Living in Motion

Today, I feel that life will keep on moving forward and that there is no reason to feel ashamed of being part of life. With these incidences of people trying to be clever with you and change you into some person you are uncomfortable about, I sometimes really need to speak up when that happens. It's wonderful to keep a smile on your face and to reflect how life is sometimes meant to be naturally filled with some discomforts. To have this sense of being wronged and trapped, it really can give off a person's level of maturity.

I think I'm finally in a mental state of awareness with no more confusion and emotional perturbations. I mean my eyes or body will still feel agitated or burned up at times, but all of that passes away through taking care of the body. I don't think I really need to blame anyone for anything bad happening to me. At times, I really feel tempted to boil up and then I tell myself that I am not going to communicate anything bad with them and just let it rip. To place myself in some of these awkward situations, I sometimes feel some pressure but I think it's good to self-manage a range of emotions and not get so caught up all the time.

My Postive Spirtiual Reflection

There are about so many things we could do to keep ourselves excited. When a person feels down and out, I realize that there are genuine people out there who can truly care for you. It is not just one person soaking in all the love and attention. It pretty much requires both sides to have this great model of unconditional love for each other. If this falls into place and with Jesus having conquered our sins and living in true repentance under his spirit, we find ourselves growing in fruitful fellowships.

It is highly difficult to sometimes gauge what is right and wrong. Some of us may feel this discomfort zone that causes a lot of calamity. I think individuals do influence us, and it would be a great thing to be a wonderful influence to others. The Bible states that God called all believers to repentance and to fellowship under a roof at a assembly, such as a home fellowship and a church.

I myself am definitely not perfect at everything and God says that it's through the blood of Jesus that we have been cleansed of all our unrighteous conduct. Furthermore, God blesses us with the Holy Spirit to convict us of our sins. The Lord has showed me a road where I can focus a lot more on self-control and to be reminded of how great God is through others communicating what the Lord has done for them. No matter how little or too wide, God is still in control and He truly blesses us with everything that we need in abundance.

Group-related Respectful Values

I believe that a person may sometimes have a difficult time in understanding others' point of views. For example, I think a major conflict that some people like to feel is that a person fails to respect the other person's rights by doing something they disapprove of. In the circle of friendships, I think we all have our own different tastes and differences. By not wanting to come to terms with some of these things, it surely sometimes leaves room for outbursts or frustrations from a person who is trying to put up with it.

One of the major issues that I feel is that we sometimes may not closely look at how many times the offense happened, the time intervals that it occurs in, and end up weighing our own preferences over the individual as the de facto standard because we feel the need to change them to what makes us feel happy. It can even be bunched up into an agreement of a small group, and they may see upon it as being totally right! In a way, I think if we are not careful about accepting others' weaknesses and their way of going about it, it can surely cause tension for both sides or be disastrous for one side in the end.

I believe that collisions with other people are bound to happen with the more people we interact with. It is inevitable that conflict may be felt by someone by placing a sensitive insinuation that may feel edgy to her. Depending on the person, he or she may feel a necessity of becoming defensive or just going along with the crowd. I think arguing for the sake of self-defense about something the accused person did not do is a really difficult situation to be dealt with for the poor lad. It would take a lot of thinking, but basically what makes sense for me is to try to continue exercising self-control or living for the Lord. Letting it be known through communication is pretty much a difficult obstacle to overcome.

Timing is a Virtue

I don't think God created us to deprive ourselves of our basic necessities. People can feed you from left and right on how to live, but ultimately our conscious efforts belong to ourselves. Life is definitely a huge deal for mostly everybody. Whether guys on the market shop for food or we see people scrambling to pay off their loans, the world is a small bubble that's indefinitely loved by a spiritual being better than ourselves.

Our current inhibitions whether proudly great or small, sometimes have to be dealt with. Without needing to resort to uncivilized tactics, we can maintain our lives by being committed to loving people regardless of their preferences, background, ethnicity, or sins. This is what God is all about. He places concern on man, and long before Christ rose from the dead, God was still there for us.

I'm currently living in the golden age, and I'm supposedly in the best period of my life. Perhaps, others may not want to fancy in doing some of my physically challenging activities. I know that perseverance with a good clean attitude and repentant heart will help us find the fulfillment we are looking for. Focus needs to be on the right things because investing in these options create a more stronger foundation. Perhaps, confidence and not having resentment while being disappointed with still the greatest efforts of living for Christ creates a happy person! Let's worship in Spirit and absolute truth with the Word of God by our side.

We have an awesome God.

The Lord is super amazing. Many things happen in our lives, and I'm coming to realize that I have complained to God all out of vanity. The Apostle Paul stresses about having a renewed mind and regenerated heart in the New Testament. Philippians 4:8 says "Finally, brothers, whatever things are true, whatever things are honest, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things." (KJV) I just keep bringing up that verse for some reason. I don't think it is necessarily commenting on being ignorant to sensitive issues. I don't really think that Christians are striving to be dopey people.

Sitting around has its major losses. Just think of how God could use you in this struggling world. A lot of my friends who try to be prideful talk about giving back to the world and how everyone should believe a certain way. Instead of criticizing others, we should move our hearts in the direction of actively loving others. We may be just one person at the end of the day, but God has a bigger and brighter future for believers. We can look forward to the coming of Jesus who will bring forth a glorious and marvelous kingdom. Revelations 21:4 says "And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away." Revelations 7:16 says "They shall hunger no more, neither thirst any more; neither shall the sun light on them, nor any heat."

I know that a lot of people doubt the Bible being the truth. I've heard some tell me that it is a wonderful story passed on for generations- that it's been etched onto the minds of decent people. Living out in truth is sometimes uncomfortable. We are born from a mother and have the right to not let anyone overshadow us into thinking how another should think. We have our minds to make up about this whole Jesus phenomenon. The choice is yours. Romans 10:9 says that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.

Part 2 to last post

The last post seemed a little choppy, but basically what I want to do is "Go up to them and be like hey, and rip a smile about the whole situation." I'm getting pretty down to the wire and writing about stuff that I was uncomfortable about has taught me a lot of perseverance and to be a wonderful example in how I'm supposed to be. I think the sharing part has been a little shaky with interesting responses, but I'm willing to accept their feelings because that's a part of who I am. I like to bring peace instead of leading destruction with notions that they bring and stir up trials.

Communication, the right way!

I'm sort of sensing a great way of communicating is to not minimize a person's feelings. It could appear selfish sometimes to basically try to shut them up, get what you want, and then go out. I think time is a great way of telling where a person is at. I guess in life people may sometimes want to gang up on you and then force you out of there. It could be an annoying experience, especially if you did not intend on anything bad happening. To keep out frustrations for the petitioner's side, I think he or she basically needs to be ready to accept what may come his or her way. A technique that I have yet to try is to maximize their feelings in the plane of the offense, tell them a reason, and then give them time to ponder about it. Like here's an example, a girl goes up to another estranged woman and says "You told me that you made your personal decision already based on being uncomfortable with your personal preferences. You have not yet given your specifics about how I might have violated you. Are you feeling reproached with me asking you about it?"

It's so important to not lose it even if it feels unfair with the majority in opposition. The majority is pretty much hawk-eying you all the way. It takes a little skill but basically keeping yourself under control and asking about how they accept you without downplaying their feelings. I'm currently not trying to reveal my feelings about it at all, but trying to look at things vicariously. The results are turning out to favor me in the role of character. You could also entrust a person to open some doors. If you been mad about your social life so long, by trying this I know that it can help you mature and come to apply some good humor with them. You will also come to terms with yourself and how others will treat you. A weaker method that has some results is to just keep on apologizing, but it feels bad to apologize about how you feel that you are a wonderful person. I would not suggest taking that route of selling out, but keep apologies in mind because someone may end up surprising with astonishing abasement.

Reflecting on Others' Feelings

I am realizing that I have a lot to learn about people. I know that it causes some to be a little testy about my comfort zones sometimes. To be stretching myself far and trying to apply things in a loving manner, I realize that I have so many flaws and that I could lose so much focus for myself. As I am gaining more grounds and becoming more emotionally secure, I need to be careful about being too reckless about others' feelings.

Life in solitude has meant the worst of times for me sometimes. Perhaps, it results from a part of my moral culpability where I try to be the initiator or aggressor sometimes in dealing with situations but end up nowhere. I'm starting to gain a lot of confidence for some reason and feel acceptance for any response, even in the form of expressionless facial appearance, with the other party I end up trying to communicate with. It's just so important to not to lose it, while expressing self-control and unconditional love for her! Sometimes the man needs to suck up the discomforts in life and aim for leading the woman in the greatest direction that's reasonable even if she's not his type.

Renew Thyself

A lot of things sometimes happen to me, and it's like I want to protect my own interests by not conveying them. It has been a little difficult for me to find the right and meaningful path with the best approach and to also feel confident about it. Currently, I am realizing that there is a place for me and it's only going to get stronger as I find it hard to contain within myself! The inspiration coming from how Christ lived is inexplicable to me.

