and good things in life.

Hanging Out With Females

It's been pretty rare for me to schedule something with a girl. This female is a pretty close friend of mine so I don't mind hanging out with her right after Christmas. She's pretty excited about where we're going, and I told her that it's sponsored by my company. I was interested in pretending we were dating just to see how badly my parents would react. I guess not this time, it's just hanging out.

Actually the first girls I really had a crush on ended up being my Facebook friends. I never really did anything with them but I did talk to them and they were my classmates. It's pretty funny that one of them ended up sitting right in back of me, and boy, I was frustrated with her sometimes and even hurt her feelings. I guess that's the pains of growing up. 

I've been asked out by a girl and ended up hanging out with her but no real magical chemistry happened between the both of us. It was cool though. The first girl who I actually can say I officially dated ended up being one of those rare girls you could only hope to end up with. I guess I consider myself lucky that I had the opportunity to involve myself in it. After all of my physical infirmities from feeling so insecure and unhappy about myself, I see that I was courageous enough to do some feasible normal things with a few girls. Now it's like, I don't care if I'm rejected and I'm just going to straight forward with the women I'm interested in; I guess I'm all grown up now in this area of my life.  

Profit In Forex

The green at the bottom of the screen means that I reached my expected profit level. I ended up with 7 wins that doubled my stop loss so would mean a 4% increase of profit for each trade I made and 3 losses for a loss of two 2% each. Overall, it would hypothetically mean a 22% growth of my balance. My target goal is averaging 20% of growth each month in my account.

I am still testing out the waters and figuring out the kinks of my preferred methods of trading and looking into what these tools could offer me. So far, it's looked pretty promising for me. I have dropped down the third chart to a 30 minute and just look for a moving average crossover to confirm a decent push or rally. I think the third chart is the least meaningful for me but I paid a lot of money for those, so I'm going to stick with it and learn how to use it to maximize my profit. It's pretty much like my security blanket I'm always going to take with me wherever I go in my Forex trading career.

I'm pretty excited about making trades everyday and still this is just a demo account. I'm just enjoying how to be a profitable trader and do it consistently. I am now incorporating trailing stops permanently to my trading repertoire.

Dating Update

Okay, I got close but no cigar this time. Well, the good thing is that I don't seem to really care and won't ever be frustrated. I'm just going to go for searching someone who has plenty of time and seems to be pretty cool with everything about me. I guess it's a little hard because I try to hold back on some things that might make me look really bad.

Before I go out dating, I want to make sure that my heart is totally in the right direction and my mind and body are at the place. While in the process of just looking at things and feeling a little sad over finding some close calls, I'm going to continue improving my physique and economic status. What would be more of a blessing for me would be to find a girl with the right personality type for me and someone who has some similarities with me to be at least a good friend to hang out with. I think my needs are to pretty much have a diverse amount of friends, and I guess I desire to hang out with some cool and unique females right now because I haven't really done that in awhile.

Pretty Simple Approach

I'm going to make this one a post for the guys who are hardhearted and don't care about being rejected. It's basically to just be straight forward and direct and just keep on asking the girls you are interested in for whatever purpose you have in mind. Obviously, I would prefer the guy start with just hanging out and getting to know the pretty girl before everything else.

By being direct and taking an honest approach in an morally appropriate situation, women don't seem to mind just being straight forward back and telling me the reason for being busy very bluntly. Maybe, they don't want to get involved with it, but they are not going to express it right away from trying to be nice. I guess the guy does have an advantage with being able to still lead the conversation in anyway he wants it to take it.

I guess it comes down to how sensitive the guy is and how concerned he is about being rejected by a very beautiful girl. I think one of my friends is concerned about becoming dependent on a girl and getting into doing some madness and controlled by the girl while she's practically so hot. He's also sort of concerned about the girl he wants to be with not liking him at all and never having any more chances. I think he prefers to just dream about the ideal situations rather than trying to pursue it in the real world. Therefore, it makes it hard for me to convince him to change up his game in a positive direction- he's acting like a runaway and cute puppy sitting on the sidelines. I'm probably going to start laughing at him though when he makes rude complaints behind people's back or puts me down from my own efforts because I understand his occasional frustration.

My Way of Competing For Attention

The way I have been scoring dates with pretty attractive women is not even realizing that they are very pretty in the beginning of my interactions with them. Others might find them so pretty but I find their inner beauty is what draws me to them and I seem to be able to find flaws about them in their physical appearance, so it was hard for me to be comfortable about any girl's appearance for me. It's like the perfect appearance isn't there, so now I'm just naturally connecting to the woman's personality.

From what a well-sought after womanizer and lover would say, he mentioned that beauty isn't found in the skin but from having this exuberant confidence in personal body image. I guess you would rather be in love with a person whose really confident and knows what she's about and doesn't make too much of a fuss about how she appears with her partner to others.  

Trying To Get Married

I guess I'm a pretty laid back person and now not afraid of feeling sad about liking a girl whose going to with another nice guy. Even if the guy is pretty abusive and makes me feel mad about the unfairness of how I could treat her better, it seems like I don't have any diseases underneath me to overreact like crazy and in fury. I'm still just going to be friends with her, I hope and see her around.

Being sensitive about these inner issues and things that I have never grown out of has made me realize that I'm still putting up a personal fight to continue living happily. I think the best part of life is learning to compensate and living happily.

