There's an area I don't really want to talk about because I feel it's inappropriate. I think talking about my past mistakes in dealing with angry women might be also cutting it close to that area too, but overall; it's not nearly that bad because the outcome wasn't serious on my end. I'm basically overall a lucky guy who had enough self-control and continued to work on himself so it would actually be refreshing for me to talk about it and relish the details.
I still have some work to do on this area and it's finding sexual fulfillment. It's a funny thing to write about and such a hot topic! My biggest rule for me is that I'm not paying for a prostitute no matter how much the going gets tough for me or prideful I'm feeling about my personal abilities. I'm also saving it for marriage! This is such a hard challenge and stressful at times for me. It's interesting how having low self-esteem or sometimes too much can cause a person to act out with something very stupid and find justification for it. For example, if a person is having a really rough day then he might go to a bar to drink and try to pick up women and maybe risk getting unwanted pregnancy or even a venereal disease. The terrible consequences are real and can happen just like that to someone you know. The same could go for just wanting to have fun and from feeling like you could take on anything.
Maybe it's not really a bad thing to talk about and if parents find out about this site and they don't want their children reading what's on here then it's on them to take some action. What I have been doing which I don't feel proud of is trying to hold in my microscopic guys while edging to videos that focus on rough sex. I have done it for up to an hour and then I can't hold any longer! It's something I have been doing from being stupid and having no answer to not having a wife to enjoy some of that with. Focusing on pleasing the lady and working hard at it is what helps hold those microscopic guys in! I'm just saying if some men can derive pleasure out of this. It's obviously wrong to fornicate in real life, so I do not advocate it. I guess people especially ladies might get the wrong idea that I'm trying to convey here. The truth is that sex in real life might not be that exciting as those videos so I might be shooting myself in the foot here for maintaining this practice.
I guess reading up on positions to please the lady because I want to be so good at this, and finally coming across some simple material with common sense; I won't be able to get there from just edging to heterosexual material. I really might have to accept some things here and find more happiness in other areas that can lead to sex! I think my cure to this is just willingly find the truth and then accept it while continuing to write about it on here.
Academy of Scrappy Credible Undergraduate Desire