I know that I have several faults in me that I cannot seem to fix. These sins of mine would never have been so apparent if was not for the Lord convicting me of my prideful and erring ways. One of the most difficult worries I have is a person taking advantage of me. It is really something I need to pray about and to allow God to fix. I know I am a work in progress and that in time, as I let Jesus finish the work created in me; I should be the person that I want to be who is pleasing the Lord. Without the Bible, I would not have anything to go by. The Bible is definitely more than a piece of literature to me; it's the word of God. It is simply not about what I feel at the moment when I am reading it- it is about living through acknowledging what Christ truly meant through the Scriptures.

Thanks for being there God

I think being confrontational can sometimes appear controversial. Whether it's emotional or not, a decision needs to be made on how one wants to go about it no matter how disillusioned others may feel about his or her claims. My whole life seems to be centered on some rules that I have adopted in trying to be considerate for others. It's really important for me to keep a clear mind that wants to be accepting of other people's weaknesses. I know that I'm weak but loving people is like one of the greatest attributes a person can have. The way Christ went about it while he walked on Earth is so remarkable that I am inclined to being emphatic to his ways when emotional challenges resurface.

I think it's really important for a person to be a great peacekeeper. I guess calling someone an idiot or trying to push her away because she does not fit your boat may not be the greatest expression of love. When we let our pride get in the way, it sometimes gives us reason to end up disregarding other people's feelings. It's not a really good thing to express in my opinion, like that's the only thing in your life worth contending with. I think we all possess enough heart to have the capacity to receive the Lord into our lives and to allow him to direct our dealings with conflict. Emotions are a very strong medium and to lose oneself to it while being angry could be devastating to one's health.

Fresh Thinking

I think a lot of my perspectives have been about learning to change to the point of understanding where I need to be at right now. Sometimes, it feels like dramatic things happen in my life but I just don't want to let others know about it. To communicate my thoughts and feelings while in the mood for gossip just sounds so childish for me. I realize my own behaviors have limitations now and that I am not that good enough on my own.

Having adjusted emotionally has taken a lot of toll in my life. I do still have different desires that have not been met yet. The personal preferences in my life are about giving it all up for the Lord. I don't really need to feel uncomfortable always and try to run away with developing myself.

Small Excerpt about My Morning with God

Respecting a person sometimes really takes a lot of commitment. With values and schemes that occur in life, I believe that one would sometimes want to escape from life by finding selfish pleasure. It could be personal lusts, idolizing someone, or even found through self-incrimination. I think we sometimes get too carried away with ourselves and some of us may never want to come out of our own bubble.

Today, I briefly read through the passages in the Bible about Jepthah and Samson. These passages feel a little much about God condoning their foolishness because of how He cares for our own weaknesses. I can greatly see through the historical speculation of them both of how God had blessed them a great deal, but would still use it to stir up what others may find troubling. I think I am in a similar situation right now. It's amazing how unwarranting people about what I'm going to do, even if it was subsocial could cause a lot of grief and doubt to a people who really considers you a lot.

Let's keep this real

Life is good, no matter what happens because Jesus will always be there to forgive me for all my mistakes. I am ready to challenge others who challenge me. I have this moral obligation with people's feelings right now. They want to run my life the way they see as fit. Balancing these things with the feelings of others will take some time. I need to keep making mistakes with these small requests that they impose on me. The only way to find myself out is to go down trying and being myself. I believe in high values and standards, but I need to play a little dirty sometimes in a high moral fashion.

Life feels so good

I think the best way for me to be a blessing right now is to carry people's burdens in a loving way and to be very productive in the things I am doing. The reason for my thinking is that I think I'm starting to voice out a lot of my emotions in a way where people can sort of be led into. This is happening through my writings. I can always find excuses if people don't like how I have been soul searching and maybe then, I'll be able enliven something wonderful.

The way that I can be productive and a blessing to others is to read books proficiently and also study. A very important decision to me is to continue in fellowship with Christ, who is found in the traditional Bible. It's also to do things that are ultra-cool right now; such as skydiving, biking long distances, cliff-diving, rock-climbing, working out, raising a million bucks legally and with interesting tactics, etc. I could sure use a couple more inches in height, too; nevertheless, it does not bother older folks. There are so many scary stuff you could try to get taller. I recommend consulting a physician about it, but many of them may be like "Who cares, you are a unique individual with genes that you carried from your parents." Regardless, just ask about the nutrition or medication and how dangerous the exercises could be. I grew a half-an-inch from getting enough sleep and trying some of those heart-pumping exercises. I should keep it up and not feel sorry for no reason because it does not involve anyone, but myself. Can't find the verse for this one, but it says, "If the barn needs painting, paint it."

Dealing With Wall From Friendly Girls

This passage is detailing my little active struggle of not trying to live out my past. I have actually woke up this year to a lot of different experiences. Specifically, I have a wall surrounding me around three intelligent girls. This is so cool in a way because I never thought I could be considered for even rejection in a relationship. I was working so hard at not trying to give myself away at being in a relationship with anyone. I have not asked any of those girls, if they wanted to get committed in some relationship. Pretty weird because my body used to be a little uncomfortable about listening to them.

Now that I have risen at a new level, I feel the need to pump out better results. I am a very straight man by the way. No hustling going on in the last sentences. There's a special girl who I truly admire out there. It's exciting that I have actually some real life conflict to anticipate. Others have even tried to get involved with me just allowing them to solicit me. Going back to the wall surrounded around these women, I feel like having the green light to go talk to them because of everything surrounding my ignorance to them. They sort of failed to clue me in about the conflict they were going through. A straight man who appears to have no experience in this area and changing his outlook in life all at the same time; probability: almost impossible. This is where my genius may resurface.

Gosh, my head was a little messed up.

The Lord has taught me something meaningful lately. It's really to cast all my concerns on Him. Recently, I have been squirming a little about pulling out all my hairs. Life is really something, and God placed us here on this world for a definite reason. It's wonderful that our personalities are all different and some of us just need others around to help us take a break. I guess that's why I really hate it when people start acting a little different around you. You just really want to break the ice and fix something they are not accustomed to you about.

I'm currently learning to adjust at becoming a hard-working and focused student. I think the winning takes place by multi-tasking my emotions and having faith in God that everything will be okay. It's just that sometimes, my soul is just so poked at that I have to go out and do some remedial things. I would really like a balanced and fresh life, but I do not want to leave behind something dealing with people. I am not quite ready to give up on a note of misunderstanding or discomfort with someone. I think a wonderful person is also someone who can create more work for him or her to be proactive and make a positive impact. I should honestly be doing that too. Instead of being so distracted, it's to work hard at dealing with it through the Lord's blessing.

Internal Personalities

It's a pretty well-worthy note of writing to receive comfort from the Lord. I currently am finding that being a guy with so much difficulty of not casting out annoyances is sort of hampering with my life. Everyone has their desires and ideas, and they like to think it's right with absolute certainty. It's just like me. They place it upon me and then annoy me! I think my gig has been to just keep asking questions and then demand answers. I don't want to jump into rash conclusions and then spill up somewhere. That's just my train of thought, I suppose.

God is a great friend to anyone who calls out to Him when circumstances are rock-bottom. Some people ignore the wonderful attributes of getting to know the Lord. I find that my personality has not been really used to staying annoyed with something and then letting go of it. You know, I really need to start pursuing after changes but keeping the Lord in mind. I don't really feel down on myself anymore.

Moving On for Better Days

I think we would all like to view life as having a meaning and purpose. Sometimes, some of us may want to make excuses with being a dummy and accepting it. The situations that God places me in is sometimes really hard to relate in others. In some part of our lives, I think sin takes its toll and may cloud the mind. It's important to stay fresh in the Lord and to repent from all bitterness and resentment. Phil 4:8 says, "Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things." (NASB)

I don't really want to share the things that I've been going through because of conflicts-of-interests. After I deal with the situation, I may have the luxury of laughing off a wonderful story. I really like delightful things that arise from confusion and frustrations. It feels like moving forward.

I will share that I'm out of my house a lot more because I'm pretty stuffed about staying indoors and doing things that I have been accustomed to. 1 Cor 13:11 says, "When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things." (NASB) It's in my heart to move away from my parents soon and live a really diligent life without having to rely on them for financial support. My mom just wishes me to marry off and have a job that people could look up to. Maybe, this is what my mom would think is best for me. This reminds me about the parable of the talents (Matt 25:14-30, Luke 19:12-28). By being diligent in work, it is natural to master the skill and then be blessed with more tasks for gaining added treasures. This means that I may have the skills in the future to really accomplish a big dream that I have. My dream is to give support for dying nations by doing something to help out- something that is not languish; possibly, lending financial support to virtuous and wonderful volunteers with a great vision I can follow.

I am currently studying to be a high level I.T. worker. The jobs in that field are very incredible and potentially fruitful. It may actually fit my niche of what I need to help maintain a balanced life. Giving my time to serving the Lord is also an area that I wish to grow in. I hope to be the guy who can really handle a lot of things that would normally pester individuals and to deal with them strongly and come away with pleasing God.

Public Apology to the Lord

God has the ability to liberate us under any circumstance that we may feel is hectic on us. The under-driven guilt of all my sins is ever consuming me like a drug. My fallen moments arise from lacking trust in myself at the given moment of not receiving what I desire. The Bible says in Proverbs 3:5, "Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding." (NASB) It's a very simple concept that requires us to pray consistently to Christ who reigns in heaven. Eph 6:18 says, "With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints," (NASB) and 1 Thes 5:17 says to "pray without ceasing" (NASB). It's difficult in all of us to give trust over to the Lord sometimes. We find that perhaps, life would be better if we proposed improvements on things we knew about. 1 Cor 1:27 says, "But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong" (NASB). We live our lives sometimes for pleasing only ourselves and find that it's a direction that leads away from the Lord.