Finding A Female Friend

I'm just writing this post because I remember calling up all my female buddies on my phone. I only have about twenty female numbers. I made calls to all of them and even managed to talk to some of them about hanging out. I guess some of them are really cool and the others well, I guess you might need a little more time to think about them.

Basically, something important is coming up and I'm trying to get out of the event because the excuse comes from having a family member attend the event. Since I have a little sister, I tried calling all of them up to pretend to my sister or girlfriend. The cool part is that I scored a little better than the average guy would, and I actually did find a willing person. She must actually be a really nice person or maybe she wants to come across as that type of person- I don't fully know.

Anyway, I told my little sis that I found a replacement for her and she pretty much justified that it would weird for any girl to reject my circumstance and proposition. That is pretty cool! I think I should come up with more of those to put myself on the map of just hanging out with cool females.

Keeping Some Life In Perspective

It seems like the most important things for me in my life is to be a giving person. Currently, I'm trying to buy my sister something pretty expensive and nice for her. Also, for my cousin I'm taking it pretty seriously in helping him acquire some tools to help advance his personal interests and career. Maybe, it's because they are family and I've come to know them that I have also come to have a significant amount of care for them to want to make serving their interests one of my major priorities.

I'm noticing that the women I try to contact are becoming pretty straight forward with me and actually pretty open about what's going on in their life. This is pretty nice because even though I don't really care that much, I can actually see that they are human even though other women I have known claim that girls are just crazy individuals!

I've had some metamorphosis in my life because I seriously don't care about a woman's appearance that much as I do with mine. The only thing that sometimes gets to me consciously but still doesn't really hinder me from socializing is being short. I personally do associate being tall as a wonderful thing, but my body is so compact and strong looking that it seems like I can still intimidate some individuals. It's been an interesting realization of how looks can really be deceiving when fitting in personal interests. Yet, I'm seeing the bigger picture and it seems like a good number of attractive females don't mind me being short or better yet, it seems like they feel a little more elevated about themselves with the defined confidence I display socially.

Keeping Things Real

Sometimes, I feel really well connected with what I'm about to put on this site at other times like right now, I don't know what I'm necessarily digging myself into. Yet, I'm sort of treating this blog like a chore for me in that I'm just using it as a personal tool to encourage myself to be a better person. I remember maybe last year, I kept on writing that I was going to rewording the same thing over and over again which probably made me lose some repeat visitors. The funny thing for me is that I'm not really receiving any complaints or encouragement from other people in the world for my artistic direction.

When I am straight forward, it seems like I just get to voice my opinion very comfortably without anyone really bugging me about it or siding with me. I think people in general have depressing issues underneath that they try to resolve but can't really fully make something about it. I'm learning that anyone can be possessed with pride also, even Special Ed. students and that they can make all these boisterous statements about themselves while feeling great, even if it annoys others. In a way, it's showing off while being personally deceived about what the person actually is.

I'm just glad the guy whose been joking about how great he is in life while lying at the same time that he isn't joking, has finally mentioned that he knows he isn't the best. I told him a story which totally contradicts his beliefs and he came to believe it. He's sort of chauvinistic and so with my direct approach with telling this story about how a small woman successfully fulfilled a man's role made him so flabbergasted that he couldn't block it out as truth.

Trying To Forget Less

Right now, I'm not really writing that much because I think I'm a little rusty with my eloquence and feel little lost with my direction. I guess creating a dependable routine for myself might actually be beneficial for me. This is something that I am going to need to try.

I'm just kicking back right now and have so many side entertaining goals in mind, but I seem to be pushing them off to side while being in favor of bigger priorities. The cool thing is that I seem to laugh a lot about my own audacity these days and seem to be very peaceful inwardly about it.

Writing Less

My mind doesn't really feel so active right now, and it's probably because I'm putting my mind on other things that I supposedly would want to do. Right now, I'm finding that I have a lot of time and that it feels like extended hours into my weekend. It's pretty nice, but at the same time it sort of does make sense for me.

I wonder if there's any club for me to join on Monday mornings because it seems like that's when I'm the most wide awake and available to do things. It's like at the beginning of the week, I'm charged up to begin something.

Trying To Hang Out More

I guess writing on this blog has helped me develop plenty of confidence when it comes to texting women. The funny part is that I feel like a girl when I am writing to them now. I just feel like the transition that is taking place feels really feminine for some reason- I guess I try to adapt into their level of speech and sort of understand what they are trying to convey.

The fun part about it is that there's no need to feel so anti-social through being nervous about something. I guess when that part of you comes out and others sort of sense that insecurity then it's going to mean to them that something is wrong with you and then they might just ban you from their life!

Letting Myself Walk Favorably

I guess one of my strengths is being very literal about things in my thinking. I now see what it means to stretch my mind a little bit and see things a bit more artistically. I guess having been taught by a woman how to do this when I was in high school probably means that she was pretty crazy.

I'm planning stuff in my head all the time and trying to balance myself in a happier direction. I think it's just in my hormones or something to be a really active person. I remember just sitting there watching T.V. shows a lot of people thought were so great and just feeling depressed. I then would work out hard and feel like it was killing me but then from after having done it for awhile; I felt pretty good about physically improving myself. It feels pretty good in general for me to maintain my health. I don't think women are looking for muscles in a man, their great height, or money even though women might claim those things- I think women are looking for worthy men they see fit to be loving, attentive, and kind to them.

