An area that I believe a person can't be their complete selves with yet until it's been discovered is their sexual identity. The Bible is pretty big on talking about how good sex can really be enjoyed when it isn't being abused. It's going to sound pessimistic if I haven't already because there are some negatives to abusing sex and I don't want to sugar code it with optimism because I need to be honest. That being said, I think I said enough about the truth with sex. Basically, the Bible says to work on a good heterosexual courtship that builds on love and trust which builds into a marriage that introduces sex or good romance for the females for recreation and procreation. All of this isn't said to control people like critics of religion think - haha; it's meant to be said and done because it's absolutely a good thing and recognized by others as good too. Here comes the real challenge that a few people may realize the truth with- what if these good things really came from the heart of an all-knowing and compassionate God?
Like this one Christian author and the many that came after him, I've had to battle with my own sex demons - hehe. I felt too embarrassed to write the truth of what I really did like some cleaning up sex addicts have said and realized. A real danger to never getting out of a rut dealing with lust is rationalizing by saying something like "Oh, I never slept with anyone outside of marriage and never will even though I look at porn and kill myself with masturbation daily." Okay, I will release my own dirt onto the world and have nothing to hide. If the feds thought I was stupid, so be it and let them come take me in to be punished for my wretched mistakes.
I have been rationalizing so much about my sexual fantasies - yeah, I sound crazy just like the rest in the world right? I have preferences which I don't think really matter when it comes to true love and is only shallow at the very heart of the matter. To me, when it comes to being in love and experiencing a healthy relationship, it really doesn't matter who the spouse is as long as you're married to her and very attracted to her.
With my thoughts on Christian principles and daily struggles that I find myself dealing with which connect with people, I could probably write a novel of some sort that just talks about life. It's a good release point for me, and I know how people cuss all the time even those you never thought would like Oprah haha, so I'm personally against expressing myself to the world with cuss words no matter how open it may seem sometimes. When I'm by myself and so stressed out, I don't mean to curse during that point in time. I am a believer of Jesus, so Jesus is not a cuss word. I am also a believer that some will be led to hell, so hell is not a cuss word for me either. I mostly say "Shoot" all the time when I do something bad. So next time, when I'm taking a shoot, it means that I'll be doing something that I don't really want to talk about.
So masturbation is the M-word, no there's something else that's worse. I loved my grandmother by the way, and she was dearly loved by others. My momma is sometimes a little cranky so maybe I wouldn't believe insults about her coming from some "Foos" and homies haha. I would probably want to whack them so hard with a baseball bat like they were a thug, but then again they have a mommy I could talk about too.
I don't really need to cover all that insecure junk about my sexual life haha. I'm pretty much secure in all those areas now and just believe it's just the way of life and there are rules of attraction that just follow through. The thing I would probably need to talk about are the topics of masturbation, porn, and lust on this blog. I plan on being very straight-forward and going to use the Bible as my reference; whatever I can muster and pick up as I go.
Academy of Scrappy Credible Undergraduate Desire