Being a person with opinions, it's relatively hard to stay logical and if you are my sister, to never stop relying on your feelings. I have come to accept that my hard stubborness is only a defensive mechanism to excuse myself with being selfish. I don't need to add onto the Bible what it's saying, and only need to rely on God's grace. The Bible is a comprehensive manual of how to live and to manage with receiving the provisions of God.

To be of one mind with Christ, it takes commitment and self-discipline. I feel that others may want to impose that Christianity is a religion that labels a certain people and putting on a security blanket with no absolute proof of what they are believing. It worries me a little because Jesus is a real person who died on the cross. The case of how the tomb of Jesus became empty with two Roman soldiers standing watch should be convincing enough to be an intriguing case in history. Philosophical arguments are not needed in the case of the empty tomb. One just needs to put together all the pieces of what really happened in reference to the Jewish culture.

It's time for me to pray and feel like I'm jumping over countless hurdles until I can overcome the limitations with a blessing that I seek. Right now, it's about struggling without sex as a single man. God has called me to save my virginity for the woman he has allowed me to marry in the future. The marriage bed will be pure and a very joyful moment when that time comes. The end of the race will have its fruitful moment. Never too late to repent from a swinger's lifestyle or addiction to porn. It's been very evil of me to heighten my sexual desires for my own merit. I have to accept that I will have down times as a sexual creature. A new dawn is coming, and a new life has started and it's time to thank the Lord for this day! "Therefore if any man is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things are passed away; behold, new things have come." (2 Corinthians 5:17).

Random Fictionalized Story of Marc

Once upon a time, a person named Marc told a story while making funny faces. He gradually arose after that from the table he was sitting at and then started making belly aching noises. He was so filled with awe and misery at the same time because he found no acceptance with what he was doing. He then ended up withdrawing himself from the world. All he had with him was loving parents who gave him housing and food, and a very infuriated sister who could not get a load of him at times.

There are moments in Marc's life where Marc feels very depressed and lonely about not having enough friends around to give him support. Marc always wanted acceptance and felt like he had to work hard to receive it. One day Marc just felt like being annoying, according to some news sources and started messaging people with unclear sentences all around those e-mails. Marc just could not get enough of it and so he continued doing it some more. People have asked what the purpose was, but the best explanation has been stated that he loves to just write for the thrill of not knowing what words will be coming back to haunt him.

Marc has a big load of thoughts piling up in his life. In regards to how he could never get by without people, he just has to learn to deal with the annoyances of not knowing some things about people. Marc has recently given up looking at porno, watching television, and playing video games. He would rather do nothing instead of polluting his mind with indecent thoughts right now. Marc is starting to make the decision to repent for the sake of getting to know the Bible better and make more wonderful decisions. All of these annoyances with the self has been pretty much about a relentless attack to the unknown sphere about people. It has brought Marc a lot of confusion and nervousness. Writing a lot of confusing statements has made Marc even more sensitive about what people are actually thinking. He can sometimes state random things in his head and start laughing and then his mom would start scolding him for acting so wierd.

Marc eventually grew up with a nice head and wonderful personality. It is all thanks to the wonderful and loving Savior of this world. This committment to God has produced wonderful results and truthful experiences relating to the heart in all aspects of his life. There is a joy that can't be unfathomable when Marc fellowships with God by reading His Bible. He became very successful, earned a couple million dollars, and married a sweet and beautiful woman. They have raised ten children together and have hired their own children to help around the house. Marc and his wife, Francine can be found in their own daily radio talk show. They seem to really have wonderful chemistry on air and encouraged fans to seek after the Lord.

The problem circulating with Marc right now is that he wishes all who do know the true living Christ to give God a chance. Marc has this burden in his heart to want to serve God for the purposes of being an instrument that helps people get out of being deceived with a selfish world. He wishes to tell all of a wonderful loving Savior who wants to restore good values and heal the void in their lives. Marc has taken on a role to be a volunteer at his local community and also has formed an organization that helps people worldwide with common struggles by providing clear and practical Biblical solutions...

to be continued at a later date!

1 Samuel 4:12 - 1 Samuel 8

Today, I read these passages. I have not had time to read the Bible lately. I have a burden on my shoulders which is to be the very best that I can be when writing. A verse that I liked is 1 Samuel 6:6 which states, "Don't be stubborn and rebellious as Pharaoh and the Egyptians were. They wouldn't let Israel go until God had ravaged them with dreadful plagues." (NLT)

I believe the Holy Spirit to not to be just a coincidence. I think some are still saying that Christianity is a religion or a personal reflection of correcting oneself, rather than a true relationship with God. Because of being human, I think we sometimes get a little lost in life and leave out Christ. Christ came into this world as a human who interacted with real people. Of all the phenomenons out there, I believe this to be a greater marvel than anything else in the whole universe. Jesus made his mark by resurrecting and leaving behind an empty tomb. This case about Jesus when analyzed at a historical point creates a marvelous statement of how God could surely be real in this world.

For me, I need to try to be more patient with God. With all the privileges I have, I think I could live a well-balanced and Biblical centered life. Currently, I am being prayed for and all of a sudden, I'm starting to see where I need to flourish in necessity and desires. I am finding that I can find meaning right now as a pretty satisfied bachelor. I have found that living in God, every desire can be obtained with the right cause. If God takes away a desire, it is only meant for me to allow God to do it under my submission of His will. I will ultimately allow God to edify me through the washing of His word and to eventually take on greater responsibilities in the future. I think people are here to try to help us out, but ultimately the best advice I think I can receive is to solely rely on God's advice. To search it, we need an open and willing heart to love God with all our mind, heart, and soul and to have love for others, as well. We may feel abandoned sometimes, 1 Samuel 7:2 says "...During that time, all Israel mourned because it seemed that the Lord had abandoned them." (NLT) Suffering is sometimes painful, sorrowful, regretful, or even frustrating. I don't think I can be pleasing to everybody, but what I can do is listen to people's petitions with eagerness. At this point in time, I have to stay right in the Lord with the most obvious things about my private life. Yes, I have some sexual struggles but it's not nearly that bad which prevents me from making good friendships with women.

Talking and Writing

Things have been so different for me these days. I am trying with all my might to find the goodness achieved through our Lord and Savior. I see that putting our confidence in Jesus helps us to walk in our worst moments. To be growing in my faith, it has been an incredible challenge. I see myself as incapable of doing really anything, but I believe that God has called me to find harmony with others.

I don't really see everything at first glance. I believe that God does marvelous things to me when a person has something against me. It's amazing how words can really affect a person's emotions. God gave me this ability to work under my own pains to lead people to restore the way things were before. I used to do a lot of apologizing back then. I think that was the key because I did not know what was going on fully. I think through apologizing and placing agenda on my own needs with a person, I have not been able to grow in knowing the person better. I'm trying a more positive approach and finding it is going to take lots of effort to be considerate to the women affected by me. It's so easy to clarify good intentions by sticking with pure writing and talking as the actions. It's amazing how the least evil of things can make people angry. For example, writing with lack of clarity because I want to edify and worship the Lord through words. Brothers and sisters have told me I'm on the right path by communicating my desires with the Lord. I am ready to push ahead to greater things. Mainly the affected people are best to just clarify with the greatest purposes in mind.

Social Writing

I wanted to test my writing skills by seeing how well I can communicate with it. With the lack of people I have worked with, I have come across some problems. The problems associated with me are basically frustrations from not communicating effectively at a good level. The confidence factor in me is still pretty evident with others. I think I have pretty good intentions with writing and therefore, since no one really does this what I'm doing, it must be fairly unique. The people who wrong me are basically dealing with a pretty unique, but entirely normal person. I like the factor of being normal because it causes people to really later think about their mistakes and repent. I feel that people need me to communicate with them at face value.

I will seriously try my best to incorporate talks, but I truly like to hold the best for everyone. It's like the logic is starting to pop out of my writing so evidently. People are able to analyze it and ask questions to get even more richer details. It is so good for me to voice better reasons without trying to come across as a person in need of professional help. I believe that when I write I sometimes feel empowered with what I'm doing and so it gives the reader a reason to feel victimized about something. I need to dig in and ask better questions relating to myself. I think I'm dealing with people who are going through some difficult situations and need to adopt a talking manner of reaching out to them.

Progress In Jesus Makes Perfect

There's this problem with me being so deconstructive with myself. It can annoy a lot of people when they don't understand me. I am trying the best I can to be right with everyone. I can see that there are hidden meanings in the things I'm putting down. It's the way that I think that causes this person to not understand me in any way, shape, or form. I am being revealed the way to a successful journey- it's to communicate.

Things should mainly be about God's glory. There's a purpose behind every Christian's life in what the person is doing. Maybe God is leading to a certain direction or not. The answers will sooner or later be revealed. Let me not become a cheap person, but a person who has quality and ready to socialize and be in agreement with everyone who I feel wronged by.