These worthy men have some characteristics that attract certain beautiful women in general. I guess if the woman is beautiful on the inside as well then it might help for her to pair up with a worthy guy.

Becoming More Stable

I think an example where I wasn't so stable was when my friend's twin brother was trying to really annoy me with irrelevant things. With him being so full of it and filthy about communicating his desires, I can understand his exaggeration of his personal self-worth. I guess it's an accomplishment if a person can be always happy about himself while selling himself much to creating annoyances in others. I am just straight up with him now, and I don't care if he says something meaningless and laughs while intending it to be something to make fun of me with. I think he has his own way of thinking and wanting to influence others even if it means abusing them. I already know he's never really been that smart, and I think he's just trying to be concerned about issues with his messed up heart.

I think it's natural for others to have some anger and nagging issues to cope with. The hard part is being able to labor and be a pretty normal and happy person.

Directness

I'm feeling that if I write very direct things on this blog now then maybe I will be screwing myself over. I'll just be open about the things that I think make me look good and isn't really showing off. I have some good friends where I'm just completely honest about myself, and they seem to understand me so I guess I have some place where I belong. I don't really want to be open when I'm not feeling emotionally strong about something.

I guess this whole incident about being involved in some drama at this church I have been talking about and where they ended up throwing me out of there is just too funny. I think I'm at the point of growing up and even though I still feel a little discomfort at times with myself, I guess I can manage it and handle myself decently. I think for a guy being able to handle himself well and be pretty successful at something is pretty favorable at winning a beautiful girl's heart.

Pretty Sweet Plans

I plan on mastering the Forex market my style, just like that song Gangnam Style does it just that I'm not going to be a poser. It's taking awhile and it's really fun to me now. That's what it's about- it's about earning a living while having fun with something you enjoy. Once I get it down, it's going to be so much fun for me and with the riches I plan on investing in some homes and doing a little real estate. Yeah, it's going to be pretty sweet.

It also seems like I'm an heir to my dad's company where my dad is playing the role of CEO and is an owner. My oldest cousins are also in the business and have a share of the ownership as well. It's a pretty prolific business and if it gets passed down to me, I plan on keeping it a family oriented business where it's about making some serious cash! On top of treating the workers like family, I would expect them to put in the work to make money. It's all about making money with this business, and I'm really enjoying the field. I just started out with my dad's company, and I will see where it leads to later for me.

I pretty much am going to try to spend time with working out and picking up my parent's native language. I am becoming more keen of the time I use, even though I slip up occasionally and focus on naughty things. These are some addicting behaviors for me, and I'm noticing that it's really more of a waste of time for me and something I shouldn't put my whole thought into anymore. I'm just going to try to stick to what's appealing for me. It's getting there for me in developing a really healthy, happy, and productive lifestyle. I seriously don't care about being rejected by beautiful women anymore either even though I'll make an effort to just stay friends with them.

Going For What's Appealing

So far with having gone after all the appealing things in life and willing to put up with the hassles and hard work to get them, it's been overall a pretty happy and smooth ride for me. I know that we are all designed differently and have a lot of variations with our flavors and preferences. Some are more appealing in others; whereas, not so much in others. 

What I'm finding that works a lot is basically making a commitment and holding on to personal values with something. There's a reason why we connect with something and treasure it so much. It's how we were born- just doing something that doesn't really fit in with what we're naturally happy and suited for doing won't be so productive and meaningful in life.

I mean don't we all just want to live a really satisfying life and enjoy good times with one another, especially with our spouses, kids, and friends? I'm going to be open about my testimony- going after the appealing things to me while sticking really close to my faith in God and applying all of the absolute Biblical concepts after receiving these principles from examining them in an unbiased format has been filling a void in my life and making my life more meaningful to live for and something I wouldn't mind sacrificing if it's my time to go from having made peace and finding personal joy. 

Swing Trading Upgrade

Click on photo to enlarge

I am now trading on the 4H chart because the day chart just takes too long for me to get a signal and I prefer to be in trades a little more aggressively. I am looking to ride the high and low swings of the week based off of only doing technical analysis. It's been a challenge but it's getting there with the tools finally adding up.

I'm using three charts totaling 52 indicators, which is all visual aids to pump out just one appropriate trade! I have added on a neat commentary and price action indicator which pretty much gives me palatable trades if it is within the channel that my indicator draws automatically. I'm now just lining up a good trade using all of these charts now.

I might be averaging one or two trades a week with each currency I trade. I am testing out this strategy in a demo account using 26 different pairs! That is plenty of opportunities to test my theories before I decide to narrow in on the more profitable ones and start playing with real money. I am just keeping this simple- buying low and selling high, sticking to the main trend, and riding a channel using price action. All of these indicators match up nicely with each other in confluence which is what makes my chart unique. I'm using three instead of just one chart to make my trades!

Happy Thanksgiving

I guess Thanksgiving is all over and it's going to be Black Friday tomorrow. I have heard of DVD's and blue ray discs being really cheap with the pricing being 3.99 and 8.99 respectively. It is a pretty good deal, so I might go pick some up for laughs. Actually, I don't plan on really buying anything tomorrow. I guess I don't really care too much about buying stuff anymore. 

