Time To Give It Up

I feel like I have an influence in people's lives now. I did not know this and some of the actions that I'm taking requires extreme precision to not make it so immoral for myself. I can literally have anything that I want- this is what I believe, so it makes it easy for me to be more patient with my attitude.

Sex, money, power, and friends don't really mean that much to me as having this close bond with my maker. It's just coming to being tied together just in faith. I'm not afraid anymore or nervous. Even if I am now, I know that I can overcome this situation now. I now have blunt honesty which is actually making me aware of what I need to try. Writing commitments on this blog seems to have a more powerful effect upon me, so yeah I'm never going to go kill anyone with this blog.

On the bright side, I'm glad that the restraining order was something that I could write about and it is fairly a common thing to experience for some people. I don't think I really needed a lawyer to defend my own restraining order and man this female lawyer really wanted to defend me like crazy because she knew I was innocent. That's what my instincts are telling me- she originally hated me, but later really liked me in person and laughed at the girl who placed a restraining order on me. My reaction is just shrugged shoulders.

I might as well enjoy myself a little on this blog, even if it makes sense to nobody but just me. I think I could damage Betty Lam's reputation, if I confront her again. My whole imagery of confrontation is just based on honesty and doing it with a calm persona- that's just too hard to fight off for any girl, in my opinion. Heck, it could even be discerned as being nice and flirtatious to her. So yeah, my advice would be to never leave out honesty and mature feelings. My reputation never sucked in the first place because I'm just lucky in those kind of areas I guess. Even with two restraining orders, it's like the two who placed it me, those types of friends are not really well-regarded and I guess they try to make themselves that way but come up short still.  What I think was wrong about Betty was that she tried to testify against me at court, but the judge really didn't let her. She like remained frustrated with me that she would even block my phone calls. I think I should really call her up again and not mind her dumb rants about placing a restraining order on me. I'm a man, I could do this. I'm going in to calm her angry persona down. I'm so surprised she hasn't even changed her number yet to start like a new life or something. Would it bother me if she changed her number? No. Would it bother me if she went out me? Possibly. Hmm, this should be a no-brainer than in facing her and not really caring if she wants to do something immoral with me because that stuff it something I can brush off like chaff while complaining how it tickles too much.