Gen 42-45

I skipped yesterday's reading again. I must not be refraining a bit from feeling negative on myself. There's no need to skip having fellowship with the Lord, no matter how bad you feel about the situation. Ultimately, the blame would probably be stated as me having initially done something wrong to do the person. After I explain myself and the person sees that it was a bad thing to be mad at, then I think they may feel weird about it. Genesis 45:5 says, "Don't be angry with yourselves that you did this to me, for God did it." By being a man who fears God, it allows room for compassion upon those who have trespassed us. Joseph demonstrated this humility by showing love to his brothers, even though he was feeling he had all the right to be mad at them (Gen 42:25).

It's amazing how expressing deep love and aiding a person, despite them knowing they hurt you a lot, it creates a feeling of anger within their own flesh. It's like they did all this wrong to you, and you are not trying to. The principle of showing love after being wronged to a person who deliberated on it, is a timeless classic that forms a relationship with the enemy respecting the lover. I know this because my sister has deliberately hurt me by kicking and screaming so much about how she's unreasonably happy. I have talked to her about it, and when I had the chance to deride my sister, I sometimes chose not to, out of needing to be an adult.

I like how Jacob turned out to be a well-principled man as he mellowed out in the land of Cannan. His objective was to bless his enemy only to appease them for what he felt he was burdened with. His sons caused some turmoil with Jacob with the growing pains, and maybe one turned out to be a serial killer! Overall, Jacob did not always end up bickering about his problems and place pride over himself. His heart was finding ease while fearing the Lord. Gen 43:11 says "So their father, Jacob, finally said to them, 'If it can't be avoided, then at least do this. Fill your bags with the best products of the land. Take them to the man as gifts- balm, honey, spices, myrrh, pistachio nuts, and almonds.'"

Joseph also applied a test on their brothers to remind them what they put him through. By putting them in prison, he was implicitly stating that he suffered. In our walk, we don't always have to be confrontational in our actions through our struggles. I think it's really good to let them know what they did and in a good way. For me right now, it's about communication and not always dwelling in the past frustration. I think bringing it up to talk about it is as mature as one could be. Right now, I'm dealing with a lot of frustrations in insecure people. They seem to have this persona of being someone to rely on and then they assume I went through the motion of trying to write them off in secret. The frustration may be from feeling disrespected from not knowing what I have said to them. This is seriously a sign for me to communicate more with people and let them know what I was up to.

I think it's never over to let God forgive you when you have done someone seriously wrong. You don't have to be mad at yourself and end up punishing yourself. Allow God to walk into your heart and to bring you up in humble confidence. God's son offers to save us from the burning fires of hell. (John 3:16)

Gen 37-Gen 39, 1 Ch 2:3-8

I skipped over some more chapters from not reading yesterday. I need to make it a habit to read the Word daily. I am doing this because I want to be nourished in the Spirit and receive encouragement. I know that I am not that great of a writer and that I see lots of small problems right now. I am so sensitive about them right now, but I don't want to let God stop working in my life and help me to become a better person. The story takes place with Joseph who really becomes the favorite child (Gen 37:3) and a highly blessed man (Gen 39:6).

I can really apply some principles out of these passages right now. What I see is that Joseph remained humble before the Lord's eyes and did not commit treason with the Lord's commands. Psalms 18:30 says, "God's way is perfect. All the Lord's promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to Him for protection." (NLT) Joseph was a talented individual who was envied by others and pretty much had a higher calling. Genesis 39:3 says, "Potiphar noticed this and realized that Lord was with Joseph, giving him success in everything he did." (NLT) His brothers ended up selling Joseph into slavery. And then after having some success as Potiphar's favorite slave, Joseph would wind up in prison. Sometimes, bad things happen to good people for a reason. It's really hard to always understand why situations occur that causes some people to put negligence. I think it could be from them having lack of understanding with goodness.

What I like about Joseph is that he did what he could in all his might to avoid any sexual sins. Joseph was very diligent and possessed great leadership. These traits show me that God blessed Joseph with leadership. I myself find that I am weak and feeble-minded. I do not have great qualities of being a leader. I falter with my own physical appearances. Overall, after the day is gone the light of God's grace, love, and mercy still shines upon my life. 1 Cor 13 explains that pure love does not have jealous motives. Perhaps, my reasonings are so flawed that I cause people to stumble; or maybe, just the way I am causes people to get angered. I think God might have blessed us with certain callings. These callings enable us to desire God fully. I'm not saying that our passions are always the best thing to do. We can certainly try to ignore others, which displays our own selfishness. I believe this is what I'm getting when it deals with relations with others- it's to keep trying, cut out anger, maintain regard and respect, never feel down, in self-control and be reasonable while allowing Jesus in your life.

Gen 32-Gen 35

I skipped some passages over the weekend because I kept myself occupied. I then fell short from being away with the Word. I am starting to realize with the things that I treasure need to be based on God's desires. The story leaves off with Jacob running away from his jealous brother, Esau and living with his uncle Laban. Jacob ends up becoming his uncle's servant and then marries both of the daughters for his dedication. Jacob did possess more love for Rachel rather than Leah, Laban's eldest. I recall how it must have pained Leah with the lack of attention Jacob gave her at times. Rachel and Leah were sort of both competitive with each other in the aspect of bearing children for Jacob.

After becoming a wealthy man with traveling servants and flocks, Jacob left Laban to find his own land to settle in. Jacob faced this suspense of having to face his brother again, as the family traveled across land. It's important to me how Jacob showed a lot of humility. I think humility is an aspect of showing respect for an individual. Jacob also had so much fear of being killed that he was ready to appease his enemy. I think God really leaves His mark on us when we are in devastated moments and willing to do anything to avoid conflict while humbling ourselves. God truly admires a humble person. When fear settles in through the mistakes that had occurred, a really smart person will attempt to reconcile. So I believe reconciliation is not a bad thing in general and that there's no need to keep on avoiding. God will set up the appointment, and it's just a matter of not having resentment or conceitedness with the person you are offended by.

It appears that some of Jacob's sons may not have been closely brought up in the way of the Lord. When family gets so huge, I guess it's easy to just label a child as a son or daughter and ignore things about them. I think it's easy for us to sometimes get really frustrated about bad things happening to the ones we love and try to take revenge as a result. Through the bad things happening in the world, it's rather courageous to try to stand to reason instead of resorting to hatred and bloodshed. Even while the opportunity is available, we should try to consult the Lord first before engraving our own contempt on a person who wronged us. This is an area that I thought I was strong in, but I think my immaturity showed signs of still developing and causes people to block out their rudeness that they feel were insignificant. It's rather awkward feeling burdened down by others and trying to show your full appreciation for them. I have had moments of just becoming this pained creature giving out directions to stubborn people who won't change. It's like parenting in a way and being able to see it through prayer is allowing me to repent. It's also pretty weird because I can't seem to always remember that little detail people love about me, which helps me to lead them. I guess leading others has been a little stressful for me with the amount of patience I have had in the past. The lack of confidence and knowledge through the evils of this world indicate that people who have wronged me are training in foolish things and setting themselves up for failure.

Gen 25:27-Gen 28:5

Today, I read about the life of Issac and his sons Jacob and Esau. Jacob took on the favor of his mother, Rebekah; whereas, Esau had the favor of his dad, Issac because he brought home wild game. (Gen 25:28) Esau ends up giving up his birthright to Jacob. (Gen 25:33) It looked as if Esau focused on the things of the moment, as it is for me sometimes. By focusing on the "I'm suffering now part", it could look foolish to give up all that you treasure to the wrong entity. I guess Esau did not really have so much concern about his birthright, but rather wanted focus on the pleasures of the world. It appears that Esau plots to kill Jacob out of being mad that he does not have any family inheritance to enjoy for materialistic comforts. (Gen 27:41) Back then, it must have been pretty difficult access to have warm housing, food, workers, and sanitation without it being passed down to family.

Esau did marry some women who did not turn out to be a blessing for Issac. (Gen 26:35) Perhaps, it might have been for physical attraction that he chose to marry these Canaanite women. (Gen 26:34) Holding control of those hormones to stay pure is a real challenge for a lot of guys. The Bible suggests that believers should not marry a non-Christian. It is something about the bonding of the yoke thing. I recently heard about a well-brought up American falling for a man who is a part of radical Islam. One of the main reasons to not do this is because the head of the family should have total reverence for God. Family is the basic unit of growing in love and growing up well. If a spouse becomes a Christian later he or she can be a witness to the other spouse by being a blessing. God permits marriages for unbelieving couples, but it's been told that true happiness won't be found directly in the relationship. It has to come by the true cleansing flow of the Holy Spirit through our Lord and Savior, Jesus. Salvation through Christ is a concept that is not too difficult to pick up on. It's just a matter for all of us to want to call upon his name. A lot of people seem to argue that Christianity is this biased religion that offends others by placing unfair judgment on good men and women. They seem to want to argue about mainly contradictions. Nothing could be more false with the true nature of God. All the evil in this world is attributed to Satan. He alone said that there would be no peace and destruction if Jesus would worship him. Jesus knew that if he had done it then it would result in chaos at the end because one little sinful act- like one shot of cocaine, night of losing virginity, and getting drunk could result in a life of regretting some things.

Issac truly struggled with people back in the day. (Gen 26:14) It wasn't just a pleasant trip, but God had a place for him. I think it's intended for me find my place with God and to allow Him to transform me because I want to trust in God's Word. The day is coming for me to find overflowing riches in God's kingdom. Currently, I'm blessed to be able to live a certain wealthy life to be able to have fellowship with God. I do want to learn more eventually.