My mind is now starting to see the pointless things that I could endlessly get myself into. I do not want to get into that anymore. I see how addicting the behavior is but it's so pointless to even think about getting myself into so might as well just suffer day in and day out when I'm by myself. This is only if I can remember to keep this type of discipline for myself going. 

I honestly don't really care that I'm short now. I really don't care at all. I don't how it really got to this, but it doesn't matter to me anymore because my cousins and relatives all came out normal. I'm thinking that my genes might actually come out normal even though I'm a little shorter than everybody else in my family. I guess my kids might come out normal or if they care about their appearance like I did while growing up, I'll make them appreciate more important things and to have confidence in who they are and to compensate in a really healthy manner that wouldn't even make their appearance be a factor to the people who matter the most to them. Now, I'm starting to see that my insides are not really caring about what's on my outside except being clean, healthy, and presentable in appearance. 

Brute Force Method

This is a pretty simple game plan that I have in finding a proper wife. It's basically to just ask directly the woman who I'm interested in after getting to know her a little and letting her know a little about me. If she says she's busy, has a boyfriend already, or is not interested then it's something for me to not worry about. I don't care about rejection anymore- I'm just going after what's appealing now, and I'm going to get over it really well.

I still intend on staying friends with the girls I'm really interested in, so I guess it will help me know a little more about myself and what I'm really into and how I tick. The hard part is that sometimes I might have an interest in a woman right off the bat, but feel like something is holding me back or maybe, the next day I might not really be that interested in her anymore.

There's one girl who I can say that I have maintained a good level of interest. At least I can say that we're pretty good friends and she's pretty cool! It's been really beneficial because she has been pretty open about her life and what she's been up to. I guess my values are to mainly be committed and a loving type of person- it's something that's part of my core belief system; I don't think I'm too much different from a pretty average person whose into getting along with others.

Refraining Myself

Some things that I want to work on is pretty much refraining myself from doing some things that I know are selfish and bad. Maybe my heart is going to get so worked up from not understanding anything and just try to give into some type of pleasure without thinking about the consequences. In these moments, I want to stay strong now and not give into them. I want to do the right thing, and it's just in my desire to do so now and something I'm going to have to labor in so that I could make it happen.

Basically, I think it starts with the mind and then works down to the heart. It's like a constant battle but once harmony is reached then I think that's where the fun begins. It's like these ideas are coming from something I'm inspired by and by constantly writing like this, I'm eventually going to have to look into more the subject that influences me and start writing about it.

Remembering Important Things

Sometimes its so easy to get caught up in the moment and forget about some priorities. I guess I haven't really been mindful of things with my own personal goals and aspirations that much. I would like to be a little more focused and relaxed at the same time now. I'm not really too worried about my general nature now. I understand where it's rooted in and with the areas that I have preferences of communicating with.

I'm starting to brainstorm something. I think I'm supposed to be the guy that gives chase and that since I can see where opportunity would arise, I should just go after what's appealing to me even if I'm feeling uncomfortable about something. Pretty much what I really want to stand for is my background of sticking to my most important values which have been heavily influenced through my belief in God. If I get rejected, then there's really no reason for me to continuously putter around anyway; I'll be getting over it, so might as well get on the move with it.

Mixing Desire and Hardwork

Having used to be a pretty studious kid, I remember the joys of bringing home straight A's on my report card  and then showing it to my mom and dad. For the way that I was with being this really chubby and short kid, I was not really seen upon as that bad of a person- in fact, I was voted as the most nicest person in my own class. I was a little psyched out because one of my friends made fun of me and paired me up with a nice Japanese girl- I'm guessing she's probably grown up to be a really attractive female but no boy who hated cooties would ever think about the big picture and with growing up.

 I'm just reminded of being brought to smiles now. I became really crazy during my puberty and reached a pretty scary and depressing moment in my life. I guess it was a really defeated feeling and with like no purpose in my life. I didn't understand the direction that I was supposed to be heading and really fully couldn't turn my attention or trust anybody for a certain point of my life. Despite this delicate moment of being really discouraged and relenting about things in my life, I managed to find personal redemption and to grow out of it. It was pretty much a stage in my life where I could have used a wonderful mentor, but my mind was so finicky and complex at the time, it was probably never going to have settled down anyway.

Leading By Example

I have to admit that I am a very faulty person and if someone copied exactly the way I am, I would be a little disappointed in him or her.  I see that it's going to have to be a work in progress for me. While I'm contemplating on what I'm doing wrong sometimes, it's hard for me to move on with something. It's taking quite a bit of painful effort in making it happen.

The best part is that I'm willing to accept my roles and feelings now and to exceed with what others expect me to fulfill. Inwardly, I feel like life just keeps on going and that we all have our appointment with meeting our maker someday. I am striving to not live such a disappointing life now- I want to live a great and pleasing one.

Now I see the differences with the things I put my time into. Initially, things may start out rough but if I can manage to hang on or get back into the mood again then I have likely a better chance of reconciling with my negative feelings of productivity and to remain pretty satisfied. I think we live in a world where hypocrisy and craziness is sometimes considerably the norm. I would like to get a little better with reading other people's body language now in general- it's actually a lot easier for me to see it when things are directed at my attention, so I guess I don't really pay attention when it's not really that meaningful; I guess it would be fun to do this effortlessly. Basically, I was forgetting to mention that I'm addicted to some things while knowing it's not good for my overall productivity or career now. Since I see this now, I am willing to accept my fate of having to deal with those crazy withdrawal symptoms and focus on something I think is really worthwhile, even though it might be so hard and feel meaningless to do. I think that is the secret to success for myself, which is dealing with this factor and making better time commitments.

