Let's see, for my candidate list at the current moment, I only have four girls to choose from. I'm really close with three of them. The fourth one is cute and she bought me lunch, yes (!), and talked about how cool it is to hang out together. She's the best on the list so far, but I'm so hesitant still from not being that sure if I should pursue a relationship with her to begin with. I just don't want to be not sure and ask. I'd like to be sure and then deal with her mess of saying stuff that could break my heart. I can get over it fast. I think one of the girls on my list actually did break my heart, but I got over it from her actually being really sweet and maintaining a cute friendship with me. I treasure friendships a lot with these girl and don't really care who is friend-zoning who if that is going among us two. Four girls is already a hand full to have a nice connection with and to communicate openly with.
One of these girls has a severe mental condition, another has anxiety issues, the most stable one of them is in a long and ongoing partnership/relationship with a guy and is cool about expressing how much she's into me using strong words like love and kissing emojis in texts (the one that broke my heart), and the best choice at the moment has never been in a relationship and it's possible we're from opposite backgrounds so that would be hard to overcome.
I think I want to increase my candidate list! Being friends is so satisfying with them and going for more like a sexual marriage would be so fun too! I really want to work at developing my ideal body more and increase amount of free time with better income from doing something I'm interested in. I know I've already found it. It's just that with this busy schedule and having some lack of discipline, I'm just hanging on at the moment and working at getting there still.
Academy of Scrappy Credible Undergraduate Desire