Gen 25:1-26, 1 Ch 1:28-33, 34

These passages describe the first offspring of Abraham. We are told here that Abraham married a new woman and bore kids, along with his concubines. (Gen 25:1, 6) I have heard the Jewish law did decree it as permissible for a man to have concubines back then. Nowadays, it's basically a man being with only one wife who mutually love each other. I think it's pretty fair for the girl who needs all the attention she can get from her best friend. Don't you think?

Issac, Abraham's son, ends up inheriting everything Abraham had (Gen 25:11). Gen 25:6 says, "But before he died, he gave gifts to the sons of his concubines and sent them off to the east, away from Issac." (NLT) What's really neat is that Abraham confessed his sin of sleeping with other women instead of his wife and prepared for Issac to respect his bride-to-be by sending his concubines packing. This conjecture is taken from Abraham's concubines never being mentioned again with Issac in the Bible and that possibly the children were so young that the mother had to follow. Abraham took careful consideration of his son, and this shows that he loved Issac very dearly. He must have felt awkward about sensing the children would tamper with Issac, as Sarah had blamed Abraham for not having a direct son with her and feeling ridiculed about it. We reach to the period of Issac bearing two sons with his wife, Rebekah- Jacob and Esau. Jacob would turn out to be such a stubborn mouse, whereas Esau is seen as this elusive guy who focuses on the flesh by what I think hardly having any fellowship with God. The faithful God predestines Jacob to be the greater twin, even though he is younger. (Gen 25:23) Back in the day, it was the oldest son who inherited all of the father's possessions. They were born like a minute apart, imagine how Jacob desired being the oldest but only by a couple inches off.

Ishmael, a son of Abraham's concubine, is believed to be the ancestor of the Arabs and possibly results in the Muslim religion. Abraham has cross-ties with Judaism, a belief of the Jews; Christians, and Muslims. They all see Abraham as the founding father. Therefore, this is one account of God wanting to work in our lives, but how so many opt to push themselves away from the Creator in heaven. Abraham missed his wife Sarah throughout his lifetime; it's evident by how he meticulously prepared her funeral. (Gen 25:11) Recently, the old-timer, reputed, great evangelist Billy Grahm lost his wife who died of old age. He publicly announced his grief. It's something about these men of God who really love their wives and treat them with kindness and have a great relationship with them. It's by the blood of Jesus that I am called to take on humble confidence and eventually lead a marriage, as I try to make it happen.

Genesis 21:8-21 - Gen 24:1-67 - Jan 7

I am not that great of a devotional guy. Neither am I that great of a writer, neither am I this person who you should always look up to for advise. I do realize that it's about getting the heart right with God and following His principles as closely as possible. By being in prayer, it allows God to help us live our lives in accordance to His will and to be satisfied with getting the gist of life.

What I recall from reading this passage is that it talks about Abraham who was so willing to sacrifice his son to serve his God. The act of submission and no intention of defying God is unbelievable. The Bible states that God would not test us according to what we cannot handle. It's amazing how the faith element needs to be regarded in Abraham's servant. He traveled so far and was so loyal to serving Abraham's interests. This must imply that Abraham treated all of his servants with love and kindness and also brought out the best in his workers by encouraging them. Abraham had straight access to God, who gave him a great reputation. Imagine how Rebekah must have felt when she was called upon by God to marry Abraham's son, Issac.

The privileges that God gives come through our reputable hearts. How we conduct ourselves in love has a lot of meaning. Say for instance, a girl did some harmless act of wanting to ignore this guy who does not act like he likes her that much. The guy could be extremely bothered by it or not. If he's bothered by it, then maybe he must be sensitive. Anyway, my point is that being a good influence has a very good and positive impact. I see how when you are left out of the circle, which I get myself into a lot, you really need to face your demons. I guess it's just a matter of asking and receiving a reply. I really don't mind anymore because I'm dealing with people who come to church and need to profess to the Bible's teaching. Otherwise, God will deal with them, even if you did all you could to prevent stuff from happening. I guess giving it your all and praying to God is the best way to ameliorate any situation dealing with a person. I think getting all my desires out of a person may take a little time and effort. Oh well, I have to live with how me being quiet that I'm seen as not being that comfortable around others and set apart.

Writing Through...

The powers that be are referring to God's ultimate grace. I know that I have a lot of problems inside of me that want to be released. My mom has told me that some people just work out to release this tension. I think it's a totally different time for me because I need to deal with these long term annoying issues. I just can't seem to let them get off my head, unless I separate from the person.

I just need to focus on what God is doing for me. It's going to be really difficult for me to figure out where I need to go. I have so many desires dealing with people, and now I am starting to get a little offended by being wronged. I think it's just a matter of doing the right thing, no matter what has been done. I think sometimes your best friends do not always come through for you because all you really have in the end is Jesus.

I'm going to write that I know the bad things of immature people or people I'm not really in good terms with. It's just a matter for me to do things smoothly and figure out the connection for each different person. It sucks that I have to deal with these headaches. I just wish that I could do whatever I wanted that would not land me in jail and receive all the blessings. I think I surely have a lot of things to repent of still. I am working hard and not allowing others to bring me down. I think in the end it's going to wind down to prayer and finding happiness with the right desires.

Blogs are the most indirect form of writing

I think blogs are really indirect and that when it offends someone, he must be really hurting deep down inside. If he uses stuff as a threat and the judge just has to act mad with you not following the rules, I guess it's a real big boo-boo when you didn't mean for it to happen that way.

I now understand what I must do. It's really understanding the boundaries of my strengths and weaknesses and the powers that lie ahead in what I am doing. I guess writing in this type of form is really teaching me a lot because it allows me to unload all that is unnecessary.

Happy New Year

I don't really know where I am going at. I don't really want to publish all of my thoughts, out of conflicts of interest. I think I could write about normal things and literally say them out loud, but I would not feel at all that comfortable talking about all the bad things that happened to me. There is a joy in knowing a Creator who is there supporting all of my wishes. It's really a sign of how things in this world are not always as they seem.

I have always felt this toss up. Isaiah 1:18, "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool." Even though bad things happen to me and I don't go about fixing them when I could always. I sometimes see that being a good person takes a lot of humility and pain. It really hurts to just feel pain and not communicate it sometimes.

Controversy with Mass Mailing?

The post title is actually made with a question mark. I usually tend to generalize a lot of my topics but this one is sort of closing in. I will do my best to not write while I am feeling frustrated at some people. In the past, I have actually written a lot of e-mails to people regarding my club just to promote it. A friend told me that my writing was controversial and that some people placed me on their filters. It was so funny. There should be a lot of accountability involved when it comes to writing to people; otherwise, people will just lose interest in what you are trying to tell them.

I have done a lot of suffering in the past, but never thought that my writing was such a killer to people's souls. I think some people just don't like the idea of having to appear self-righteous and tell you personally their dislikes in writing. They like to really cover it up and spread it through a different form of gossip. I don't think people really care totally what I write, but respect a lot of my statements. I think some people get really flustered when you write diffidently because they can't get a lock on what you are trying to tell them, especially when the focus is on some topic of scorn. People have a pattern of bad-mouthing, but when you introduce it with a different pattern and try to break the ice; people really don't want to question their upbringing. Even though people may say they hate what I do, I think deep down inside they are really hurting with the fact that they aren't perfect people. A pure intent of trying to glorify God should really have no painful dramatic effect on perfect people. This is a real topic that I will be trying to flirt with for awhile just to give my feedback without trying to specifically blame anyone.

Merry Christmas - Living for God

Living under faith with Jesus has been an extreme challenge. It's so easy to get carried away in our emotions and totally lose ourselves from the important priorities in life. I try with all my might but I always come up short. It has to be all about Jesus empowering and filling my life with this joy and purpose. I am not trying to come across as this religious person, but just want to get closer to knowing who Jesus is. I don't have all the answers and my prayers should truly be about God's glory.

Recently, I have been struggling with this one thing that can't seem to get out of my life. I will only write this because it's my blog and seems to be common with other guys. I'm dealing with sexual desires in my life and boy it's getting stronger. I really long for that intimacy these days for some reason. There are no guarantees in life always, but the main principle is to trust in the Lord for everything. The wonderful fruits that God's principles provide should be examined to show that a true loving Savior can give us all we need in this fallen world.

Step 2 to Leading a Pretty Girl

After you hear her say that she has absolutely nothing against you, like the words "No resentment." Try to forgive her with what you are mad about. It's really hard to deal with the pet peeve, but you know she likes you so you want to try to not be a big meanie. It takes a real man to be able to forgive a woman who does crazy things to you, all out of love, especially if she strikes your weak spots.

The next step is to embrace her because you have a good reason that she might like you. Have her communicate something related to what you are mad about with her. Don't make it so obvious with her mistake. Then, reassure her that it's okay to embrace her differences with you.

For example, a woman blocked a man she felt uncomfortable with on MySpace. She told the man that she had absolutely nothing against him. The man is extremely annoyed about it because he can't find a good reason. He later feels that the woman likes him. The man is going to forgive her and express it by embracing the woman. He asks the woman at church, if she has ever been in a serious dating relationship with anyone. No matter what the response, he then lets her know that she answered the most important question and that he doesn't mind the differences that he has with her. He then ends up hugging her and kissing her on the cheek. Do you think she'll run away if the man sits by her? My guess is that she won't.

