Normally, I would like to bring along a friend to feel like I have a security blanket while being around new people. I guess the objective would be to connect with strangers, so maybe I can leave out my best friends and introduce the new friends to more of my good friends later on as I grow more comfortable with them. Overall, it's pretty fun and I guess there's nothing to be ashamed of with just going out there to meet friendly people.
I guess my asexual partner is sort of classified to be like my girlfriend even though I consider it to be an open friendship and how she's like a sister to me. I still like her though since it's fun to go places and do something with her when our schedules align. I'm pretty much just trying to chill with her whenever I get the chance now. She does feel a little uneasy sometimes around me though, but might be from struggling with her natural symptoms that makes her suffer a little social anxiety. I'm there to be supportive best as I can, while I still go around looking for my dream girl!
My open relationship status allows me to loosely interpret that I can pick up on Magic the Gathering again with my loser high school buddy. He really set me off too many times from not showing good table manners when we dueled each other in that game. I think he's really immature still and I don't have an issue explaining my problem to him now. I can just be chill now since I've been understanding my negative emotions better. I told him that I will let him know once I have my new deck ready. I haven't put in any time for it in the mean time!
So basically, I have my faith in Jesus and the big things to carry out for me everyday and then the little things that would be nice if I did them and lastly, everything else. The only big part of me that I have on hold is finding my dream girl, since I'm at a lost right now and want to build my confidence which is a nice little thing to me. The big thing is really just trying to making a lot of money right now while doing what I want to do which is playing poker and swing trading. I'm trying to motivate myself to practice programming, but I'm feeling this uneasiness still right now even though I know that I like solving those problems. Regardless, programming is still a big part of my life that I consider to be a blessing. I'm just taking my time to factor it in now and figuring out my routine that fits like a perfect puzzle piece.
