Making A Few More Efforts

I think what is really distracting to me is if I write funny things to people I'm bothered by. The reason why I do this is because I'm so mad that I'm blowing off my steam by laughing my head off while making fun of that person after writing something for them to read about themselves. The fact that I'm still alive means that I've been reasonable enough for them to not try to get back at me and see if they can force me to move on!

I guess I love being in the spotlight for that little thing that bothers me and only to have that special moment with only the person, so writing in a way to people I'm mad at is always sort of like my botched mating call. It's never going to turn out that pretty, no matter how hard I try. People being people and selfish about not wanting to deal with someone who they can't really get in trouble and more angry than I am at the moment for making fun of them and being rude like that, they have usually ended up blocking my messages. I then sometimes had the nerve to keep on writing to them still by opening up other accounts. It only takes me like a minute because I have like ten different email addresses that I never use. It's usually at my second or third try that they end up ignoring me from that point on or not even use their social media. I'm the guy who gets mad and influences the person I'm mad at to not really put too much attention on it. The ones I'm nice to but iffy about because of his or her strong connection to a dork I have been mad at don't really have this issue with me, which is quite sensible of me I guess!

I might as well just keep on trying hard and to put in the time, energy, and effort while feeling drained and even lacking in motivation a bit. It's like I have to know it's good for me because it's going to keep me occupied and there's a purpose to what I'm doing. I want to live a purpose driven life and going to have to accept that I'm putting on big stakes for practically gaining pennies and have to do those sparingly because it's just in my prideful nature to want to have fun and get away with it after executing them.