How You Can Lead A Pretty Girl

I think by using discernment it's sometimes a little unwise to publicize our desires, unless it deals directly with serving the Lord. No matter how weird it seems for the cause, I think there's really no worry in how we should go about glorifying God. Surely, we don't want to really lose sight of Him. We all will fall to sin daily, but it does not mean that Jesus won't be there to pick us back up when it happens. Jesus truly loves each and every one of us. He treats us like his children. Being sons and daughters of an unfailing God is like an ultimate treasure.

Currently, my tastes have been changing around a little bit. To want to better serve God, I have been going through a little tension with this female discussion leader at this small church. I think we definitely have desires for each other but not at the right place, currently. This is something that I am willing myself to write, which is that your height and appearance don't really matter that much as long as you try to stay healthy enough. She had a great first impression on me, but don't want to go into all the details and theorize my whole marriage plan! I think the first step to amending a good one-on-one relationship with a female servant in Christ is for the good-looking brother to initiate a cordial friendship. It could be funny, sweet, romantic, or plain; whatever suits your need or personality. Do not be over-aggressive in tone and start getting mad at her face; just convince yourself that she really likes you and you only want to be friends with this attractive girl (so serious)- this will help you think you are in control of the whole situation.

Making Sure Time is Not Wasted

I realize that I am not that gifted because I missed out so much on life by feeling down with myself. I think I should never have done that to myself. I now see that I'm almost stuck here with no where to go. I can truly thank God for giving me the opportunity to be able to walk in a relationship with Jesus. Surely, Jesus is the way, truth, and life. He will steadfastly return one day to this planet to restore what belongs to him. It's amazing how reading through the whole Bible that it can make sense with how we are supposed to conduct ourselves. We're all sinners, basically; no one's righteous on their own might. I now see that praying to God and growing in my faith daily as I fellowship with Him is becoming better for me. The first thing for me is to always work on the heart and to allow God to cleanse me of all unrighteousness before proceeding. It looks as if I am called to live out my life to gain favor with everyone and to be diligent and to be joyful in the Lord.

I hope that by obtaining a lot of knowledge through good influence and the job that I'm working on that I will be able to be pleasing to God. I think I have a lot more to go, since life is rough and tough for me right now. I need to learn to take the right footsteps and overcome every obstacle. I believe that my needs right now are to make the right choices and be satisfied living to please God. Right now I have a lot of free time to myself to obtain good knowledge and to fill up with passion and to be able to have a better fitness level. I am blessed to be living and to have privileges that I never once thought I did. It looks as if I have been taking too many things for granted, while looking down upon myself. I am learning to gradually make better ends meet for myself, which I need to do.

Letter and Notes Dealing with offended Christian leaders

Example letter:

Dear _____,

You recently stated your decision-making personal preferences dealing with people. I am largely bothered by how it affects me emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. (Please let me finish) I think you should reconsider the values of serving in a ministry. Excluding outsiders and me from your normal events, such as unfolded in social networking sites like Facebook is a sign that you are a falling leader (or person). You ought to not be making a public declaration that you would sacrifice unity for the sake of pleasing your personal comforts. Perhaps, spiritual mentorship over men is not your forte and so maybe you would want to exclude your Bible study group to only women or only suggesting, give your title to someone equipped to serve the purposes of God with better clarity.

Questions:

1. Birthday, books, relationship, hobbies discussed in caregroup.
2. Personal preference outweighs the interest of another person/ or for ministry.
**3. When would you hypothetically block another person and was my conduct worth it?
Trying to forgive but causing friction. Not going to convey a positive meaning to others without being open to each other.
4. If I saw your account through another friend and left a comment would you mind?
5. Do you feel your emotions are always stable?
6. Do you distrust what others will write and want me not to see it?
7. Are you using your own moral standards because you don't want to change?
8. Do you feel like I'm attacking your moral dignity?
9. Do you think I am too unpredictable?
10. Would would you have me done to make you feel comfortable? Can you put it into words that describe outward behaviors?
11. When you say "Ignore it", do you mean that for only your happiness?
12. Is it just not rejecting a person's passive style that's not so everyday while something bad was hapening to you?
13. Do you have good intentions with your personal preference?
14. You social interactions including personal preferences appear selfish, if they aren't what are they?
15. Your personal preferences dealing with people appear that you are selective to those who you find perfect, is that the right way for you to conduct yourself?

You can feel uncomfortable with yourself with a guilty conscience, and so how can you avoid yourself with that personal preference? As a result, how do you use personal preference of discomfort with someone who claim to be comfortable with, but has made you feel uncomfortable? Example: bad present, bad joke, bad hair day!

Questions for People Who Wronged You

1. Wasn't your birthday, books, relationship, or hobbies discussed in a group with me?
2. Does your personal preference outweigh the interest of another person?
3. When would you hypothetically block this person and was my conduct worth it?
4. If I saw your Facebook page through another friend and left a comment, would you mind?
5. Do you feel your emotions are always stable?
6. Do you distrust what others will say about you and want me not see or hear about it?
7. Are you using your own moral standards because you don't want to change?
8. Do you feel like I'm attacking your moral integrity?
9. Do you think I am too unpredictable?
10. What would you have me done to make you feel comfortable? Can you put it into words that describe outward behaviors?
11. When you say "Ignore it", do you mean that for only your happiness?
12. Is it just not rejecting a person's passion style that's not so everyday while something bad was happening to you?

Note: Before developing questions, it would be nice to screen the individual by having a warm discussion and communicating after releasing your angry moments of wanting to really argue. Just put your head down and let the feeling pass before continuing. If it helps with the opposite sex, find reasons why she really likes you. Don't get so consumed in it...

Managing Emotions

I have had a tough time understanding my emotions, and how to relate it with people. I am not sure why one day, but I just felt bad if people rejected my offer of hanging out. I guess I lacked a lot of purpose with doing things and felt bad about wanting the things that I needed. I have had really good friends go out with me by taking granted for them. One of the weirdest things for me is that I can really hold back aggression for awhile, until I need to let it out. I just need to manage my emotions a whole heck of a lot better and be myself. It's pretty cool that I incorporate manners a lot and can feel a little zoned out with people, at times. I guess it's learning to forgive through my sensitivity. It's had some tolls on me, but I think I'll be fine. In a way, writing to a people who I hardly knew at the time seemed like a great experiment to see where I stand. It becomes very tough to stand for what's right when one gets totally angry. On the other hand, if you feel victimized and so guilty about everything and then relent by destroying your own personality because of a misunderstanding then that can be really hard to deal with. It takes a lot of emotional balance to deal with these situations.

I don't know where I really left off, but I guess I decided to be considerate to everyone. I think venting my thoughts through writing and feeling nervous about the reception was a great way for me to grow. It's been part of my identity, as I have been accustomed to doing these things. My mom and neighbor have told me to not to take these things so seriously. I guess having just a tad of frustration is good enough for me because I don't seem to go super crazy when venting in person, whether writing or statement. I do not believe in cursing out someone. I do not even know what's going on fully through a person's head and so I need feedback from these people who can get bad moods. What a tough realization! I don't really care anymore whether it's going to be negative or positive. I need to try to look at things where logically and reason it out with these people, even while I'm angry. I need to always be considerate, even while I'm angry. I just have to be assertive and allow myself to be more laid back.

Relational Things With People

Writing is a great way for me to unload. Maybe people may be feeling like I've lost base with them through writing in like, hey, "You are ignoring me." In actuality, I am trying to give real effort in being considerate and letting them know what I don't like about them. It's amazing because I can actually live through the hardships and have to always feel left out. I really do have private feelings that I do not want to publicly address. It seems to be abusive to my soul to write things that I would rather keep to myself. I think sharing is really important, and knowing that I'm pretty good against emotional arguments, I probably could set an agenda while being completely honest.

The problem that I had in the past was that I would be too sensitive about everything. I would take it so personal, like things would all fall on me with a burden that was too hard for me to deal with. What I am starting to realize is that if I develop good faith in a person, then he or she will react positively with me. It takes a lot of focus and practice to gain a total understanding. To be willing to work through the pressures, anger, attractions, anxieties, and compassion. For me, I really enjoy being filled with an emotion that has regard for others. It feels good to do something about it and put the person at ease. I am going through a lot of trials, and it's so important for me to not lose it. I know that certain types of people can understand my drives, but as I am becoming more conservative and relaxed, I don't need to feel bad about everything. I am armed with a mouth of all types of reason- emotional and physical. I have to see passed through it- I'm like thinking that life deals with marriage. I truly have nothing against guys marrying women I like; I'm happy for them and wish them well and will pray for their success. I believe in honoring a person's marriage to a very high standard.