I am ready to utilize this and pretty much prioritize no matter how plain and dull the situation can get. I'm pretty much going to focus on becoming more focused these coming days now.

My View On Online Poker

Poker is a game where people play against each other and either put together a profitable strategy or just play in hopes of getting lucky. The problem I see with poker is that the greatest poker players can sometimes take a hit on their finances and then swing back and forth dealing with wealth.   I'm not really comfortable with having a large draw down. I would rather be able to make profits consistently and be able to have time to do other things.

I'm not really so worried about making as much as possible anymore. I would rather earn enough to live comfortably now. I see that it's coming along gradually for me now.

Understanding the Self

The person inside of me is pretty messed up, and I realize it. These days I'm learning to compensate for how messed up of a person I am. I guess now that I know quite a bit of things, I can make considerations of what my actual desires are and then try to go after them. It's sometimes a pain for me in that I go over some things that have already happened in my head and wonder how I would have done better if I played out the event differently. I guess it's the part that can get a little aggravating and something I mope about slightly inwardly.

I'm no longer getting that longing feeling of changing back the clock. It's time for me to keep moving forward and make peace with those moments where things just that didn't go as planned.

Dangers of Not Being Straight Forward

No matter how inappropriate it feels sometimes to be fully honest about an issue, if it isn't done then the situation could get worse. Under the terms of being actual friends, there's really no need to feel so nervous about something you don't want to be uncovered. All these feelings of getting hurt by someone you once trusted can be really hard to resolve and to also reestablish something meaningful again.

It really comes down to the will and the intentions of the heart. Some hearts are just plain selfish and uncaring about others; whereas others will try to put forth an effort in doing good for this world. There's also in between which therefore creates a variety of hearts in the world we live in. Having to function together to live peaceably in a society can actually be a really good thing.

No matter how scary it's been for me from the moment I started to open up, it's been a wild ride and I've been reaping the benefits from being able to see things more under my nose lately then I've ever had been able to do. It's like I can anticipate how someone who I'm interacting with me is going to feel about me personally, and how I could take measures to collaborate on things that I desire with the person.

Not Taking Things So Personally

I've been starting to do what a female friend has told me growing up. I'm getting the same responses from some of these female friends in that it's actually positive in that I've learned so many lessons over the past three years and am now stable on the inside. I've even managed debating against an Atheist online who is an absolute stranger without either of us losing our cool. I even laughed at some of his comments which were meant to scorn Christians. Oh well, I can see that he's a doubter so hopefully, he'll be pretty serious about challenging the evidence on Christianity and finding out for himself the actual incriminating evidence that proves his suspicions. The reason for saying this is because mostly the ones who go all the way with trying to disprove the existence of God actually end up becoming believers.

A show on The Simpsons had an episode where Homer practically became a genius at the IQ of around 110 after removing a crayon that got stuck on his brain. Because of his new gifted intelligence, he ended up coming up with the actual proof of no existence of God in a matter of minutes and gave it to his Christian neighbor Flanders. Flanders read the proof and went "Yup" and then ended up burning the paper with a lighter. I know it's just a joke because the world will probably never get to see it as long as civilization is running.

Getting More Used To Things

Obviously, I've been looking up just a little online about short men because I am short. I actually read or watched some videos that made fun of short people, and I actually didn't care what I was discerning and laughed. I guess if a person of any appearance or whatever situation he or she gets put into has a pretty general stability inwardly then it's not really going to be a problem.

I find that from just being straight forward and sticking to it and just not worrying about getting rejected, then I appear that I'm handling myself really well with others. I guess for myself I find it a little funny to be a short person, but it doesn't keep me from engaging in friendly conversations with others. It's really cool how I managed to put it all together for myself now.

Forex Trading

I've learned that in Forex trading, it's really about competing with fellow traders and earning their money that they have in the market. On top of the big international and multi-billionaire banks playing in this field, I guess it can get really intimidating for most people. Without knowing what you are getting yourself into, I'm sure it's easy to naturally blow out your whole account.

Therefore, I'm just running demo accounts right now and working with some systems that suit my desires of how I want to trade. I've learned that my preference is to be really be more of a swing trader rather than a day trader or position trader. The difference in these types of traders is pretty much the duration of time spent on keeping a trade. By being a swing trader, I'm relying on big reversal trends so that I can ride with the right direction for up to a few weeks. This allows me to avoid competing for fast cash against other traders who are really out to grab a quick profit (day traders) and follow the big guys who are setting the overall direction (banks and governments).

I'm constantly updating myself on new developments with the Forex market. With these new ideas that keep popping out, I really rely on other fellow traders who don't mind giving their input. For myself, I'm being a little sneaky right now with what I have going and it's just a matter of time before I get to reach the cusp of greatness and have a chance to mentor others later.

