Weirdness

It might be funny to talk about or just something that grosses people out in general. I'm not going to hold it in any longer. What's so great about this blog is how I can treat like how I'm exposing myself to everybody out there and maintain my true persona at the same time. It's really quite neat to have this format of being very open about my life, but at the same time trying to be decent as possible. It's not easy to even dream of writing like this for some people, so it would probably be even too hard to do but for some reason, it's been flowing naturally for me lately. I have even found that I feel more confident and intelligent with how I talk in my social outings.

Sticking closely to the truth and being about hard work has made it possible for me to be happy even though I haven't found my sexy mate yet. I know she's around, but I can't gauge how selfish I get to be when it comes to the thought of getting some intimate pleasure. I know that I want to be happy with being married to one lady at a time; to put it bluntly, there shouldn't be any divorce unless there's adultery or some physical abuse issues. I would like to marry a Christian, so that way I know we're on the same page with this whole commitment thing and it's about pleasing God. If the spouse gets widowed then yes, the Bible allows getting married again. I think I had one widow interested in my online Christian dating profile, but I never responded back!

Occasionally, I have been getting Christian ladies hitting me up from their online profile. I think they want happiness and are open to all of that physical intimacy in a good marriage. I'm not sure if I'm comfortable about it though because it feels like my parents influenced my upbringing and I'm not happy with it either. It's tough but one of my main incentives is that I want to enjoy a ton of intimate pleasure mutually with the lady I'm married too and very often for a pretty good duration without having to worry about the signal for any future pregnancies. Watching some fantasized videos that are about heavily induced pleasure from performers, I fantasize about wanting a lot of that action in marriage! I need someone compatible to share and mutually love this physical intimate pleasure. I think those performers are dirty for not being married, and I don't blame them because it seems like they feel guilty for getting that much pleasure. This view I have isn't sinful but what I have been watching totally is and I don't support the implied messages while laughing about its silliness and letting it feed my fantasy. I guess then yeah, a lot of people are into doing this as well. It's really hard because my heart is trying to close the gap by justifying a gray area dealing with abiding by the Lord's spirit. I'm sure I won't have any problems with this once I'm married to the right lady. In the meantime, I'm going to need to have more fun by making friends with more nice ladies until I'm able to be introduced to a good catch who is available and will be so happy to help fulfill this sexy dream!