The only real problem is that I sometimes conceive myself as being short. Well, I do have a mouth and if I want to help then I just need to holler. People don't seem to barge in all of a sudden and just say that I can't do something. I think I've attracted taller women without a problem, which is a total bonus! I am so serious; one time, I received a highly enthused call about hanging out with two, unrelated beautiful believers at separate times. I think it was from putting up a positive attitude at a car dealership not doing so well and making a courtesy call for them to come down. It's baby making season! Oh yeah, and I happen to be around the corner. I just need to stop being so stupid with thinking that I'm short. I have to deal with these insignificant emotions and let it get out of my system. I have a very large testosterone build-up that wants to be engaged only in marriage and causes me to want to be there for the woman of my life. I know who she is, and I hope she can make me the most fortunate man in the world. I'm not the greatest individual out there and so I can understand if passions ensue elsewhere in the end. However, I want to really know her and do the things she likes doing and so God will be still great no matter we form a family or not. I now feel blessed to have received this calling to marry.

Battle With The Misfits

I think I can literally pinpoint sometimes who the insecure people are, especially by them wronging me in certain areas. Perhaps, they are trying to battle with themselves of a total insecurity that they are unaware of. I've never thought of writing this type of subject but I think they have a truly bad outcome in the future because of their unwilling minds to expand. It takes time to get to know one, and I can sort of see the negativity behind the social engagements. I have seen this type of person before, and I truly don't need to apologize to them for whatever reason. It should be the other way, around. =)

I have never really thought that writing could become a tool for offending people. You basically write with confidence and then see how they react. With the events that circulate, sometimes these readers can fail to see the truth behind nothing in visual text. I'm really holding back all my frustrations and engaging in slight mental laughter and allowing them to read it. It's an area where I hold a ton of power to these readers. They can try to offset me in the social world, but it comes at a price. If they mention it to anyone, it will be to their downfall. If I say it, I just get some laughs from friends. My intentions are not really to harm, and if I have no legal law suits and even if I'm very personable with writing, these individuals seriously have an issue. I'm finally seeing that they really know about their own problems. I think my personality displayed on any medium is a force that's helping and brings the truth out of people. I just need to not let my anger get in the way with these pet peeves. If I do, it will only be relenting to trouble. I can seriously see myself with victory from the hard work I put into it. God has made me into a peace keeper, and now that I know, I don't have to be afraid to work under annoyances and stay patient.

Struggles With Desire

Life is filled with temperamental desires.
The emotions that set you apart from others can leave you.
Struggles and undefined values of the past.
Longing to have something-that has now departed.

The will of the Lord is to sometimes make us bolder.
To make sense and meaning in life by living the right way.
To know the love of the Creator and be reminded by it.
Daily bread that can satisfy us all to the heart's content.

Persuasive Ethics

This title is something that I sort of conjured up from examining my personality. This area is something I have an issue with priding over, possibly because I've been placed in these situations of discomfort. Take for example, you write a letter then the person hates it and then continue to write letters he hates and then all of a sudden there's a restraining order, for an event outside of not intentionally writing a letter that he would hate under stress.

It could be very frustrating for a stubborn person and by natural right, I think it's fine to feel that way. If your attitude is angry but trying to hold back from hurting the individual where you make painstaking decisions with the writing of the words, but fire in some bad sentences then I think it should be given you some credit for at least trying to be yourself. The issue of the matter is then to see if it's worth going in for the gem, which is patch up the relationship. I believe that females may actually be a little sneaky with trying to push you away, but give you a chance if you did something to aggravate her by trying to be nice in a certain bad period. A good technique when around authority is to state what made you broken inside and be authentic about trying to make it right. While making this attempt, if you feel so horrible and not sure and confused, then I think compassion ensues in your area. In the battle of the wits, you can sometimes make them appear higher but I suggest not to do that because there's too much fear involved and can totally mess your direction. It's so important to never resort to violence and be apologetic only when you have to. I don't know if this is a correct way, but I'm not apologizing without an understanding because I want people to change sometimes. There's a lot of temptations involved with wanting them to suffer when you know you did not do anything wrong to them. It's important to limit these feelings and exercise the freedom of choice - love!

The issue then arising is how you are feeling at the moment. For me, I really hate these periods where people try to push you away momentarily from feeling bad about themselves. I feel like I have a burden from what I did. The issue then becomes where you want to lead the correspondence to. I usually shoot for bringing back the acquaintance to par, meaning the area I enjoyed them being in. I believe that by possessing good character, being attentive, and having honesty by assuming that you are not at fault, there's a possibility of them coming to like you. Sometimes, I do things without fully understanding people. These circumstances are rough because you want answers. If you don't get it, it's so frustrating. Even through all the negativity, if you maintain a nice personality, I think they will eventually tell you. Sometimes I act on sheer consciousness with the answer I received. The answers of what to do is sometimes a natural thing of beauty, which should be always done with true intentions of love! Even if they don't like you, I think you can sometimes captivate them with how you lead them with pure, loving intentions. It's a matter of persistence, even if they say they don't want to, it's a matter of battling wills. If you perceive that they did more wrong to you, but don't want to harm the individual, then I suggest to keep going at it.

Be discerning of when the right time to apologize happens. Don't apologize for the wrong thing! It will prevent the person from growing as a more deeper individual, and they can actually view you as a weak individual later. Be sure to maintain an understanding through all the negative emotions. You need to maintain a moral self-respect to be able to justifiably love this individual that you are not pleased with. I think it's natural to go by your desires, but always keep it ethically clean. It's fun to have fun through the process, but things can get ugly for you if you don't bring it up with them. The yelling part is something I truly abhor on both sides. I really hate being yelled at and don't like to yell, but have resorted to it under countless frustrations of hearing physical screams in my memory bank. Yelling should be avoided at all costs, but sometimes it may be done out of love and anguish. Don't do it just because you love to. Sometimes tons of fear can arise from around these people who are plainly filled with weirdness in their hot pursuit of being angry and doing stupid things to make others distrust them, it's an area that sometimes requires pure bravery and some help from God.

Thanksgiving Pursuit of God

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone or glad that you were able to read this after the date. I'm realizing that my struggles and successes can be so easy to be consumed with that you can forget the big picture of God's salvation. Having been tested so erratically because of my former eccentric ways of being taciturn, I realize that commitment through my sufferings have been not always done in vain. It's wonderful to have better people to step up the plate, after you die to yourself and have had major battles with getting business going.

I believe there are key elements to being successful in life. However, I'm starting to learn that the result won't always be pretty and will often entail the deepest pet peeves you could ever dream of. My younger sister has told me that making friends are very easy; this implies to me you don't ever have to worry about how you come across as a person as long as you observe some natural ethics. It's quite funny that by being quiet, it's been easy for me to be overlooked and that I heard some very odd conversations about people being rude from her and roommates. Man, those sort of things really offend me. By being so mustered, I took on the role of trying to evangelize because I feel this bravery that takes over me. This sense of satisfaction from telling people that they are loved by Jesus in no matter what condition they are in. It's been tough for me to always point the good because I would often find myself upset at people's criticism and especially, if the sister starts yelling and screaming just because you said a word she did not understand! 1 Corinthians 13 of the Bible states that love is not rude and is patient. Thanks to accepting pure honesty with myself, which takes a lot of bravery to do; I think that the heart is the most important for any individual. The natural-outward appearance gets complimented through observing healthy practices, being diligent, having a wonderful personality, confidence, and giving effort.

What I'm trying to say is that it's worth suffering by limiting entertainment, doing hard work, and getting to know your innate desires. Some desires might actually be so entertaining and inspiring to give thanks to the Lord! I think as long as you trust in the Lord, you can definitely not have any fear of losing it; especially, if you try to do things for God's kingdom. I'm not saying to become a missionary and make these big changes that you are not comfortable with. I'm saying being open to making adjustments without being selfish.

Social Courage

I know that for me, I'm a really short guy and as a result I've felt very shy and discouraged about sexually advancing on women during those sinful years. For the taller guys out there, there are very nice guys who sometimes feel insecure about being just plain tall. It's pretty funny to read that this balances out for them with women being naturally attracted to them. What I am coming to realize is that almost everyone still respects me even though they might try to do harm to me.

Maybe there's this ironic tall guy's way-of-thought by associating myself with being short. A chiropractor and yes, he's a licensed practitioner informed me with aid of this machine that I should weigh in at 152 pounds with my height of 5' 3.5". That's pretty ironic with the weight being a little high. I am just 160 pounds at the moment. People are like, "That's it?" when they see me sometimes. According to National Heart and Lung Institute by using the Body Mass Index - http://www.nhlbisupport.com/bmi/, I am considered to be substantially overweight. My next-door neighbor asked me if I took steroids because she felt my chest was too big. When people guess my height, they usually add about an inch. I've stood on my toes and any noticeable change in chest does not really occur. I have sort of been feeling that I need to take advantage a little ever since writing. It's sort of made me feel guilty a little to write to people with no harm's way intended for them and then receive this mystical reaction of how they were just plain hurt by it. The majority of people don't seem to mind what I write.

It's probably this circumstance where you just don't want to wake up and find that your life has to suck for a little bit. So with this negativity being implied from what they may feel from a pretty decent guy, all these small issues that they can't resolve must make them bitter. It's interesting indeed, and I have to live with it. I thought midgets could do this nicely and get away with it! I'm not getting that special treatment! Oh man, I have to change my perceptions a little and give my appearance some more credit. People have been telling me "So what?!" about my height, even those who think "You're so short!" When I get placed with that sort of criticism, I think I still want to be prolific. I think I might not have too much to worry about it because my appearance meets an expectation that I can protect another individual, if I truly work at it.