Recovering From Cold

My head feels pretty shaken up right now and is aching while wanting to feel little dizzy. It must be that I'm still a little bit too exhausted. I slept about seven hours which is pretty decent amount, but I guess a cold virus that I'm dealing with right now has me feeling otherwise. Anyhow, I still need to go in for work which is a ten hour shift- it's a pretty long time but getting the work done and receiving a paycheck feels just about good as any good day.

I have yet to explore areas where I have been really nervous about figuring in the past. For instance, I've been really too shy and nervous to talk to most women and try to get to know them especially the really beautiful ones. I guess I had this feeling of thinking I was too unworthy to be with such a great person. Maybe, it's just all relative and something I need to discover for myself in the type of person I am. I think I have the bravery that I need now to be friends with attractive females and to start going after a decent relationship. I think it would be a little better to be able to have a female partner whose my best friend at the same time and to really spend some compassionate, quality time together.

Understanding the Times

I guess this is just a random post in response to the readers who have came on this blog and started reading my posts. Well, first of all, I just want to thank all of you for having made your way here and entertaining yourself or just doing something on here momentarily if it's by accident.

I feel really compelled these days to hold back on some things now. I guess it's just a matter of discomfort for me to reveal something and then later have to stress myself to fix the issue if it didn't go according to plan. For awhile, I was really about just telling the truth while being pretty mad underneath about some things. Now, I'm about saying things in both truth and love.

Picking Things Back Up

It's really come to a point in my life where by feeling the pursuit of something, I don't really feel alone anymore. For myself, I'm learning to just grasp patience and be really stable underneath. By having an eye for these sort of things, I think I can seriously see the bigger picture on a larger scale for myself.

I guess I've been really busy with earning money at work and creating a living with something that I'm really interested in doing. It's really taking a lot of time but with the hours that I spend on working on it, it really feels meaningful to me. I no longer really purpose in myself to watch T.V. or play video games that much anymore. I used to be really big on those things but not anymore.

Making Some Interesting Progress

Looks like I had to take a very long drive to pick up some sausages for my friends' birthday party tonight. Oh well! Living in a nice suburbia of Orange County, I had drive quite a ways to pick up some reputable sausages for a female friend who just loves sausages! I've been doing this for a couple years now and even though I don't fully understand her love of some fancy sausages, I guess I don't mind buying them while going for a pretty long, stale drive. They are pretty expensive too, and I ended up buying a whole party's worth which ended up all going to the birthday girl herself.

This is also the first time I actually kissed a female other than my mom on the cheek. There were moments where I feigned it like with my annoying little sister and older neighbor. Oh man, my little sister really hates me when I try to mess around with doing gross and loving things like that with her. I felt it was actually appropriate because it seems like she's a really good friend now and someone who I could trust if my life really depended on it.

I've been fortunate over the last couple months to engage in plenty of text messaging with some female colleagues. Man, it's made me very comfortable in engaging a decent conversation with attractive females without going ballistic and feel like blowing up over being nervous. I tried a funny pick up line at the party with a girl when she was talking to another guy who was roaming around trying to flirt with as many girls as possible. It ended up working and before I left, she let me know that liked me! Yes, I'm starting to get somewhere with this whole initiating a date and relating to her thing.

Updating Situation

Looks like for this month, I feel like bombing this blog because I really don't feel like I'm in the season for writing a lot. Nonetheless, I've been busy coming up with newer developments and keeping myself busy. For some reason, I've been stuck at the piano playing tunes that I love replaying over and over again for hours for my enjoyment. I guess I don't care that I make mistakes now at the piano because I really enjoy hearing rhythmic sound and to just be in the moment feeling like I'm partying underneath.

I'm realizing that my experience with finding a life partner is getting more enriched by mainly being stable emotionally. It's like I'm running into sensing those little details now but not minding so much about it in others. For myself, I like to believe that there are always greater fish in the sea to go after. If the woman I like purposes in her heart to reject me then even though I may be a little sad, it still doesn't bug me that much because I could anticipate in finding a more beautiful lady to marry.

Upgrading Forex Trading

Looks like I've had some trouble trading with only using the daily charts. I really do enjoy spotting signals on the daily, but it seems like I'm jumping in a little too late with possibly an unadvantageous stop loss; therefore, I'm now looking for entry points using the 4 hour chart. I also have some automated chart pattern recognition and support/resistance going on now which is making me feel like getting a bigger edge on the market.

I pretty much have the chart pattern recognition set up on the 1 hour frame because the software can only update itself every five times the amount of respected time, or in other words every five hours. It's turning out to be quite fun learning how to be successful in this market. I'm aiming for spending roughly ten minutes a day on average to become my new occupation and then spending my time doing a lot of personal things I want to endeavor myself in doing.

Just going back and forth while running demo accounts has pretty much protected me from going broke. It's been pretty much a lot of personal testing of what works best with my own personal style of trading. Again, I have to stress that there's no such thing as winning 100% of the time, otherwise everybody who willed themselves in this market would be millionaires and have only perfect principles to apply each time. Therefore, my trading ideas might not be suitable for someone else, so the best I see it is to go after advice that appeals to you the most and test it out yourself.

Blog Is Peaking

I've been a little unhealthy this past weekend. I guess I have a lot of private issues that seem pretty natural to deal with just like everybody else does. I think it would be really inappropriate for me to talk about the things that make me tick in a bad way because if little kids are reading this, then I think it would mean something bad afterwards. Okay, so some of the things where I was really releasing my negative energy over something I didn't understand- I think those posts are okay.

