I'm now realizing that I am putting into effort with trying to make money with something I find so much fun. It's crazy with how the thought of working on improving my programming skills is going for me. I guess I'm just frozen stiff about it or continuously procrastinating. It could be that I'm not looking very into being stressed out.
It's so weird because I sort of have to push myself to work on programming a little bit and then once I get going, it feels pretty good when I finish the work. I think I'm just a junkie looking to have that joy fill up in my life consistently, and I only get it once I finish programming something and it works perfectly. In the meantime with getting there, I have to put in some willpower. This is like the same thing for me with working out.
I don't feel like working out daily, but when I go do it, it feels so good once I finish. It's probably the hassle of warming up my engine figuratively speaking that I'm not having a lot of fun with. Maybe it's supposed to be like this because you have to understand some pains and struggles to know what ultimate glory feels like.
I've been just trying to feel like having a lot of fun to go work out and do some programming, but I'm not. I'm not doing it consistently enough right now. At the moment, it feels like I'll put in about once a week or something like that, but I do want to take advantage of all this downtime I'm getting at work, once I finish what feels like my programming chores or helping out another work department.
For the time being, I'm having fun practicing with making myself a better Poker player and being a swing trader. I don't have any money on it right now, but it's fun for me to do on a daily basis without putting much thought into it. I guess this would be my natural job then which is sitting at the computer and competing at a zero sum game to take other people's money. I grew up as a gamer and enjoyed dueling other players and even trying to always win tournaments, which I never did. Maybe this is why I don't have much problems with playing a common man's game to win some big money. I used to feel guilty for the longest time, but now I realize it's just one of my natural desires that I have grown up.
Programming and working out are pretty much things I do while having to push myself into it so I can enjoy the finish. I'm still a junkie for earning ultimate satisfaction! It's just that it's going to require understanding how I'm going to have to grind for awhile sometimes to get there, so might as well prevent myself from tensing up and take my time since I'm not taking any classes anymore that truly count! I'm really looking forward to the day I start getting it together and make a run at making some money by programming cool apps for cellphones.