In a way, I know that I am not really getting any special treatment. I have been very sensitive about my appearance and how it's been bugging me throughout life. I do not want to undergo any surgery, just have this feeling that I wish I could be this way a little more sometimes. My mom just wishes to tell me to shut up, every time I nag to her about being short. Maybe it's another indication that I am normal to her and that I'm really hurting myself for a stupid reason. I think I can now afford to earn the trust of women who may feel I am a bitter rivalry.

There must be a trick to all of this nonsense. There are people in my life who I truly respect with a committed passion. Maybe if I placed them in the shoes while writing to these people who I feel annoyed with, it would give a pretty normal and respectful effect. So maybe I might need some time to reason it out these days.

Trying Hard And Enduring Suffering

Sometimes, it could feel as if people do not want to deal with you. It takes a lot of work, especially when you don't know what's happening. I have dealt with a lot of harsh situations and turned up a little short on knowing where my successes lie. It takes a little bit of talent to be able to come up with things on the fly. You always wish you could have this ideal situation, but it might not always come to pass. I think if it's a manageable situation then things can really occur in what you were looking for.

A lot of it for me deals with having an open heart. To be able to carry the burden of a big heart and be diligent. I think one of the neat things about being born different is that it could used as an advantage. Let's say, I was burned up in a car accident which would be really enraging and stressful or make me want to get some plastic surgery. I think if there's an understanding we can negotiate then things turn out better. For me, my crippling effect has been failure to get a grip of myself. I realize that I'm trying to keep my intentions to the purest form with no compromise and be honest without any intent of hurting the person. It gets frankly odd that a person may not see this as good and go spinning out of control, like it's okay for them to show it around me. I don't think I really have anything to apologize for. More or less, it must be just a person's sinful nature that I'm dealing with. I must be standing in his or her way. The balance that occurs is to think about the opposition. I think it's just simply that they don't like it, but what I really feel is that they are going to put themselves in a guilty situation. I really have to learn the right conduct to stay happy with these people who just plainly associate with weirdness.

Made Up Jack and Jill Story

One day, Jack and Jill were playing on a hill. Jack was the older brother, who used to watch his parents fight all the time. Jack always longed for a little brother that he could rough-house, but he never had one. Jill longed to be a middle child and have a little sister. Jill also did not receive her wish. Jack grew up a little mentally messed up from feeling lack of confidence. He felt low body-image and brain power, even though he excelled pretty well in school. He was a pretty well-disciplined boy, but felt an empty load of stress. It came to a period in life where Jack finally decided to put up his covers and stop considering others. He was just so fed up with everyone hurting his feelings by feeling so sensitive.

Jill on the other hand grew up pretty assertive and eventually started using some foul language. Jack does not know where Jill gets it from. Jack having a messed up head starts pumping adrenaline and gets no regard for his sister. It turned out to be a wrestling match because he was only trying to hug Jill. Jack did throw Jill into the grass once. I think Jack did not mind so much because he felt she would not get hurt. Jill then tiger-clawed Jack on the neck. Jack said, "You are hurting me." "Let go!" Jill said. Jack is the older brother and had absolutely no regard for his behavior that night. Jack was so fed up with Jill about not letting him change the radio station and being insulted for his taste in music. He was also fed up with Jill being so rude to him. Jill said, "I could take you! I could take you!" She wanted to avoid getting hugged, so she started screaming "Help me! Help me!" The neighbors would hear her and Jack would just stand there letting Jill look like a fool. Later, Jack stamped on Jill's car window and kept apologizing for his testosterone-driven moment. Jill just sped off, I think in the end, Jack was declared the victor.

Living In Confidence With Jesus

These days I sometimes feel like I'm a loose junkie because I can't get worries off my mind that I'm not in the same situation anymore. I guess I don't feel so secure about being very stable with myself always, like nothing is happening in my life. I really want to feel excited about something. It's really difficult for me to place commitments in this world because I've brought myself down so many times. I think by placing my desires upon living out the Bible, it has made me feel more encouraged to be of this world. Even through our shortcomings, it's by figuring out that the center of our very lives is on the Savior of this world that we fill ourselves back up when things are tough.

Repentance is truly a vital part, to get right with God. I know that some of us are more consumed with other things- it could be having looks, money, the best girlfriend/boyfriend, or stability. Through all the sufferings that occur, some have fallen even into suicide and selfish crimes only to allow the Enemy of this world to momentarily, weaken the faith. I get really uncomfortable around others at times too, with the thought of not wanting to come across as a negative person. It's been really hard for me to make negative remarks about people; it's like I want to try to still stay nice. I've sometimes believed that by reconciling with the people who have been against me, after being friendly to them, we would have a stronger relationship.

I believe that the curiosity of sex has also made me a little naughty on myself. Here's what I've come to discover, sexual abstinence leading up to marriage should be very sexy with all the tensions and strings flying up to the roof. Even if you are single and desiring it so much, you just have to be brave and observe God's command, so that you can reap this sexy benefit. It may be hard to see emotionally when under distress, but following God's commands are really in our best interest because the Lord has interest in all our human needs. We don't have to settle for second best under the Lord's wing. We just need to have a strong relationship with Jesus. I guess we know where our strengths and weaknesses are. It's generally important to me to really be able to see the potential goodness placed on the heart. Losing it could just really disrupt the flow in each of our lives. What the Bible truly says is by taking the whole account of the Bible and letting the Spirit teach us. This happens by having a strong relationship with Jesus. The relationship can grow even with the faith of a mustard seed.

Self-discipline and Being Dashing

I guess my life right now is centered around being emotionally filled. I've been through some ups and downs with inexplicable matters at times, but I'm not quite ready to classify myself as a person who has bi-polar disease. I think life is characterized with difficulties sometimes. To go through some pains of development because without it, it's hard to stay humbled. I think some people feel hardships in their heart but try to internalize it to try to encourage others to stay on pace. Some of these people could also go through misconceptions that they are angry about and start being disruptive in their private social circles, too.

I haven't done much growing apart with individuals because I haven't confided in what makes me unique or acceptable to others. Philippians 4:13 says, "I can do all things in Christ who strengthens me." I believe that God has developed man in His image, but that because of sin in our human nature; His Spirit has called us to become reliant on Him for direction and answers. I have heard parents and elders tell me to have self-esteem. I've been a little reluctant about doing it for just confidence because I'm questioning some of my selfish motives, right now.

I think the more useful approach to encourage ourselves is to develop self-discipline and being dashing. By being self-disciplined, we can avoid things that surely make us and other people who count in our lives unhappy. By being dashing, the energy can be circulated from love and it's healthy to interact with others and to be so enthused about being around good people. These two attributes to me are down-to-earth and not encouraging others to be deceitful and selfish. It's just a pure coincidence in how God intended for us to truly help ourselves.

Election Time of the Year

I think my writing has finally come to a period with my development of keeping in check with reliance on the Holy Spirit. I believe that the best times have occurred from trying to be in overdrive and not worrying so much about how I am conceived. I think by being that way and tuning out to some friends going through a mid-life crisis of some sort really caused me to get some frustrated remarks. I guess people can feel a little jealous with you sometimes and them not knowing it. I used to feel really diffident, shy, and left out of the circle without that effortless ability we all need from each other.

It's come to a time in my life where it's really about making a stand for the truth. Today's date marks a very important day in history for a lot of us. We all have a good part in the making of something. Today is the Election Day with some important propositions to vote upon. I guess I became really rattled growing up and now that I'm getting out of it and willing to make some life's improvements for myself, I realize that my passions can be good but sometimes selfish. I have tried countless times to deprive my heart of desires by growing up, it's been hard to just want to give up. In anything I did, I would also conceive this expectation of myself and be willing to spend hours working at it. I would always find people better than me because of my nervousness. I'm starting to grow out of all those things. The Bible has truly been a mystery to me and changed my life through living out its applications. In a sense, I feel so free to be myself and acknowledge that there is a loving Creator out there to heal the heart, which is way more important than the countenance.

When Things Get Rough

When things get rough, I've realized that placing trust in God to deliver me into better times has come true. Sometimes, it's hard for an individual to see where God is especially if everything does not quite fit in a complete puzzle for him or her. I know that I've struggled emotionally to find Jesus, but there's been a period where I just decided to dedicate my time to studying the Bible and listening to the inspired teaching of God's Word. It's really filling and edifying and sometimes, our lives need to center around it so we don't starve ourselves and place our focus on idols of this world.

Currently, with my life I am trying to find a job to focus on. I have also had some friends ask me if I have a girlfriend. My next door neighbor and mom are expecting me to find a nice woman to marry soon. They just emphasize how they would want their man to have a stable job so that she could be supported by him. It's like the guy is supposed to support the woman and not the other way around. It must stem from how they are really tired with working so hard and want some relaxation. I think women seem to feel a little more bothered than guys do at times. Another friend told me the man in a relationship is someone who she gets to lean on during her fallen moments. I can really live with it because there's a joy in living with the spouse you really love and become best friends with. Right now, my life is a little tough because my emotions are not quite what they used to be. I really need to refrain from some things so that I can experience a more self-controlled life and allow the Holy Spirit to move me. I feel really good about marrying someone right now. I just can't deny what God may have in store for me with someone. I know that the world sees us as young still and marrying at around the age of twenty-five seems to be average. I will admit that my heart is desiring and getting excited to know more about a woman whose my type.