My blog has reached only 600 views this month which is the largest amount of views ever for this blog! Man, I don't know how this blog has amassed 600 reads for a month after over six years but I guess it's something I don't really mind. I can say that I'm a writer because there's somebody in this world reading this piece of art or junk. I may not be the greatest writer in the world, but at least I try to imitate like one every once in awhile.

I'm seriously going to try once again with the love of God in my life and personal sorrows to end my personal sins that are keeping me from being ideally happy. I think I'm just lacking some serious conviction in my life because I haven't been reading the Bible or attending church in awhile. After the incident of that church kicking me out over questioning if I liked some of the ladies who attended there, I haven't been the same dedicated believer for awhile. It really created a spiritual funk in me. It's a good thing I realize the things that were bothering me and now I know how to go about it.

Oh well, I value friendships with everyone good and bad a lot but looks like if I can't manage them all then I might as well go for succeeding in my life and going after bigger things in life instead of just standing put with something. I think it's all just a matter of being in the mood now. It's really sick that I understand some things a little better now and possibly I should trust some of my senses when dealing with people.

Atheist Mantras

Just now, I looked up an interesting post of Atheist mantras on IMDB after being slightly appalled over Kirk Cameron's Hollywood box office history. Not to mention, Kirk Cameron does seemingly have a really attractive wife and six children so there must be definitely some fun involved with their relationship. One of these days for me man, even if I don't ever get there. It seems like I'm just naturally a pretty funny guy who gets heavily agitated when angry but still tries to stay friendly with everybody while under it. It must be a scary thing to some people while being a guy and really small Asian dude. More and more, I'm getting used to being shorter than the average American and accepting the personal sadness from wanting to be taller. Overall, it just shouldn't really matter to a man or bother him in general. 

I've noticed that most Atheist's way of thinking can be likened onto a mature Christian's way of thinking too. For myself, I've actually stuck with trying to be a Christian since second grade and after being exposed to different walks of life and philosophies and other religions all the way through a Bachelor's degree with over 250 units; I can sort of see some major differences between an Atheist and Christian. I'm just going to highlight some of the mantras I saw from that post which was interesting to me:

"Being an atheist means you don't have to think of yourself as a sinful wretch who can never do anything right. "

The Bible pretty much says that nobody is perfect. I've asked random people all my life if they think they are perfect, and they all say that they aren't even though I've heard one say that he is perfect in another area. Yeah, you can be strong in one area and be weak in another; I don't know if it's just natural DNA or something but that's how a human life rolls. 

"Being an atheist means you don't have to throw yourself down in agony and beg some terrible cosmic dictator for forgiveness for being the way he created you to be."

The Bible pretty much says that God is a loving person. The Bible says that God is broken up into three persons and are still one. This can still be logically monotheistic because God being omnipotent would be able to do anything impossible like having three persons make up one person. Like water can be gas, liquid, or solid; another one I heard, a person could wear three different hats and be still the same person such as being an engineer, mathematician, and loving husband/father. These three persons of God in the Bible all love the same person which is everyone in the world, even if a human is consistently sinning. Some people are caught in a cycle of addiction and can't get out of it because some disorder happened, so yeah, if there is a God who can deliver people out of addictions, why not let it be the God we read about in the Bible?  

"Being an atheist means that when you're sick or hurt, you trust in doctors and hospitals, which actually work, not faith healing and prayer, which don't."

It's pretty clear that in the Bible, medical doctors would be a god send to the people. If they are there then why not utilize them because God cares for us and why wouldn't God of the Bible not allow people to have access to immediate medical attention? Also, prayer is used as taught in the Bible to help dispel worries and aid in a peaceable state of mind. 

"Being an atheist means you don't believe in eternal life, or resurrection, or reincarnation, or any other conceit that cheapens the value of the all-too-brief time we have on earth."

Christians believe in a God incarnate which is the Son of God who was sent to this world to be crucified for our sins, dead, and buried in a tomb. After three days, Jesus would be resurrected and reach out to 500 witnesses who allegedly testified to see the same thing. In the court of law, 500 witnesses agreeing to the same detail would be classified as substantial evidence. It's hard enough to get two witnesses to collaborate on scheming with the same details, but if done right the courts will convict!  

"Being an atheist means you lack belief in all gods, all religions and all supernatural entities alike."

Christians believe in the one true almighty God who is three persons in one. The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. The Bible lays out the well-known 10 Commandments and first one says to worship the true God and not other idols. This also is stated in context with the Bible that those idols are not alive and will not assist in actual help in times of personal crisis and desperate measures except provide false hope. 

Not Really That In Trouble

After achieving extreme stability inwardly, I now see that the incidents people were getting so uncomfortable about is not really my fault. I sort of see it beyond now and can pretty much laugh about the issue inwardly, while supposedly causing some people to feel like they're going to be embarrassed by me. I guess that's a really horrible feeling to live on a daily basis so it would be sort of easy to form a small grudge against me then.

On top of those people not really knowing me, I'm sensing that it's really about letting myself out there to them and just accepting any decision they want to make even if it's mean. I sort of feel if they're very unpleasant then they're lives are going to be sort of messed up anyway and that I shouldn't really put too much effort than I already tried. As long as I gave a decent effort of putting myself out there with my wonderful intentions, if they can't receive it very well then it's pretty much time to part from them and move on to bigger waters.

