I would like to thank all of you, who decided to stop on by this site today. Wherever you are, I'm really touched to see numbers go up that don't belong to me. Yet, I'm not really driven by gaining attention, but more about just getting more comfortable with myself. This has turned into something like a social journal, where I don't really fear any repercussions. I can write so freely about my personal rants all I want to but let's not go there today.
I don't want to be driven by an angry approach to anything anymore. I would rather be this cool and clever guy who outsmarts the worst opponents out there, while not being a well-known hero. I don't need the recognition, in other words and don't mind doing something so impactful for free out of the courage and generosity that comes out of my heart. I'm so much of an idealist to a great fault.
Anyhow, thanks again and I wish everyone a Happy New Year's. I have noticed something new in that if I talk about insecurities that reach acquaintances who relate to them and address it in my naturally sensitive manner with a positive solution at the end that could bring an improvement then, they don't seem to drop me out of their life. Yet these people at the same time don't have much patience because let's face it, they are all candidates to go see a therapist and I sometimes don't want to be that helpful! This is how it was with that old church in Los Angeles. I want to keep on cringing while remembering those days where they did their crazy mob act on me with something that didn't relate to them personally. They are only human and still susceptible to a sinful nature, but it's by being inspired through the Holy Spirit which I believe they rejected for their own selfish means that came about from being angry with me bothering them about telling me what's going on with their messed up heads, that one is able to overcome this trial of blowing up in person and causing a frenzy like they did from being unable to control their emotions and trying to control a situation that they really never had a huge part of to begin with.
I'm still committed to trying to get along with them and am ready for it because this is just my personality of being relational, so I'll be debating a lot of complicated things with them and bringing up their insecurities with me which I'm so capable of doing now.
I have come a long way to becoming really straight-forward about who I am and clarifying main things with people who are upset with me. This happened the other day with my best friend, and I think she seriously likes me a bit more after debating with her in a fair-minded manner about taking a moderate risk of being at gatherings during this pandemic. She boldly claimed that too many people think like me and that's the problem in this world!
I got her to see that I'm a healthy individual who can't spread it from wearing a mask even if I am asymptomatic. I even got her to see that she didn't explain how she felt enough with us and that we incorrectly interpreted her position of being okay about us going to a party. She thought it was going to be a small gathering, but then it ended up ballooning to a lot of people partying at one spot. Fortunately, it was outdoors and people had these natural small cliques that were appropriately spaced apart. My conclusion was that we were lucky to not catch it this time and that's how it's turning out so far because I have no symptoms.
I don't know if I'm a healthy victim but to be safe, I will quarintee myself from her for a couple weeks to be safe. I said that I was doing this all for her; otherwise, I would still be doing my risk assessing and taking a moderate one. This could have made her blush over the phone with me, but it's not like I'm really interested in a serious relationship with her. Well, maybe we already have one from being super close, so it's not anything romantic then.