It's sort of the fun part in engaging these people and can get really dangerous, but fortunately, I don't deal with extreme people all the time. I just deal with people who just hit a bad funk in their road and those who just found a certain path of satisfaction in their life and now are feeling dissatisfied because they can't handle their own personal emotions from being offended about something silly.

I've learned a really important aspect that I have now personally gained. It's pretty much about being emotionally stable underneath and then attacking the point of conflict of interest with the person in truth and love. If they don't want to talk about it, then I see that the favor belongs to me already. If they stop saying anything, then it comes down to me really making a choice of whether I want to keep them around or not now, and I'm going to have to choose very wisely and examine their behavior from a distant but personal stance with them and then go from there.

Turning It Around

I remember looking into some of those religious people's faces over an incident that was really personal. I could remember Christopher's face as he looked into my eyes with this angry and disturbed look like he knew what was up and then told me that the girl I was questioning on whether I liked or not was praying for me to turn it around. These are some really funny and awkward moments to recall now.

It's really all about finding the right balance and the good people who can help you get there along with taking a personal journey pretty seriously. It's nice to feel relaxed most of the time though and to enjoy the presence of being among friends, wife, and kids. Yeah, I know the whole world would come to a pretty universal agreement that how this church conducted with me was wrong! It's so whacked out of proportion that it would even be easy to laugh about now. Whether friend or foe, nice or pretty dumb acquaintances, it's pretty dog gone clear that you're not supposed to take something to the next level when it just regards questioning personal feelings related to entering a relationship and sort of wanting to avoid it.

It's pretty crazy that religious people who call themselves a know-it-all would start trying to pound on me mentally or emotionally just because I was contending with personal feelings on some women who I was just trying to come to terms with. It's weird that they forced me to participate in some game they thought would mean the end of the reign of their church, if I would fail them. Hey, I'm honored that I got in trouble by religious people just because I was personally debating to myself whether I liked some girls or not.

 

Balancing Trades

Because of the volatility in the trading markets, there is no such thing as a 100% accurate system. This means that without proper training and analysis of the charts, one could be in for a huge loss in one trade or even lose everything in one load. It's pretty much reality, and I think that's the major reason why most people feel it's too risky to even dream of being so rich from playing the stocks- it's like probably winning the lottery or something.

Fortunately, there are consistent winners in the market and these professionals seriously know what they are doing. I'm finding out to become an average trader who profits in these markets, one needs to invest about two years practicing successful trading methods to finally get a working knowledge. The trader has to be fully dedicated and is pretty much the only person who is going to figure out what works best.

Basically, I'm finding that exiting trades is just as important as entering trades. It's really a game that's all about proper timing and playing with the highs and lows of the market. What I found helps so much is learning how to work with candlesticks. I pretty much have a fully comprehensive system that works just for me now- it's probably not going to be satisfying for others but for myself, I really like how far I've come and how profitable it could be for me and ensure a pretty decent life that I've been longing to live. It's really all in the discipline and sticking to it.

What I look for is pretty much harmonic or Fibonacci patterns, breakouts of support and resistance, chart patterns, candlestick formations, the beginning of highs and lows, scalping opportunities, price action, and crossovers with moving averages. Before getting into these good trading opportunities, I look for pretty much the highest probability ones because I would rather wait for a high probability one than gamble and enough volatility in the market. Because of my swing trading habits, I'm starting to not worry so much about the spreads of a currency anymore and the news also. Because I work higher time frames and insist on keeping trades for longer periods, I would rather have better technical analysis rather than looking at the news. I just let the candlesticks run the show which is probably what reflects price action the best.

Finally, a major consideration to make is picking the right broker. I really don't like market makers because they trade against you, despite their occasional offers of lower spreads and better execution times. I pick to work with non-dealing brokers because they actually are pretty friendly with wanting traders to win in the market. They make a small commission off of placing trades with them; therefore, the more money you make, the more trades you make, and the more money they make. They even accommodate traders with decent tools to even have a better edge in the market. I would rather stick with those brokers rather than trading against them because they can screw you over with their big bank roll in the market.

Trading Update

I have pretty much upgraded my list of tools that I use. When it comes to trading, it really comes down to learning how to be a successful trader and there are many building blocks that need to take place before it can happen. Along with it being incredibly risky in the beginning, getting into the field of trading currency can be very intimidating. Let alone, 90% of new traders end up losing more money than they gain which is something to think about.

I've pretty much stuck to having my account managed by a pretty successful trader and did end up profiting but I wasn't fully happy with the result. Therefore, on and off, I kept on figuring out new methods to game this system and I've finally come up with a pretty accurate depiction recently. 

The major factors to look out for is placing proper stop loss with decent money management, trading with a trend, and recognizing systematic patterns that become lucrative. The tools I have acquired do a lot of the automated recognition for me because I don't really have the skill to do so; therefore, I rely on some reliable tools to generate findings for me. The next step would be for me to set the proper stop loss and confirm a strong signal. I've turned into a swing / position trader after being a day trader for quite some time; it was really taxing on my full time work schedule, but I really do enjoy this possibility of building residual income and just managing trades only minutes per day.